Literary Master 1978.

Chapter 41 I'm Not a Human Being

The next evening, after dinner, Tao Yumo went into the room of Lin Chaoyang and his wife. With an excited look on her face, she enthusiastically recounted her experiences of attending the poetry symposium today.

“YNU students are particularly brave to speak out!”

"It is generally believed that the problem with current poetry is that it lacks sincerity, avoids social issues, and dares not speak the truth of ordinary people."

"The most in-depth question discussed was 'Where is the future of poetry?' They spoke highly of Ai Qing's "On the Crest of the Wave" and Bai Hua's "Sunshine, No One Can Monopolize It."

……

Lin Chaoyang lost interest in listening to his sister-in-law's endless chatter. He liked reading poetry, but he didn't like this kind of activity that was like taking stimulants.

Tao Yushu, on the other hand, listened very carefully and felt that the information brought back by Tao Yumo was very useful. He could write a review to discuss the current situation and future development of the domestic poetry scene.

After Tao Yumo left, the couple discussed the Chinese New Year. This year's Chinese New Year is on January 1, which is less than twenty days away.

This year is the first year of their marriage, so they should go back to their hometown.

But Tao Yushu just went back in August, and the time interval between going back now is a bit too close.

This is not the key point. The most important point is that it costs money and time.

It would take four or five days to go back and forth. Tao Yushu had time during the winter vacation, but Lin Chaoyang still had to go to work. The time he spent at home might not be as long as the time he spent on the journey.

"I think that instead of spending all the money on the trip, it's better to send the money directly back to my parents."

If we take a hard sleeper back, the round-trip fare for two people will be one hundred yuan, plus shopping, it will cost at least two hundred yuan for a return trip.

Tao Yushu's words surprised Lin Chaoyang, "Send money home?"

"Yeah. Didn't my mother give me 500 yuan before I left? You should also understand how much this 500 yuan means to the old couple.

I was thinking that I could send the money back to them, saying it was your salary, specifically for their parents.”

Lin Chaoyang said, "Send 500 yuan to our family? Then we are out of money, right?"

It’s not that Lin Chaoyang doesn’t want to send money to his parents, but he is concerned about Tao Yushu’s feelings and is afraid that she is just being polite.

"I didn't say I would send it all back. You only send a hundred dollars a year."

He pondered and said, "Think it over carefully. If you want to mail it, you can't stop. After the 500 yuan my parents gave me is used up, I'll have to spend my own money."

"In your heart, am I so reluctant to spend my own money?" Tao Yushu rolled his eyes at him. "My parents are old and live in the countryside. Now that you are not in front of them to show your filial piety, isn't it your duty to mail them some money?"

Lin Chaoyang had never mentioned taking care of his parents in the countryside, so he didn't think Tao Yushu was just being polite. Her words made Lin Chaoyang feel both fortunate and ashamed.

Fortunately, he married a well-educated, virtuous and kind wife. However, he felt ashamed that he only thought about bringing the old couple to Beijing to enjoy a good life when conditions improved in a few years, but he never considered taking care of them in the present. Tao Yushu made up for his shortcomings.

He held Tao Yushu in his arms and said, "Marrying you is the greatest blessing in my life!"

"I think so!"

Tao Yushu looked up at him with a mischievous look on his face.

As the couple was being affectionate, Lin Chaoyang's conscience began to stir again.

Even though I married such a good wife, I still think about setting up a secret fund all day long.

I am really not a human being!
"daughter in law!"

"Hmm?" Tao Yushu snuggled in his arms, her face full of happiness.

"Actually... there's something I've been hiding from you." Lin Chaoyang gritted his teeth.

"what is the matter?"

Lin Chaoyang held her shoulders with both hands, and they looked at each other. Tao Yushu had a confused look in her eyes.

The more she did this, the more guilty Lin Chaoyang felt.

Knowing mistakes can be corrected, and doing good things is great.

He has never made big mistakes since he was a child, but he has made small mistakes all the time. What's wrong with admitting his mistakes?

Comforting himself in this way, Lin Chaoyang spoke with difficulty.

"In fact, during this period, I have been trying to create."

Hearing this, Tao Yushu's eyes lit up and he said happily, "Really? I think you have some talent in literary creation. Have you written any works? Bring them to me for your reference."

When the time came, Lin Chaoyang hesitated again.

