I was forced to cultivate immortality when I just wanted to lie down

Chapter 288 Encountering an Enemy at the Funeral Banquet

Xu Qing plucked a hair from the corpse and blew it out. The hair instantly decomposed into black smoke, which quickly gathered back into its original shape as it swirled and spread.

This is a low-grade Heaven-level dismemberment technique.

Its function is to gather a ball of pure primordial magical power in the mouth, take the body's hair, skin, blood, and flesh, and blow it out to condense a clone.

However, the cultivation and magical power of the dismembered body are far inferior to that of the original body. After testing, Xu Qing found that a dismembered body is roughly equivalent to a golden-armored corpse, and is even weaker than a normal golden-armored corpse.

This may be related to the concentration of his original magical power. If he were to exert his full strength, a dismembered body would probably be equivalent to a golden-armored corpse in its prime, and specifically, the version of the golden-armored corpse that Xu Qing possessed.

Xu Qing shattered the dismembered body with a single punch, and the original magical power then transformed into a wisp of black smoke, which he inhaled into his stomach.

This dismemberment technique is not only intimidating and ingenious, but it can also distract the enemy in critical moments, playing a crucial role in deciding the outcome of the battle.

Moreover, as long as the enemy does not refine or collect the dismembered body, even if the dismembered body is broken, it can still be transformed into the original magic power and return to the original body.

Xu Qing estimated that with his current amount of original magical power, he could probably blow out five or six dismembered bodies at a time for each type of zombie.

Among them, there were as many as nine waterborne corpses.

However, in return, his magical power will be completely drained.

That being said, if Xu Qing wanted to conjure a zombie-like clone, it would still be a piece of cake for him.

Xu Qing, whose mind and body were constantly changing and who was no longer behaving himself, plucked out a tuft of hair. When the dense corpse energy and magic power filled the room, nine water zombie clones appeared in the entire morgue. Without exception, they were all zombies at the Golden Armor Corpse level.

Living near the river for cultivation, he was indeed a bit more 'fickle'.

At the counter, Xuan Yu sensed something was wrong. It detached itself from Sun Erniang's corpse, transformed into a streak of black light, and arrived outside the morgue in the blink of an eye.

"Xu Xianjia?"

The cat asked.

With a creak, the door opened, and Xu Qing walked out.

Xuan Yu was about to ask something, but when it glanced at Xu Qing out of the corner of its eye, it found that the house where the corpses were kept was full of Xu Xian's family.

Maomao was shocked.

Just as Xu Qing was about to speak, he saw Xuan Yu turn her head, her eyes wide with confusion, and ask, "Isn't the Xu Immortal family human?"

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Xu Qing held his breath and concentrated.

So, it's finally been discovered? In that case...
However, before Xu Qing could make a move, Xuan Yu exclaimed in astonishment, "So, the Xu Immortal is also a Xuan Cat with nine lives!"

How did you arrive at this conclusion?

The words Xu Qing had just thought of stuck in his throat.

Xuan Yu's eyes lit up as she argued logically, "The Nine-Lives Mystic Cat possesses innate supernatural abilities, allowing it to create nine clones. The Xu Immortal also has nine clones."

Xu Qing interrupted in time, saying, "I'm not a cat! As far as I know, besides the Nine-Lives Cat, there is another kind of monkey that also has the ability to create clones."

"Is Xu Xian a monkey?" Xuan Yu was even more shocked.

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"I am a human being, not a monkey."

Zombies are transformed from the dead, and the dead are also people, so zombies are equivalent to people, which makes perfect sense.

"Do humans also have the ability to create clones?"

"No, but you can learn."

Xu Qing casually remarked, "Humans are most adept at visualization and learning. I formed a bond with the Xuan Yu Immortal and cultivated together under the same roof. I visualized Xuan Yu for a long time, and naturally, I achieved success in my cultivation and comprehended the art of creating clones."

