The first thing I did was to find out

Chapter 132 Be Honest with Your Friends

The office was in chaos.

Dean Qu was originally crying, but when Qin Huai pushed the door open and came in, she was so frightened that her tears dried up. She was in a hurry to put gloves on Qu Jing. As soon as she picked up the gloves, she felt that the most urgent thing was to roll up her sleeves.

In a hurry, he used too much force and pressed the gauze on Qu Jing's hand. Qu Jing's hand retracted in pain, and Dean Qu was so scared that he quickly let go.

After all the operations, Dean Qu was holding a half-knitted pair of colorful woolen gloves in his hands. He stood forward and tried to block Qu Jing behind him.

Unlike Dean Qu who was in a hurry to do this and that, wishing he had eight hands, and wishing he was 8 meters tall and weighed 2 kilograms so he could block Qu Jing behind him like a wall, Qu Jing did not react.

The moment Qin Huai came in, she subconsciously pulled her hands behind her back. When she found that Qin Huai's gaze was already on her and she couldn't cover it at all, she resigned herself to her fate, lowered her head and took her hands back.

And Qin Huai showed the best acting skills of his life.

Qin Huai pretended that he had really come in to look for Dean Qu and had accidentally entered. He was a little shocked at first, but he concealed it very well and did not show any overly surprised expression. He glanced at Qu Jing's arm, then quickly looked away, pretending that nothing had happened. He waited calmly for Dean Qu to finish what he had just done, and then he slowly spoke.

"Dean Qu, we have prepared all the materials and are just waiting for the children to come over to make dumplings together. I came to see you and pick up some documents."

Qin Huai dragged out every word he said, sounding like a cautious statement made after careful consideration.

Seeing that Qin Huai was willing to play dumb, Dean Qu breathed a sigh of relief, looked at Qu Jing with some worry, hesitated for a few seconds, as if he had made some kind of decision.

"I'll go call the kids. I'll give you the documents when you leave, Xiao Qin, so as not to dirty the document bag."

"Jingjing...please help me greet Xiao Qin, go...go...go and pour him a cup of tea...No, yes...yes...yes, I'll go get someone, please help greet him."

Then Dean Qu left.

He walked away quickly without looking back, as if he was afraid that if he hesitated for a second, he would not be able to leave the office.

Qu Jing and Qin Huai were the only two people left in the office.

Qin Huai knew that it was time to test the favorability.

He believed that Qu Jing's consumption of glutinous rice cakes, jujube paste and yam cakes, and tangerine peel tea during this period were not in vain, and her conversations with the old men were not in vain.

Qu Jing didn't say anything, nor did she cover her arms. The two of them just stood quietly in the office. The air was silent, as quiet as death.

"Will you come to the cafeteria tomorrow?" Qin Huai asked. "I'll make glutinous rice cakes with jujube paste and yam fillings, but you may have to come later. Wait for me to go back and make the rice cakes. I guess we won't be able to eat the rice cakes tomorrow until eight or nine in the morning."

"And there's a good chance I won't be able to get up tomorrow morning and will have to go to work late."

Qu Jing looked up, wanting to see if Qin Huai was pretending to be calm and changing the subject or if he was really relaxed. She looked at Qin Huai's expression for a full minute or two, and asked with trembling lips:
"Don't you find it scary?"

"It's quite scary." Qin Huai nodded.

Qu Jing finally breathed a sigh of relief and bit her lips, making her already bloodless lips even paler.

"I don't have any UV allergy at all."

Qin Huai said: "I can guess it, and I guessed it a long time ago."

Qu Jing poured Qin Huai a glass of water, motioned for Qin Huai to sit down, slowly took off the glove on the other hand, and rolled up the sleeve to expose the skin.

The hands were also covered with scars, with new wounds overlapping old ones.

"I've been like this since I was very young," Qu Jing said. "I don't remember the exact date, but I remember that I didn't get full marks in math in elementary school. I was very angry, very sad, and hated myself very much."

"I didn't know why I was so sad. I didn't sleep that night. I ran to the kitchen secretly and cut a deep cut on my arm with a knife. The blood was all over the floor."

