Love letters are not allowed in exorcism notes

Chapter 1233 The Story of the Eighteen Bowls of Wine to Block the Door

At nine o'clock in the morning, the wedding procession was already waiting at the door.

Normally, weddings start in the afternoon, but you can't not prepare in advance.

These days, transportation isn't convenient either; it's impossible for someone to leave at two o'clock and for them to start preparing at one o'clock.

The first thing to do is to give everyone red envelopes, and then provide lunch.

This task cannot be done by the groom; it is handled by a special best man.

Wang Yunxiao's side is You Tiao, and Li Mumu's side is Mu Panpan.

Wang Yunxiao was already dressed in a bright red round-necked, wide-sleeved shirt in the inner room, looking very festive.

According to the rules of the previous dynasty, on the occasion of the wedding, women could wear a phoenix coronet and embroidered robe, and men could wear the robes of a ninth-rank official. Therefore, in common parlance, getting married was also called "minor success in the imperial examination".

This is already a simplified procedure. In the past, the bride and groom would be a fierce general and the bride would be the daughter of a military family. The wedding procession would also include a guard team armed with guns and swords. Of course, the gun tips would be wrapped in red cloth, and the swords would not be drawn.

If one has also distinguished oneself in battle, one may carry an axe as a ceremonial weapon.

With all preparations complete and all personnel in place, it was already noon.

After a simple meal, Wang Yunxiao mounted his tall horse, said "Let's go," and the band in front began to play.

The team slowly started moving.

Whether it's the wedding procession or the wedding farewell, the pace can't be too fast. The point is to make a grand spectacle of the procession through the streets; rushing things would be inappropriate. If the groom were to fall off the sedan chair or the bride were to fall on the way, it would become a complete laughingstock.

They set off from home, accompanied by music and fanfare, and arrived at the gate of Prince Mu's mansion at one o'clock in the afternoon.

There weren't many people on Wang Yunxiao's side, but the Mu Prince's Mansion was packed with people.

Traditionally, the groom's family hosts the wedding banquet, and the bride's family simply sends the bride off.

Unfortunately, Li Mumu has a good father.

When people have money, they feel like they have a lot of relatives and friends.

Even if you don't invite them, some people will still shamelessly call or come to your door.

But these are all minor matters.

Wang Yunxiao had no intention of socializing with these people.

Several tables were set up at the entrance of Prince Mu's mansion, with eighteen jars of fine wine under the tables and eighteen large bowls on the tables.

This is a so-called "door-blocking wine" specially prepared by a general of the previous dynasty to make things difficult for the new son-in-law.

It's not mentioned in official history, but there is a story about it, which was later adapted into a play, also called "The Banquet at the Gate".

The gist of the story is that a down-on-his-luck scholar fell in love with the daughter of a general. The general disliked his frail physique and lack of official rank, but outwardly agreed to the marriage. On the wedding day, the general set up eighteen jars of wine at the door and told the scholar that he could only take his daughter away after he had finished drinking them.

The scholar himself was certainly not up to the task, but he had a sworn brother with a chivalrous spirit who helped him finish all eighteen jars of wine. The general admired the young man's drinking skills and betrothed his second daughter to him, and in the end, good things came to both of them.

This has evolved into a customary rule.

The eighteen bowls on the table are for the groom, and the eighteen jars under the table are for his relatives and friends. Of course, if you have an amazing capacity for alcohol and can drink all eighteen jars of wine by yourself, then there's a reason for that too.

The bride's family needs to add another dowry.

As for what the dowry was, don't ask any more questions. Anyway, people were already drunk to the point of being delirious at that time, so there's no point in saying more.

Of course, there are also shortcuts.

Just like in the opera, the scholar was very cunning. He first offered three bowls of wine to heaven, earth, and his ancestors. Halfway through, he recited a poem and pretended to accidentally knock over the rest of the bowls...

If you really can't drink, then just play around like this. Don't worry about what others say. Getting married is the most important thing.

Wang Yunxiao jumped off his horse, thinking to himself, "It's just eighteen bowls, who do you think you are?" But as soon as he smelled the aroma, he frowned.

The ancients drank rice wine, or yellow wine, or Daughter's Red wine, which was consumed at this time.

What the hell is this, you guys making me Li Family Shaobai?

Hmm... Never mind, it's not a big deal.

Guozi is always rather reckless. Before Wang Yunxiao even picked up his bowl, he threw the goose in his hand aside, picked up the wine jar, smashed the mud seal, grabbed it, and started drinking wildly.

The people around cheered loudly.

Among the soldiers who fought fiercely, they admired this kind of decisive and efficient hero the most.

Regardless of how much you can drink, at least this attitude is correct.

That's exactly the dramatic effect we wanted.

