Harry Potter and the Great Old Ones

Chapter 540 The Weasley Joke Shop

Even though Mrs. Weasley disapproved of George and Fred's business, at this moment, she was like a child, staring blankly at the dazzling shop before her—

The display window on the left is filled with a dazzling array of products, including spinning tops, explosive tubes, flashbangs, bouncy balls, and screaming sticks.

The display window on the right was covered by a huge poster, in the purple color commonly used by the government, but decorated with flashing yellow lettering:

Life is too short
Come and have fun!
Mrs. Weasley seemed unable to reconcile the brightly lit shop before her with the small workshop that George and Fred had been tinkering in the Burrow.

Taking advantage of Mrs. Weasley's momentary daze, the group, led by Harry, entered the store. It was packed with customers, and Harry couldn't even get close to the shelves.

He looked around and saw the box closest to the ceiling: it was a flat snack box made at the end of the last semester.

Harry discovers that the nosebleed-inducing marzipan is the most popular, and there's only one opened box left on the shelf.

There were several boxes of wands for pranks, the cheapest of which would turn into rubber chicks or two pairs of underwear when they were waved.

The most expensive ones will attack the head or neck of unsuspecting users.

There are also many different kinds of quill pens, some that can refill their own ink, some that automatically check spelling, and some that can write fashionable answers.

There was an empty spot in the crowd, and Harry squeezed through the throng to reach that counter—

A group of 10-year-old children were watching a wooden figure slowly rise to the gallows. The box on it read: Reusable Executioner.

If you cast a spell on it, it will sway!

"Magic specifically for daydreaming."

Ginny managed to squeeze past a large display case near the counter and stood behind a box containing a colorful painting of a handsome young man and a rapt girl standing on the deck of a pirate ship, looking at some information.

“With a simple spell, you can have a high-quality, incredibly realistic, thirty-minute daydream, suitable for regular school classes and not easily detected. Effects include a blank expression and drooling. Not sold to anyone under sixteen. You see!” Ginny turned to Harry and said, “That’s really special magic!”

“Of course, sister,” Fred suddenly appeared and said, “Come here, Harry, I’m going to give you a special experience.”

“A truly unique experience.” Fred smiled mysteriously.

Harry left Ginny, who was captivated by the "reusable executioner," and followed Fred to the back of the joke shop—

There, Harry saw a table for playing cards and rope tricks.

“Muggle magic tricks,” Fred said excitedly, pointing to them. “For people with weird ideas like Dad, you know, those guys who love Muggles. It’s not very profitable, but the business is relatively stable. They’re great new stuff… Oh, here comes George…”

Fred's twin brother shook hands with Harry enthusiastically.

"Show him around? Come to the back, Harry, that's where we really make our money... the collection, you, and you'll have to pay more than a gold gallon!" George said, putting his arm around Harry's shoulder. Then, almost immediately, he noticed a little boy drawing something with his hand: edible Dark Marks—they could make anyone uncomfortable!
"Things here aren't free; you have to buy them if you touch them!" Fred added, shoving the Dark Lord's mark directly into the little boy's hand. "Especially this kind of food!"

After dealing with the little boy, George pushed aside a curtain behind the "Muggle Trap," and Harry saw a slightly darker but less cramped room. The products were packaged, making the shelves look much neater.

“We tidied them up to make them look neater,” Fred said. “And more interesting…”

“You have no idea how many people, even most of the Magical Union… can’t cast a decent protective shield spell except for Tiera,” George complained.

“Actually… we also find the protective hats a bit ridiculous, you know, you wear one and pick a friend to cast a spell on you, then watch their expression when the spell bounces off. But perhaps because of the hype surrounding the war, wizards in the magical world have already ordered at least five hundred from us! We have a huge order back in hand right now!” George said.

“Guess what? Quite a few foreigners even want to order these things from us,” Fred added. “They’ve tried a lot to cover it up, but their weird way of using words and phrases still gave them away.”

"Foreigners?" Harry asked in surprise, "The Magic Alliance?"

“I don’t know,” Fred said. “Of course, we’ve told Bill about it.”

“And then?” Harry asked.

“Bill, Tyrell, and Dumbledore all said so,” George said.

"Tierra said it's okay to sell, and he also hopes we can open up foreign markets."

"Then we developed new products such as protective cloaks and protective gloves..."

"Of course, they cannot block the Unforgivable Curse, but they can mitigate other moderately damaging spells..."

“We feel like we’ve made it into the vast world of fighting dark magic, it’s a really lucrative business,” George said enthusiastically. “Isn’t it cool? Look! This is quick-acting dark powder, we’re importing this stuff from Peru, it’ll be very convenient for you to use when you’re on the run.”

“Our trap detonators are slipping off the shelf, look!” Fred pointed to some strange-looking, horn-like objects that really did seem to be hurrying away. “You just need to sneakily throw one on the ground, and it will slip away to a place where you can’t see it and make a loud noise, making it easier for you to distract other people.”

"You export all of these?" Harry asked. "You export them to foreigners?"

“Of course not,” George and Fred said in unison. “We’ve only exported protective hats so far…”

“And we postponed the order by a month…” George said with a strange expression, “You know, it’s wartime now… We’re afraid these foreigners will use our products against us, but…”

“But Tierra is urging us to deliver the goods as soon as possible,” Fred said.

"Deliver as soon as possible?" Harry asked in surprise. "What do you mean by 'deliver as soon as possible'?"

“It means exactly what it says, and Tierra also said…” George said, “He also said…”

“Those foreigners get whatever they want, but these protective products can’t protect their fragile minds.”

(End of this chapter)