"Really?" Xuan Yu was somewhat doubtful. Could human comprehension really be that amazing?
"Of course it's true. Humans are the most intelligent of all beings, born with wisdom. And I am one of the best among humans, so learning a clone technique is naturally a piece of cake."

"Then I'll let Master Xu see more of this in the future. Wouldn't that give Master Xu a chance to comprehend the Nine Lives Divine Power?"

Xuan Yu's eyes grew brighter and brighter.

Even though Xu Qing gave her a different answer, Xuan Yu was still very happy. It felt like a big cat that knew how to hunt had taught its pet the same hunting skills.

Xu Qing looked at Xuan Yu, whose gaze had suddenly softened and even carried a hint of affection, and felt that something was not quite right.

"Unfortunately, I only have eight lives now. Even if the Xu family wanted to visualize it, they wouldn't be able to visualize the real Nine-Lives Mystic Cat."

Xuan Yu, who had just been overjoyed, suddenly felt dejected.

It wasn't that it was saddened by losing its life, but rather by not meeting Xu Qing when it was at its best.

The Nine-Lives Mystic Cat is of a much higher status than ordinary rare birds and beasts; it is a spiritual creature nurtured by the creation of heaven and earth.

Other creatures such as the Nine-Tailed Fox and the Four Great Spirit Monkeys are also products of the creation of heaven and earth, and are not comparable to ordinary demons.

At this moment, Xuan Yu is like a nine-tailed fox with one tail cut off. If this were applied to a person, he would definitely be a disabled person with three deficiencies and five shortcomings.

Xu Qing looked at Xuan Yu, who suddenly seemed inferior, and thought to himself, "Do you want to see how many lives I have?"

He has no life, Mother Earth doesn't care, and God doesn't love him, but he still eats and drinks as usual, and can even touch the corpse after eating and drinking his fill. Doesn't he still live his life as usual?

A powerful zombie needs a powerful heart, even if it doesn't beat.

After thinking for a moment, Xu Qing decided to pass on the Immovable Technique he had just acquired to Xuan Yu.

The Immovable Dharma, ranked among the highest grades of the Earth category, allows the caster to remain undisturbed by external influences, with a mind as still as water and as immovable as a mountain. In addition, it can resist the erosion of illusions, suppress the disturbance of inner demons, and keep the mind clear and tranquil, so as not to lose oneself.

This method is almost useless when not in use, but if you encounter a demon who can create illusions or is good at bewitching, it is an absolute weapon of countermeasure.

Xuan Yu was still unaware of just how powerful this method was, but when Xu Qing said that he could remain unmoved even when faced with a feast of rats or fish, Xuan Yu immediately sensed the power of this method!

In the following days, besides going to the Yinhe Ancient Road to eat melons and watch the show, Xu Qing continued to promote his family's funeral business in Tianjin.

Nowadays, services such as moving the body for a funeral, performing funeral plays, and burning offerings at gravesites are no longer enough for Xu Qing. Therefore, the coroner's shop has recently added an additional value-added service: 'preparing funeral banquets'.

It is sad when someone dies, but the living also need to eat, right?
When relatives and friends come to help, you have to cook and entertain them, but the host family is often exhausted at this time, so where do they find the energy to take care of these chores?
No problem, the mortuary can do it!
Sun Erzhuang, also known as Fatty Sun, is the head chef of the restaurant. Xu Qing, seeing that he loves to eat and cook, simply passed on to him the lost recipes he had obtained through his spiritual practice, various cooking skills, and even the legendary skill of butchering an ox.

In funeral rites, in addition to entertaining relatives and friends when carrying the coffin and paying respects, a banquet is also held on the anniversary of the death of the deceased to invite guests to come and remember them.

This is what is known as attending a banquet.

