Weird Three Kingdoms

Chapter 3954 Cao Cao's Story:
In the late autumn countryside of Qiao County, the sun sets early in the west.

That great battle happened many years ago.

Some people died, and some people are still alive.

Those who die are naturally free from all attachments, and all things are empty, while those who survive are still alive.

The wind swept across the plains, stirring up dust, carrying withered leaves and fallen grass, and passing over the bare treetops, as if lamenting the lush greenery of the past, or perhaps mocking the spring leaves for not understanding the sorrow of winter.

The official roads in Shandong were noticeably worse than those in Guanzhong and Luoyang.

This sense of decay became even more pronounced after leaving the main road.

The road surface, which had been in disrepair for many years, had ruts of varying depths due to the passage of vehicles.

Cao Cao walked on such a road, silently looking at the ruts.

Roads can be made clear and passable with a little repair and smoothing, but...

What about people's hearts?
Cao Cao wore a coarse indigo robe with a straight hem. Due to repeated washing, the original color had faded, reflecting the effect of heavy washing that was sought after in later generations.

There is also a patch of moderate size at the elbow of the straight-hemmed sleeve.

The stitches are rough and crooked.

He sewed it himself.

On Cao Cao's shoulder was a small, flat gray cloth bundle. It was obvious at a glance that it didn't contain much, and there was no sign of any valuable gold or silver.

The hemp shoes on his feet were already torn, and there was a hole in the sole of his right shoe. With each step, Cao Cao could feel the pebbles digging into the soles of his feet.

Occasionally, carriages and horses would pass by, and even when glances fell upon Cao Cao, no one realized that the old servant walking alone on the road was none other than the former Prime Minister Cao…

Cao Cao never expected to be able to return.

As Cao Cao was leaving the Heluo region, the young military officer who had escorted him all the way back to Shandong asked, "Lord Cao... do you still have any relatives or friends to seek refuge with in Qiao County?"

Cao Cao simply shook his head and replied, "Fallen leaves return to their roots...no matter what, one must go back."

Looking back now, Cao Cao's shake of his head at that time was probably more out of bewilderment.

Five years at Feixiongxuan passed by in a flash.

Whether it was due to the Hundred Doctors Hall or the fact that Cao Cao had reduced his intake of high-fat, high-cholesterol, and high-purine foods at Feixiong Pavilion, Cao Cao's body was now somewhat thinner than before, and his migraines had also lessened considerably over the years.

Upon his release from prison, he found his so-called hometown completely changed.

Where should we go back to?
Prime Minister's Mansion?
Whether in Qiao County or Ye City, those vermilion gates and high walls were demolished three years ago.

The wood and stones were confiscated, and the land was allocated to the county school.

Even the assets of the Cao and Xiahou clans in Qiao County had mostly changed hands, and the few remaining properties were nothing more than meager fields barely enough to make a living.

If he were to return to his own home, not only would he be embarrassed, but he would most likely also incur the wrath of his clansmen.

Cao Cao sighed softly, raised his head, and looked towards the northwest direction of the road.

The setting sun was burning the clouds into a poignant red, like undried bloodstains.

Flocks of crows flew by at dusk, heading towards a dark forest in the distance.

Just at the edge of the woods, you can see the outline of a cluster of houses.

That was Madam Ding's estate.

Cao Cao remembered that there was a peach grove on the east side of the manor.

They often played there when they were young.

When spring arrives, the peach grove is filled with peach blossoms, and their fragrance can be smelled for half a mile.

Ding, oh, back then she was called Awan, always loved to sit under the peach tree when the peach blossoms were in full bloom.

Whether it's embroidery or simply keeping him company.

He would either stand on the earthen slope, pointing out the landscape, or recite newly written poems to her amidst the blooming peach blossoms.

Sometimes she would laugh at him for mispronouncing words, and he would deliberately pronounce them even more exaggeratedly, making her so amused that she could barely hold the embroidery hoop in her hands...

"Aman, what do you want to be when you grow up?"

She asked.

She was young, with baby fat and collagen.

The downy hair on her forehead and neck seemed to glow in the setting sun, giving her a golden edge.

He stared blankly for a moment before raising his head again, waving his arms with feigned bravado, "I will be the General Who Conquers the West! Leading 100,000 troops, I will pacify the Western Regions and reclaim lost territory!"

The young man waved his arms, full of vigor and ambition.

