Damn it, I'm in the garbage book I wrote

Chapter 905 Satisfaction and Debate

The next day, after they returned one after another, the entire city of Chang'an was safer than ever before. All those playboys who caused trouble and flaunted their wealth all hid at home, refusing to go out no matter what they were told, and using all sorts of outrageous excuses.

For several days in a row, it was the same. Those people had had enough of Tuoba Shang's misery. He would show his face and then disappear in an instant. Once he caught them, they would be in deep trouble.

Li Zhi laughed heartily in the Eastern Palace. After all, no one could have imagined that the chronic disease in Chang'an would be so thoroughly dealt with by his second brother in just a few days.

"As the saying goes, every bad guy has a bad guy to deal with him." Xiao Wu also laughed from the side: "When it comes to the most纨绔 (playboys) in the world, Second Brother is indeed one of the best."

“I think the number two is definitely his father, and the number one in the world is undoubtedly his father.” Zhang Jianzhi also looked up and chimed in, “But I never expected that my second brother would deal with them so easily.”

"By the way," Li Zhi turned his head and asked the eunuch beside him, "Where is my second brother? I didn't see him come today. He usually comes to kick the door before dawn."

The eunuch hurriedly replied, "Your Highness, His Highness Tuoba was invited to the Cui family's residence early this morning."

"The Cui family? What do they want with my second brother?"

"It's the young master of the Cui family, Cui Yan invited him."

Li Zhi frowned. He disliked Cui Yan intensely; that effeminate man was unbearable to look at, and his speech was affected and pretentious, not at all like a man. Moreover, he seemed to have some kind of problem… He had heard that he wasn't interested in women but always clung to handsome men. Every time Li Zhi thought about the way that guy looked at him, he felt nauseous.

"Oh no, could he have taken a liking to my second brother?! That damned fiend!" Li Zhi surprisingly swore. "I have to go save my second brother."

"Your Highness, please wait a moment." Zhang Jianzhi raised his head with a playful smile: "When Cui Yan stands up straight, he only reaches Second Brother's chest. If he really takes a fancy to Second Brother, Second Brother can slap him all the way to Kunlun Mountain. Besides, it's not like we haven't bathed with Second Brother before. That size is probably beyond Cui Yan's tolerance."

"Zhang! Jian! Zhi!" Xiao Wu, who had been holding back his anger, turned around and scolded, "If you keep saying these nonsense, don't blame me for reporting you."

Upon hearing that Xiao Wu was going to complain, Zhang Jianzhi immediately became obedient, lowering his head and muttering something to himself.

However, Li Zhi was still worried about his simple-minded second brother, fearing that he might be bewitched by that sorcerer. So after finishing his official duties, he hurriedly set off for the Cui family.

Before he could even enter the room, he saw his second brother picking his teeth and walking towards him, followed by a woman with a face as beautiful as a peach blossom, whose gender was difficult to discern.

However, this is not Cui Yan; judging from his attire, he looks more like an entertainer.

"Ah Zhi!" The second brother greeted Li Zhi immediately upon seeing him: "Have you eaten yet? If not, your second brother will treat you to roast pork."

"I've already eaten." Li Zhi stepped forward, looking the actor behind him up and down, and asked, "Second Brother, what's this?"

"This was a gift from Cui Yan." The second brother glanced back and said, "He was a courtesan, what was his name again?"

The woman next to her quickly stepped forward, her voice sweet and charming, and said, "This servant is Chengxin, greetings Your Highness."

Li Zhi frowned, ignoring the man, and instead questioned his second brother: "Second brother, how could you take in such a wicked person? If Father finds out, he'll beat you to death!"

“Hey, when will your brother ever like this kind of thing? This is for my uncle.”

"Are you out of your mind?" Li Zhi grabbed Tuoba Shang. "Second brother, are you crazy?!"

"You'll come with me."

Li Zhi had no choice but to follow this scoundrel to Xia Lin's residence, half-dragging and half-pulling him along.

Xia Lin was currently poking at the wormholes in the tree with a thin bamboo stick in the yard, then hooking out the longhorn beetle larvae. The bamboo tube beside him already contained more than half of the wriggling, plump, white worms.

"What's going on?" Tuoba Shang leaned forward to take a look.

"We'll fry them and eat them later." Xia Lin picked out a piece: "Look, isn't it fatty?"

"This smells delicious, I want to eat some too."

Xia Lin handed him a handful of bamboo skewers: "Go and hook them yourself. After we're done here, we'll go to the Imperial Garden. There are lots of big trees there, and it's almost the season for insects. They're at their fattest right now."

Then the two of them really focused on catching the insects, leaving Li Zhi and Chengxin outside. Li Zhi sat while Chengxin stood, and Chengxin would occasionally throw a flirtatious glance at Li Zhi, which made people's scalps tingle.

