Big Moon Ballad

Chapter 2685 Soul Search
Ying Baoyue sat on the hillside without speaking, looking up at the setting sun.

Her presence when silent is far more terrifying than when she speaks.

Li Ji and the little boy floating in the air looked at each other, both seeing fear in each other's eyes.

"What is there to be afraid of, you god?!" Li Ji shouted silently in his heart.

But the main responsibility for this matter still lies with him. He now has control over this body, and unless he loses consciousness, the Azure Dragon God will not interfere with his decisions.

Li Ji swallowed hard and looked at the woman on the hillside.

It was probably because he had just seen Lin Baoyue in the Azure Dragon God's memories that it stirred up his memories of Li Zhao.

Even though he has a different body, his back view when he's angry is exactly the same.

it's the same.

It's always been her, always has been her.

Li Ji walked behind Ying Baoyue, bowed his head sincerely, and said, "I was wrong, I'm sorry."

It was wrong of him to unilaterally sever the connection between the two of them.

Regardless of his purpose or predicament, from Ying Baoyue's perspective, he had disappeared without a trace since their parting in Guiyang, and his fate was unknown.

Li Ji offered no further explanation, only an apology.

Ying Baoyue turned around and stared into his eyes. "We're even."

"I abandoned you once, and you abandoned me once, so we're even."

Eight years ago, she left Li Ji in the cabin in the woods and walked alone toward her death.

Li Ji severed ties with her without her consent, so she really had no right to blame him, even though she had endured months of inner turmoil.

Li Ji was taken aback, then gave a wry smile, "I'm sorry."

He knew the pain of being abandoned, yet he made Ying Baoyue experience that pain.

The Azure Dragon God silently watched the two apologize and forgive each other, then suddenly spoke, "You searched your own soul?"

When He saw Ying Baoyue, He wondered how she had found this memory, until He noticed the pain deep in Ying Baoyue's pupils.

Only extreme pain could make her show this expression, pain that reaches the depths of her soul.

The Azure Dragon God suddenly understood what Ying Baoyue was doing.

She is searching for souls.

Lin Baoyue asked Him to erase her memories in her previous life to prevent Emperor Ying from searching her soul and finding her whereabouts, which shows that she knew the method of soul searching very well.

The Azure Dragon God never imagined that someone would search for his soul.

Regardless of whether it is possible, soul searching would bring immense pain to cultivators, akin to scraping bones and sucking out marrow, an unimaginable form of torture.

How could anyone do such a thing to themselves?

How could she do it herself?
How deep will she have to search to find this memory sealed by the gods? And at what cost will she have to pay?

It was excruciatingly painful.

The Azure Dragon God glanced at Li Ji and saw him standing frozen in place, his forehead instantly covered in cold sweat.

Li Ji probably never expected Ying Baoyue to do this.

"you……"

Li Ji's hands trembled uncontrollably. "Why did you..."

“I have no other choice,” Ying Baoyue jumped down the hillside and gently squeezed his wrist to stop his trembling. “I can’t find you anywhere.”

During the time Li Ji was missing, she used wind magic to search almost the entire continent, but to no avail.

Where else could she look?
"I can only look into my own soul."

She wanted to take a gamble.

Ying Baoyue had always felt, deep down, that there was an inexplicable connection between her and the Azure Dragon God, but this connection did not begin after she met Li Ji.

She herself didn't understand what this feeling was like, but perhaps the answer lay hidden deep within her soul, in a place even her own memories couldn't reach.

She finally found it.

In a very, very deep place, she herself did not know where she was, but she finally found it, that mark that was like a firefly.

When her consciousness touched that mark, a burning sensation from the depths of her soul enveloped her entire body.

If it weren't for her, even if someone searched her soul, they wouldn't be able to find this memory. The moment she touched it, she understood that it was a memory that had been forcibly erased, but she didn't want to forget it.

Her obsession left its mark at that moment.

It turns out that she and He had actually met at an even earlier time.

With this last imprint deep in her soul, she found Him.

Even though Ying Baoyue grabbed Li Ji's hand, he still couldn't stop trembling, "I'm sorry, I..."

Soul searching is very painful.

At this moment, Li Ji felt extremely guilty.

For a cultivator to search his own soul is no different from cutting himself open with a knife. He couldn't imagine the immense pain Ying Baoyue had endured, all because of him.

“It’s not your fault,” Ying Baoyue lowered her head and pressed her forehead against the back of his hand. “It was my own choice to remember.”

"No, it's all my fault."

Standing on the wasteland, Li Ji was almost overwhelmed by guilt. "It was me. I shouldn't have been born."

That wasn't a brand, it was a curse.

Because of her kindness, Lin Baoyue spared no effort to bring peace to the gods in her previous life, but suffered the backlash of Heaven for it.

His birth was a curse to her.

In her previous life, Lin Baoyue nearly lost her life to save him. She was reborn with great difficulty, only to encounter him again.

He almost killed her, mistaking her for Li Zhao's murderer.

What was he to her if not a curse?
None of this would have happened if He had not been reborn as a human and chosen to return to rest.

"It is because of my birth that you have been dragged into this cruel fate."

Li Ji's hands were as cold as ice.

"Why would you think that?" Ying Baoyue shook her head. "No, I am very grateful for your birth."

"Even if I could do it all over again, I would still choose to meet you."

Ying Baoyue reached out and hugged him. "I've thought like you before."

She also has someone like that.

“I once asked my master if she regretted meeting me,” Ying Baoyue gently stroked Li Ji’s hair, “and that was the same answer she gave at the time.”

Because he found her in the Cloud Mist Forest when he was fifteen, Lin Shubai's life changed drastically. He was expelled from his family, abandoned by the one he loved, and hunted down by cultivators all over the continent.

She had wondered if Lin Shubai regretted meeting her, and if he had ever thought about leaving her.

If only Lin Shubai hadn't met her.

Lin Shu-pai will have a peaceful and smooth life.

Even though Lin Shubai answered her that way, she had thought the same thing countless times in her past life.

But in this lifetime, the question that had troubled her all her life finally found an answer.

Ying Baoyue placed her hand on her heart, where Lin Shubai's lifeblood was beating.

“Ah Ji,” Ying Baoyue gently released Li Ji, looking up into his eyes, “I am willing to give my life for the one I love.”

"To me, you and Master are both like that."

Li Ji's dark eyes stared at her, moist and bright.

At this moment, he was no longer a cultivator who looked down upon the world, nor a god who roamed the continent.

He transformed back into that helpless, confused, and wounded little boy who ran into the misty forest.

“Aji”.

"Don't reject me, don't be afraid of me, don't..."

Ying Baoyue's body gradually became blurred, her true essence was almost exhausted, and she could no longer maintain this illusion.

"Hug the moon!"

“Aji,” Ying Baoyue said with a smile, touching his face as she finished speaking.

"do not leave Me."

In my opinion, this is a more solemn declaration of love than "I love you".