Harmonious home

Chapter 17 The stormy home
The weather suddenly turned cold, and the wind outside made the door of the rental house shake and creak, as if the entire roof would be blown over at any time. A gust of cold wind blew in through the crack in the door, and I shivered and hurried I got into bed and saw Dabao sleeping soundly. I fell into deep thought. What year and month is this? !Is it possible that I will follow in the footsteps of my parents and have to live outside all the time?Just as I was thinking about it, Xiao Yang patted me on the shoulder and said, "Xiaolan, let's go back and get married!" "Get married?" I sat up from the bed with a swish, and then said, "What kind of knot are you doing? With your family's background, I Can Mom and Dad agree?" Xiao Yang scratched his head and said awkwardly: "Well, this is indeed the case... Then you see that our son is almost one year old, so we can't keep avoiding you like this, right?" I thought about it. After a moment, I suddenly felt a little regretful and said to him excitedly: "No! I haven't thought about getting married yet. Besides, we are so poor now. How can we register Dabao with a certificate? No way, your father and mother I don’t have any money, and my parents won’t give it... Oh, why are there so many things? I regret having a baby with you. If I had known this, I should have jumped into the river..." Xiao Yang covered his head My mouth comforted me and said: "Stop talking, I know this is all my fault, don't get excited, I will find a way to deal with it, don't worry."

As I was talking, there was a knock on the door, and I vaguely heard someone calling my nickname. I jumped up from the bed and said happily: "Dad, it's my dad here." Xiao Yang I hurriedly ran to open the door and took the things from my dad's hand. He greeted me shyly, "Dad, you're here." My dad nodded, looked up and down at our rental house, and said, "Xiaolan, you're used to living here." "?" I nodded with tears in my eyes and didn't know what to say. My dad patted my shoulder and said, "Just get used to it, get used to it. Where is the child?" Xiao Yang quickly picked up Dabao and showed him. My dad I looked at Dabao who was sleeping soundly, handed me a big red envelope and said, "This is for the child. I bought some chickens and put them at the landlady's house. You are not in good health after giving birth, so you need to take some supplements." He nodded and said, "How are you, little brother? Is the factory busy enough?" "Yes, we have been away for more than a year, and I am too embarrassed to go back to see you." My dad sighed and said, "Everyone I blame myself for being too self-righteous and ambitious. I didn't listen to my eldest daughter's dissuasion and insisted on building a beverage factory and a return air furnace factory. However, due to poor management, the capital turnover was difficult, I lost a lot of money, and something happened at the construction site. Now, The Steel Door and Steel Window Factory is also in a recession, and it may not be able to sustain it for long. Your little brother follows me wherever I go, and there is no place for him to live. Your mother still refuses to forgive me for coming out to look after him..." After hearing this , I felt a little guilty. After taking a closer look at my dad, I saw that he was much haggard and older, and his temper was not as bad as before, but much gentler. Xiao Yang and I comforted him and promised to help take care of him in the future. Before leaving, Xiao Yang Yang Cai told him about our plan to get married, and he nodded without saying anything.

Seeing the back of my father's departure, I felt mixed feelings in my heart, and I felt that the harmonious homeland I hoped for since childhood seemed difficult to achieve. Now my father and mother have been fighting for half a lifetime and can't get back together. I got married without a certificate and gave birth to my baby. These double shackles suddenly made me feel a little difficult...

Faced with the situation, Xiao Yang and I returned to our hometown to register for marriage in 1995. One year after our marriage, I became pregnant and gave birth to a daughter. Although my life was not rich, looking at our two well-behaved children, I felt unspeakable emotions in my heart. Helpless and a little sad.I feel like my life is like a nightmare, and I am obsessed with it and can never get rid of it.Leaving aside the misfortune of my childhood, my father’s misunderstanding and insults first led me to run away from home and choose to live with Xiao Yang. We illegally lived together and gave birth to our son Dabao. Now, in order to provide Dabao with a household, I had no choice but to marry Xiao Yang, a poor family member. Money is needed for food, clothing, housing and transportation. In order to save money, Xiao Yang and I had a great contrast in culture, personality and views. He was generous with money, while I was stingy with money. We started to change from the original Our love gradually turned into violent quarrels. I even regretted impulsively marrying a husband who I couldn’t get along with in every aspect. My frequent regrets and secret tears became a lingering knot in my mind and a nightmare.Seeing the dilapidated tile-roofed house and a pair of children who were crying for food, I felt very guilty and blamed myself for giving birth to them ignorantly and impulsively but unable to give them a healthy life and a good growth environment.The cruel truth tells me that I have to pay for my impulsive mistakes and I cannot let innocent children bear the bitter fruit I brewed. I have to be responsible for them.My mother-in-law is old, and my stepfather makes a living by going to markets and setting up street stalls. He can't afford to pay the fine for my son (Dabao). Three married brothers and sisters-in-law have their own families and children. It's even more difficult. After thinking about it, , my husband and I discussed and decided to get a bank loan to open a small shop at home, so that I could do some side business and earn some money while taking care of the children.In this way, we used local materials, dug a wall and opened a window to open a small shop in our dilapidated house near the roadside. Before dawn, we started to learn farming with my husband, how to raise chickens, ducks, and pigs. Preparing and feeding feed for cats, dogs, rabbits, etc., is a busy day all day long, and there are endless things to do. It is like a marathon and cannot stop for a moment. Sometimes even the most basic things such as eating, dressing, etc. Daily washing was a mess, there was no normal washing routine at all. One moment my son pooped and he wiped his butt, another moment his daughter peed and changed her pants, another moment pigs, cats, dogs, rabbits and ducks squealed when they were hungry, and now people came to the store to buy something. Things, etc. In short, I was so exhausted from all the busy work that I almost had no time to rest day and night.When Mu Ran looked back, I was no longer the young girl with yearning for life, but a young woman who was strong as a mother and experienced many vicissitudes of life.

(End of this chapter)