That day, the Eight Banners Marshal of the Yinhe Ancient Road had just fought with the Yin Shi Fa Wang's ally, the Ghost King Duo'e. Neither of them was willing to use their full strength, as if they were just playing around, each wanting to wait for the Yin Shi Fa Wang to come out before revealing their lack of effort. Xu Qing watched anxiously, thinking, "Why don't you two fight already!" He even considered throwing another iron cannon into the Ghost King's tomb to fan the flames between them.

However, the Yin River is currently a battle of gods, and Xu Qing is somewhat worried. What if he really angers the two of them and they start fighting? When they are both exhausted, and the Yin Shi Dharma King, who is at full health, suddenly appears, who will fight him?

Furthermore, according to information obtained from the exorcism of the Cangyi rebels, Ji Lingzhou, the leader of the Cangyi Army who dominated the southwest, and Han Renshan, the elusive Holy Master of the Tianxin Sect, also arrived in Tianjin.

However, none of the weasels that carried the message, the crows that kept the message, or the omnipresent army of rats in the underground of Tianjin could find out the exact whereabouts of the two.

Xu Qing guessed that the two of them had probably gone to the Yinhe Ancient Road to join in the fun!

A group of outstanding individuals and heroes gathered together. Xu Qing felt it was best not to get too close. What if he got scratched or his identity was exposed? That would be terrible!
He even relies on his face to get banquets in Tianjin!

"What? The Bai family patriarch is going to hold a banquet to celebrate his anniversary, and a big one at that?"

Sure enough, Bai Zhaocai, the head of the Bai family who once hired an opera troupe to perform for his daughter's grave, has found Xu Qing again.

However, this time it was a funeral banquet for his father who had been dead for many years.

"My father worked hard all his life, but when he looked back, he never really enjoyed it. On the contrary, I, as his son, did nothing, yet I got such a large share of the family business and enjoy it every day."
A few nights ago, I dreamt of my father. He asked me if I had enough money, saying he was worried that he hadn't earned enough while he was alive, which would have made my life difficult.

As Bai Zhaocai spoke, he began to wipe away tears.

“I feel sorry for him, and I have to do something for him. So I thought of arranging a lively banquet for my father and inviting his old friends and acquaintances.”

"And his eldest grandson and great-grandson."

Having said all that, what else could Xu Qing say?
"Alright! I understand. Brother Bai, just tell me what kind of banquet you want to hold. As long as my coroner's shop can handle it, we will not hesitate!"

Upon hearing this, Bai Zhaocai immediately stopped wiping away his tears. He said expectantly, "I heard that our family has ghost operas and some kind of hot dances. We can invite girls and dancers from Miaoying Pavilion and Cuiyun Tower to dance and sing."

Xu Qing's slightly melancholic mood vanished instantly. For a moment, he couldn't tell whether this guy wanted him to watch the hot dance or wanted his dad to watch it.

Seeing Xu Qing's silence, Bai Zhaocai sighed and said, "My father never enjoyed any of that in his lifetime. The only time he went to a brothel to discuss business, I saw him and secretly told my mother. I am truly sorry to my father."

"Now I just want him to be happy after he dies. I'll fulfill the wishes he couldn't have in life!"

Xu Qing felt that something was off, but she couldn't quite put her finger on it. Although this good boy's way of showing filial piety was a bit unorthodox, his heart was good overall.

“Alright, I’ll make sure Brother Bai takes care of this.”

Having received the deposit, Xu Qing happily saw Bai Zhaocai off.

This anniversary funeral is a joyous occasion; there's no need to put on a solemn, dead face.

After seeing Bai Zhaocai off, Xu Qing stood at the door and shook his head.

Speaking of which, Bai Zhaocai is quite famous in Tianjin. His original name was not that, but Bai Yunsheng.

Because his father's surname was Bai and his mother's surname was Yun, he was given this name.

However, because his father spent his whole life in business and squandered the huge family fortune he had built, he got the nickname "Bai Zhaocai" (meaning "Bai brings wealth").

