I was forced to cultivate immortality when I just wanted to lie down

Chapter 159 Anecdotes from the Inn: The Rat King's Marriage Proposal

"Big rat, big rat, don't eat my millet! I've served you for three years, yet you don't care about me at all!"

The so-called exorcism ritual requires a specific method. This method doesn't mean that you can eliminate the demon with a few punches and kicks and then everything will be fine.

Since I've been invited to exorcise demons, I have to act like a sorcerer. Sometimes incantations may not be effective, but reciting them makes me sound more professional.

Xu Qing recited an anonymous poem while drawing circles in his hand with the elm wood sword made from lightning-struck wood.

This action startled Guo Dongyang and the supervisor in charge of the construction, leaving them completely bewildered.

I have to say, it actually looks pretty convincing!

After circling the grain storage warehouse and muttering to himself, Xu Qing's brows furrowed even more deeply.

The Yin Eyes appeared, and in the center of the granary, which was laid out with mountains and stops, only a trace of demonic energy permeated the ground. If Xu Qing had not possessed the Heavenly Eye Yin Eyes, he probably wouldn't have been able to see even a single mouse hair.

The largest granary is located in the center of the granary. The demon rats hide in the deepest part of the granary, just like turtles that have their heads tucked in. No matter how many times you circle around them, you can't find a way to get to them.

The granary official followed Xu Qing and ran laps around the granary. After one lap, the granary official, who had been sitting at his desk for a long time, was covered in sweat.

I sent you here to vanquish demons and monsters, not to lead imperial officials on a military exercise!

Suppressing his anger, the granary official wiped his sweat with a handkerchief and questioned, "Master Xu, you've seen it all, when do you plan to get rid of the rat infestation?"

Xu Qing ignored the granary official and turned to look at Xuan Yu and Guan Dazhuang.

Xuan Yu turned her head away, as if she felt ashamed to face Xu Qing.

Guan Dazhuang shook his head: "The demon rat is hiding in the cave. If we guard the entrance and wait for three to five days, we might be able to catch it."

"But with so much grain here, let alone three or five days, even if it holds out for three or five years, who can do anything to it?"

Upon hearing this, the official was displeased and said, "Since you have no ability to subdue demons, then don't waste my time."

Xu Qing raised his hand to interrupt the granary official's harsh words and said, "It's all up to people. This matter is just difficult to handle, but it's not impossible."

"Don't try to fool me. Since you have a method, then act on it quickly!"

Suppressing the urge to hold a funeral for the grain official in front of him, Xu Qing picked up a clump of soil from the ground, raised an eyebrow, and said, "The layout of this granary is quite sophisticated."

Guo Dongyang's heart skipped a beat, and he quickly asked, "What's the explanation?"

Xu Qing pondered and said, "This granary is laid out with mountains and stops in mind. In feng shui, the mountains and stops generate wealth, and the grain is piled up like mountains."

"This granary occupies a strategically important northeastern position, a place considered a repository of wealth. Having a granary here helps to retain the essence of the grains. We entered through the south gate; as the saying goes, 'When the south gate opens, the five grains will flourish.'"

When it comes to feng shui, Xu Qing has never seen any funeral master who can surpass him. Once you master one method, you'll master all methods. If you reach the pinnacle of feng shui in geomancy, you'll naturally become proficient in other aspects of feng shui.

"This granary is near water but not directly on it, which can prevent fire. There is a water-suppressing stone three steps away from the granary. It must have been guided by a wise person when the granary was built. This gray stone tablet can block the moisture."

The granary official's expression softened slightly: "You have some insight. This granary was originally built by a master from the Celestial Master's Mansion at the request of the Imperial Observatory, so it is naturally extraordinary."

"I haven't finished speaking yet," Xu Qing said with a half-smile. "The granary should ideally be rectangular or square, corresponding to the virtue of the earth in the concept of a round heaven and a square earth. Sharp corners and curved shapes, which disrupt the flow of energy, should be avoided. As the old saying goes: 'If the granary is not properly shaped, rats and ants will invade the grain, and the family's fortunes will surely decline!'"

