I was forced to cultivate immortality when I just wanted to lie down

Chapter 14: Visiting a Funeral Home

In the coroner's shop, Xu Qing used blood as a medium, and like a child twisting a rope, he twisted the blood threads from his ten fingertips, turning them over continuously, and finally weaved them into a winged bloodworm that looked like a green louse.

On the abdomen of the cicada-shaped bloodworm, which looks like a hollow paper-cut, you can vaguely see dozens of green louse larvae the size of rice grains.

The mother and son tied a rope, and the green dragon curse began.

Xu Qing, who was well prepared, put the mother rope on his golden clapper, and the baby insects flapped their wings and fell into his purse.

At the mouth of the purse, a flash of light with green in red passed by. If Xu Qing had not been staring at it, he would have thought it was dazzled.

"Is this it?"

Xu Qing took out a copper coin, went to the backyard with the mentality of giving it a try, and then gathered all his strength and threw it out of the wall.

He was not afraid of hitting anyone. Even if a copper coin fell on his head, it would be like raindrops, and at most it would make a small bump. He would go home and ask his wife to blow it, and after that, the bump would be gone.

After throwing the copper coin, Xu Qing stood in the backyard and looked up at the sky, but after waiting for half a cup of tea, he still didn't see the copper coin flying back with its little wings.

Could it be that I used too much force and the mother coin couldn't receive the signal?

Xu Qing estimated the force and threw out another coin. This time he used half the force and waited for a while, but there was still no trace of the coin.

I hope this money-returning trick doesn't work, does it?

Xu Qing looked at the remaining money in his purse, thought about it and decided to forget it!

Fortunately, he only threw away two copper coins. If he had thrown away the silver in his purse, he would have lost a lot of money.

He is relying on this money to collect the body!
Back at the front bunk, the prostitute's naked body was still lying on the broken plank bed. Xu Qing thought it was not a good idea to leave it exposed like that, as it was quite immoral.

If you were to follow the ways of the corpse driver, you should find a compartment and seal up the corpses now. When you have collected enough bodies, you can sell them all together or rush them to the charity cemetery.

There was a compartment in the coroner's shop. In the past, Liu Youdao would not only keep the bodies in it, but he himself would also rest in the compartment.

You have such a big heart to gather a bunch of corpses and stand them at the head of the bed as a backdrop!

Xu Qing doesn't have that hobby, he has no interest in corpses.

After much thought, Xu Qing felt that he had to buy a few coffins and use them as containers to temporarily put the body in. When there was no room left, he would choose an auspicious day and find a piece of land to bury the body.

No matter whether the corpses were good or not when they were alive, in the end it is important that they are buried in peace.

If you just throw it into the wilderness or sink it into the river, and wait for the corpse to start smelling bad and attract the god of plague to the world, that would be truly immoral!

The Jingxia Street where Xu Qing lived was privately nicknamed Sangmen Street.

This is because this street is full of funeral-related shops.

Places like coffin shops, paper-making shops, and incense and candle shops are all here.

Just recently, a new coroner's shop was opened, which specializes in funeral burials and other services for the dead.

At this time, the owner of the paper-making shop, Wu Yaoxing, was leaning against the door with nothing to do. Beside him, besides a paper horse with half of its head exposed, there were two wreaths placed on the left and right. The main emphasis was on symmetry.

Wu Yaoxing was cracking melon seeds and looking at the people walking in groups of two or three on the street. He was too embarrassed to raise his voice and shout to attract customers like other shops.

After all, a slow business is a small matter, but a broken leg is a big deal!
Ever since Wu Yaoxing started his paper-making business, he'd had fewer relatives visiting him. During festivals, only the shop owners on this street would greet each other. When they had nothing else to do, they'd occasionally get together to chat.

Wu Yaoxing was cracking melon seeds when he saw the young owner of the newly opened shop next door show up.

Wu Yaoxing was worried that no one would entertain him, and this really upset him!

He put the melon seed shells in his pocket, freed his hands and started to greet people, looking just like a pimp at the door of a brothel.

"Young man, come over and sit down. You're free anyway, so let's chat."

Xu Qing, who was about to go out, thought for a moment and felt that the relationship between neighbors really needed to be improved, so he went to the door of the paper-making shop.

Wu Yaoxing hurriedly brought a small stool, took out a handful of melon seeds and was about to stuff them into Xu Qing's hands.

How could Xu Qing be used to eating this? Not to mention the spiced ones, even the sweet ones are not in the zombie menu!
He had no choice but to say politely, "Old Wu, I've been irritable lately and can't eat this."

Then, Xu Qing took out a handful of small persimmons from the bag he was carrying and said, "I have some snacks here too. I heard they are sunset red persimmons from Gannan. Not only are they sweet, but the dried persimmon frost can also reduce internal heat and dryness. You should try some."

"That's great, I'd love to try it!"

