Siheyuan: Domineering life

winter solstice.

That day, Yang Jun took his family to the ancestral hall in the suburbs to pay respects to their ancestors.

Since his mother, Wang Yuying, passed away, Yang Jun has visited the ancestral hall even less often. He almost never comes to the ancestral hall unless it's for festivals or sacrificial ceremonies.

After his mother passed away, his step-aunt Ma Juan and his cousin Yang Tao lived here.

"Hello, Mr. Yang."

Having been notified early in the morning, security captain Yan Douzi had already led a group of security guards to stand in two rows at the entrance to greet them.

Yang Jun got out of the car, glanced at them, and said, "From now on, all these kinds of ceremonial things should be abolished. Don't do anything unnecessary."

"You just need to do your job well, and don't worry about anything else."

Upon hearing this, Yan Douzi quickly put his legs together and said, "Reporting to Mr. Yang, I have not neglected my work. These people are all on leave, and everyone else is on duty."

"It's good that you haven't slacked off." Yang Jun nodded and said, "However, there's no need to take up everyone's rest time."

After saying that, he glanced at everyone and said, "Everyone, disperse. Those who need to rest, rest; those who need to go home, go home."

"It's all gone."

At Yan Douzi's command, all the security guards dispersed.

Yang Jun stood at the entrance of the ancestral hall and looked up at the huge, dark plaque above the door. Four large characters were written in gilded script: "Yang Family Ancestral Hall". The plaque was written by the most famous calligrapher of the time, and the thick and vigorous characters looked ancient and heavy, giving people a solemn feeling.

He stepped into the courtyard, where he was greeted by lush green pines and cypresses, a verdant landscape that was particularly pleasing to the eye.

"Mr. Yang."

A voice suddenly came from behind.

Yang Jun turned around and saw that it was his second aunt, Ma Juan.

Although Ma Juan was his elder, she always addressed him as Mr. Yang, which made Yang Jun very uncomfortable. However, he knew that Ma Juan could not change her ways in a short time, or even in her lifetime. That kind of class consciousness was deeply rooted in her mind, and she could not change it no matter what.

"Second aunt."

Yang Jun called out and walked over.

Are you getting used to living here?

Ma Juan: "It's great. The conditions here are very good, and it's quiet too."

"I hope you're comfortable here. If not, I'll arrange a place for you to stay in the city, which will be convenient for you to take your child to school."

"No need for that trouble, really. It's great living here. Tao'er and I are both very satisfied."

"Okay, if you need anything, just let me know."

Yang Jun chatted with his second aunt for a few minutes, and then Yi Qiushui started talking to her.

The group reminisced as they walked toward the main hall of the ancestral hall.

There are dedicated staff to manage this place, and it is cleaned every day. Offerings and incense are offered continuously every year, so the Yang family ancestors can enjoy the offerings 24 hours a day.

Yang Jun walked to the offering table, took three incense sticks, lit them on the candles, and bowed three times to the ancestral tablets.

Yi Qiushui and the others followed behind and bowed as well.

After doing all that, Yang Jun walked around the hall and then went to the cemetery at the back.

The ancestral hall is where the Yang family ancestors are worshipped, while the cemetery behind it is where his dearest family members are buried. There are the graves of his grandparents, his parents, and Aunt Wang.

Five people are buried here. These five people are his closest relatives. In the future, more of his relatives will be buried here: his wife, his son, his grandson...

Standing before his parents' graves, Yang Jun felt extremely heavy-hearted.

He was always thinking about things decades from now. He possessed the essence of dragon and phoenix, which would allow him to live forever, but his family would not. They would leave him one by one, and the thought of that pain and loneliness was terrifying.

"Dad, Mom, I've come to see you."

Yang Jun muttered to himself.

Yi Qiushui and the others squatted on the ground, took out offerings from the basket, lit candles, and arranged the sacrificial animals. Then they retreated behind Yang Jun and stood there quietly.

"Dad, Mom, I'm in so much pain."

The thought that this land would one day bury even more of his loved ones filled Yang Jun with unspeakable pain.

Yi Qiushui and the others were taken aback when they heard this, but they all thought it was just Yang Jun talking nonsense because he missed his parents too much, so they didn't take it to heart.

"Dad, Mom, do you know how lonely your son is?"

Yang Jun murmured to himself again, "Sometimes I really want to follow you, but I don't have the courage to end my own life."

"husband."

