Don't be afraid, fairy, I'm blind

Chapter 500: Su Er, Stay (5.6k)

He Shutong has been feeling a little complicated lately.

Since she was young, she was brought up as a fairy of books, and all she read were jade books and classics.

The more she read, the more she felt that the principles of enlightenment in the books were completely contrary to her behavior of being forced to read.

She resisted such a life, which made her begin to hate reading. So after she decided to learn swordsmanship, she rarely took the initiative to read except when necessary for training.

However, his third disciple Ji Lingruo was worried that she would be bored living in the snake clan, so he kindly gave her a book to cheer her up.

She didn't like reading but was given a book. However, she still happily accepted this inappropriate gift. After all, Ling Ruo didn't know her past and her likes and dislikes, so she was very pleased that he had such a thoughtful attitude.

But she also found the title of the book funny - "The Return of the Condor Heroes". How could it be a mortal story book?

Ling Ruo was naturally romantic, and she had never thought that she had been a fairy of the Lotus Sword for nearly three hundred years, so how could she read such mundane books that only little girls like to read? If she really wanted to give her a gift, she should have given her a collection of poems or a scroll of paintings.

But she didn't feel angry, instead she thought this disciple was cute. She thought Lingruo must love reading this book so much that she wanted to share it with her.

It is a wonderful thing to share the things you like with the people you like.

She felt guilty that she had not cared enough for her disciple Lingruo.

Then she took out the storybook that had been placed in the corner for two days, thinking that she also needed to know more about Ji Lingruo, and it was not because she really felt bored in this stuffy bamboo house.

But as she opened the first page of the book, she almost closed it again, because the author's signature read "Junior Sister is the best in the world".

He Shutong couldn't figure it out. How low of a literary attainment must an author have to choose such a pen name? At worst, a pen name like "Mr. So-and-so" would be more elegant, right?
But it happened that a book written by such a person was regarded as a treasure by a little girl like Lingruo. She suppressed her contempt and opened the second page with a critical attitude.

The hero's name was Guantu. He Shutong did not find anything strange about it. He just felt that the words used in this mundane storybook were straightforward and the sentences were casual, so reading it was not as tiring as when he was a child reading those ancient books.

But perhaps it is precisely because of this that a vivid low-level martial arts world slowly unfolds from the book, making people turn a few more pages unknowingly.

But it was not until he saw the woman in the fluttering white dress and the graceful figure appear that He Shutong's pupils suddenly shrank and he regained consciousness instantly.

This woman's name...why is it He Shutong? !

Is it a coincidence?

She instinctively thought so. After all, few people knew her real name, and she was definitely not the only one in the world with this name.

But, this person's name appeared in the book Ling Ruo gave her...

Did Ling Ruo do it on purpose? No, there was nothing strange about her expression when she gave me the book, so she probably didn't know my common name.

So that means it's just a pure coincidence.

He Shutong felt that she had discovered an incredible secret by chance. Now when she looked at the name of the male protagonist again, she actually felt a vague sense of familiarity.

Yes, his surname is also Guan.

Guantu - The book specifically explains the meaning of the name given to him by his adoptive father, which means that he was penniless and had nothing.

This made her feel sympathy for the hero when she read it, but now when she read it again, she clearly felt that there was another metaphor. And among all the readers, I am afraid that only she, the real "He Shutong", can understand this metaphor.

Officials and followers of the King of Chu.

Combined with that tacky author's signature, even if He Shutong was stupid, she guessed who the author was.

She turned to the title page again and found that the book was published last year. She couldn't help but tremble in her heart. She didn't expect that You Su's ambition towards her had already been revealed so early.

With this expectation in mind, I read the book again and found that there were so many coincidences in the plot of the book: he was taken in by a young man, they depended on each other, and they also had many ups and downs...

The two grew up together, sympathized with each other, and fell in love with each other, but because teacher-student relationships were not tolerated in the world, they separated and reunited, and stayed together through life and death.

Until the last moment when the "He Shutong" in the book jumped off the Cliff of Broken Heart, He Shutong outside the book felt like his intestines were about to break. He quickly closed the book and dared not read any more.

He wrote the emotional journey of the master and disciple in the book so tortuous and bumpy, it seems that he was very clear how difficult this relationship would be.

But even so, will he still persist like the official in the book?

So she didn't dare to read the ending, because she couldn't tell whether she wanted a tragedy or a comedy.

The heat in the bamboo hut was like an invisible spider web, trapping her on the lotus platform.

Her plain white silk shirt was soaked with sweat, revealing the lilac-colored edges of her hair underneath.