Sometimes, getting along with others is just that simple. Once two people start chatting, their relationship becomes much closer without them realizing it.

While eating the sweet persimmon cakes, the two began to chat.

It was mainly Wu Yaoxing who was talking and Xu Qing who was listening.

The topics are nothing more than popular gossip, interspersed with occasional family matters, such as how old are you this year? Are you married? Where is your hometown?
As Wu Yaoxing was speaking, he brought up a celebrity anecdote that had recently gone viral!
And this celebrity happened to be an acquaintance whom Xu Qing had just met a few days ago and had performed a ritual for the other party - the wealthy man in Tongzi Street, Mr. Liu!

"It's true that every family has its own problems. Mr. Liu is such a wealthy man. A few years ago, he even set up tents to give out porridge and helped the disaster victims from Yaozhou. Who would have thought that his wife and the housekeeper would deceive him for so long? Not only did they have an adultery and give birth to a child, but they also live in his mansion, spend his money, and raise their own children."

"I've never seen anyone get scammed so badly!"

Xu Qing listened to this and said nonchalantly, "That's impossible. I just presided over Mr. Liu's funeral a few days ago. I haven't heard of this. Who did you hear this from?"

"That's what Old Man Hu, the coffin guy on the street, said. He's childless and spends all day flirting with old ladies. I guess he wants a companion when he dies. You didn't see the coffin Old Man Hu bought for himself. It's so wide, there's room for two or three people!"

"That's not it. I mean, how did the affair between Mrs. Liu and the housekeeper get discovered?"

"Well, I heard that it was Mr. Liu's concubine who went to the police station to file a complaint. I don't know the details, but when the police arrived at the Liu family's house, they pulled down the pants of the housekeeper and Mr. Liu's son in front of everyone. Guess what happened?"

I'm just a kid, and you still make me guess!

Xu Qing smiled and said, "I guess they have two identical moles on their buttocks, and the moles are a pair of peach blossoms!"

"."

Wu Yaoxing, who was speaking excitedly, felt like a rooster about to crow but had its neck strangled. He felt so uncomfortable!

"You little rascal, you know this and still come to ask me?"

Seeing Wu Yaoxing puffing out his beard and glaring, Xu Qing quickly said, "How could that be? Although I've heard others talk about it, they didn't talk as well as you did. What you said sounded like I was in a teahouse, so comfortable!" Wu Yaoxing's expression eased a little, and the two of them chatted back and forth. By the time they got to know each other better, Xu Qing had figured out the whole story.

As the saying goes, good news doesn't travel far, but bad news travels a thousand miles.

Ever since Su Hongxiu, the concubine of the Liu family, brought a complaint to the government, the police officers from the yamen came to the Liu family like bandits entering a village. Without saying a word, they stripped the pants of the housekeeper Song Cai and Mr. Liu.

After confirming that the two had the same birthmark, Captain Zhao Zhonghe immediately pulled out a Guanzhong sword that was about three feet long and as wide as a palm, and was about to cut open the two's fingers to test their relationship by dropping blood.

The young master of the Liu family thought he was going to be executed on the spot, and he was so scared that he kept shouting, "Dad! My dear dad!"

Zhao Zhonghe had a naturally raspy voice, and he roared, "Who's your real father?! Straighten your tongue and speak!"

The young master of the Liu family trembled and stretched out a finger, pointing at Song Cai: "He, he is my biological father!"

Butler Song Cai sighed deeply and collapsed on the ground.

Zhao Zhonghe didn't care about all this. He arrested the two men and was about to take them to the detention room to await trial. When they were about to leave Liu's house, the wife of the Liu family's helmsman came out with silver bills to block their way. When she asked about their identities, she asked, "Mother of Young Master Liu?"
Take it together!

After an all-night interrogation, a scandalous murder case that shocked the streets of Linhefang also surfaced.

It is said that since ancient times, adultery has resulted in many deaths, and only by loving yourself can you find peace.

At this point, the case of Mr. Liu's murder in Tangchi was completely solved.

"What's the situation at the Liu Mansion now?" Xu Qing was a little curious. If all the people in charge of the Liu family had gone in, wouldn't Su Hongxiu be the only one left as the biggest winner?
"You mean the Liu Mansion? It was sealed off by the government a long time ago. I guess it will eventually fall into the hands of the government."

"Sealted? The concubine of the Liu family who reported the matter should have inherited some of the family property, right?" Xu Qing really didn't expect this time. Could it be that Su Hongxiu was just the mantis wielding the knife, and the government office was the oriole that finally pecked at the food?

Wu Yaoxing took the persimmon cake that was handed to him again and talked about a new version that Xu Qing didn't know.

After about a cup of tea, Xu Qing understood why Su Hongxiu failed to become the winner.

It turned out that when Su Hongxiu was about to take over the Liu family's business, the old man in charge of the accounting office in the Liu Mansion, Song Cai's uncle, also submitted a complaint.

