Bringing my kids to set up stalls, I made thousands of people cry with envy

Chapter 325: Filial Sons and Good Grandsons, You Deserve to Die

Funeral home security office.

Early in the morning, Lao Zhou couldn't sit still.

It’s not that I have hemorrhoids, it’s just that this job is too tiring.

They have to go out every five minutes to interrogate the visitors and constantly identify whether they are relatives of the deceased.

Oh my god, why hasn’t my old partner come yet? Time seems to be passing slower than a snail.

"Old Zhou, Old Zhou!"

The head of security suddenly pushed the door open and slammed the thermos cup onto the table, shocking Old Zhou Yi.

Without saying a word, he pulled up the surveillance video.

In the picture, many people entered the museum holding flower baskets. No tears were seen, but they were smiling so hard that their back teeth were exposed.

"Look at this!" The section chief fast-forwarded to a certain scene, "The girl is holding a black takeout box. Why did you let her in?"

Old Zhou’s neck shrank.

I remember the girl said with tears in her eyes that this was an urn specially bought for her grandfather. I thought it was very beautiful at that time.

Shit, I got cheated!
"and this……"

The section chief played another clip, "This young man appeared to be in mourning, but he took off the mourning clothes as soon as he entered the house. He was wearing a trendy T-shirt underneath!"

As Lao Zhou listened, sweat began to appear on his forehead.

He remembered the young man, who cried so heartbreakingly that he almost wiped his snot on him.

Damn it, these bastards, are they making a fool of me? !

The section chief shook his head in disappointment and then clicked on his phone screen.

As a middle-aged and elderly person suffering from severe internet addiction, his usual hobby is to open Douyin and watch Erxiao Qingcheng.

It was his previous subconscious action that made him discover this big one.

on video.

A bowl of steaming crispy rice noodles was placed directly in front of the screen. The rice noodles were snow-white and translucent, while the crispy rice noodles were reddish-brown and crunchy. The camera zoomed in and the chewing sound exploded in the mouth, making people's scalps numb.

The background is the funeral home cafeteria where they are.

Everyone shows off their talents in the comment section.

"Hehe, this pink sparrow food is awesome. I successfully sneaked in by cosplaying as a filial son today. This wave of profit is huge!"

"Here's the latest guide for my friends! Wear mourning clothes and hold chrysanthemums to use the VIP channel."

"I recommend you to go left from the funeral home. There is a 'funeral hut'. The chrysanthemums there are the most affordable. 8 yuan a bunch. 3 bunches for 20 yuan. Don't be ripped off."

"Well, there's no need to go through so much trouble. The old security guard is very sensitive. He will let you in after crying a few times. That's how the five of us got in."

Lao Zhou:......

His reading glasses slipped to the tip of his nose and he lost consciousness.

“Young people are like this nowadays.”

It turns out that all those bastards were lying to him!!!
Damn it!

"Now you know they are crazy, right?"

The section chief continued speaking earnestly.

"So our security department needs to strengthen management. In addition to normal identification of family relationships, we must also pay attention to analyzing micro-expressions to determine whether crying is real or fake."

Lao Zhou:? ? ?
What the hell!

He is just an old security guard who is just doing nothing.

Not the police!
Old Zhou wanted to cry but had no tears. He was confused and tried to struggle.

"Look at my old age, my eyes are blurry... What if the real family members are stopped outside..."

The section chief was not willing to give him a chance to back out and simply blocked his question with one sentence.

“That’s why we need to actively receive training!”

"Look, there are so many people coming into our cafeteria now. If their families can't get noodles soon, they'll complain again..."

Old Zhou opened his mouth and wanted to say something.

The section chief had already stood up and patted him on the shoulder. "Okay, Lao Zhou, go have some breakfast first, then open the materials and study hard. I'm counting on you. By the way, the training fee of 100 yuan will be deducted from your salary."

Lao Zhou:......

MMP! ! !

He was the one who was cheated, so it's also him who had the money deducted.

He was shaking with rage.

He simply slammed the table, ran straight to the cafeteria, and brought back a bowl of hot minced meat noodles.

"Okay, okay, if you keep playing like this, I'm going to fight you today!"

Lao Zhou sat down in the security room and placed the bowl of noodles in front of him.

Roll up your sleeves and prepare to start studying how to strengthen management after dinner.

A wave of "filial sons and grandchildren" is coming.

The little girl sobbed. "Uncle, I'm here to see my grandpa off."

Lao Zhou was about to ask a question when he suddenly smelled a sweet scent of perfume.

Take a closer look.

Wow, she even put on full makeup and the thick dark line around her eyes wasn’t blurred at all.

"Don't make it up. If your grandfather knew you were cursing him over a bowl of noodles, he would beat you to death."

The girl blushed and turned and ran away.

that's it.

After summarizing his experience, Lao Zhou successfully identified this group of "family members".

Hehe, he let you off before, but Old Zhou doesn’t specifically let you off!

The frustration in his heart dissipated a lot, and he returned to the table and picked up a handful of rice noodles with chopsticks.

The rice noodles absorbed the broth and slid into my mouth smoothly. As soon as the tip of my tongue touched the oily texture, a tingling sensation ran through the back of my head.

The crispy whistles are fried like they are coated with a layer of amber sugar, with a crispy texture and a chewy texture, and a salty fragrance with a hint of sweet wine.

As expected, Lao Zhou enjoyed the meal very much.

Those diners who were discovered by him were also drooling and very greedy.

Just eat it, the key is the smacking sound in your mouth, which makes you want to bite back!

Do you have any sense of public morality?
Don’t you know there are a group of starving ghosts nearby?
This old guy is not afraid of dying of stuffiness!
The diners were so angry that they simply covered their ears and thought of a solution.

The ears were blocked, but the problem was that there were still two holes on the nose.

The strong aromas were like two omnipresent ghosts, drilling into their noses and digging in the places they were most greedy for...

Ah...I'm going crazy!

I've never been so jealous of a job at a funeral home as I am today!

"uncle……"

There was a diner who was unwilling to give up and approached Lao Zhou unwillingly and asked.

"Old man, do you need someone to keep watch at night? Or someone to make up the corpses? Anyone who can burn the stove will do."

"Yes, the work in the funeral home is very suitable for us young people. We don't have to contact people, the boss doesn't show up often, and the customers we face don't talk. If the customer talks, then we will get more angry. This is simply the ideal job for someone like me!"

"Yes, yes, yes. It's impossible not to go crazy when working. It's better to deal with the dead. It doesn't matter if the daily salary is 2,000 or not, as long as I can eat noodles..."

Old Zhou raised his eyes and glanced at the young people who were stopped by him, looking at them as if they were fools.

"Oh, do you really think it's a good job here?
Every line of work has its own difficulties.

I have seen so many dead people working here, whether they were burned to death, or had epilepsy, or were highly corrupted. To be honest, these are really a test of one's psychological endurance."

He paused, picked up a piece of crispy food and put it into his mouth, chewing it with a crunching sound.

"Not to mention, I just deducted a hundred yuan in training fees in order to see through you!"

……

(End of this chapter)