Hearing this, Yi Qiushui and the others sensed something was wrong and quickly spoke up.

"Do not worry about me."

Yang Jun raised his hand, indicating that they didn't need to worry.

Then, facing his parents' gravestones, he said, "I am so lonely, I am in so much pain, but... I can't change any of this."

No one knew what Yang Jun was talking about. They just felt that he was acting strangely today, talking about life and death, loneliness and pain. Yang Jun was acting very strangely today, which was puzzling.

"mom."

Yang Jun shouted and squatted down to burn paper money.

"Do you know that since you left me, I have been a child without parents? I wish I could be your child again, to hear your teachings again, even just a few words of nagging would be enough."

"You left so suddenly, I wasn't prepared at all, boohoo!"

Overwhelmed with grief, Yang Jun couldn't help but sob.

He let the tears blur his vision; he needed to release his emotions, he needed to confide in someone, he needed to pour out his heart…

"Mom, sob sob!"

This was the first time Yi Qiushui and the others had ever seen Yang Jun cry. Listening to his heart-wrenching lament, they felt a deep empathy for him, and their eyes all welled up with tears.

"husband."

Yi Qiushui squatted down beside him and gently comforted him, "Don't say these things, so as not to worry your mother."

"You've come all this way to visit your parents, so don't let them worry anymore."

Upon hearing this, Yang Jun gently wiped away the tears from the corners of his eyes with his sleeve.

"Mom, I'm so sorry. You're enjoying your retirement, and I'm still nagging you. I'm so unfilial."

"However... there are some things I don't want to say to you, and there's no one else to talk to."

To be honest, he was truly in pain and lonely. For so many years, he had kept many things hidden in his heart, things that even Yi Qiushui couldn't tell him. He could only talk about them with his mother. Unfortunately, his mother passed away too suddenly, leaving him in a panic. From then on, he had no one to confide in.

"Forget it, I'm not going to talk to you anymore. I bet you've already seen Dad by now. After all this time apart, you've probably forgotten about your son."

Yang Jun smiled wryly and said, "If you find it too annoying to talk about it, then I won't bother you two anymore."

After saying that, he stood up.

After calming himself down, he walked to his grandparents' joint grave. He had only met his grandmother once in his life, and that was the last time he saw her. He didn't know her very well. On the other hand, he had spent some time with his grandfather, who was a wise old man. Like most elderly people, he was kind, simple, and honest. He was especially like a wise man when he was smoking his pipe alone.

Over the years, Yang Jun learned a lot about life and how to conduct himself from his grandfather. He learned to be kind to his own people, to maintain a calm attitude towards others, to not be elated by external gains or saddened by personal losses, and to control his emotions. This is the standard of a mature man.

"Grandpa, your grandson has come to see you."

As Yang Jun spoke, he gestured for everyone to place the offerings on the table.

In fact, the offerings are changed every day, but these are all specially prepared by him, because he has to show his respect no matter what.

Yi Qiushui and the others squatted there arranging offerings.

"grandfather……"

Yang Jun wanted to say something, but the words caught in his throat.

His grandfather had been gone for so long that he could barely remember what his grandfather looked like. The scenes of their time together had become increasingly blurry, and even though he racked his brains to recall them, he still couldn't get complete fragments.

"Sigh, time really can heal all wounds." Yang Jun sighed deeply.

Hearing this, Yi Qiushui and Huang Yani exchanged glances, thinking that Yang Jun was talking nonsense again, and their eyes revealed deep worry.

Yang Jun didn't know what to say to his grandparents, so he bowed in the end.

After doing all this, he went to Wang Yuping's grave.

This is the only person who is not a member of the Yang family but is buried in the Yang family ancestral graveyard.

Although Wang Yuying and Wang Yuping were not related by blood, they were as close as sisters. Even though Wang Yuping eventually followed her mother in death, Yang Jun felt that she should be buried in the Yang family's ancestral graveyard because of their affection.

"Aunt Wang, did you see my mother over there?"

Yang Jun squatted down and burned paper money for her, saying as he burned it, "I hope you can be reborn as a family over there and become true sisters."

At that moment, the flames suddenly flickered, as if to indicate something.

"Oh, you heard that?" Yang Jun said with a wry smile.

Then the flame flickered inexplicably again, as if to indicate that it had truly understood.

"That's wonderful, I'm so happy for you two sisters."

