I logged into Mr. Zombie

"Blow up a ball, blow up a big balloon, blow up a big balloon and play with it!"

Wangcai rode his bicycle, singing as he traveled at night.

Ever since he heard that riding a bike at night could easily lead to encounters with female ghosts and romantic encounters, he has fallen in love with this nighttime sport.

I'm so attractive because I love being fit and healthy. What if I attract the attention of several female ghosts at the same time?

"I wonder if the secret medicine that Brother Dachang gave me can really help."

He was thinking about the exciting night when he suddenly heard someone yelling in the distance, as if they were talking about catching perverts.

"Salty?"

Wangcai's eyes widened.

How infuriating! Someone beat me to it... Ugh, I mean, someone is so infuriating! It's enough to make me envious!
He pushed off with his foot, and the car sped off a long distance.

Sure enough, around the corner ahead, a disheveled figure staggered and fled.

The opponent seemed to have been crippled, bouncing up and down, but his lightness skill seemed quite good, as he leaped a full ten feet high.

"Well, so you're a thief who steals flowers from the roof beam!" Wangcai kept pedaling furiously, his hands already off the handlebars, and he suddenly leaped up the moment he got close to the other person.

They grabbed each other with both hands.

"Hahaha, I've got you!"

He looked up, only to be hit in the face by the overwhelming stench of corpses. His skin felt itchy and numb. He tried to open his eyes wide and saw a distorted, bluish-gray zombie face looking down at him, with fangs the length of a little finger.

"Zombies?!"

Wangcai yelled "Wow!" His arms went weak and his body slid down. At the same time, his eyes looked down instinctively and he saw that he had already taken off into the air, flying close to the ground at an extremely fast speed.

He quickly grabbed the zombie's legs with both hands to prevent it from falling.

But the zombies sped along, completely ignoring him, their rear ends constantly scraping against the ground.

After walking through the stone-paved streets of Tanjia Town and brushing against the deserted paths, my pants were worn through with two holes, and my white buttocks bounced up and down in the night sky.

On a riverbank, a naked woman was posing seductively. A man who had just finished get off work was captivated by the beautiful scenery reflected in the water. His eyes glazed over, and his body moved involuntarily toward the white expanse.

"Come on~ come on~" The woman's red lips parted slightly, her voice sending shivers down your spine.

"My beauty, I'm here!" The man reached for his belt, but suddenly heard a scream behind him.

When he turned around, he saw two figures fly out of the woods and crash into the beauty by the river.

The man's eyes widened: "Holy crap, both of you coming at me at once? So impatient!"

"Oh!"

The two figures that flew out collided with the naked woman on the riverbank and dragged her into the middle of the river.

"Hey, hey, hey!" the man yelled, "Wait for me! Count me in! Me too!!"

He waded through the water for quite a distance, but eventually had to return to the shore because the water was too cold.

"You two bastards, don't let me catch you!"

As soon as they climbed ashore, a group of people dressed in Taoist robes and carrying guns surrounded them.

"Gentlemen, what's going on?" the man asked with a smile.

One of the girls frowned and glanced down, saying with disdain, "Hey, why aren't you wearing pants?"

The man then realized that he had been in such a hurry to run to the river that his belt had come undone. He looked around and saw his belt hanging on a tree branch, swaying in the wind and emitting a foul odor.

As for the pants...

Looking back, I saw my pants drifting further and further away with the current.

"My pants!"

"Don't rush, Xiaoyue, don't speak yet." One of them stepped forward and said, "Did you just see a zombie and a young Taoist priest who bravely hugged it?"

"No." The man shook his head.

"No?" *N
He pointed to the river with a bitter face: "I only saw two lecherous men, even more lustful than me, running away with the beauty I had just met."

Everyone: "..."

They looked at each other, their eyes filled with confusion.

"It must be Wangcai and a zombie."

"What do we do now?"

"Ah Xing, you and Xiao Yue go back and inform the others to take a car downstream to intercept them. The rest of us will chase after them. We can't afford to let Wang Cai get into danger; time is of the essence."

"Okay, let's do it this way!"

The group split in two and vanished without a trace in a few flashes.

The remaining man shook his head: "A whole group of people? And women too? That's some fancy stuff."

He beat his chest in frustration, thinking to himself that if he had run faster, he could have gone home naked.

On the other side, Wangcai clung tightly to the zombie's ankle, but the zombie was in poor condition and nearly fell into the water several times, causing Wangcai to choke on water a few times.

Suddenly, a pair of hands climbed up and hugged Wangcai's neck.

He turned his head and looked back, and saw a pair of large snowflakes, with visible blue veins.

"Was this a beautiful dream I had before I died?"