Otherwise, on such a joyous occasion, if you all have such serious and unsmiling faces, is it like marrying a bride or sending off a dead person?

The wine jar isn't big; it's not one of those large vats with a wide opening. Those are for brewing wine, not for selling. This jar contains about three to five pounds of wine.

Wang Yunxiao slowly picked up his bowl and drank it down one bowl at a time. His brothers behind him also came out and each took a jar.

This is something that can't be done by outsiders; it has to be a brother you'd risk your life for.

Otherwise, it wouldn't be fun if you just hired a drunkard to drink with you.

There's an old story called "entrusting one's wife and children," which refers to the deep bond of friendship. After drinking at this celebratory feast, if you were to die in battle, your surviving brothers would be obligated to take care of your wife and children, and in return, you would also have an obligation to care for the families of others.

This is the true meaning of the traditional custom of holding a welcoming feast at the door when a family holds a wedding. For ordinary families, it's just for good luck and celebration.

Fried dough sticks, sesame balls, fried cakes, loach, and two sheep—all the brothers who came today came up and each took a jar.

All of them were former soldiers, a row of muscular men lined up, drinking heavily, drawing cheers from those around them.

Seven jars of wine were distributed, leaving five jars remaining.

Wang Yunxiao finished his eighteenth bowl, wiped his mouth, and was slightly tipsy.

With his current physical condition, this amount of alcohol is not a problem at all; he could even use industrial ethanol instead.

But the bladder might not be able to handle it.

Letting out a sigh of relief and wiping the sweat from his brow, Wang Yunxiao was about to reach for the wine jar under the table when he heard someone shout from outside, "Hey Wang! Can I have a sip of this wine?"

The onlookers immediately started to jeer loudly.

This is also a common trope in traditional Chinese opera; in futuristic internet terms, it's a "meme."

In the play, the scholar was at a loss for what to do when faced with the challenge of being stopped at the door to drink wine. Just then, his sworn brother rushed back from outside and asked for the wine in front of everyone.

The crowd parted to make way for them.

Han Bin and Yan Yu'an walked in.

Han Bin walked closer and chuckled in a low voice, "What are you pretending for, kid? You're drinking like a woman, I can hardly bear to watch."

Wang Yunxiao thought to himself, "Nonsense, I still have important business to attend to after I finish drinking."

Han Bin glanced at the remaining jars of wine and smiled at Yan Yu'an, "Let's help Old Wang out a bit, so he won't have trouble getting into bed at night."

Yan Yu'an said helplessly, "I can't hold my liquor..."

"You drank quite a lot back in the Yagyu Dojo."

"Can that be the same?"

Han Bin laughed and lightly stomped his foot on the ground, causing a wine jar to jump up and fly into the air.

He raised his hand and struck out, shattering the wine jar in mid-air, the clear wine cascading down. But just as it entered his mouth, a ghastly green will-o'-the-wisp suddenly burst forth from the wine.

"Fuck!"

Han Bin was startled and immediately took three steps back. The wine spilled on the ground, and fierce flames shot into the sky.

"Alas--!"

A chorus of boos erupted from those around them.

Everyone could tell that the bride's family was up to something.

How could you possibly enjoy drinking the welcoming wine so easily and pleasantly?

Just as Han Bin was dumbfounded, the remaining four wine jars suddenly sprouted mechanical tentacles and scattered in all directions like octopuses. From inside the gate came Shen Qingxi's triumphant voice: "Young master, you have to drink this wine yourself!"

Do you want to die?
Wang Yunxiao remained outwardly calm, but inwardly he was seething with rage.

On such a joyous occasion, you've given me this much trouble. I think you really need a good scolding.

And Commander Xia, you actually joined in the fun too? Is this your typical persona?
This bizarre sight was nothing to Wang Yunxiao and his group, but it was quite terrifying for the onlookers. The cheers instantly turned into screams, and many people were so frightened by the several wine jars running around that they wet themselves.

At that moment, Yan Yu'an said, "Freeze!"

With a flash of golden light, the four wine jars were instantly frozen in place, unable to move.

Han Bin raised his foot and stomped hard on the ground. The four wine jars shattered at the same time, and four water arrows shot into the sky. Under his control, they converged into a water ball and fell towards his palm.

The wine once again ignited with emerald green flames, but this time Han Bin neither dodged nor avoided it, and swallowed the huge, blazing water ball into his stomach in one gulp.

"I'm definitely drinking this wine tonight!"

"it is good--!"

Among the onlookers were some brave and fearless individuals who, upon seeing this scene, immediately clapped and cheered.

After the eighteen jars of welcoming wine were finished, the two strings of firecrackers that had been prepared beforehand were lit.

Crackling, crackling!
"Please, bride, leave now!"

