When will I be the queen

Chapter 112 Self
"You couldn't eat so much when you were growing up." Cao Xin was afraid that she would eat too much.Hou Chang also felt that he ate a little too much, so Si Chen handed back the rice bowl, which was half a bowl of rice, "It's okay, she just eats a lot. It is inherited from the family. Her family's monthly food expenses are doubled, and everything is good enough to eat." Eating is good for your health.” The Cai family has longevity genes, but more than half of the women focus on childbearing
Wei Jiayan was very envious, "Cai Cai has a physique that is easy to lose weight, and she can still eat without gaining weight. She is so happy."

"It's okay if you don't control it after thirty." Cai Cai gnawed on the ribs, "Everyone in my family dare not eat too much after they are thirty."

"." Wei Jiayan didn't know what expression she still had, she hadn't had a few full meals since she was in her twenties.You don’t want to control until you’re over [-], and you still don’t dare to eat too much, it’s not satisfying
"Physique, physical quality, etc. are really born, and you can't raise what you were born with if you raise it the day after tomorrow. If you raise it hard, you will be damaged if you are not careful. Some people are blessed by nature. We are chefs, and many of them are fat, but In fact, there are thin people too, if you want to be a chef, you can still be thin, what a talent and a good physique." Hou Chang himself is a little fat, but he is still thin among chefs, but he still envies those chefs who are in good shape.

Cao Xin knew that Si Chen also ate grass, "It seems that you didn't inherit it."

Si Chen spread his hands, "No luck"

Let’s not mention the reaction of the outside world after the relationship between Cai Cai and Si Chen was exposed, and let’s not talk about the quarrel, Cai Cai was called cute and artificial, and Cao Xin was called straightforward and mean.Just talking about the dinner table really sparked a lot of discussion.

Cai Cai's alternative school scum, the pain of a school scum, the bull beep of a school bully, the sadness and strength of his easy-to-fat physique, and his unique physique. Many comments say that Cai Cai is really born to be an artist, Fortunately, I didn't listen to my family's objections and chose to quit the circle, otherwise it would be a waste of money.

The broadcast of variety shows will also allow people to get to know Cai Cai better, but at this time Mei Zhang is standing on the sidelines and has decided not to accept variety shows for Cai Cai within two years.It is better for an actor to keep a distance from the audience. It is best to be separated from the camera and the role.It's not a matter of mystery or not, but that Cai Cai's personal charm is too strong, and she is not very good at acting in variety shows, almost all of them are talking and doing things by herself.If the exposure is too much, people's strong personal impression of Cai Cai will become deeper and deeper, and then Cai Cai's acting path in the future will definitely be limited.

For example, if she wants to play a mathematician now, it will take a lot of effort. After two years, she will play it again, and it will be much easier
After dinner, Cao Xin was not teasing Cai Cai, and practiced the song "I Need You Every Minute" with her.After playing the original song several times, Cai Cai was able to sing it. This is really a very nice and lovely song.Cao Xin was completely fascinated, "How did you find such an old song?" He has never heard it, but such a good song, he should have never heard it, even if it is in Cantonese, he should have heard it. .

"My family listens to it." Seeing that Cao Xin really liked it, Cai Cai sang it to him again, without any affection, just enjoying singing and sharing good songs.

Cao Xin laughed, picked up the guitar and played along, humming the unfamiliar lyrics slowly, also in a cheerful and enjoying state.

Si Chen stood at the door with a drink in his hand, watching the two of them for a long time.Then I felt that I must be crazy. How could Cao Xin and Cai Cai look alike? They are completely different from appearance to personality.He came in after saying I’m coming, separated the two of them, let Cai Cai drink milk, “It’s about time for you to sleep.” Anyway, you’ve practiced well, go to sleep, and hurry up.

"I still want to play games for a while." Cai Cai asked in a low voice.