Bai Zhaocai doesn't mean he can't attract wealth or that he has money but nowhere to spend it. Rather, it means that Bai Yunsheng's money is all earned for free. He didn't put in any effort or use his brain; he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and became a wealthy gentleman without doing anything.

Isn't this just making money for nothing?
The people of Tianjin often gossip when they have nothing better to do, wondering how long it will take for Bai Zhaocai to squander the Bai family's fortune.

When the patriarch of the Bai family heard this, he didn't care at all. He told his son, "Don't worry about spending it. As long as we don't do business or get into gambling, our family's money is enough to last five or six generations!"

If you spend it sparingly, you could never spend it all in ten lifetimes!
Bai Zhaocai always remembered the dying words of the Bai family patriarch—

"Son, you're not cut out for business. As long as you don't go into business or gamble, our family's money is enough for generations to live on. Even if you marry ten or eight wives and have a hundred or eighty children, it will still be enough."

Bai Zhaocai wasn't particularly smart, but he wasn't stupid either. More importantly, he had been obedient since he was a child.

He always took Master Bai's words as a warning and kept them in mind.

He had already made his plans. Those capable people could turn their lives around and become wealthy shopkeepers even if given only ten taels of silver.

If his child has this talent in the future, he won't need to give him much capital; even with just pocket money, he can still make a name for himself!

But if his child dares to ask him for money to start a business, he will definitely nip the idea in the bud!

Three days later, at the Bai Mansion.

Bai Zhaocai had his servants carry the memorial tablet of the Bai family patriarch to his left and right, while he picked up a wine pot and cups and toasted each of the guests.

"On behalf of my father, I would like to offer a toast to everyone."

At this moment, Bai Zhaocai's status was equivalent to that of the Bai family patriarch. When he came to offer a toast, all his brothers and sisters of the same generation had to stand up and respectfully accompany him.

When encountering someone of a higher generation, Bai Zhaocai doesn't need to pay his respects.

On the contrary, after everyone finishes drinking, they have to say a few kind words to the memorial tablet next to Bai Zhaocai.

Xu Qing watched with amusement. This was the first time his shop had ever hosted a funeral banquet, and he still needed to gradually figure out the rules and principles involved.

After a while, when the funeral opera on stage was almost over, Xu Qing waved to the girls he had invited from the brothel. The girls, dressed in revealing clothes, swayed their slender waists and walked onto the stage with great charm.

The guests who attended the funeral banquet had never seen anything like this in their lives, not even in their past lives!
Not only were they surprised, but the madam and pimp, who had come to supervise the girls on-site for the first time out of concern for them, are still somewhat dazed.

Who would have thought that a funeral parlor would one day collaborate with a brothel?

Even if people in southern Yunnan have eaten a lot of mushrooms, they shouldn't have come up with such an unorthodox idea.

The key point is that there are actually people willing to pay for this service!

Xu Qing watched with great interest from below the stage, while Boss Liu next to him said sourly, "So what if they're wearing less clothing and showing more skin? What's so interesting about that?"

“Exactly! Boss Liu is right, this is too vulgar!” Xu Qing echoed without blinking.

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Liu Su'e gritted her teeth and stamped her feet, feeling anxious and wishing she could cover Xu Qing's eyes with her hands on the spot so that he couldn't see anything.

The guests at the Bai residence had certainly seen something new today. The women who had accompanied their husbands were all spitting in disgust, but they couldn't say anything.

Zhao Zhonghe and Bai Zhaocai's family had some connections, and he took a half-day off today to come and pay his respects to the Bai family patriarch.

As a result, this happened on stage.

The world is going to the dogs. I hope his children will be this filial in the future.
Seeing that the funeral banquet went well, Xu Qing felt much relieved. However, just as he relaxed and was about to quietly appreciate the art, two familiar figures suddenly appeared in his line of sight.

In a corner of the banquet, an old woman who had just arrived and a woman around forty years old were talking to Bai Zhaocai.

(End of this chapter)