A Manual for Surviving a Weird World

Chapter 411 Grinding Tofu

"They were taken away?" Xu Beichen frowned, his expression puzzled. "So, there are no more ghosts in the mortuary now?"

“Yeah, if there weren’t any obstacles blocking the way, why would the train stop?” Miao Miaomiao added.

—The Time Worm only sets stops at times and places where strange events occur; there shouldn't be no ghosts here.

"Who knows?" Qin Shou shrugged. "Maybe they're waiting for me to collect the bodies and give funerals to the villagers?"

"A funeral?" Ning Zhe tilted his head.

"Funeral procession".

Qin Shou tilted his head and pointed with his chin at the stage in front of him: "That ghost's rules are related to the dead. Although it was taken away by the strange man not long ago, its influence still lingers in this village. Every villager here has been affected by it. If so many corpses are not properly handled, something bad will happen."

Xu Beichen nodded slightly and said, "On the other hand, as long as all the villagers here are properly buried, the ghost's influence on the mortuary will completely disappear, and the train can continue its journey, right?"

"Maybe, I can't guarantee it." Qin Shou shrugged; he didn't like making promises. "So, are you guys going to lend me a hand?"

Upon hearing this, both Ding Wei and Miao Miaomiao turned to look at Ning Zhe.

Ning Zhe smiled and said, "Why not?"

"Thank you very much for your help." Qin Shou finally smiled, and then he briefly explained the process of arranging a funeral for the villagers:
"First are the offerings for the overnight stay."

The corpses of these villagers are under some strange influence; their condition is very unstable. We should place enough offerings in front of each family's coffin before nightfall. Once the dead are full, they will lie obediently in their coffins and won't crawl out to find food in the middle of the night.

"Then there is the stage in front."

There's a custom here of performing for ghosts. I've already set up the stage. Tomorrow at noon, when the yin energy is at its peak, all the wandering ghosts in the village will gather below the stage.

I will sing them a scene from "The Tale of the White Robe," and after they've heard this last act in the human world, the ghosts can go on their way.

"Finally, there is the funeral procession."

Beneath the stage where ghosts gather, underworld officials from the netherworld will stand guard with tokens, watching over these spirits to prevent them from escaping in the chaos and causing harm to the human world.

After the show ended, these same same underworld officials were responsible for escorting these ghosts to the underworld.

At this point, Qin Shou paused, then said, "The biggest problem lies here."

"How so?" Ning Zhe asked.

"The underworld messenger was also killed by that strange man before," Qin Shou said. "Now the village is full of wandering ghosts with no one to look after them. I'm afraid that as soon as I step onto the stage tomorrow, before the play even begins, all the elders and villagers of the mortuary will have run away. Then the funeral procession will be canceled."

"Then, what should we do..." Miao Miaomiao's face was full of fear, and she immediately lost her composure.

Qin Shou laughed and waved his hand, saying, "Come with me."

The group followed him into the room, where they found scattered bamboo strips, paint, paper, scissors, and other materials and tools. Four paper figures—two black and two white—stood against the wall; two had faces painted on them, while the other two had blank faces. "I originally planned to make a few paper figures and place them under the stage to impersonate underworld officials and keep things quiet, but now, I have a better idea," Qin Shou said, his gaze sweeping over the group. "If we could have real people to replace them, the effect would definitely be better than paper figures."

"You want us to impersonate ghost messengers?" Jang Geun-suk immediately became restless: "That's too dangerous! What if the ghosts see through us...?"

"Oh, you're mistaken." Qin Shou waved his hand and casually pointed to the paper figure by the wall, saying, "My skills are extraordinary. Once I paint the white face of the underworld messenger on his face, even the King of Hell wouldn't recognize him. You can see for yourselves if you don't believe me."

All eyes were on the paper figures. There were two paper figures, one black and one white. The white paper figure held a token in its left hand and a lantern in its right hand, while the black paper figure held a token in its right hand and a lantern in its left hand.

The white paper figure is tall and thin, while the black paper figure is short and fat. Both paper figures wear tall hats on their heads, one with the words "May you make money at first sight" written on it, and the other with the words "Peace throughout the world" written on it. Below their two bloodless, dead faces, two long tongues hang down.

At first glance, it really looks like two ghosts standing by the wall, coming to claim someone's life.

"This craftsmanship is truly fascinating; the paintings are incredibly lifelike!" Zhang Genjian beamed. "Even I was almost fooled. This might actually work out!"

After some discussion, the group decided on the person to impersonate the underworld officials.

The Jang brothers, Jang Geun-suk and Jang Geun-geon, are both tall and strong, making them suitable replacements for the tall and thin Bai Wuchang (a character from Journey to the West).

Miao Miaomiao and Ding Wei are relatively short, so stuffing more straw scraps into their stomachs would make them suitable for playing the short and chubby Black Impermanence.

In fact, Feng Yushu was not tall, less than 1.7 meters, but she only wanted to stay by Ning Zhe's side and did not want Qin Shou to do her makeup. Therefore, she refused to take the place of the underworld messenger and went with Ning Zhe and Xu Beichen to prepare offerings for the villagers.

"They said they were going to prepare offerings, but there's nothing in this village. Where are we going to find things to offer?" Feng Yushu asked softly, holding Ning Zhe's arm.

“There’s a mill on the east side of the village. Qin Shou said there are still a few bags of beans inside,” Xu Beicheng said as they walked. “There’s still some time before dark. If we hurry, we should be able to make tofu from those beans before sunset.”

"Why tofu?" Feng Yushu asked, somewhat puzzled.

Ning Zhe replied without hesitation, "Because tofu becomes lighter after being pressed into shape, the ancients didn't know that this was due to filtering the bean dregs, so they said that the missing part was eaten by ghosts."

"Therefore, tofu has been regarded as ghost food since ancient times, and it is the most traditional offering for worshipping lonely ghosts. We can't go wrong by getting some tofu to offer to the dead."

"Oh, I see..." Feng Yushu nodded in sudden realization, her eyes sparkling as she looked at Ning Zhe.

The three of them soon arrived at the mill on the east side of the village and found several stone mills and the bags of soybeans that Qin Shou had mentioned. Unfortunately, there were no donkeys or mules in this lifeless and eerie village, so they had to grind the millstones themselves.

The group worked together, dividing tasks such as grinding, filtering, extracting, boiling, and adding gypsum, racing against time in every step.

Feng Yushu was pampered since childhood and had never done any heavy work, but she took off her coat, rolled up her sleeves, and did the work of a peasant woman without complaint, with glistening sweat dripping down her face.

Ning Zhe pulled a pack of tissues from his pocket and handed it to her: "Wipe your sweat off, and rest if you're tired."

Taking the tissue, Feng Yushu gently wiped the sweat from her face, then used the same tissue to wipe Ning Zhe's face, her dignified oval face beaming with a smile.

(End of this chapter)