The cooling fan was humming in the distance, but the cool breeze it brought was much thinner and could not relieve the heat in her heart at all.

Because the ice melted.

And every time this happened, the boy would bring her new ice cubes without fail.

She looked at the swaying bamboo shadows outside the window and quickly hid the unfinished book behind her, but for no reason she remembered the boy's hot palm pressing on her waist in her dream last night.

In that dream, she had actually allowed him to detoxify without lying dumbly on the bed. Instead, he could stand up and hug her tightly from behind, sniffing the scent he had always dreamed of while leaning against her neck and letting her detoxify manually...

This was far beyond the normal boundaries between a master and a disciple. The palpitations she felt when she fell from the clouds that day surged up again, making her feel uneasy.

When He Shutong saw his reflection in the pool, his cheeks turned red as clouds. There was no trace of the cool and majestic demeanor of the Dongxu Sword Immortal.

Suddenly, she heard the sound of a bamboo door opening. She stood up like a frightened bird, and her wide sleeves swept across the teacup on the desk. Her panicked brows were reflected in the clear sound.

"Master's wife, today's ice has been delivered."

You Su's voice came through the bamboo curtain. Since that time when she said she needed to calm down, he never entered this bamboo curtain again.

He Shutong clenched the handkerchief tightly, and the tips of her ears felt hot, but she still suppressed the restlessness in her heart and hummed in a low voice.

But she thought the boy would put down the ice cup and leave as he did in the past, but unexpectedly, a dark figure was still standing in front of the door, and the shadow cast on the bamboo curtain was elongated by the scorching sun, like a stubborn green pine.

It seems that there are only two seasons in Japan, summer and winter. On a day in Central China when the autumn breeze should be brisk, the temperature in the bamboo hut on Snake Mountain becomes increasingly scorching.

The ice in the copper box of the cooling fan had completely melted, and the wind that blew out was also a bit dry.

He Shutong bit her lower lip. She knew that the boy was waiting for her, waiting for her to go out and get the ice jar he had just brought her.

But why did he suddenly change like this today? Why couldn't he keep his distance in reality like before and be intimate with me in dreams? Obviously, this is already good, isn't it...

She felt that if she didn't want to change the status quo, she should be ruthless and leave the boy outside. But she couldn't bear to let the boy stay in the hot sun for too long, so she said softly:
"…What is it?"

As soon as he finished speaking, the bamboo curtain was blown open by the wind. The boy's black hair was slightly curled by the sun, but his face was meticulous:
"I do have something to ask of you."

There was even a kind of coldness in the boy's voice that He Shutong had never heard before.

"The matter of the Golden Peng clan has not been resolved yet?" He Shutong frowned. When Ling Ruo came to find her, she had clearly told her that the snake clan was out of danger.

"No, I just have doubts about my technique."

The boy's tone remained the same, with a hint of coolness.

He Shutong's heart tightened, "Why didn't you say it earlier?"

You Su kept his head down the whole time, and even through the bamboo curtain, he didn't even look at her: "I'm afraid of disturbing Master's meditation."

The bamboo curtain swayed slightly, and He Shutong clenched his fingertips tighter.

It was obviously a natural answer, but when the boy said it in a cold tone that he had never used before, He Shutong felt a piercing pain in his heart.

Has he finally given up?
Every time she saw You Su's lonely back as he left the door, she felt heartbroken, but in order not to let the relationship deteriorate any further, she had to suppress her heartache.

But she never expected that this day would really come.

He Shutong suddenly felt that You Su looked so strange. He was no longer the boy who was ambitious for her when he grew up, nor was he the child who pestered her when he was young. He had become a stranger who only had the title of master and disciple. The change in the boy was so sudden that she was a little dazed for a moment.

But isn't this exactly what she wants? Why is it so sudden? She has shut him out for nearly two months and hasn't even spoken to him a few words. Isn't it normal for him to give up?
But in that story, didn't Guan Tu persist until the end? Didn't Guan Tu never look for He Shutong again after she jumped off the cliff?
He Shutong didn't know why she suddenly remembered the book whose ending she was afraid to read. She couldn't sort out her feelings. She only felt boundless bitterness filling her heart, making her throat tighten as if she was suffocating.

"Master's wife, the ice jar cannot withstand the sun." You Su's indifferent voice came again, "Put away the ice jar first."

He Shutong suddenly realized her gaffe, but she didn't want to get it when You Su was present because she didn't dare to face him. But since he was going to give up, what else should she worry about?
"Please bring it in..."

"I'll be just outside the door." The young man saluted.

