death of hope

Chapter 1037 "Psionic Storm" (110) The Abandoned Medal

I tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep.

I might as well throw off the covers, get up, and take a walk around.

Wearing pajamas, Li Ang sat on the edge of the dormitory rooftop, his legs dangling in the air through the railing.
A cigarette dangled from his lips, and a chilled can of Blue Ribbon beer sat beside him.
My mind has gradually calmed down and become more peaceful, unlike the restlessness I felt the night before.

Looking up at the dazzling Milky Way, it now seems that all the stars in the sky pale in comparison to the fleeting blink of Yuna's eyes.
This is not a foolish infatuation, but a sudden awakening.

Li Ang plans to do something.

A major event
A very dangerous, self-defeating, and foolish decision.

This decision means saying goodbye to the most glorious and proudest memories, saying goodbye to the past self, and at the same time searching for the younger version of oneself.
Let go of some maturity and sophistication, and rediscover some straightforwardness and innocence.

·
Leon saw a pure white moth, an ancient species brought to the new Sapporo colony by the first colonists to improve the ecosystem and pollinate the flowers.

Attracted by the light, the moth flew towards the high-powered light bulb on the rooftop. It was immediately scorched by the intense heat, emitting black smoke, and fell to the ground. It fluttered its wings a couple of times and then lay still.

Li Ang watched all this silently, his thoughts drifting back to the past;

·
As a noble family of human knights with a long history in Terra, the Vilnius family has a glorious past, with countless heroic legends created by their ancestors.

Li Ang grew up listening to these stories told by his nanny, and he wanted to become one of the heroes.
Even the lowest-ranking servant in the luxurious Earl's mansion would involuntarily straighten his chest when the glory of the Vilnius family was mentioned.

The teachers at the aristocratic academy often took their students to visit the Ikers Colonial War Museum, telling the children about the origins of those rusty rifles and tattered breastplates, and how the Vilnius family produced many heroes in that era of martial spirit.

Growing up in such an environment, Li Ang possesses extreme loyalty and love for his hometown of Iks and yearns to prove himself.

To prove that he was worthy of the noble surname 'Vilnius'.

He succeeded, proving himself superior to the Earl's spoiled and foolish sons. Moreover, he earned the recognition of professionals from all walks of life in Isk.
He has made significant achievements in politics, military affairs, and art, and is the youngest champion in the arena—a hardworking genius.

·
After a certain day, everything took a sharp turn for the worse.

After his identity was revealed, he felt ashamed of the tainted bloodline of his illegitimate child.
Li Ang finally understood that none of this had ever belonged to him, and all his efforts had been in vain.

Rejecting mediocrity, Li Ang embarks on a turbulent self-imposed exile, determined to prove himself in an ancient way, to build a great enterprise from scratch, and to reclaim what has been taken from him.

But the price...

What will be the cost?

·
Countless days and nights, Liu Ang's ears were filled with the sounds he heard most often at work, sounds that kept him up at night and unable to eat or sleep.
Deep within the psionic research institute, those poor souls who were contained (imprisoned)...

Their mournful prayers and wails did not bring them peace even in death; they were made into specimens for continued research.

The young hero who once fought against alien pirates to protect humanity now plays a less-than-honorable role, resembling a jailer in a medieval Z-cult inquisition. Psionic security expert Leon Vilnius is an outstanding employee of the institute.

He carried a stick and a whip, with the keys to his handcuffs and shackles on his waist. He colluded with those cold-blooded psionicists, his hands stained with the blood of innocent people, and at night he always felt that there were wronged ghosts weeping in the dormitory.

(The blood and tears of the innocent keep me awake at night. Is this really what I want?)
How many more sins must one commit to return to Ix and inherit the title?

This is me, Leon Vilnius's true self;

A heartless, greedy demon?
·
Whether it was the strong wind, the lack of clothing, or the ice-cold beer, Li Ang shivered.
He picked up a Blue Ribbon beer can, gulped it down, stuffed the still-burning cigarette butt into the can's opening, and squeezed it flat into a ball with his palm.
With a powerful swing of his arm, he threw the object accurately into the trash can downstairs; his throwing accuracy was something he honed from playing baseball as a child.

Li Ang stood up, dusted off the dirt on his trousers, and took out his most treasured item from his pocket. It was made of precious metal, with superb craftsmanship and inlaid with gemstones. The date of his award was engraved on the back, and two short red and black silk ribbons extended from the fine gold brooch.

A Vilnius-class Hero of the Oak Leaves and Diamond Cross Medal of Courage.

That was the highlight of Li Ang's life, achieved as a naval commander in the fight against the Enchantress Pirates, a victory earned at the cost of blood and sweat.

I never wear it except on important occasions; I keep it in a thickened, sealed plastic bag to prevent oxidation and maintain it with oils.
Even after his illegitimate child status was revealed and he was exiled, he still kept him by his side and treasured him. Even in the most desperate times, he never thought of selling him at a pawnshop.

During his destitute vagrant life, whenever he was hungry, cold, or looked down upon, and felt disheartened, just one glance at this treasure would give him renewed courage and rekindle his ambition to return home in glory.

·
Every time Li Ang looks at this medal, he can't help but smile.

That parade was truly magnificent. The citizens of Iksh, the city's most popular city, cheered and lined the streets to welcome him. Streamers, flags, and flower petals fluttered from the buildings along the way. Soldiers saluted him, and young girls blew him kisses…

As the parade reached its climax, when Count Dominique Vilnius, Li Ang's uncle and dressed in a marshal's uniform, pinned his gleaming medals to his chest, the hundreds of thousands of people present cheered.
People at that time had no doubt that this young hero would inherit his uncle's earldom, lead the Vilnius family, and lead the Ix colony toward a prosperous and powerful future.

·
Now, Li Ang held the sealed plastic bag, gazing at the well-preserved gem medal inside, which shone brightly under the starlight.

A wave of nausea washed over me, and I felt like there was sticky brain matter and intestines on it...

Li Ang had witnessed far too many of the shady dealings and gruesome live vivisections within the research institute… far too many…

Driven by dreams, by the desire to return to their hometown, by the pursuit of titles, they turned a blind eye to everything, and over time, they became numb...

But everything changed after he entered Area B14, joined Project Zero, and fell in love with that blonde girl.

Rather than saying that Li Ang was awakened by love, it would be more accurate to say that he rediscovered the most precious thing from his youth.
A heart that has not yet been tainted by the adult world, a heart that is straightforward and sincere.

·
The next morning,

In the silt at the bottom of the scenic lake in the residential area,
A rusty bicycle, punctured tires, used condoms, a chair with a broken leg—a treasure was hidden among a pile of trash at the bottom of the lake.
That was a priceless Vilnius-class Hero Oak Leaf Diamond Cross Medal of Courage, enough to buy an entire building in this neighborhood. Such a treasure, and now it lies submerged in the lake, soaking in fish droppings and silt.

Perhaps one day, a lucky scavenger will find this item and become an overnight millionaire.

But that nouveau riche will never know what was buried with that medal;
A legendary tale of a young hero from Ix, who once had the opportunity to become the Count of Vilnius, but for some unknown reason gave it up.