He held his head high and spoke with a firm tone, as if he had the world at his fingertips with a mere gesture.

Awan smiled, pursing her lips, "Then... what happens after we conquer the world?"

"After conquering the world..." He thought for a moment, then looked down at her, "I'll come back and watch these peach blossoms with you."

Ah Wan's eyes shone brightly, like stars. "Really?"

"Of course it's true!" he said.

But the peach blossoms bloomed and faded year after year, and he rarely returned...

At least, that young him will never come back.

Cao Cao sighed, lowered his head, and continued walking forward.

As you turn onto the road leading to Zhuangzi, the road surface becomes increasingly dilapidated.

Perhaps because there hadn't been any traffic for a long time, a lot of weeds had grown in the middle of the road, withering away in late autumn.

Just like the gray hair on Cao Cao's head.

He could no longer wear the headdress and could only wrap his head with a piece of coarse cloth.

The manor is getting closer.

Cao Cao's pace slowed down more and more.

He could see the gate tower clearly, but the manor gate was tightly shut.

The paint on the gate has peeled off in many places, revealing the grayish-brown base.

One of the door knockers was missing, and the only one that remained seemed to have been replaced with an iron one, which looked even more rusty red in the setting sun.

The place above the door where a plaque should have been hung is empty, leaving only a faint trace.

Many withered vines climbed the top of the wall, shivering in the autumn wind.

The entire manor was quiet; there were no guards at the gate, and no lights were visible inside, as if it had long been abandoned.

But Cao Cao knew that Lady Ding was inside...

Cao Cao hesitated for a moment, walked to the door, raised his hand to touch the lonely and rusty door knocker, but then paused for a moment, withdrew his hand, took two steps back, looked left and right, and walked to the left along the gate.

This is the side gate.

There were obvious signs of people coming and going around the side gate.

Cao Cao raised his hand and knocked on the door.

No one responded.

Cao Cao waited a moment and knocked on the door again, but there was still no response.

Cao Cao tried to push the door open, only to find that the side gate was ajar...

He pushed open the door, which creaked dryly.

The walls of the courtyard were covered with moss, and weeds grew in the cracks of the bluestone slabs. One area near the hall seemed to have been recently tended to, with only some weeds visible, revealing the bluestone slabs themselves. However, further away, the area remained completely untouched, with weeds obscuring the bluestone slabs.

The main hall is located at the front of the courtyard, but the doors and windows are tightly closed.

To the left is a corridor leading to the inner courtyard.

There was a row of side rooms on the right, one of which had an open door, letting in a dim light.

An old servant, carrying a bucket of water, emerged from around the corner of the corridor. He looked up and saw Cao Cao standing in the courtyard, and was startled. His hand trembled, spilling some water from the bucket. He cried out urgently, "Who...who are you?!"

Cao Cao squinted, recognized the old man, and cupped his hands in greeting, "Brother Fu, it's me..."

"You...you...you..." The old man's eyes widened, as if he recognized Cao Cao. His hand involuntarily loosened, and the wooden bucket, filled with water, spilled onto the ground with a splash. "You...you...you're not..."

Uncle Fu seemed to remember something and stepped forward to bow, but Cao Cao hurriedly grabbed him, "Brother Fu... Madam, is Madam here?"

"Prime Minister...Prime Minister..." The old servant seemed unsure how to address Cao Cao.

Cao Cao shook his head, "Don't call me Prime Minister anymore... I'm no longer Prime Minister... I'm just a commoner... Just call me Cao Family Gentleman, as before..."

"How can this be... Your Excellency..." The old servant was at a loss, unsure of how to address him, caught in a dilemma.

"..." Cao Cao patted Uncle Fu's hand, then picked up the overturned bucket and asked, "Where is the lady? In the backyard?"

Uncle Fu looked at Cao Cao and hesitated before saying, "Then...Master...Madam, it seems...some people came a while ago, but Madam refused to see them..."

Uncle Fu swallowed hard, seemingly trying to read Cao Cao's expression. "Ah, not only the Cao family... even the people sent by your wife's brother are nowhere to be seen..."

Cao Cao could understand why he wouldn't see anyone from the Cao family, but he also wouldn't see anyone from the Ding family...

Cao Cao remained silent for a longer time before finally speaking to Old Uncle Fu, "Tell the lady...tell her that Cao Cao, the commoner from Qiao County, has returned home in poverty and has nowhere to go, and begs her to take me in."