When Wangcai turned his gaze upwards, he saw a woman's face that was swollen and constantly vomiting black liquid.

"vomit!"

It's a water ghost!
This is terrible, we're surrounded by enemies.

The female water ghost ignored all that and grabbed Wangcai by the neck, trying to drag him into the water.

Wangcai could only cling tightly to the zombie's ankle.

He had indeed considered letting go of the water and jumping in to escape, since zombies hate water and it can wash away the human scent on them. But that wouldn't work now; falling into the water would mean certain death, while hanging on the zombie's leg would at least prolong his life.

Suddenly, the force on his head increased, and Wangcai felt as if his neck was being stretched infinitely, and it no longer belonged to him at all.

"Glug glug glug..."

His head was submerged in water, and large amounts of foul-smelling water and mud were poured into his mouth, making his belly grow rounder and rounder, and causing him more and more pain.

Consciousness gradually faded.

I never imagined that my lifelong reputation would end like this, before I even got to kiss him!
……

"Wangcai!"

Hearing someone calling his name, Wangcai gradually regained consciousness.

"He looks like he's drowning, his belly is so round." It was Xiaoyue who spoke.

To be fair, as the only female disciple of Zixia Temple, Xiaoyue was always doted on by her fellow disciples, and besides, Xiaoyue herself was very beautiful.

"Should we give him CPR?"

What is artificial respiration?

"Just breathe on him mouth-to-mouth so he doesn't suffocate."

Listening to the discussion, Wangcai, who was about to open his eyes, decided to close them for the time being. Xiaoyue's voice was right next to his ear, which meant that Xiaoyue would personally help him in a while.

The old man was right after all. He turned misfortune into blessing; not only did he survive, but he also got to kiss someone today.

Gradually, Wangcai felt a breath approaching.

Getting closer.

His mouth was dry and his heart was racing.

It's now!

Wangcai suddenly opened its eyes and pouted, pushing its head forward.

Such soft lips... Hmm? Why do they feel a little prickly?

"You're awake?" Xiao Hai blinked his little eyes.

Their eyes met, both filled with astonishment.

Xiao Hai was taken aback; the person woke up before he could even begin artificial respiration. Is this how CPR works?

As for Wangcai...

"Ptooey, ptooey, ptooey!" Wangcai wiped his mouth with his sleeve, disgusted, "Why is it you!"

"Who else could it be but me?" Xiao Hai asked in confusion. "They didn't pay attention in class, only I understood."

Wangcai: "..."

For the first time, he felt the malice that comes from not studying hard.

Turning to look at Xiaoyue, I realized that she was curiously leaning close to stare at me and Xiaohai, her cheeks slightly flushed, as if she was thinking about something inappropriate for children.

I never expected you to be like this, Xiaoyue!

"By the way, what about that zombie?" Wangcai asked.

He couldn't admit that he was looking for a romantic encounter and had accidentally mistaken a zombie for a womanizer.

One's lifelong reputation is the most important thing.

“Someone has already gone after him,” Xiao Hai said. “A tight net has been laid; he definitely can’t escape.”

The distant lights were bright, indicating that the main force had surrounded the zombie. Judging from the gunshots and cannon fire, the battle had entered a fierce stage.

"I put in so much effort, and it almost got away!" Wangcai stood up and said, "Let's go catch the zombie!"

If I didn't get a romantic encounter, I absolutely had to get fame.

A group of people strode forward aggressively, only to see the cinnabar cannons blasting at the zombie, causing it to crackle and pop all over its body.

"Alright, I'll do it!" Seeing this, Wangcai grabbed a peach wood sword from the side and rushed forward, "Don't anyone try to take it from me!"

But he had only run a few steps when he heard a roar, the roar of a zombie.

The zombie actually flew out, smashed the cinnabar cannon with one claw, and sent several people flying. Looking at its body, it was only slightly disheveled and did not suffer any serious injuries.

"Roar?" The zombie turned to look at Wangcai, who was holding a sword.

The others, in perfect unison, stepped back a dozen steps, allowing Wangcai to stand out and engage in a one-on-one duel with the zombie.

A voice came from behind: "Wangcai, no one's going to take it from you, it's yours now."

Zombie: (◣◢)

Wangcai: (﹏)
Everyone: (｀з)з)з)
"Help me—!"

Whizzing--

Paper figures flew in and entangled the zombie.

There were so many paper figures that in the blink of an eye, they wrapped the zombie up like a mummy, completely sealing it in.

"Phew." Wangcai breathed a sigh of relief.

Everyone looked up at the flying figure, which was none other than Yue Qiluo, the pretty little girl who never spoke in the Tan family mansion and only kept her head down cutting paper.

They knew of Yue Qiluo, but only assumed she was another beauty by Tan Wenjie's side. They never expected her to have such strength.