"No!!" How can you play games on the show! !
Well, Cai Cai took the milk, drank it in one go, and then went upstairs to sleep.I was planning to play games in a place without a camera
Cao Xin was annoyed that Cai Cai had to watch and listen to his manager from time to time during almost the whole process of recording the show.Then on the show, I made my relationship with Si Chen public, so I just listened to him. Taking care of her and taking care of her meticulously is one thing, but controlling and manipulating her is another. No wonder there are such rumors in the circle. In this live broadcast, it was beautified as dependence, which is not dependence, but manipulation
Cai Cai doesn't understand many things, such as what to say and how to do it in the show, it's okay to ask others.She's stupid, it's okay to protect her and not let her be cheated.But it can't be too much, right?The point is, Cai Cai doesn't think there's anything wrong with this at all, and even enjoys it
"You are such a good baby. You do what you are asked to do, and you really don't move when you are not asked to do anything. You are fifteen years old, not ten years old, not five years old. It's really cute that you do things like crying to your family members, and it's not too much in reality, but for a female artist who has been in the industry for five years, it's too much. Even if you know that you are not pretending or acting , but I still think you are so fake. You seem to be fake all over, aren’t you tired of living? Are you a marionette?”

"No, you are not a marionette. You are the living dead. Your whole body is framed in a crystal cover. Your family belongs to your company. They collectively form this cover. Do you think you will still be a living person? Do you really feel happy like this? Do you know what it's like to be free?"

When Cao Xin's expression changed, Mei Zhang and Cao Xin's manager asked the machine to be turned off, and the microphone stopped playing.The director wisely began to clear the scene and took the lead to leave.Following Cao Xin's opening, only Cai Cai, Cao Xin and Si Chen's managers were left on the scene.

Si Chen's agent was new, and the Tang family also found him. The previous one was completely evacuated by the company and Dai Sichen's mother.This is a veteran of Hong Kong City, and he also knows Mei Zhang. Before, he stood behind Mei Zhang and asked Mei Zhang to make decisions for the two children. Now, seeing Cao Xin convulsed, he stood up.

Cao Xin does not have a manager, and his parents are helping him with the manager's job. Several assistants work together as a manager's assistant. The one who stays with Cao Xin is the one who has been with Cao Xin for the longest time.It is known inside and outside the circle that Cao Xin's family requires too many things, and often dismisses the employees of the studio.This assistant was able to stay forever because of Cao Xin's protection.

The taste of freedom?
Cai Cai looked cold, "No one understands the taste of freedom better than me. What qualifications do you have, what qualifications do you have to judge and criticize me with your shallow experience? What qualifications do you have? I am the one who has been kind to you, I was tied up with you by capital, and you think you are qualified? Does your so-called freedom mean that you are still controlled by your parents after you become an adult? The taste of your so-called freedom is that you resisted your parents Manipulating you?"

"Do you think I'm being manipulated? Do you think I'm you?" Cai Cai looked at Cao Xin coldly, "Wake up, I'm different from you. Passive and active are different, don't you Do you know? What kind of life I want to live is my own choice and my freedom, but you, how many independent choices have you made since you were young? What is your freedom?"

"Your father, Mr. Cao Wenzheng, found me through my family and wanted to apologize to me personally. I said you have already told me. You know what your father said, he said he doesn't count."

Cai Cai looked at Cao Xin, who had an even more ugly face, mockingly, "Listen, listen with your own ears, your biological father said, he doesn't count. Even your apology, in your father's eyes, is nothing but bullshit! !"

"Are you talking to me about the taste of freedom now? Are you worthy?"

"Ninny." Dai Sichen held Cai Cai back and stopped talking.
Cai Cai has only been so harsh to three people in his life, Mu Niannian, Er Ya, and Cao Xin in front of him.Cai Cai couldn't tell what mood she was in at the moment, she knew she shouldn't provoke Cao Xin so sharply, but she just couldn't help it when faced with his accusation.
Before going to another world, she was raised in this world as the shadow of Mu Niannian. She was isolated from the world for thirteen years, and her literacy was only based on script lines.She has no name or surname, even though the TV dramas she acted in are broadcast on TV, but the name people recognize is Mu Niannian, not her.And in another world, she no longer needs to be controlled by others, but she was born unhealthy. She hasn't left the nursing home for eighteen years and stays in the ward all year round.Even with her mother's love, she is still lonely.Still isolated.

