clown game

Chapter 140 (non-text - I haven't written it for a few days, write a few strokes to find my feeling) the short story of the containment - the prisoner of love

"I love you."

In her sleep, she murmured softly, her voice full of love and exhaustion.

Sunlight penetrated through the curtains, surrounded by a faint scent of wine that had not dissipated.

With the faint morning light, I opened my eyes and listened to her soft snoring again.
"Uh" I rubbed my head and let out the groan that all hangovers make.

This is the early morning of the second day at her house, and the first day... I was completely soaked in wine.

No way, the first time I came to her hometown, "wine" is indispensable no matter what.

The sound must have disturbed her, the snoring stopped suddenly, she pulled the quilt in a daze, and opened her eyes.

I met her eyes.
Beautiful, confident, kind, and careful. I am glad that I can marry such a woman. In my 20 years of life knowledge, this is undoubtedly love.

"Woke up early," she said, looking at me.

"Well, I drank too much, I woke up early." As I said, I picked up a glass of water by the bed and drank it.

She always prepares a glass of water by the bed. As I said before, she is very careful.

Suddenly, I felt a little weird! !
"Ahem." I was choked by this sudden awareness and coughed.

She sat up and patted my back.

"Slower."

She said with some worry.

These two words exploded in my ears like thunder. I turned around and opened the curtain behind me hesitantly.
Seconds later, a sparrow flies past the window
And my body was shaking involuntarily!

Immediately afterwards, I got dressed and rushed out of the room.

She may have been frightened by my inexplicable behavior, she didn't say anything for a while, just stared blankly on the bed!

I ran to the street in a panic, and saw the yellow Jetta passing by, the old lady chasing the bus, and the girl wearing knee-high barrel socks
My mind seemed to be blown apart, like being continuously bombarded by continuous mortar fire!
No matter how hard I dare to believe it, I have to believe this unbelievable situation.

All of this is exactly the same as yesterday!

I live in a small city where I have to search for a long time on the map. I live a life that I don’t like and can’t escape. Three years ago, I met her and fell in love.
Right now I'm drinking.In the north, family members always drink when they see their wives.

This is my 12th, maybe 13th time sitting in this position.

In the same environment, they speak the same words, even the wine tastes the same
I've been through the same thing over and over

The spicy liquid crossed my throat, and I was drunk again.

She took the cup for me worriedly again, and drank it down for me amidst the noise of the crowd
I know. She never drinks.

But this glass of wine, she has drunk it for me many times

In the room, I looked at her flushed cheeks from choking

She was like this yesterday, right? What will she say next? ?
I forgot.
'Cause I'm drunk this time of day

"You look tired"

She stared at me worriedly and said.

"Uh" I hiccupped and didn't answer.She should have said this to me yesterday too.That must be the case, and nothing has changed about what happened anyway.I don't know why at this moment, I don't have any desire to talk, anyway, tomorrow, everything will return to the original point.
She was still looking at me, as if she still said something?But I didn't hear it. Alcohol confused my vision, and her face gradually became blurred. For a moment, I seemed to feel that there were many things in her eyes.

"You'll never understand!"

I yelled drunkenly, pushing her away,
How I wish that tomorrow would be a new day, or maybe all of this was just a dream. "If it's a dream, let it end quickly." I prayed, fell down on the bed, and fell into a deep sleep.

"I love you"

The same morning light, the same tone,

For me, this is a more cruel declaration than death, which means that I will be imprisoned in this day forever!
There is no past, no future, just this never-ending cycle.

I walk out the door like a ghost, yellow Jettas passing by, old ladies chasing buses, teenage girls in knee-high barrel socks
And I'm just a lonely traveler. In the long river of years, I will always be alone. Forever.

"Why don't you just kill me?" I inexplicably burst into a smile, and after a moment of spreading, I couldn't hold back anymore, laughing wildly on the street like a madman.

i am smiling
I hammered the ground with my hands and attracted the sideways glances of countless pedestrians. They covered their mouths and looked at me with an idiot expression. "Then come on, come on, haha." I couldn't hold back the overwhelming helplessness and loneliness in my heart, and staggered insanely to find a strange street.

I am a lonely traveler.

Since then, my life has been just wandering around the city doing nothing.I don't have to worry about my livelihood, and I don't have to worry about tomorrow's hardships. In this case, let me be a ghost of time.I forgot how long it was, how many scenery I had seen, and how many indifferent strangers I passed by.Day after day, I was lost in the maze made of steel and concrete, wandering, like a third party unrelated to the world, watching the growth and destruction of the world in a day.I gradually feel that this eternity seems to have become my destination.

No, I can't just be trapped like this

i can't take it anymore

So

I decided to try death

----

i wake up again

"I love you"

she is still talking
I was taken aback by a ghost

It suddenly occurred to me how many times has she said "love me"?

So I turned my head and looked at her,
And she slowly opened her eyes and looked at me,
It was still the same gaze, never changing.

"You seem tired," she said worriedly.

Suddenly, my heart was suddenly clenched.

"Yeah, I'm tired, the kind of tiredness you can't even imagine."

"Just look at your eyes." She said with some worry: "Tell me about it."

"You won't believe it."

"I believe in you." She looked at me seriously

Without warning, without even realizing it, a tear fell from my eye socket.I wiped my eyes and looked at my palm in surprise.

It turned out that I was so eager to talk to others about this loneliness.

When I touched her concerned eyes, it was as if some emotion in my heart had burst the embankment, rushing out violently.

I told her everything and she listened quietly with her hand on my shoulder the whole time.

I put on clothes that fitted me again, although I can't remember how many cycles ago I last wore them, and she pulled out the collar tucked in for me.

In the mirror, I can see her smiling at me.

On the wine table. Those are the same people, those words, those wines, but I am different.

I don't want to drink today

I know, this is not in line with the customs in the north, but it doesn't matter anymore, I want to spend more time with her instead of turning myself into a drunk.

In the garden of the community at night, there are some stars in the sky

"I don't know if it will be a cycle tomorrow." She asked with a calm smile.

"Sure it will be," I said, shaking my head.

She stared at me and said. "On the bright side, maybe we are not ready for tomorrow, God gave us some time."

"Give me some time to prepare?"

"Yes." She raised her eyebrows, her black hair swaying gently in the wind, "everyone will have such a moment when they feel that they can't walk anymore, and they are afraid that tomorrow will come, so they should stop before walking."

"Then what am I afraid of?"

"love me."

I looked at her eyes that were looking at me seriously,

Tears welled up in her eyes, besides love, there was a kind of anticipation

"we????"

In an instant, it seemed that her eyes at this moment overlapped with the eyes she saw when she was drunk countless times before reincarnation.

Is she like me?
Suddenly, my brain seemed to be hit hard again, and I couldn't even stand still.
I finally remembered what she said softly to me after being drunk countless times, but I chose not to pay attention to the words
"I'm waiting for you"

(End of this chapter)