The two of them sat there staring at each other. The more Li Zhi looked at this wicked man, the more he disliked him. He wished he could just have him dragged out and beaten to death right now, but the problem was that he didn't dare... After all, his father was easy to talk to in other aspects, but he was extremely strict about the abuse of the law. He had said since he was a child that the current laws were bought with Anzi's life, and anyone who dared to act recklessly would be sent to keep Anzi company.

Even Li Zhi... not to mention Li Zhi, all families, kings and generals in the world are like this. An Zi used his life to erect a monument for them, and anyone who crossed the monument would be beheaded.

Just then, an announcement rang out from outside: "The Crown Prince of Shu, Li Chengqian, has arrived!"

Upon hearing this, Li Zhi immediately stood up. A short while later, Li Chengqian, dressed in a blue princely robe, walked in, looking travel-worn. His eyes lit up as soon as he saw Li Zhi: "Zhi'er!"

"Brother!" Li Zhi greeted him, clearly very excited: "Why are you back? Weren't you in Shu?"

"My aunt called me back, saying that the second brother was about to turn Chang'an upside down, so I set off from Jianmen overnight to come back. Where is Master?"

Li Zhi shook his head: "My second brother went to find Father, but he has been gone without a trace ever since."

"Then I'll wait for him here."

As he spoke, another person walked in through the door. He was dressed in a blue monk's robe, with beautiful features, a handsome appearance, clear eyes, and a composed demeanor. Although he was not old, about the same age as Li Zhi, he was very pleasing to the eye.

"This is?"

"Oh, this is a great disciple of the monk Xuanzang. We met in Sichuan. He happened to say he wanted to come to Chang'an, so we traveled together."

At this moment, the young monk stepped forward, clasped his hands and bowed: "This humble monk, Bianji, greets Your Highness the Crown Prince." At this moment, Li Chengqian also saw Chengxin beside him. He felt that this person was handsome and delicate, with fair skin, elegant posture, and charming and graceful, but it was somewhat difficult to tell whether he was male or female.

"Little brother, what's this?"

When Li Zhi saw Li Chengqian asking, he snorted and said, "That sorcerer from the Cui family gave it to my second brother today. I don't know what he's going to do with it."

Li Chengqian couldn't help but take a closer look at the items. Chengxin quickly stepped forward and said sweetly, "This servant greets Your Highness."

This behavior made Li Chengqian frown, and he couldn't help but feel a little disgusted, but he still said with doubt, "Brother, it's strange. I get goosebumps when I see this person, as if I've seen him before. It's really strange."

"Right? He's a monster."

The two brothers hadn't seen each other for a long time, so they naturally had a lot to talk about. In addition, the monk Bianji had also seen many interesting things during his travels around the world. So the three of them sat there chatting and drinking tea, and didn't feel that time was passing by.

But who knows what got into those two? They didn't come back from the woods until nightfall, each of them having caught about seven or eight pounds of these worms. They chatted happily as they walked, saying that they would fry them and sprinkle them with salt and pepper, and that each bite would burst with juice, and they didn't know how delicious it would be.

Halfway through their conversation, Xia Lin suddenly looked up and asked, "What did you want to see me about?"

At this moment, Tuoba Shangcai slapped his thigh: "Oh no, I forgot about your son!"

Xia Lin and Tuoba Shang each carried several bamboo tubes filled with plump longhorn beetle larvae into the courtyard, looking just like two mischievous children.

"Zhi'er, look, we're adding a dish tonight!" Xia Lin proudly lifted the bamboo tube and shook it. The worms inside wriggled, making Li Zhi's stomach churn.

Before he finished speaking, his gaze swept over Li Chengqian, who was standing next to Li Zhi, and his smile widened: "Oh, Chengqian is back too? Perfect, perfect, you'll get a share of the fried insects later!"

"Master."

Li Chengqian smiled and stepped forward to greet him. He was already used to Xia Lin's various strange and unusual foods. Back when Li Zhi wasn't around yet, his master and his long-lost pirate king father had eaten all sorts of strange things in Fuliang.

Xia Lin casually handed the bamboo tube to the servant beside him and instructed, "Take it to the kitchen, soak it in lightly salted water for half an hour, drain the water, and I will cook it myself later."

At this moment, his gaze finally passed over Li Chengqian and landed on the young monk in the blue robe behind him. With just one glance, the smile on Xia Lin's face froze instantly, as if someone had pressed the pause button. His eyes narrowed slightly as he carefully examined Bianji from head to toe, his gaze so sharp that it seemed to pierce through the monk's robe and reach the depths of his soul.

Bianji felt somewhat uncomfortable under that penetrating gaze, but he still maintained the posture of pressing his palms together in a salute, his clear eyes calmly returning the look.

The courtyard fell silent for a moment. Even Tuoba Shang noticed the subtle change in the atmosphere and looked curiously at Xia Lin, then at the incredibly handsome little monk.

Upon seeing this, Li Chengqian quickly introduced, "Master, this is Master Bianji, a highly accomplished disciple of Master Xuanzang. Bianji, this is Commander Xia."

