Online game I am Sun Wukong

Liu Juan opened the mission scroll, which said to find Tang Seng in Dongtu Tang Dynasty.

Liu Juan remembers that Tang Monk, surnamed Chen and named Wei, was born in AD 00.His elder brother was a monk in the Pure Land Temple in Luoyang, so he also became a monk when he was 15 years old, and took a Buddhist name, Xuanzang.

Monk Xuanzang traveled all over China's Yangtze and Yellow River valleys, learning Buddhist teachings from many eminent monks.

However, the explanations of Buddhist scriptures vary from school to school, and the translations of various Buddhist scriptures often differ from each other, and many Buddhist scriptures have not yet been translated into Chinese.

Therefore, he decided to travel westward to India to learn the true meaning of Buddhism and intensively read the original scriptures.

The imperial court did not approve Xuanzang's application to go abroad.So, alone, he secretly embarked on a journey of thousands of miles in [-].

Liu Juan still remembers some jokes on the Internet:

[Tang monk, master and apprentice went through ninety-nine and 81 difficulties and finally met the Tathagata Buddha to seek the scriptures.

Tathagata asked: "Have you brought a USB flash drive?"

Tang monk master and apprentice. . . .

Tathagata asked again: "Where is the mobile hard disk?"

. . . . .

Tathagata continued to ask: "Ipod can also wow"

Goku digs his ears

Tathagata sighed: "Then you can go back the same way, I will use QQ to send it to you."

Tang Seng: Damn, if I knew it would be over if I added you to QQ, why would I go so far.

When the four were about to leave, the Buddha suddenly asked: Have you brought a psp? The four replied: No.The Buddha was surprised: How boring, how did you come here?

The four looked at each other and said: We upgraded from fighting monsters all the way.

. . . . . . . . n Difficulty after. . . . .

After Tang Seng went back, he added Tathagata QQ and found that it was very slow.

Tathagata made a phone call: Hey, Xiaotang, you are Tietong 56k

Xiao Tang: Yes, it was only installed last year.

Tathagata: , you should come again

After going back, Tang Seng opened QQ and found that Tathagata had not passed

So q Tathagata: Is it because our network is too poor to transmit?

Tathagata said: Then you come again, bring a USB flash drive

So Tang Seng and his disciples took the USB disk and went through ninety-nine and eighty-one hardships again, and finally saw the Tathagata Buddha

Tathagata asked: "Have you brought a USB flash drive?"

Tang Monk Master and Apprentice: "Bring it"

Tathagata continued to ask, "How big is it?"

Tang Seng Master and Apprentice: "2g"

Tathagata sighed deeply: "The scriptures are too big, but the USB flash drive is too small, take a 4G one with you when you go back."

. . . . . . . . . .

So Tang Seng and his disciples brought a mobile hard disk when they went back, and it was still 1000g.

Thinking: Damn, I will bring you back as many sutras as I have this time

The group experienced ninety-nine and eighty-one hardships again and finally saw the Tathagata Buddha

Tathagata asked, "Why are you here again?"

Tang Seng and his disciples: "Didn't you tell us to bring a larger USB flash drive? We brought a 1000g hard drive."

Tathagata continued to ask: "Didn't you open QQ when you went back?"

Tang Seng and his disciples: "After we went back, we bought a hard drive and came here."

Tathagata sighed deeply: "Damn, a bunch of idiots, I left you a message in QQ, and the scriptures have been placed on my server

Now, you can download it as you like! "

. . . . . . . . . .

After Tang Seng and his disciples went back, they opened Tathagata's server to download, and found that the server was infected with a Trojan horse and could not be downloaded.

So I took the 1000g hard drive and continued on the road, thinking: If I had known this, I would have fucked it back, this time no matter what

gotta bake back

After ninety-nine and eighty-one hardships, I finally saw the Tathagata

Tathagata asked, "Have you brought any paper?"

. . . . .

Tathagata continued: "Hey, this time the server was hit by a Trojan horse, and the electronic version of the scriptures was completely destroyed. I think you should copy a copy by hand.