"By the time I realized what I had done, I had already bled a lot. Blood was dripping down my hands as I wiped them. I knew I couldn't hide it anymore, so I went to find Dean Qu."

"She took me to a small clinic to bandage my wound and bought me some candy to cheer me up, but it didn't work at all. From then on, whenever I didn't do well in a test, couldn't finish my homework, or felt like I couldn't concentrate on my studies, I would think of the feeling when the knife stabbed into my arm that day."

"It hurts, but the pain makes me sober, happy and calm." "I started to lose control, I couldn't control myself. Many times I felt unconscious when I held the knife, and when I realized what I had done, my hands were already covered in blood."

"At first, Dean Qu took me to a small clinic, but later she didn't dare to take me to the clinic anymore. She bought a medical kit and learned bandaging by herself."

"She didn't understand what mental illness was. She thought I was being bullied at school, so she bought me candies, cakes, dolls, and new clothes. She knitted me a lot of gloves and bought me a lot of long sleeves to help me cover the wounds on my body. She called the teacher and lied to him that I couldn't go out in the sun and didn't have to attend physical education classes."

"But people still saw me. One time, I didn't put on my gloves properly after class and a classmate saw the scar on my hand. He was shocked. When the teacher found out, he thought I was being abused in the orphanage and called the police."

"I was already in junior high school at that time. The police told Dean Qu that I might have psychological problems, so Dean Qu took me to see a psychiatrist."

"Is it useful?" Qin Huai asked.

Qu Jing shook her head: "I was prescribed a lot of medicine and took it every day, but I still couldn't control myself."

"I don't know why. I can't explain it clearly. When I was in junior high school, my classmates said I was a monster. Later, I transferred to another school."

Qu Jing looked at the scar on her hand and said, "I'm very happy that you, Qin Huai... together with Sister Hong and Mr. Luo, care about me so much and are willing to be friends with me. My emotions have been very stable during this period, and I haven't hurt myself for a long time."

"I thought I was fine."

"But a few days ago, I saw a patient with Alzheimer's disease in my outpatient clinic. His condition was very serious. His granddaughter was already in college, but in his memory, she was still a junior high school student. He called his son every afternoon to ask him to pick up his granddaughter from school."

"He was not treated in our hospital before. His son thought the patient was too annoying and specifically called my clinic to ask if there was any way to make his father feel better."

"I can not do anything."

"I was very upset when I got home that night. I couldn't read a single word of the papers on my computer. I hated my incompetence and uselessness. I hated that I was focusing on this area but I couldn't cure any patient and could only control the progression of the disease."

"When I started to feel better, my arm was like this again."

Qu Jing looked at Qin Huai: "Maybe my classmates are right, I am a monster."

Qin Huai could only remain silent, he didn't know what to say.

What could he say? He knew that Qu Jing might have done this because of her obsession.

She didn't remember her previous memories and had forgotten the reason for doing this, but her body and consciousness, or the self-rescue instinct as a spirit, reminded her in this way to save herself.

But as Chen Huihong said, those involved are often confused, so even if he said so, Qu Jing would not believe it.

Qin Huai picked up the gloves on the table and handed them to Qu Jing.

"Let's go make dumplings. The children in the welfare home should already be working. We two can't be lazy."

Qu Jing forced a smile: "Thank you."

"Will you tell Sister Hong and Mr. Luo?" Qu Jing asked.

"Do you want me to tell them?" Qin Huai asked back.

Qu Jing thought about it and nodded: "Go ahead, Mr. Luo is so smart, you can't fool him by lying to him."

"And if Mother Qu knew that my friends knew my secret and didn't mind, she would probably feel happier."

"She has been blaming herself for many years, thinking that it was because she didn't take me to see a psychologist right away that I ended up like this."

"She is the person I feel most sorry for, and I don't want to make her even more sad."

Qu Jing put on gloves, rolled down her sleeves, put on a mask, and returned to her previous attire.

"Let's go make dumplings."

(End of this chapter)