Such a polite manner made He Shutong's heart feel like being stabbed by needles. She frowned, not knowing where the anger came from:

"I told you to come in, so you come in."

The boy's eyelashes trembled slightly, like a startled bird.

"Yes."

When You Su picked up the ice jar and opened the bamboo curtain, he smelled the familiar lotus fragrance and almost couldn't hold back the smile on his lips.

But he had prepared himself mentally, and he kept his composure straight, not even glancing at the fairy in white sitting in the middle.

It was more stuffy inside the bamboo hut than outside. The back half of He Shutong's lotus platform was surrounded by a small pond, with a few withered lotus leaves floating on the water.

"I'll change the ice for Master's wife first."

You Su bowed, silently moved Bingjian to the side of the fan, and quickly changed the source of cold air for her. He didn't say a word the whole time, and didn't even look away, as if there was no one else in the room.

He Shutong naturally took in all the boy's movements with her peripheral vision. The boy's posture was as straight as a pine tree, and his words and deeds were impeccable. This kind of adherence to the boundaries between master and disciple was what she had expected in the past, but seeing it now, she only felt an unspeakable bitter loss in her heart, as if something precious was slipping away quietly through her fingers.

After doing all this, the boy carefully pointed the fan towards her. This subconscious and considerate action made He Shutong feel heartbroken, so he pointed at the futon and said, "Sit down."

As she finished speaking, her sitting posture became unusually dignified, no longer showing the relaxed look she had shown before in front of You Su.

You Su knelt on the mat, the scent of the fairy's sweat lingering on his nose, which was even more refreshing than in his dream. He didn't dare to smell it for fear that his pretended coolness would be broken.

If she didn't speak, he wouldn't speak either. Perhaps because he didn't want the atmosphere to be so awkward, He Shutong opened his mouth softly, "Why didn't you bring any dessert today?"

You Su was slightly startled when he heard this, and said in a light voice: "Master's wife once said that it is not necessary to send it every day, so I will remember it."

He Shutong was speechless for a moment, and awkwardly clenched the lotus pattern on his sleeves, feeling a surge of bitterness in his throat.

She was afraid that he would think she was greedy, so she pretended to be reserved. But he had clearly not taken it seriously before and still sent her food every day. But today, he took her words to heart again, and his deliberate distance seemed to make him treat her as a superior and difficult-to-approach master's wife.

Her reflection on the edge of the withered lotus looked particularly thin. She suppressed the complicated emotions in her heart and decided to get straight to the point:
"Do you have any questions about the technique?"

You Su bowed his head and said, "Disciple would like to ask for the method of external dual cultivation."

He Shutong opened her beautiful eyes slightly, and was very surprised that You Su said these words so bluntly.

When they were still at Lotus Peak, even though You Su already knew that she was actually a disciple of the Mandarin Duck Sword Sect and was also proficient in the Yin-Yang method, he never took the initiative to mention related matters in front of her. On the contrary, she took the initiative to teach him several times when they discussed the Dao.

Thinking about it now, she knew that the reason was not as simple as the boy treating her as an elder of the opposite sex who was embarrassed to talk about shame. In his eyes, she was a holy fairy who was sacred and inviolable, pure and inviolable, so he subconsciously felt that it was inappropriate to talk about these things with her, even though she was his de facto master.

But now, he said it to her without hesitation.

why?
Because he no longer has to maintain the holy fairy image in his mind, nor does he need to maintain his upright image in the eyes of this holy fairy.

She was just a teacher who helped him to solve his doubts. When talking about these things, there was no need to worry about the opposite sex, but only about the truth itself.

"External dual cultivation is a side technique in the sect's practice. Why do you suddenly want to learn it?"

You Su paused after hearing this, a bitter smile appeared on the corner of his lips, "My disciple has his own difficulties, it is better for Master's wife not to know."

His refusal made He Shutong feel stuffy in her chest. The boy who used to respect her, love her and treat her without reservation, now seemed like an invisible barrier between her and him, making her unable to grasp or touch him.

She knew clearly that You Su's behavior was the normal way for a master and disciple to get along, but she just couldn't let it go and felt helpless.

"What do you mean?" Her voice unconsciously rose a few notes, "If you have a hard time, who else can you tell if you don't tell me?"

You Su finally raised his eyes and met the anger in her eyes.

Their eyes met for a brief moment, and then the boy looked away again.

He Shutong thought that the boy didn't dare to look at her because he was afraid that she would be angry like last time, but he didn't know that the boy was afraid that she would see the guilt in his eyes and so he dodged in a hurry.

Of course, You Su would never give up his pursuit of He Shutong. His coldness from beginning to end was just an act.