Let's go! ”

. . . . . . .

then the previous continuation

Tang Seng and his disciples have learned well this time, bought the paper, brought the hard drive and set off on the road; before, they sent a message to Tathagata with QQ to confirm

recognize

After ninety-nine and 81 difficulties, I saw the Tathagata again

To prevent any change, Tang Seng spoke first: "Has the Trojan horse been cracked?"

Tathagata: "No"

Tang Seng: "Then we can copy it?"

Tathagata: "Yes"

It took Tang Monk and his disciples 10 years to finally copy the scriptures and prepare to bid farewell to Tathagata

Tang Seng: "It took us 10 years to copy the scriptures, and now we bid farewell to the Buddha and return to the Tang Dynasty"

Tathagata "...",

"A bunch of idiots, why not use a copy machine?"】

There are also some dizzy effects:

【Tang Seng: Wukong, you should become a BMW. It’s raining, so you can’t ride a horse.

Tang's monk: Wukong, you should become a condom. Today, as a teacher, I will personally clean up this female fairy.

Tang's monk: Wukong, you should become Viagra. Today, as a teacher, I have to personally deal with this female fairy until she begs for mercy.

Tang Seng: Today is so boring. . .Goku. . .You become a banshee. . .

One day when passing through the desert, Tang Seng clamored for a female fairy, but the surrounding area was desolate, let alone a fairy, not even an ant could be found.

Tang's monk: Wukong. . .You become a banshee!

Wukong refused.

Tang Seng went to Bajie again, and Bajie slipped away to do push-ups on the pretext of losing weight.

I went to find the Drifting Monk, but the Drifting Monk ran away on the pretext of making soy sauce.

Tang Seng was angry, and found Wukong when he came back: Wukong, if you don't become a female fairy again, you will have to recite the magic spell for your teacher!

Wukong thought for a while, and turned Zhu Bajie, who was doing push-ups, into a female goblin.

Tang Seng and a female goblin were having a hot fight, but unexpectedly, he had premature ejaculation.Tang Seng was very depressed.

Come out to find Wukong: Wukong, quickly become Viagra!

Without even thinking about it, Wukong directly turned Zhu Bajie into Viagra.

One morning, Tang Seng nagged again that he wanted a female fairy.Wukong was annoyed by his nagging, so he went out to look for it, and after a while, he brought back a female fairy and sent it to Tang Seng's tent.

Tang Seng fought fiercely until evening before coming out satisfied.

Wukong: Master, is the female goblin desirable?

Tang's monk: It's okay, it's white and plump, but it just doesn't move, talk, or make a bed!

Suddenly, the Drifting Monk came over in a hurry: Master, senior brother, the second senior brother disappeared in the morning. I searched for a whole day but couldn't find him. I don't know where he went!

Zhu Bajie is always turned into a female fairy and asked Tang Seng to do it. He is annoyed by it, and always wants to find opportunities for revenge.

One day, Tang Seng clamored for the female fairy again, Wukong and Drifting went out to look for it, but Zhu Bajie ran slowly and was caught by Tang Seng.Helpless, she had no choice but to become a female fairy again.But Tang Seng got excited and insisted on Zhu Bajie's mouth. Zhu Bajie was very angry and bit off Tang Seng's cock with one bite, causing Tang Seng to roll on the ground in pain.At this time, Wukong and Drifting came back with two flowery and jade-like female fairies, Tang Seng jumped up from the ground and shouted: Quickly turn Bajie into my jj, as a teacher, I will personally clean up these two female fairies today!

Whenever Tang Seng wanted to pass by, the banshees would run away upon hearing the news, so Tang Seng often failed to do so.One night, Tang Seng got up to relieve himself, and suddenly saw Zhu Bajie having sex with a banshee in his arms. . .Tang Seng was furious: Bajie retreated!As a teacher, I have to clean up this female fairy myself!

Bajie was in high spirits, begging: Master, can't we have a threesome together?

Tang's monk: yes!

So I turned Zhu Bajie into a female fairy again]