"But now this granary has a sharp corner. Look there, sir. Doesn't it look like the face of a rat?"

The granary official looked in the direction Xu Qing was pointing.

Good heavens! That place is none other than the newly built relief warehouse for disaster victims!
Pointing to the nine granary rooms, Xu Qing said, "If all the grain in that granary can be released, this 'sharp snout' layout can be broken. Without its snout, the rats can no longer steal grain, and your problem will be solved."

The official in charge of the granary waved his sleeves and put his hands behind his back, his face ashen, and said, "This is alarmist talk! What could the rat infestation have to do with the relief granary? You can exorcise the demon, but don't meddle in these other people's business."

Xu Qing looked at the overflowing granary filled with the aroma of grains, but could only sigh helplessly.

No wonder there are so many refugees in the world; it turns out there is so much food available.

Unfortunately, they preferred to feed the relief grain to rats rather than actually send out the grain that should have been given away.

After glancing at the sky and pondering for a moment, Xu Qing turned and began to walk out of the warehouse.

"Sir, let's go outside to talk."

When the group arrived outside the granary, which covered dozens of acres, Xu Qing finally spoke up: "This granary covers a vast area and stores more than a million shi of grain, but why is there not a single rat in the granary today?"

"No matter how cautious the rat demon is, some of the stupid little rats under him must eventually show themselves."

The official in charge of provisions hesitated and asked, "What does the Master mean?"

Xu Qing chuckled: "This rat demon must have spies and informants. When those spies heard that you were going to invite the Cat Immortal Hall to catch the rats, they ordered all the rats to hide."

Before Xu Qing could continue, the clerk suddenly realized and said, "I understand. The monk means to pretend to leave for now, and then return to subdue those rats who can't stand the light of day when they lower their guard and come out to move around."

These officials may be ruthless, but most of them are not stupid.

Xu Qing nodded: "Mice are also called 'Zi mice' because they are usually active at midnight. It's not too late to deal with them then."

“That makes sense,” the granary official nodded. “Then you gentlemen, please come with me to the inn to rest. We’ll come back to the granary later to deal with the rats.”

Twenty miles away, at the official post station.

Guo Dongyang diligently poured tea and offered seats; though nearing fifty, he acted like an old servant.

Xu Qing knew this man's nature; he couldn't resist anything new, and if someone had a good story to sell, he would spend a fortune, even if he had no money left, just to listen to someone tell stories of the past and present.

Unfortunately, Xu Qing is a bit of a character; telling stories is tiring, but listening to stories is much more fun!
If you pour me tea, I'll pour you tea too; if you offer me a seat, I'll let you sit down first.

The two of them kept deferring to each other, but Guo Dongyang ended up being praised and sung about by Xu Qing for an hour.

Guo Dongyang is a professional storyteller, and his storytelling style has a distinct teahouse feel to it.

The moment that unique storytelling style began, the quiet and elegant inn seemed to suddenly become lively.

Xuan Yu sat on the mat, listening attentively.

Guan Dazhuang rarely heard of worldly affairs, and for a moment he was completely absorbed.

Officials and errand boys passing by saw Guo Dongyang's eloquent speech and wondered when the post station had added storytelling to its services.

Upstairs at the post station, an official from Jiangnan was leaning on the railing, looking down.

"I had long heard that the people of Tianjin were very interesting in their storytelling and conversation, and now that I see it, it is indeed quite interesting."

A servant standing beside him, holding the horse's stirrups and in charge of all travel arrangements, said with a smile, "Speaking of which, young master is also from Tianjin. Master seems to have a connection with this place."

“Yes, that’s right. Tomorrow I’ll go and see his aunt. He lost his parents at a young age, and his aunt and uncle have always taken care of him. I’m just passing through, so it’s only right and proper that I pay them a visit.”