Yang Jun gently wiped away the tears from the corners of his eyes, a sincere smile on his face. He was truly happy for his mother and Aunt Wang. They couldn't become sisters in this life, but in another world, they finally achieved their wish.

After the ancestral worship ceremony, Yi Qiushui and the others went to the front yard to help their second aunt make dumplings. They were staying to celebrate the Winter Solstice together.

Yang Jun stayed on the cemetery side and wandered around along the courtyard wall.

Since the last tomb raiding incident, the cemetery has strengthened its security measures. The perimeter wall has been raised to four meters high, with an electric fence installed on top. The area inside the wall has been planted with thorny trees for dozens of meters, and there are also security cameras all around, so there is no concern about safety.

"Mr. Yang, is there anything else that needs improvement?"

Yan Douzi, the security captain of the ancestral hall, accompanied Yang Jun throughout the entire process.

He is Sun Zhaocai's brother-in-law and was able to become the team leader through Sun Zhaocai's connections. Therefore, he cherishes and values ​​this job very much. Under his management, the cemetery security work is done very well, and Yang Jun also approves of him.

"You did a great job."

After Yang Jun finished speaking, he continued to wander around with his hands behind his back.

"Well, if you..."

Yan Douzi was about to say something when Sun Zhaocai glared at her and scared her back.

"Shut up."

Sun Zhaocai whispered, "Don't open your mouth unless the big boss asks you a question, understand?"

Sun Zhaocai understood Yang Jun; at this time, he needed time alone and didn't want to be disturbed.

"Yes, yes, I understand."

Yan Douzi was so frightened that she broke out in a cold sweat, kept her mouth tightly shut, and followed far behind.

Yang Jun walked around the courtyard wall but found no loopholes, so he went to the front yard with his hands behind his back.

Laughter and cheerful voices came from the front yard and side room. A group of women were making dumplings and chatting happily.

Yang Jun frowned but didn't say anything. He then turned and went to the east wing, where his mother used to live.

The east wing room was exactly as it had been when my mother was alive. Nothing had changed. Every table and chair was so familiar. Everything was the same except that my mother was no longer there.

Yang Jun sat in the chair, lit a cigarette, and sat there quietly.

Surrounded by smoke, his eyes were blurry and his mind was hazy. He seemed to see scenes from the past when he spent time with his mother. His mother would sit on the doorstep, knitting a sweater and chatting with him. The leisurely scene looked so warm and cozy.

In his memory, his mother always had an endless supply of sweaters to knit. Every time he came over, his mother would be there with these sweaters. She wanted to knit a sweater for each of her grandchildren, to express her love and care for the younger generation as an elder.

Yang Jun's mother didn't have any great ambitions in her life. She only wanted her family to be safe and healthy, and she also hoped that the Yang family would have more and more descendants. Yang Jun remembers that the words his mother said to him most often were urging him to have children.

Now he has more and more children, but sadly his mother will never see them again.

Next month, the Yang family will be expanding again with the addition of new members. Yang Qingxiang, Li Jingqiu, and Meng Wenya are about to give birth, and the family will have four more children.

From that moment on, Yang Jun became the father of twenty-one children.

For him, the more children the better, and if possible, he will continue to have children in the future.

"husband."

Just as Yang Jun was deep in thought, Yi Qiushui entered.

She sat down next to Yang Jun, holding his hands in both, and looked at him with a worried expression.

"Are you OK?"

She was quite frightened by Yang Jun's strange words at the cemetery, thinking that he was going to abandon them.

"I am fine."

Yang Jun held her hand tightly and smiled, "Don't worry, I'm really fine."

"It's good that you're alright. Do you know how scared you were? We thought you..."

"You thought I was trying to commit suicide?" Yang Jun looked at her with a smile.

Yi Qiushui remained silent and nodded heavily.

"How could that be? How could someone as valuing of life as me possibly take my own life?"

After a slight pause, Yang Jun said softly, "I just feel a strange fear and loneliness when I think about how you will all leave me one by one decades from now."

"What's there to worry about? We've left, and you'll be back then..."

Suddenly, Yi Qiushui thought of something, and her expression immediately became dejected.

Yes, Yang Jun can live forever, but they cannot. When that time comes, they will leave first, leaving Yang Jun alone in the world. That kind of loneliness and pain is unbearable for ordinary people.

She sighed deeply at the thought of Yang Jun's future life.

"Husband..." (End of Chapter)