It wasn't Prime Minister Cao, nor Cao Cao, but Cao Aman.

The old servant looked at Cao Cao, as if he wanted to say something, but in the end he said nothing, only nodded, "Please wait a moment, my lord..."

Cao Cao stood still and did not follow.

It seems they are awaiting a verdict.

Dusk had completely descended.

The last trace of crimson faded on the horizon, replaced by a deep indigo.

The stars began to appear sparsely.

The wind grew colder.

He put down his bundle, stood with his arms crossed, and looked down at the corridor leading to the backyard.

About the time it takes to drink a cup of tea...

Perhaps even longer, as long as a lifetime.

Time stretches out while waiting, and becomes viscous in memories.

Footsteps came from the other end of the corridor.

Cao Cao narrowed his eyes.

As people get older, their eyesight deteriorates significantly.

At first, all I could see were lights.

The figures were blurred and indistinct behind the lights.

The lantern's glow flickered, and Cao Cao could only see a dark blue skirt, white stockings, and a pair of blue cloth shoes behind the light...

The waves of memory surge forth.

That time, that day, that year...

The lights initially seemed to move very quickly, but slowed down when they actually saw Cao Cao...

As they drew closer, the light and shadow stopped about three or four zhang away from Cao Cao.

She held up the lantern.

The light then shone on their faces.

It illuminated him, and it also illuminated her.

The collagen in my memory has now turned into wrinkles of time.

Her once flowing black hair has now turned a mix of gray and white.

Only his shoulders and back remained straight, and his hair was still neatly combed.

Cao Cao's breath hitched.

Madam Ding was dressed in a simple, plain robe made of ordinary cloth, without any decorations, except for a blue trim on the cuffs and hem.

Her hair was tied up with a wooden hairpin, and she wore no other jewelry.

She had aged; her face and the corners of her eyes bore distinct lines, which, in the lamplight, resembled shattered porcelain, the lines penetrating deep into the body.

His temples were gray, looking like they were covered in frost under the lamplight.

Her lips were pressed into a straight line, neither red nor smiling. She simply stared calmly, as if looking at a complete stranger…

A familiar stranger.

He recognized her.

She held her head high, her expression indifferent, and said, "Prime Minister Cao, what brings you here?"

The voice was not loud, and it no longer had the crispness of its youth; only the blandness of reading from the account book remained.

It's a complete mess, with all sorts of old, trivial matters recorded in it.

For decades, for a lifetime, I will never forget.

Cao Cao opened his mouth, his Adam's apple bobbing, before cupping his hands and saying, "Greetings... Madam... I have come here unaccounted for, with nowhere to go, and humbly beg you... to take me in... I, Cao... humbly request your assistance..."

"You flatter me," Madam Ding replied almost immediately, the lantern swaying gently with her movement. "Hearing of Lord Cao's esteemed presence, I know my humble abode is unworthy of such a distinguished guest..."

Her gaze seemed to sweep quickly over Cao Cao's head and body, like a soft flower petal falling unintentionally. "...But it is late now, and there is still an empty room and a straw bed in the manor...If Lord Cao does not mind, please make yourself at home. Tomorrow...I will not see you off."

She was referring to "Lord Cao".

It is neither "Cao Mengde" nor "Cao Aman".

On the other hand, she was referring to "humble abode".

They were "distinguished guests," and "please make yourself at home," but a deadline was set: "I won't see you off tomorrow"...

Cao Cao felt as if something was stuck in his throat, which made him very uncomfortable.

Cao Cao wanted to say something, but his grand pronouncements were reduced to a short sentence.

He bowed and said, "Thank you...madam for taking me in..."

"I dare not accept Lord Cao's courtesy..." Madam Ding stepped aside and said to Uncle Fu, who had followed her, "Please take Lord Cao to the east wing of the side courtyard to rest..."

She spoke very calmly, and then gracefully departed.

"Yes, Madam." Old Uncle Fu bowed and accepted the order.

After Lady Ding left, Old Uncle Fu turned to Cao Cao with a complex expression. After a moment's hesitation, he said, "Lord Cao... Lord Cao, please come with me."

Lady Ding addressed Cao Cao as "Lord Cao," and Uncle Fu also changed his address to him.

Cao Cao didn't insist on using that form of address; he simply picked up the shrunken bundle from the ground and said, "Thank you for your trouble, Brother Fu..."