"Hmph." Wangcai smugly approached the zombie, poked its chest, and said, "Come and bite me if you dare! Bite me!"

Yue Qiluo's expression was serious: "Be careful, these paper figures won't hold it for long, it's the Zombie King!"

"Roar!" Before the words were even finished, the zombie had already broken free of its restraints.

Wangcai, who was closest, was the first to be caught. The corpse claws pierced his wrists and dug into his skin, causing him excruciating pain.

"Aww—!" Wangcai howled in pain.

Seeing this, the others dared not delay any longer and immediately rushed forward. Some grabbed the zombie's throat, some held its chin, some dragged its legs, and some even put their arms around its waist.

They worked together, trying to stop the zombie king from biting Wangcai while attempting to knock it down.

However, the power gap between the two sides was too great, and these accessories had no effect on the zombie king.

"boom!"

A golden light suddenly struck, and the zombie king fell straight down, pressing down on everyone, motionless.

"I'm about to be crushed to death."

Why did it suddenly stop moving?

"Wait, what's that on his head?"

"It looks like Master Tan's seal."

"seal?"

Everyone looked in the direction from which the seal had been thrown.

Xiao Hai, who was being stared at by several people, explained, "This was given to me by my master. He said he wanted me to help verify the expenses of Zixia Temple. This is to be sent to the accountant of the Tan family after verification. First, it needs to be stamped, and then it will be sent over. My master also told me that if there are any things that I can't handle, I should throw away the stamp. Master Tan has a noble destiny, and many ghosts and monsters dare not provoke him."

Even if his destiny is noble, it's a bit too noble for the Zombie King to be afraid of him. Is he some kind of Emperor of Fengdu?

Yue Qiluo asked, "What's printed on it?"

Xiao Hai replied, "It's the name 'Tan Wenjie'."

Yue Qiluo: "..."

Her name alone possessed the power to subdue a zombie king, and she realized that she still knew too little about Tan Wenjie.

……

"Of course it's too little."

After several rounds of drinks and five courses of food,

Tan Wenjie waved his hand and said to Uncle Jiu, Simu and the others, "We should not only vigorously develop the ghost-catching industry, but also industrialize it. It would be best to train more disciples so that everyone has the ability to catch ghosts."

The world's level has already been raised; improving the overall strength of the population and responding to crises is now the most important thing.

The group of people in front of us is the backbone.

Everyone just nodded in agreement.

They dared not imagine such a scene. If things really developed as Tan Wenjie said at the banquet, everyone present, even Qiu Sheng and Wen Cai, could become "grandmasters"!
With so many apprentices, it's hard to have a low seniority.

"Uncle-Master, are you saying that I can become a great figure with disciples all over the world?" Four Eyes' eyes lit up. "That brat Ah Le, I've been giving him a headache for a long time. I really want to take on a few obedient and useful disciples."

"When the time comes, I'll make you the principal, not just here, but across Eurasia, to America, to Osborneia, to Mosshima!"

"I used to think that I had nowhere to use my talents, but now that I've met my master, I know why I learned all these skills, sob sob sob."

"Stop crying." Uncle Nine reprimanded his junior brother coldly, "How can we, as cultivators, be greedy for fame and fortune?"

Si Mu wiped his eyes somewhat awkwardly.

He wasn't embarrassed because his sycophantic intentions had been exposed; after all, everyone gathered here today to flatter and gain some benefits—"The immortal touched my head, and I received eternal life."

It's free to pat someone, and if they pat you back, you can instantly ascend to heaven.

It's worth it to flatter someone and then slap yourself on the back!

He was embarrassed because he had been sobbing for a long time but hadn't managed to squeeze out a single tear. His acting was terrible, and he might be at the bottom of the list for flattery today.

Uncle Nine looked at Tan Wenjie with a solemn expression and said, "Our master taught us to teach our disciples in order to uphold righteousness and ward off evil, for the sake of all living beings. Master, isn't that right?"

Tan Wenjie: "..."

So you're like this too, Ah Jiao's junior apprentice.

Feeling the expectant gazes of everyone, Tan Wenjie nodded gently: "Don't worry, everyone, each of you is an important talent."

Magic Mountain? That's too simplistic; the scale is insufficient.

He wanted everyone to possess magical abilities, to gather talented people together, and to keep useful demons and monsters in captivity.

As long as one's power is strong enough, one can suppress all dissenting voices.

Even if I'm not here, I can still respond promptly when faced with danger.

People like Ikkyu and Uncle Nine already held divine positions in other worlds, so there shouldn't be much of an obstacle to them being deified again.

The candlelight flickered gently on Tan Wenjie's head.

This is a side job, and it looks promising! (End of Chapter)