He Shutong might be satisfied with a relationship that keeps distance in reality but is gentle and submissive in dreams, because this allows her to not have to fear strange looks and moral condemnation, and she can also satisfy her expectations for an intimate relationship with peace of mind.

However, she never thought that the huge gap caused by such a relationship would only make the boy want to make his dream come true even more.

So he came here under the pretext of learning the method of dual cultivation in vitro. He knew that if he wanted to make a breakthrough in his relationship with his master's wife, it would be impossible to do so by just dragging it on.

He must make his mistress realize that he is no longer the little boy who would foolishly stand outside her door and never leave her, because at that time, there would only be her who always kept the door closed in his world. He would imagine that sincerity can move mountains and open stones, and this door would open one day.

But now it's different, he has grown up, he is a man, and a popular man. This door is not open, but other women's doors are open for him.

He could feel He Shutong's anxiety and loss without even looking at her, which made him feel even more distressed despite his joy. But he also knew that being soft-hearted was the worst thing to do when breaking through the barrier.

He finally spoke: "Disciple carries the power of Tai Sui. The seven elders of the snake clan hope to practice dual cultivation with me in order to purify their demon cores. This is related to the return of the snake clan to the sacred mountain, and also to the secret hidden in the disciple. Miss Xueruo and Junior Sister also agreed. However... Disciple does not want to practice dual cultivation with them in reality, so I want to ask Master's wife for the method of external dual cultivation."

He Shutong was surprised to hear that, and her fingertips trembled slightly. She looked at the young man who had his head down all the time, and felt mixed emotions. For a moment, she didn't know what to say, so she just made small talk, but it was full of sourness that she didn't even notice: "Seven elders? That Elder Liu... seems to have gotten a chance to become younger, right? When she came to pick up Ling Ruo, she still looked a little bit old..."

"Yes, Elder Liu is now expected to break through to the upper realm of Huayu. His face is radiant and very beautiful."

He Shutong pursed her lips tightly. She had never thought that the boy praising another woman in front of her would make her so uncomfortable. She seemed to be angry: "What about the other elders?"

"Elder Hua showed her kindness to me from the beginning, and her words were gentle and refreshing. Elder Chi was straightforward, quick-witted, and the easiest to get along with. Elder Yin had the deepest prejudice against me at first, but now she is the one who supports me the most. Elder Zhu rarely speaks, but when she does, she hits the nail on the head, and she is pure by nature. Elder Xiang always smells good, and although she is beautiful, she is not annoying at all. Elder Jin is old-fashioned, but she is the most practical person in the snake tribe, and I respect her the most."

You Su chuckled, "At first I was worried that they were all difficult women to get along with, but now it seems that I was worrying too much."

This laugh was extremely irritating to He Shutong. She was serious when talking to her, but she laughed out loud when talking about them. This made her throat feel bitter, as if she saw You Su lingering among the seven snake demons with different styles.

She picked up the tea, but the whisk stirred up chaotic bubbles in the cup unconsciously because of her impatience. She was completely unaware of it, and instead couldn't help but tremblingly try:

"I have seen them, some are bright and some are gentle, all are first-class beautiful fairies, and they are also benefactors who have protected us. Moreover, both of your Taoist partners have agreed, and the actual dual cultivation effect will be better, so... why are you unwilling?"

The moment he finished speaking, the cicadas outside the bamboo curtain suddenly fell silent. You Su's body stiffened, and he leaned back a little as if he had been hit by something. When he raised his head, his expression was gloomy, the pain on his face was clearly visible, and his voice was soaked with thin ice:

"Could it be that in the eyes of Master's Wife, a former blind man like me could be a person obsessed with beauty?"

He Shutong looked at the boy's lips pursed into a sharp line, and felt as if someone was grabbing her heart hard, causing her to almost breathe in pain.

She wanted to open her mouth to explain, but she saw You Su had already stood up and left, with a tired voice:

"Since Master-wife is unwilling to teach, then forget it. I will find another way to help those elders break through."

Looking at the boy's back as he turned and left, He Shutong felt regret overwhelming her like a tide.

How could she not know what kind of person You Su is?
It was just that You Su kept praising those elders, which made her unable to help but blame You Su for being too easily moved, and being captured so easily by the kindness of those snake elders.

But now that he thought about it, the boy was just answering her questions truthfully. How could those descriptions be biased at all?
She was obviously afraid that You Su would be snatched away by them, so her panic made her lose her composure and say such hurtful words...

"Su'er...stay..."

With a trembling voice, she called out this overly intimate nickname again after a long time.

(End of this chapter)