Cao Cao followed Uncle Fu all the way to the east wing, but didn't see many servants.

The glory days are over...

Cao Cao didn't ask why, because he knew why.

Looking back, the warm yellow lights had already disappeared into the depths of the corridor.

He didn't say why he came, and she didn't ask, but his constant references to Cao Xueqin created a distance between them, separating them considerably...

"Lord Cao, this way," Uncle Fu whispered a reminder.

Cao Cao withdrew his gaze and continued to follow the old man toward the side courtyard.

After passing through a moon gate, we arrived at the east wing.

This area is even more desolate than the front yard.

Regardless of the dynasty, people are always the most important, yet they are often overlooked.

Without people, no matter how much land or how large the estate, it will inevitably become ruins and disappear into the dust in the end.

Cao Cao raised his head slightly and looked at the thatched cottage in the east wing.

A "thatched cottage" is not necessarily a poor and desolate place with drafts coming through.

The thatched cottages of the gentry were made of three layers of rammed earth, with roofs thatched with white straw. If one were to be particular about them, they might be better than some of the earthen or wooden houses in the city. However, if no one lived there, or if they could not be repaired regularly...

Uncle Fu pushed open the door of one of the thatched huts, then groped around and lit an oil lamp.

Cao Cao immediately noticed the loom in the room and paused in his tracks.

The loom showed obvious signs of frequent use.

"In the east wing, there's only this room. The lady often comes here..." the old servant said. "Bedding and hot water will be brought over soon... I wonder if Lord Cao has had his evening meal? If you don't mind, I'll have someone bring some wheat porridge and pickles... If you need anything, just let this old servant know."

Cao Cao listened and sensed the distance in the words.

He's a guest...

They weren't even considered VIPs.

Cao Cao gave a slight wry smile, cupped his hands in a salute, and said, "Thank you for your trouble, Brother Fu."

"I dare not accept such praise," the old servant returned the greeting, then went out, closing the door behind him as if to make sure it was closed.

Cao Cao put down the bundle and looked around the room.

The room had a simple interior and exterior structure. The exterior space was relatively large, but it felt somewhat cramped after a loom was placed in the middle. The table had been moved to a corner, on which sat an oil lamp, its flickering light attempting to fill the space. The mats were old but clean; Cao Cao touched them and found little dust, indicating they were frequently used or regularly cleaned.

The inner room was even simpler, with only a bed, a table, and a wardrobe, which almost filled the room, and everything was kept very clean.

The bed was covered with a straw mat and a coarse blue cloth.

The coarse cloth was clearly hand-woven, with many obvious knots on its surface.

Cao Cao sat down by the bed, touched the coarse cloth, and then looked at the loom in the outer room.

The straw mat wasn't thick, so despite its softness, you could still feel the firmness of the bed.

Cao Cao stood up and his gaze fell on the cabinet.

After hesitating for a moment, Cao Cao stepped forward and reached out to open the cabinet door.

There were no valuables in the cupboard, just some bamboo slips and small bamboo baskets scattered around.

The bamboo slips seemed to have been untouched for some time, covered with a thin layer of dust.

Cao Cao casually pulled out a scroll.

The ropes binding the bamboo slips were somewhat rotten.

He carefully unfolded it, held it up to the oil lamp, and squinted at it.

It is the Book of Songs.

"The artemisia grows tall and luxuriant, but it is not artemisia, it is wormwood. Alas, my parents, who bore me with such toil..."

Cao Cao seemed to have been struck by something, and his whole body froze.

"This...this...this is..."

The handwriting on the bamboo slips is childish and the strokes are crooked, but it is clear that every stroke was made with great care.

The thick ink marks remain as clear as ever, even after many years.

At the end of the bamboo slip, there is a small signature...

hold head high.

Cao Ang!

Cao Cao's hand trembled slightly.

He finally remembered exactly where the familiarity of this house lay...

This is the house where Cao Ang lived back then!

Those long-buried memories surged forth, striking Cao Cao's soul!
When Cao Ang first began his studies, he often couldn't hold the pen steady and would spill ink everywhere.

When Cao Cao saw this, he couldn't help but scold her, but Lady Ding always patiently corrected him gently, "This horizontal stroke needs to be flat, relax a bit... Yes, just like that..."

Then Cao Ang gradually learned to write, and this poem was copied by Cao Ang later when he specially wrote it to celebrate Cao Cao's birthday...