In the main hall of the pavilion, whenever Guo Dongyang was about to stop talking because his throat was dry, a cup of fresh tea would always be served at the right time.

Half an hour later, Guo Dongyang finally found a chance to go out and relieve himself.

When he returned, he looked at Xu Qing with great excitement.

Judging from the hesitant look on the other party's face, Xu Qing knew that the other party wanted him to repay the story.

“I’m not good at telling stories, but I’ve heard some tales from the countryside lately. If you’d like to hear them, Brother Guo, I’ll tell you.” “I’ll start with the first one. This happened decades ago. It’s said that there was a mountain temple about twenty miles outside of Laotaishan in Tianjin.”

Guan Dazhuang stood to the side with a strange expression, while Xuan Yu pricked up his ears, listening more attentively than anyone else.

A sorceress raises a tiger, two tigers turn against each other, and a passerby subdues the tiger and demons in a dilapidated temple on a rainy night.
Guo Dongyang listened with rapt attention, as if the event had truly occurred.

"People can be good or evil, and even tigers can be different. That Big Tiger was more loyal and righteous than some people. It's just a pity that the story is just a story, otherwise I would like to have a drink with him."

Nearby, a government official who was taking a break laughed and said, "You storyteller are quite bold. I'm afraid if a tiger were really sitting in front of you, you would be so scared that you would wet yourself."

Upon hearing this, most of the others couldn't help but chuckle, and the atmosphere in the inn instantly became cheerful.

Guan Dazhuang silently poured fresh tea for the group.

Finally, the man in yellow picked up a cup of tea from the table and placed it in front of the black cat sitting quietly to the side.

Xuanmao looked at the tea, then glanced at the laughing crowd in the inn, his expression inscrutable.

After telling the story of the demon tiger, Xu Qing pondered for a moment, then turned to tell an anecdote that happened outside Luoyang City. He said that there was a carpenter near the West Gate and Guangning Temple.
As evening approached, the granary official finally realized that it was getting late.

"Hey! You've been so busy telling stories and reminiscing that you've neglected important matters! We were supposed to have official business tonight, so why didn't you make some preparations beforehand? Instead, you've been sitting here idly for half the day."

The granary official was also quite annoyed, blaming it on the fact that there were so few things to amuse him in this situation, which was why he had become so engrossed in listening.

Xu Qing smiled slightly and said, "It's alright. In fact, telling stories is not necessarily easier than official duties."

"."

If it had been before, the granary official would have surely accused Xu Qing of arrogance upon hearing these words. But after hearing these bizarre tales, he inexplicably felt that the man's words came from the bottom of his heart, without a trace of falsehood.
Officials around them tried to persuade them to stay, saying it was getting late and they should stay for a late-night chat by candlelight, but Xu Qing and Guo Dongyang politely declined, citing official business.

Some officials persisted, asking what official business it was, but the clerk brushed them off with evasive answers.

This place is not far from the Tianjin granary. If these officials who love to watch the excitement were to find out that Xu Qing was going to exorcise a demon, they might be tempted to join in the fun.

Watching the demon-slaying ceremony is a minor matter; if others see the 'great altar' worth five thousand taels of silver, things will get really messy!

It was 11:45 PM, which was still some time before midnight.

Xu Qing and Guan Dazhuang disguised themselves as warehouse managers, while the officials in charge of grain storage followed behind them, not daring to utter a sound.

Inside the seven-foot-wide passageway, several enormous rats, no smaller than an official's hat, were carrying water into the warehouse.

The water was not stored in water jars or pots, nor did it slosh around in bowls or ladles; instead, it was wrapped in the cheek pouches or stomachs of large rats.

While cheek pouches are where mice store food, storing water is not so easy.

Water droplets trickled down the corners of the giant rat's mouth in the granary passage, and before long, the dry ground was covered with damp stains.

Xu Qing raised his hand and gestured behind him, stopping Guo Dongyang and the clerk who wanted to come over.

