Why it never ends

Chapter 974: Eternal Ladder

Victoria was a little surprised: "Do you think you will regret losing this possibility when you are in your fifties?"

"That's the most annoying thing!" Stella laughed. "You turn around and ask her, 'What? Are you regretting it now?' She will just tell you, 'We are just talking about the possibility of disappearing' - after all, it's still my decision."

The two returned to the lobby, looked around in front of the electronic map, and finally decided to sit in the water bar on the basement floor.

"When you said 'possibility' you meant 'having a child', did I understand you correctly?"

"It's wrong, but it's not wrong," Stella fiddled with her hair on her shoulders, "Have I ever told you that I have a sister?"

"Yes, you said she also works in the AHgAs system."

"She not only works in the system, she is also a mercury needle, but she has never entered the combat sequence. I first learned about mercury needles from her... She just gave birth to her first child last year."

"Oh, congratulations."

"Do you know what shocked me the most about this?" Stella and Victoria sat at the bar together and took the soft drink order. "Some time ago, my sister told me that her father, my adoptive father, suddenly left her a message saying that he had been reading some parenting books recently and found them very inspiring, so he sent her a few copies."

"uh-huh."

"My sister was very surprised, because our father has never paid much attention to children's affairs. My sister said that she was thinking at the time, is it because of the close relationship between the generations that my father is willing to spend time on his grandchildren? But when the book arrived, my sister was dumbfounded - she thought it would be a reference book like "0-3 Years Parenting Encyclopedia". After all, this is her first time to take care of a child. How to coax the child to sleep? How to bathe? How to prepare complementary food... She almost tore apart the baby care book she picked.

"When I opened the package, my dad sent me a bunch of books on how to raise a self-disciplined child - it was obvious that he couldn't wait to be a dad again."

Victoria laughed in silence, still a little confused: "But what does this have to do with you?"

Stella smiled slyly: "How do you know that when I am fifty, I won't become a loser who can only find a sense of existence in babies? You know, it was after hearing this that I suddenly realized why my friends around me started to have children as soon as they reached a certain age. Children are really a good tool to solve the feeling of emptiness in life. Do you feel old? Do you feel that life is a bit stuck and you have lost the sense of progress? Let's have a baby for fun!"

Victoria's expression was twisted: "...Will you become that kind of person? It's hard to imagine."

"Nothing is unimaginable," Stella looked at her, "You think I can't?"

"will not."

"Hahaha, I don't think I will either," Stella looked forward, "but this is a problem. I've discovered a long time ago that the things that interested me in my twenties can no longer satisfy me. Even if aging hasn't come knocking on my door yet, it will come sooner or later... When that time comes, how can I fight my own death anxiety?"

"Don't you have to fight if you have a child?" Victoria said, "Even if you have a child, you will die anyway."

"But children are the eternal projection of their parents. Do you know that many elders in the Habitable Land start to urge the next generation to have children like crazy once they get old? Because they are old and they are afraid of death, so they have to hold living babies in their arms, as if they can see their own lives continue to exist in the world in another form."

"Oh," Victoria laughed meaningfully, "I smell it."

"Huh?" Stella sniffed around, "What do you smell?" "I smell anxiety." Victoria looked at her, "Stella, you are still so young, why do you torture yourself with these questions?"

"Young? I'm already over 30, and I haven't accomplished anything," Stella opened her hands. "I chose the wrong career. It's hard for a journalist to leave a name in history. Even if the news you catch is timely and explosive, who will care after a hundred years? Not to mention a hundred years, let's say in another fifty years, who will still remember the name Stella Clifford?"

“Is this important to you?”

Stella smiled faintly: "Whether a person admits it or not, as long as a person lives in this world, she will always try to grasp something eternal. For a species to continue, individuals need to continue to reproduce. This is something engraved in the genes and is not so easy to break free of. My sister grabbed her child, what about me? What can I grab?"

"It's strange," Victoria looked at Stella's profile, "I haven't thought about what you said-"

"Shut up! This wish is out of reach for me, but you've already realized it!" Stella punched Victoria's shoulder. "I've read your research on the pathogenesis of chelation disease - the good thing about you researchers is that as long as you produce results, your names will be forever included in the human knowledge base along with the papers. Your names will last as long as human civilization lasts. This is much safer than having a child!"

"It's not that exaggerated. When a power outage occurs—"

"If there is a blackout, your name will be more likely to be preserved." Stella drank the water in the cup in one gulp. "Victoria, you know, I came to District 12 for no other reason than to make a name for myself and go down in history. I came here to find my lifelong career. I want a ladder to eternity. No matter what method I use, I must grab it."

Victoria frowned slightly and looked at her friends beside her seriously and solemnly.

"Why here?" Victoria asked. "Why District 12?"

"Since this is Qianye's death place," Stella's eyes were bright and her voice was very light, "then it can also be mine."

A waiter passed by and after asking, he gently filled their empty glasses with ice water.

"Cheers," Victoria raised her glass to Stella, "I hope you can catch your ladder soon."

"Will do."

The two cups clinked together, making a crisp sound.

……

Another sunny day.

Early that morning, Rico drove Hesta out of town and the two went straight to the "Tavern of Two Women".

"When will you get your driver's license? It's been a long time."

"I've passed the road test, but I may have to wait a while for the license," Hesta lowered his head to sort out the documents, "It won't take more than a week at least - that's what Ximoya told me in her email yesterday."