The Pacifist Necromancer of Hogwarts

Chapter 344 Eavesdropping
Whatever the school rules say, they probably don't apply to Aurors - especially a powerful Auror who is glaring at you with disapproval.

Even Filch seemed a little scared of Mad-Eye's ferocious appearance. He walked away mumbling unwillingly, without mentioning things like "hanging from the ceiling by the ankles" or "locked in a cabinet full of spikes".

"Bah!" Mad-Eye grumbled in disdain. "Sneaky little fellow!" He stared after Filch, his other eye darting rapidly in its socket. Anthony wasn't sure if that meant he was going to roll his eyes.

"It's not the first day you've known him, Alastor." Kingsley said, pulling out his pocket watch and looking at it. "We should leave."

Mad-Eye sneered, "I didn't like him from the first day I met him. You know, this means something..." He turned his magic eye and looked at the several suits of armor against the wall suspiciously.

At this moment, with a creak, the door of the classroom next to them opened. Umbridge's artificial, coquettish voice floated out from the crack of the door. Mad-Eye showed a mixture of disgust, vigilance and excitement, as if he was holding a slipper close to a fly resting on the window.

"You'll receive a report on this investigation after we see the results of the OWLs and NEWTs... Oh, and there will also be a summary report of all investigations, dear." The gap widened slightly, and a few stubby fingers with rings rested on the inner door handle. "But I must say, I'm afraid the results will not be very good. We are sorry to find that throughout the investigation, you have not adjusted your teaching according to the feedback at all."

"Alas, Dolores," said Lockhart's voice, "that is a most unjust accusation! You must know that I am always ready to listen to good advice..."

Umbridge interrupted softly, "Well, I hope you've realised the consequences of ignoring that advice. I'm looking forward to this year's Defence Against the Dark Arts pass rate. I'm sure it will serve as a warning to the other professors."

She opened the door and walked out with an uncomfortable, smug smile on her face.

Her contented expression faded when she saw Scrimgeour, Mad-Eye, and Kingsley, but then an even more false smile appeared on her face.

"Rufus? How good to see you here. Of course, I wasn't expecting - Oh, Kingsley!" She looked around in mock surprise. "Why, Mr. Moody too! What happened?"

Mad-Eye did not reply. Scrimgeour gave a dry smile. "It is the thing you know, Umbridge. Well, very well. We are off now. See you at the Ministry."

"Oh, that matter," said Umbridge, tilting her head slightly in suspicion. "But if it comes to anything at Hogwarts... You know I'm the High Inquisitor, don't you? You can always ask me -"

"Henry!" Lockhart said happily, squeezing out from between Umbridge and the door frame. "It seems that you have already supervised the Defence Against the Dark Arts OWL, right? Those little guys did well, right? Haha, of course you can't expect them to fight against a whole group of volebbats alone like I did, but as long as they use those little tricks right, they should be able to leave a deep impression on the examiner..."

Anthony reminded, "The practical exam is in the afternoon, Professor Lockhart."

"Of course I know." Lockhart frowned. "What's wrong with you, Henry? You don't think I would forget the students' exam time because I'm too busy? Then you underestimate me! Of course, others may find it unimaginable what I have to deal with... writing books, answering letters, declining interview invitations, providing assistance to anxious new adventurers, answering difficult questions about Defense Against the Dark Arts sent from all over the world, and preparing students for exams... But for Gilderoy Lockhart, this is just a piece of cake. You really should have seen me in Bulgaria..."

"We really need to go," said Scrimgeour.

Umbridge said immediately: "Let me take you out."

Scrimgeour hesitated, but Umbridge had already made an irresistible gesture and walked up to him. Kingsley nodded to Umbridge and followed Scrimgeour. Mad-Eye limped after him, his magic eye still scanning the castle with distrust.

Anthony followed, pretending that he had just wanted to go outside the castle for some fresh air, hoping that Lockhart would give up his intention of going with him because of Umbridge's presence - Mad-Eye glared at him fiercely several times - but Lockhart spoke louder and more excitedly, as if he wanted Scrimgeour to come over and listen to what he was saying to Umbridge.

"...Alas, I cannot bear to think of such a miserable scene..."

Kingsley slowed down his pace slightly and walked side by side with Mad-Eye. "Did you find anything noteworthy?"

"If you hadn't met me..."