The main gate of the Prince's mansion was wide open, and Li Mumu, dressed in a gold and red wedding gown and wearing a red veil, slowly walked out with the help of Mu Panpan.

……

"Wow, so romantic!"

Half a street away from the entrance of the Prince's Mansion, Xu Huan, standing on a high place, held a dog leash, stroked the white dog's head, and looked at the little girl next to him who was excited and blushing with a puzzled expression.

Who are you?
My great-great-great-granddaughter got married, what's it to you? Look how happy you are.

"Which side are you from?"

"what?"

Seeing the little girl's blank expression, Xu Huange coughed and asked seriously, "I'm asking you, are you referring to relatives from the man's side or the woman's side?"

Yes, they are.

Xu Huange: "???"

Is this child mentally challenged?
Wait, that’s not right!
She suddenly thought of an unlikely possibility.

"Have you not……"

"My dad married my mom, so of course I belong to both sides!"

"hiss--"

Xu Huange gasped, realizing she had guessed correctly.

"May I ask your name, young lady?"

The little girl patted her chest and proudly replied, "My name is Li Xigua!"

"Good name!"

Xu Huange's pupils dilated.

My Xu family is a scholarly family... well, a scholarly family. But by the time it came to my great-great-great-great-granddaughter, the last bit of our literary tradition had been completely exhausted.

"How did you come?"

The little girl giggled and said, "My aunt brought me here?"

"And who is your aunt...?"

Just as Xu Huange was about to ask more questions, the white dog beside her suddenly spoke up, "You two, don't run around. I'm going to buy some oranges."

After saying that, she vanished from the spot in an instant.

Xu Huange was taken aback for a moment, then immediately became serious and said to the little girl, "You have to be good and listen to me and don't run around."

A sly glint flashed in the little girl's eyes as she grinned mischievously and said, "But why should I listen to you?"

"Because in terms of seniority, you are my great-great-great-great-great-granddaughter."

Xu Huange tried to straighten his non-existent chest and said earnestly, "You can call me Ancestor, I can accept that."

"Neuropathy!"

Li Xigua didn't believe it at all.

"If you behave and don't run around, I'll take you to set off firecrackers in a bit."

"Set off firecrackers? Who are you trying to fool? Do you think I'm a three-year-old? I'm five!"

"I'll take you to Prince Mu's mansion to steal the firecrackers they haven't finished setting off."

"Um……"

"Then go blow up the manhole cover."

"Okay, Patriarch!"

…………

Just as the bride, her head covered by a red veil, sat into the sedan chair, someone beside her shouted, "Move the sedan chair and return to the mansion!"

The suona horn of the band suddenly blared.

Wang Yunxiao, mounted on his horse, frowned slightly. Was that sound a bit off?
Why does the suona make a "hoo" sound?

However, the sound of the wind and percussion in front was so loud that it drowned out all other sounds, so he didn't think much of it.

The wedding procession, with its banging and clanging, retraced its steps.

Halfway there, the sedan chair suddenly began to shake violently. The eight sedan bearers outside initially managed to hold it up, but when they realized they couldn't keep it steady, they quickly shouted, "Bride, sit still and don't move!"

Something is wrong!
Wang Yunxiao suddenly realized something was wrong, jumped off his horse and ran to the sedan chair in three quick steps, then yanked open the curtain.

It's empty inside.

Holy crap, where is my wife? I just saw her get in!
Wang Yunxiao was shocked and thought to himself, "Li Mumu, you didn't change your mind at the last minute and run away from the wedding, did you?"

But after calming down and thinking about it, it seems unlikely.

Who is Li Mumu? If she really doesn't want to get married, Wang Yunxiao can't do anything about it.

"what happened?"

Yan Yu'an caught up and took a peek, and was immediately stunned: "Where's the bride?"

"I'm not there! I'm riding a horse up ahead!"

"Old Han and I are following behind, there's no way we'll lose him."

Yan Yu'an's eyes flickered as he lowered the sedan curtain, whispering three words in Wang Yunxiao's ear: "Moat!"

Wang Yunxiao suddenly realized.

Tianmen City possesses a protective barrier specifically designed to prevent invasions from outer dimensions—the moat dimension. When a crisis is detected, it can drag people in the real world into the moat without anyone else noticing.

Wang Yunxiao was very familiar with the moat; it was like home to him.

This explanation makes sense. The only problem is, how could Li Mumu be dragged into the moat in front of everyone?
There was absolutely no warning beforehand...

"Don't make a fuss, let them keep moving forward."

Yan Yu'an pulled Wang Yunxiao aside and said seriously, "With Lao Han and me here, you don't need to worry."

I'm not worried.

Wang Yunxiao thought to himself, "I'm mainly worried that you don't really know what kind of person my wife is."

(End of this chapter)