Tao Yushu thought that he felt that what he wrote was immature and was embarrassed to show it to others. Every novice has this mentality.

"It doesn't matter. Everyone has a first time. Besides, if you don't trust others, don't you trust me?

I am a college student majoring in Chinese and have published reviews in the Literary Gazette. Let me help you with my professional perspective, which will definitely be more useful than just writing it yourself.”

Tao Yushu looked at Lin Chaoyang with bright eyes, and there were four words flashing in his eyes: a teacher. Lin Chaoyang struggled fiercely in his heart, and at the last moment when his conscience was extinguished, he made a decision in his heart.

He walked to the bookshelf and found the eleventh issue of "Yenching Literature and Art" in 1978, which Tao Yushu had been reading a few days ago.

"What?"

Tao Yushu took the magazine he handed over and asked in confusion.

Lin Chaoyang opened the magazine and turned to the part that published "The Horse Wrangler".

"This..." He pointed at the magazine, his eyes more serious than ever, "I wrote this!"

Tao Yushu looked at the title on the magazine, then looked at her husband in front of her, and felt that she was hallucinating.

“Did you write The Horse Herder?”

Lin Chaoyang nodded firmly, "That's right."

Tao Yushu laughed for some reason, "Don't tease me. I know you have a lot of ideas in literature, but..."

She looked at Lin Chaoyang's serious expression, but couldn't finish the words on her lips. She couldn't help but ask again, "Did you really write it?"

"Replace it if it's fake!"

Tao Yushu examined Lin Chaoyang's expression, and her face gradually became serious. She didn't say anything, but sat down on the edge of the bed, lowered her head and carefully re-read "The Shepherd", which she had read countless times.

Lin Chaoyang was confused by her actions. What did she mean? If you want to kill me, just tell me. What does it mean to keep your head down and read a book?
After two minutes of anxiety, Lin Chaoyang suddenly understood.

He thought of the critical moments in workplace negotiations in later generations, when both sides were on the verge of a fight and tit-for-tat, but neither said a word, waiting for someone to speak first.

The purpose of not speaking is to create psychological pressure on the other person.

Yes, that's right.

I have to stay calm. Everything I do is for the harmony of my family.

More than twenty minutes passed in a flash. Lin Chaoyang thought of a hundred ways to apologize, and Tao Yushu finally turned his eyes from the magazine to him.

The moment he felt the gaze falling on him, Lin Chaoyang subconsciously sat up straight with a righteous look on his face.

"Why are you so nervous?"

"Am I nervous?"

"Aren't you nervous?"

"Not nervous!"

Tao Yushu looked impatient, then raised the magazine in his hand and asked, "Tell me, what's going on?"

"It's a long story..."

"Then let's make a long story short."

Lin Chaoyang sensed the danger and decided to abandon all the sweet talk.

"I was a country boy who married a college student, became the son-in-law of a professor, and was assigned a job at the Yanda Library. I felt that I had to make some progress.

There was no way I could make any progress in my work in the short term. I happened to have some ideas about literary creation, so I wrote a novel and submitted it to Yanjing Literature and Art with a try-it attitude. I didn’t expect that they would actually accept it.”

Listening to Lin Chaoyang's words, Tao Yushu's eyes softened.

She considered herself to be considerate and was well aware that her husband would be under great psychological pressure if he followed her to Yanjing.

But she felt that she might have underestimated the psychological pressure this incident brought to her husband.

Although he spoke very briefly, Tao Yushu could still guess from these few words the depression her husband had been feeling during this period of time.

When Tao Yushu thought about how he was tortured by this matter every day and couldn't sleep or eat, but he still had to pretend to be strong and even had to work hard behind her back, he felt a pang of heartache in his heart.

"Then why didn't you tell me in advance?"

Seeing that Tao Yushu's eyes and words had softened, Lin Chaoyang felt relieved.

This level is halfway through.

"It's just for face! What if the writing is not good and the publication rejects it? It would be so embarrassing."

Tao Yushu smiled and said, "Are you still afraid of losing face? You are such an egomaniac!"

"That's not arrogance, that's confidence."

Just when he relaxed his guard and thought everything was going to be fine, Tao Yushu suddenly asked, "Why didn't you tell me that the novel was published?"

Terrible!

This question is so sharp!
(End of this chapter)