He then winked at Xuan Yu and Guan Dazhuang.

Guan Dazhuang understood immediately, turned into a barn, and disappeared.

Xuan Yu then made his way towards the warehouse passageway, which was just wide enough for a cart to pass through.

Inside the warehouse, the giant rat responsible for transporting water was preparing to head home when it unexpectedly saw a black cat entering the warehouse.

The black cats of Jiudaoqu are most resistant to rats. As soon as Xuan Yu stood there, several large rats in the warehouse lost their courage.

The lead rat, with its round little eyes, turned around and tried to escape.

But as soon as it turned around, it saw another huge cat in the storage passage behind it!
Although the rat had seen a lot of the world, it usually stayed in the marketplace and had never seen a fierce tiger with piercing eyes and a white forehead.

The mice were terrified, wondering what terrible law they had broken to attract such a large cat to come and take their lives!

The large cat completely blocked the passageway, its wide mouth, reeking of fish, slightly open, revealing gleaming fangs that seemed to grow fast even without being sharpened.

The rat trembled with fear, and the water stored in its cheek pouches poured out onto the ground like a flood. As it watched the tiger approaching, it felt itself getting closer and closer to its grandmother.

Turning around, one could see that the black cat, which had been standing motionless at the entrance of the warehouse, had taken advantage of the cat's momentary daze to touch its tail and was raising a paw as if to slap its head.

Mother!

The giant rat rolled its eyes, foamed at the mouth, and lay on the ground convulsing.

Several large rats nearby followed suit, lying down and pretending to be dead.

Xuan Yu's raised cat paw remained suspended in mid-air before it was lowered in disappointment.

I thought bigger mice would be more fun, but these mice, despite their size, were still as timid as mice.

Xuan Yu teased the giant rat's plump body with her paw, but the rat remained unmoved.

Feeling rather bored, Xuan Yu withdrew her paw and looked up at the large cat in front of her again.

The big cat with its piercing eyes and white forehead has a head that's several sizes bigger than its own!
Xuan Yu withdrew her gaze, turned around, and silently left the warehouse.

Xu Qing was smiling and talking to the granary official when he turned around and saw Xuan Yu sitting silently beside him, like a fine charcoal sculpture.

Guo Dongyang asked in confusion, "This cat."

Before he finished speaking, a burly man in yellow clothes walked over from the canal entrance carrying several large rats.

He held the tails of those large rats in his palm, as big as a fan, like a hunter carrying freshly hunted game.

"Wow! What a fat rat!"

Guo Dongyang exclaimed in surprise, and the official in charge of the granary also gasped in astonishment. In the past, he had only seen the shadows of rats from afar and had not found them astonishing. But now, seeing them up close, he realized that each rat must weigh at least twenty or thirty pounds!
Everyone says that rats are as big as cats, and now that the two of them have taken a look, they can't help but be amazed.

"This rat is bigger than this black cat!"

Xuan Yu glanced sideways at the granary official, his gaze deep and unsettling.

Xu Qing kicked the motionless rats, amused: "Are they scared out of their wits?"

"Dazhuang, these rats look pretty fat, they must taste good. If they don't wake up, skin them, tear them into strips, and they'll be our provisions on the way back."

"Squeaky-"

The lead rat flipped over like a ball, then pounded its head like a pestle, sometimes kowtowing to Xu Qing, sometimes turning to Guan Dazhuang and Xuan Yu. Judging from its appearance, it could betray its own rat king and its companions without Xu Qing even needing to interrogate it.

Xu Qing immediately asked a question, and several large rats chattered, pointing at the central granary one moment and then acting coyly like young girls walking the next.

That little face was as ridiculous as could be.

However, Xu Qing, who was fluent in the language of birds and beasts, only heard one thing.

From the 7th to the 17th of the eighth lunar month, it is the time for the daughter of the Rat King of Tianjin to hold her marriage proposal!

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(End of this chapter)