Bianji bowed again: "This humble monk is Bianji, and I have long admired General Xia's name."

Xia Lin did not respond immediately. He stroked his chin, making an ambiguous "tsk tsk" sound, and slowly paced half a circle around Bianji. His eyes were like those of someone studying a rare treasure in a museum, with a playful look that was unique to time travelers who understood the course of history.

“Bianji… what a name, truly a good name.” Xia Lin finally stopped, his tone carrying an indescribable strangeness: “Master Xuanzang’s prized student. I’m an old friend of your master. You’re clearly a promising talent. Hmm, not bad, really not bad.”

His repeated "not bad" made Li Zhi and Li Chengqian exchange puzzled glances, feeling that there was something more to his words, something that was hard to explain.

Just then, Xia Lin caught a glimpse of Cheng Xin, who had been ignored, out of the corner of his eye. His gaze immediately turned to her, and when he saw Cheng Xin's handsome, delicate, charming yet timid appearance, Xia Lin's eyebrows almost reached his hairline.

"Wait!" He pointed at Chengxin, then suddenly turned to look at Li Chengqian, his eyes scanning back and forth between Chengxin and his eldest disciple, his expression becoming extremely interesting.

"Who...who is this?" Xia Lin's voice rose eight octaves.

Tuoba Shang eagerly answered, grinning, "Uncle, this is a performer named Chengxin, given to me by that effeminate man from the Cui family. I thought he looked delicate and fair-skinned, so I brought him to show you. Maybe you'll like him?"

"Chengxin?!" Xia Lin blurted out, his voice filled with disbelief. He slapped his forehead hard, making a crisp sound, as if he had heard the most outrageous joke of the year: "Bianji... Chengxin... Good heavens! You two... You two planned to come as a group today, right? What kind of dream collaboration is this?!"

His inexplicable words left everyone present bewildered. No one here understood what "dream collaboration" meant; they only felt that Xia Lin's reaction was too intense and strange.

Bianji maintained his polite smile, though a hint of confusion flickered in his eyes. Chengxin, on the other hand, turned pale with fright at Xia Lin's all-seeing gaze, trembling and shrinking back, looking even more pitiful.

Looking at the monk and the layman before him, one handsome and refined, the other gentle and graceful, one a high-risk figure who would cause a major upheaval in Buddhism and have an affair with a princess, the other a male concubine who might stir up trouble in the Eastern Palace, Xia Lin felt that this world was truly too absurd.

He took a deep breath, forcibly suppressing the urge to complain surging within him, and walked between Li Chengqian and Chengxin. His gaze finally landed on Li Chengqian, and his tone became unusually serious, even carrying a hint of warning:
“Chengqian, I watched you grow up. You are steady and gentle, and I trust you completely. But there are some things I must say beforehand…” He paused, glancing meaningfully at Chengxin, “Some people and some things, once you get involved, are trouble you can’t shake off. They can be deadly, even a deadly poison that shakes the foundation of the nation! Beauty is nothing but skin and bones, especially some inappropriate and unacceptable hobbies, which are the path to disaster! You will be a regional prince in the future, so you must have a scale in your heart, knowing what you should touch and what is not even worth a glance! Do you understand?”

Although Li Chengqian didn't quite understand why his master was suddenly giving him such a serious reprimand, he always respected Xia Lin, so he immediately bowed and said solemnly, "Chengqian will remember Master's teachings and will never dare to do anything wrong."

Xia Lin finally breathed a sigh of relief. Thinking of the two buckets of fat worms, it seemed only these pure ingredients could soothe the turmoil in his heart caused by historical inertia. So he waved his hand, as if to drive away something unclean: "Alright, alright, stop standing around. The worms won't be fresh if they soak any longer. I'm going to the kitchen to stir-fry them. Master Bianji, right? Hmm... very good, young and promising. Take care of yourself."

"Is my father a little... strange?" Li Zhi turned his head and asked curiously.

"Yes, it is a bit strange." Tuoba Shang scratched his head. "Could it be that we encountered something unclean in the forest?"

Li Chengqian, being the eldest brother, was more composed. He turned to look at Bianji and Chengxin behind him and lowered his voice, saying, "Do you think Master is doing this because of those two behind him?"

"Damn it!" Tuoba Shang slapped his thigh again, making a loud cracking sound. "Uncle, you don't think I've fallen for men again, do you!?"

"No," Li Chengqian said seriously, "Master seems to think I'm attracted to men..."

"Oh..." Li Zhi suddenly realized, pointing at Tuoba Shang and saying, "It's over, Second Brother, you've ruined Eldest Brother. Now my father is definitely thinking of a way to exorcise him. He might even force-feed Eldest Brother the Golden Juice later. He's probably already boiling shit!"

Upon hearing the words "pouring golden juice," Li Chengqian's expression changed drastically: "No way... It's better to die than to make me drink that! I'll go and explain this to my master right now!"

(End of this chapter)