As if he thought Anthony couldn't hear them in this situation, Mad-Eye complained in a low voice: "It's everywhere. Weird statues, impenetrable walls, translucent rooms, messy pipes, cabinets full of garbage... That's why I hate coming to Hogwarts. I've long advised Albus to clean up this castle..."

"…What else could I do? I couldn't just ignore this, so I drew my wand…"

Kingsley asked, "Can you see his office?"

"We don't have what we're looking for," said Mad-Eye.

"…I only used a simple spell. Simple, but effective…"

"I mean the one next to it," Kingsley said. "Defense Against the Dark Arts." Mad-Eye stopped walking. As he and Lockhart, who was talking loudly, passed by the two of them, Anthony couldn't help but look back. Mad-Eye's normal eye was slightly closed, and his magic eye was turned up, as if he could see through the ceiling and see what was happening upstairs.

Suddenly, Mad-Eye opened his normal eye and stared at Anthony: "What are you looking at?" The electric blue evil eye also turned back quickly.

"Nothing," Anthony said, and hurried away while Lockhart described how he had pushed that unfortunate unknown Dark creature—Anthony didn't even catch its name—into the sink.

"Of course, Rufus, I will tell the Minister," said Umbridge in a coquettish voice. "I am planning to go back and discuss my findings with him next Monday."

She had no intention of lowering her voice. Either she didn't care if anyone heard her, or she also thought that no one around Lockhart, who kept talking all the time, could hear what she was saying.

If she had been on better terms with the rest of Hogwarts, someone would have told her that, after nearly a year of training, all the professors had learned how to ignore the accompaniment of their dear colleague and listen to the things they were actually interested in. If she had been on better terms with Lockhart, she might have discovered this herself.

"He must be impatient," said Scrimgeour flatly.

"I believe it does," said Umbridge kindly. "Some would say it is shocking, others - the more intelligent ones - might say it is as it should be. In any case, it at least proves that someone should be policing Hogwarts... necessary policing, of course. Weeding out those who shouldn't be there..."

Scrimgeour said impatiently: "Preserve those precious ones, so as to polish the traditions and let the glorious light of wizardry shine again. I have heard this, Umbridge."

Lockhart began to tell how he had subdued a vicious, lame three-headed dog and given it to an old French wizard as a pet.

Anthony heard Kingsley ask, "No speculum either? Not even alchemical products?"

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"No, no, nothing," said Mad-Eye. "It's cleaner than a Muggle's house, with only a pile of papers... What kind of adventurer is this?" He snorted disdainfully, loud enough for Anthony to hear it without having to concentrate.

The two people behind him were silent for a while.

"What about Anthony?" Kingsley whispered. "Can he be trusted?"

Anthony pricked up his ears secretly, but he heard nothing except Mad-Eye's limping footsteps.

Mad-Eye seemed to do something. Kingsley said, "That's not too surprising."

"He's got a lot of good stuff," Mad-Eye said hoarsely. "But, well, I know what Albus will say..."

"Don't worry so much, Alastor, you're retired. Besides, I thought searching for Dark items was Madam Umbridge's job."

"She? Even if you put Sturgis's hat and the severed head hat in front of her, she couldn't tell the difference between them. But she must have realized something... When she told us where to find traces of Anthony's black magic, she was quite sure."

"By the way, did you find anything in that bathroom?"

"A bank of toilets, if that's what you're asking," Mad-Eye snapped. "And a psychotic ghost who died from that basilisk. It'd be odd if there wasn't some Dark Magic going on there."

"The same bathroom where Myrtle Warren died? No wonder."

Mad-Eye muttered in dissatisfaction, "If you had just shut up and walked in instead of saying some 'that's the girls' bathroom' crap with Rufus, you would have realized it!"

"None of us expected you to walk in there," Kingsley said quietly. "It was just a matter of a glance for you."

Mad-Eye sounded even more annoyed: "No matter how many means of investigation there are, it is not as good as going there to confirm it in person! Do you know how many great wizards were killed by their own magic experiments because they ignored this? Besides, I will never peek into the student bathroom!"

Lockhart turned his head. "Oh, who was killed in the explosion? What a pity I wasn't there at the time! You know, I once found a few wizards in a basement in Cairo. At first they just wanted to study the mummy..."

Scrimgeour said perfunctorily to Umbridge: "Of course, of course, we will pay attention... just biding our time, but we always have our eyes on the water... just like... uh, the crocodiles in the Nile..."

(End of this chapter)