The complaint stated that Su Hongxiu had had secret meetings with outsiders more than once during her stay at Liu's residence. What's worse, she even climbed over the wall to get in and had intimate relations with the outsiders. She was also suspected of committing adultery!

Originally, relatives cannot be used as evidence, and Song Cai's uncle's testimony cannot be used as evidence in court. But the government office itself is a money-eating beast. The Liu family has such a huge fortune that even the official would be jealous!
After several rounds of tug-of-war, although Su Hongxiu was not convicted, the Liu Mansion was sealed off, so she had no choice but to wander around the red-light district with her maid and start her old business again.

After all, they don't have the experience to do other jobs, and after thinking about it, they still feel more comfortable doing their old job.

After chatting, Xu Qingwan declined Wu Yaoxing's invitation to dinner. He was afraid that the way he gnawed on the candles would scare the other party.

After leaving the paper-making shop and walking a short distance, you will reach the coffin shop on the street.

Looking at the three big characters "An Le Shou" written in red on a black background on the door plaque, Xu Qing subconsciously patted his cheek.

For some reason, whenever he passed by the door of the coffin shop, he would feel drowsy, and always felt that the coffins inside were more comfortable than the soft big bed.

As I walked into the shop, I saw two black coffins.

There is a couplet on the left side of the coffin, which reads "No one can live a thousand years";
There is also a couplet pasted on the right side of the coffin foot, which reads "There is eternal life where I am".

Let’s look at the horizontal batch again.
Xu Qing looked up and saw a red coffin hanging from the beam above his head. On the bottom of the coffin was written: "Life has no second price."

Shou means "sell" and also means "coffin".

It means it’s a one-time deal, no matter the price!
When Xu Qing was watching with great interest, a skinny old man in funeral clothes walked out from the inner room with his hands behind his back.

"Young man, are you here to ask for a coffin, or to place an order?"

Xu Qing pondered for a moment and said, "Let's get two coffins. They don't have to be very good, but preferably ones with a large space, warm in winter and cool in summer, and good ventilation."

"."

Hu Baosong raised his eyebrows and interrupted, "You are indeed a filial young man, but this is not the way to choose a coffin."

While the two were talking, Hu Baosong came to a coffin near the shop door and reached out to touch the coffin lid. When he was about to explain the ins and outs to Xu Qing, he suddenly caught a glimpse of something rolling in from the shop door.

"Where did the copper coins come from?" The old man rubbed his blurry eyes to make sure if he had seen it wrong.

Xu Qing turned around when he heard the sound and saw a copper coin rolling upright towards the door of the coffin shop from the alley across the street!

Not to mention, this copper coin looks familiar. Isn't it the Qingchuangzi coin he lost earlier?

After the seed coin was discarded, it wandered around the streets and alleys for a long time before finally finding the place where the mother coin was. At this time, it rolled in front of Xu Qing like a tadpole looking for its mother, turned around twice with a jingling sound, and finally landed on the ground in front of his feet.

When Hu Baosong saw Xu Qing pick up the copper coin, he frowned slightly at first, and then his expression changed drastically.

"Hurry, throw this money away! This money came here on its own, I'm afraid it's not clean, maybe it's just a ghost throwing it away as a way to save his life!"

Just as Hu Baosong finished speaking, he saw another copper coin rolling over from the alley across the street, and this time it happened to stop in the same position as its brother.

"Fuck you! Don't you even know what kind of place this is? Your ancestors have been eating and shitting ghosts since they were little, and there are forty-two ghost thighs stewing on the stove at home! You want to ask for directions, to save your life, and you don't even consider whether you have enough weight!"

Hu Baosong was really brave enough to take action when something happened. Seeing that the money came from nowhere, he suddenly reached out to pick up the copper coin on the ground, and then snatched the copper coin from Xu Qing's hand, and threw it out with all his strength, cursing and saying crazy words at the same time!

"Don't be afraid, young man! People in our profession have seen everything. Those wandering ghosts are most afraid of foul language. As long as we curse harshly, they won't dare to come and harm people!"

"."

Xu Qing looked at the copper coins that were thrown out again after he came back, and was speechless for a long time.

They should be able to find their way back later, right?

Thinking of this, Xu Qing didn't dare to stay any longer. He was afraid that the two copper coins would come back as a surprise. Wouldn't that make Uncle Hu unable to sleep for several days and nights?

You can’t do such immoral things!

After chatting with Hu Baosong for a while and confirming the delivery date, Xu Qing hurriedly left the coffin shop.

Although I didn't see Old Man Hu's big coffin that could hold two or three people during my trip to the coffin shop today, I did order two new coffins to stock up on supplies, which further verified the effectiveness of the Qing Qu Gui Qian Curse.

It can be said that the trip was worthwhile!
(End of this chapter)