This period of more than [-] years of isolation has had a huge impact on her so far. Even if she now has so many family members and so much love, it is still difficult to erase the [-]-plus years of time in her life. Physically and mentally, the imprint of falling.

She is used to being alone.She is used to being a useless person.She is used to everything being managed by others.She is used to not using a mobile phone or any communication tool.She is used to playing by herself to amuse herself.

The difference is that in the past she was forced, but now she is active.It sounds sad and pitiful, and the difference seems small, but Cai Cai knows how big the gap is, and how much hardship she has experienced before she can calmly face all her habits.

She realized one thing. What she wanted to do was never to forget the past, to turn herself into another person, to have another way of life. What she wanted was to control her own life and choose to make herself Happy lifestyle.So what if it's a habit from the past?As long as she is happy.

Cai Cai heard a word from the psychiatrist to reconcile with herself.She doesn't know what the professional explanation is, but in her understanding, she accepts everything in the past completely and honestly, and doesn't let herself become another self. She is very happy, and this is reconciling with herself.

She even thinks she's amazing
I'm so amazing, but in the end, you actually said that I'm not a real person
"I thought you understood me." Cai Cai felt really uncomfortable. If anyone said these words, it's not even that no one said such words. She wouldn't feel so uncomfortable
It happened to be Cao Xin, who made her realize another kind of artist, let her put aside her prejudice, let her see sincerity and kindness, and let her open her heart and want to be friends with him seriously. Cao Xin said that she is not a real person.
This hurt too much.
Cai Caichang is so old, this is the first time he stumbled in making friends.Because the friends she made sincerely with each other gave her the same sincerity and affection in return, Hong Hong, Lily, Sarah. The first one said that she almost threw her into the river, and the latter two were once enemies. But she still became good friends with them.In the end, it was Cao Xin who made her feel unsure. He obviously responded with the same kindness, but it was not the kind she could accept. On the contrary, he hurt her so much.
Even if you are well-intentioned, even if your intention is good, but you don’t understand me, your bad words hurt me, and I’ve fed my sincerity to the dog
Cai Cai left directly.Instead of taking a break, she asked Mei Zhang to find her a place to live nearby. Mei Zhang settled the production side with another work arrangement, and then stopped Fang Qiao and Zhou Qing from disturbing Cai Cai, "Let She'll be alone for a while." Cai Cai's attitude towards Cao Xin is indeed unusual
Thinking of the instructions from the Tang family, Mei Zhang didn't think too much, and called Cai Jinhui directly to repeat what happened just now.

Cai Jinhui only said one word and hung up the phone.

Mei Zhang and the Tang family and the Cai family have suggested several times whether to change the way of teaching Cai Cai, but each time they received severe criticism and opposition.Until one time, Feng Shilan told him in private that it was not a trivial matter that Cai Cai did not remember before the age of eight.She even said that she had been to another world.A child who has seen death and the other side, how could they let go. If they let go a little bit, they might lose this child, so they would rather bear the stigma of being a control freak than keep this child.

Fortunately, the child does not object to such treatment, and even accepts it willingly and enjoys it.This is life.

After that, no matter how worried Mei Zhang was, she dared not mention it again.For example, before Cai Cai wanted to imitate foreign artists and set up a frank character, he was so worried and hesitant that he didn't tell the Tang family, and he still chose to protect Cai Cai.

As long as Cai Cai is happy, healthy and alive, nothing else matters.

Now Mei Zhang also understands that when they need to change, it is when Cai Cai wants to change.Rather than the kindness of others in a few words.
Cai Cai is not a fool, nor is he stupid at all.Instead, she's really smart and perceptive.She knows what she wants, so she has been very determined to walk her own way.They were just cooperating with her and protecting her, not obstructing and manipulating her.Outsiders can't understand, it doesn't matter at all.Cai Cai always doesn't care
However, Cai Cai now cares that Cao Xin can't understand
Dai Sichen didn't go after Cai Cai, but stayed and sat beside Cao Xin.

(End of this chapter)