The years when I was deceived into northern Myanmar

boom!
  In the smoke-filled city, dozens of Burmese soldiers were hiding behind tanks and peering around. At the building directly in front, a heavy machine gun suddenly opened fire, and the bullets kept hitting countless sparks on the armor of the tank.

And as if the tank was being stung, it slowly turned its muzzle, and with one shot, fire burst out in the floor, and the glass of the entire building was shattered.

The stormy night returned to calm again under the sound of the cannon. Only at the corner of the street were several greenskin soldiers holding firearms and running wildly without looking back, panicking like bereaved dogs.

"we won!"

“The Wa State Army escaped!!!”

"Dear viewers, we entered Mengmao one hour and forty minutes ago, and encountered stubborn local resistance in Mengmao. However, the heroic Burmese army was fearless and finally fought back after destroying four of the opponent's armored vehicles. The enemy’s last garrison!”

The reporter stood in the ruins of the city, extremely excited. He spoke passionately to the camera lens in a straight suit, but behind him was the billowing smoke of the county town.

Nothing seems wrong, it seems.

At this moment, the division commander entered Mengmao in an armored vehicle. He also took a special look at the watch on his wrist. The time displayed on it was 03:40 in the morning. Even the time seemed like a time that should be won. In this time period People's willpower is the weakest, and sleepiness and exhaustion will sweep over...

With the support of Mengneng, a county town with no foundation, Mengmao has backward equipment, few troops, and lack of faith support. It seems that a huge defeat is a sure outcome.

Can……

But why do I feel so uneasy even though I have clearly won?

"Come on!"

"Send me an order to prevent our troops from slacking off. We will use the center of Mengmao as the starting point to search the entire county. I ask them to search every building until they are sure that there is no ambush anywhere!"

"Yes!"

He has been very careful.

Be careful enough that you really can’t make the mistake again!
  But at this moment, his subordinates rushed over from the street with guns and helmets: "Commander!"

"A group of main troops who discovered the sudden retreat have withdrawn, and asked me to come and ask if we should pursue them!"

"Don't chase!"

The teacher didn't even need to think, and responded directly: "You can't bite off more than you can chew."

This division commander was obviously a man with extremely rich combat experience. He did not want to be bitten by a poisonous snake hiding in the grass while hunting rabbits, and he did not want his military medal to be contaminated with even a little dust.

Because tonight, as long as there are no mistakes, it will be perfect.

……

In the mountains, I looked forward expectantly in the dark night.

I know that after this last touch of darkness has passed, Meng Mao will usher in the light of a new day, but I don’t know whether this light contains my own future.

I can only wait.

All we can do is...wait.

"coming!"

Another group of greenskin soldiers retreated. They were worse than the previous artillery battalion. They were all haggard and disgraced. They even gasped for air and ran as fast as they could to escape for their lives.

The next second, the headlights of a car at the foot of the mountain turned on, and someone asked, "Where are you from?!"

The green soldiers responded: "Military District 729!"

After the two sides came into contact, within five minutes, the leader of the greenskin soldiers was brought to me.

This time, I didn't care about acting at all. I was so anxious that I felt like I was being burned by a ball of fire: "How is the emergency situation?"

"Lost." He lowered his head dejectedly and said in a deep voice: "The tanks of the Burmese army drove into Mengmao. We couldn't withstand it at all. Every machine gun point set up was blown up. Whenever we heard the sound of gunfire, we lost." The tanks were bombarded with artillery.”

"Can't win~"

When he said the last sentence, his face did not show the sadness of a soldier who had failed. Instead, it looked like the helpless response of an employee of a company after the plan failed: "I didn't recruit either."

"Then you..." I asked without hugging him for a moment.

He covered his face with his hands in shame, and said as if he felt a little embarrassed: "Yang Rong will not allow any more fighting. Tell all the troops to retreat in an orderly manner and in batches."

"all?"

"all."

He finally raised his head: "But some people still didn't evacuate. I saw with my own eyes that the second company crashed into a Burmese armored vehicle. They were destroyed by machine guns as soon as they met. Those who survived got into the building... Master ?”

While he was speaking, he noticed that the eyes of the person opposite him had become hollow, and then he called out in warning.

I didn't wake up.

Because I can’t figure it out!
  Yang Rong chose to protect the entire army but lost the tanks and armored vehicles that I had worked so hard to acquire. Will the future be miserable?
  If you thought you couldn't win from the beginning, couldn't you just evacuate the entire army? At least I got half of the equipment back. At least I can still resist for a while in Meng Neng!
  I had deep suspicions. Even though I no longer doubted Yang Rong's betrayal, I had begun to doubt his ability in command.

Yes, a person who knows nothing about the military is doubting a person who grew up wearing a military uniform.

I, an outsider, am so self-righteous that I despise an expert!
  "Grandpa?"

Banbra touched my shoulder with his hand, and this touch brought me back to the real world.

I seemed to see the building about to collapse.

If my life ends here, I would like to say that this is my flower blooming in a moment, snow chaos in a moment, this is my life climbing from the bottom of the pyramid to the top. I thought the scenery there was unique, but I didn’t expect that when I stood there, When at high places...

The collapse of the world that I saw was not with a bang, but with a sigh.

Can we come again?
  I do not know.

I should have said something. I should have said something like what Brother Huo said when he was sentenced to death in court, to us brothers who were trying to save their lives. I should also say something like: "Everyone, raise your heads! Who are you crying for?" look!"

"Have you fucking forgotten why you followed me in the first place? You've lost all face!"

"Then I'm telling you now, if there are bullets, I will carry them with my head for you!"

In this way, at the last moment of his life, he held his head and chest high in front of the law, judges, and public trial people, as if to say: "I am a fucking member of society, my life is gone, my job is gone, my face is gone, No fucking okay!”

but me.

But he couldn't say a word.

Even though I knew I could still hold the blood-stained knife, I could no longer forcefully suppress this uneasy heart when the outcome was already determined.

At that second, I, an old man in his late forties, seemed to be back when I was a kid again. Fear still flickered in my heart. This flicker was not the flickering of fear. It was because I only occasionally dared to open my eyes and look. One glance.

Only then did I realize what kind of fucking big brother I was. Even if I was, there are three levels of big brother, and I would still stand at the bottom.

I forage for food in a world full of thorns, just to survive; I walk a tightrope in the shadows of traps, forcing myself to show a smile.

When I felt that I could overturn mountains and rivers, move mountains and reclaim seas, and finally found what I wanted, and thought I could compete with the world, then I realized that the joy I gained was only for a moment, and it lasted longer. It’s the fucking fear of losing it.

And I have been waiting for that light of hope. Anyone can light it.

"Master, Yang Rong is back." (End of chapter)