Cao Cao was very happy when he received the bamboo slips, but he quickly threw them aside.

At that time, Cao Cao received many gifts.

Little did I expect that these bamboo slips would be kept here...

As Cao Ang grew up, he followed him into the army and became his most capable assistant.

after that……

And then it was gone.

Cao Cao closed his eyes, gently rolled up the bamboo slip, walked back to the inner room, put it back in its original place, remained silent for a moment, then opened the bamboo basket, rummaged through it, and took out a small wooden horse.

The wooden pony is only the size of a palm, crudely made, and has a broken leg.

This is Cao Ang in his youth.

It was Cao Ang's first decent work, and he treasured it dearly. However, Cao Pi secretly took it to play with and even broke a horse's leg in the process...

When Cao Cao found out, he only reprimanded Cao Pi, and then turned to Cao Ang and asked him to be humble, to act like an older brother, and not to be too calculative.

In Cao Cao's mind, Cao Ang was ultimately going to inherit the family business. Compared to the vast Cao family business, what was a mere wooden horse?
but……

Cao Cao suddenly felt a pang of pain in his heart.

He held the pony tightly in his hand, the sharp edges of the wood digging into his palm.

Footsteps sounded outside the door, followed by a deep knock. "Lord Cao..."

It's Uncle Fu, the old servant.

Cao Cao put the wooden horse back, closed the cabinet door, took a deep breath, walked back to the outer room, and opened the door.

Uncle Fu was carrying a simple food box.

Two servants followed behind him, carrying a large wooden barrel.

Steam rose and swirled from inside the wooden barrel.

"Please, Lord Cao... Lord Cao must be tired from your long journey, please rest early." Old Uncle Fu placed the lunchbox on the table, then directed the servants to put down the wooden bucket in the corner of the room. After hesitating for a moment, he gestured for the two servants to leave first, then said in a low voice, "Madam actually... actually, all these years, she has had this room cleaned..."

After saying this, before Cao Cao could react, Uncle Fu bowed and withdrew, closing the door behind him.

Cao Cao stood there, silent for a long time.

The meal was simple, but it wasn't the leftover wheat rice and pickles that Uncle Fu had originally mentioned. Instead, it consisted of two black flour pancakes and a bowl of fermented vegetable soup.

The black bread had clearly been reheated and appeared soft.

Cao Cao seemed to have thought of something and turned to look outside.

Outside the window, the night had become completely dark.

The stars multiplied, coldly adorning the sky.

A dog barked in the distance, once, twice, then silence returned.

The wind was still blowing, shaking the withered branches of the old tree in the courtyard, casting a shadow on the window paper that looked menacing.

Cao Cao stood there, gazing at the window shadows for a long time.

Then he turned around, sat down, picked up a steamed bun, and took a bite of the bun with a small sip of the soup, neither too fast nor too slow.

After finishing his meal, Cao Cao rinsed his mouth carefully, making gurgling noises, but instead of spitting it out, he swallowed it.

Then I took a cloth, soaked it in the slightly cooled water in the wooden tub, and slowly wiped my face and hands. I also took off my outer clothes to wipe away the dust from the journey.

He took off his outer clothes, blew out the oil lamp, went back to the inner room, and lay down on the bed.

The bed was indeed hard, and the bedding was thin; the chill of the autumn night seeped in from all directions.

He stared with his eyes open at the blurry outline of the roof beams in the darkness.

I haven't slept in a bed like this in many years.

When he was in the Prime Minister's residence, he slept on a large sandalwood bed, covered with a velvet carpet from the Western Regions, and covered with a soft Shu brocade quilt.

While imprisoned in Chang'an, he slept on an earthen kang (heated brick bed) with only a tattered mat and a straw quilt.

This bed is softer than the kang (heated brick bed) in the prison, but harder than the bed in the Prime Minister's mansion.

Just like his current situation.

In a daze, Cao Cao suddenly remembered the white hair he had seen at Lady Ding's temples earlier that day, and the calm, unwavering gaze she had cast upon him...

He also recalled a young girl from many years ago, when the peach blossoms were in full bloom, whose smile was even more radiant than the blossoms, asking, "And then what happens after we conquer the world?"

Cao Cao closed his eyes and muttered something under his breath.

The night was cold and long.

The nights to come may be different, or they may all be the same.

(End of this chapter)