EVA: Shinji Ikari Returns from Tiga

Chapter 73 It’s Not Your Fault!! [4000 Words 2-in-1!]

"So... Kaji-san, do you know why Father suddenly wants to call Ayanami to Matsushiro? I have a bad feeling..."

After leaving Misato Katsuragi's room, the two walked along the corridor of NERV, one in front of the other... Shinji Ikari asked as if talking to himself without even turning his head.

"No, I don't know the commander's specific plans. However... there's news that IPEA researchers have recently moved into the Matsushiro branch, and they're reportedly developing... a special weapon specifically for you."

"What?! A special weapon targeting me?? ...Ah, it's for Tiga."

Shinji Ikari smiled bitterly and shook his head. Before... it was the Victory Team that developed special weapons to deal with monsters. I didn't expect that the people here didn't think about how to fight monsters... no, fight the apostles... but developed special weapons to fight Ultraman Tiga.

——It’s really a changing world...it’s so ridiculous.

"Anyway, Mr. Kaji... the situation at the Matsushiro base is unclear. I hope you can agree to a request of mine."

In response to Shinji Ikari's attitude, Kaji Ryoji shrugged.

"Hey, boss... I lost the bet we made earlier... Now I'm willing to work for you like a slave. So if you need anything, just give me the orders... No need to ask for my opinion."

The previous bet - when Ryoji Kaji failed in his attempt to explore the secrets of the Final Dogma Zone and was disheartened... the agreement between him and Shinji Ikari was a bet on whether Asuka and Rei Ayanami could use human power to eliminate the apostles and protect themselves without Shinji Ikari's help.

As a result, the two girls lived up to everyone's expectations and succeeded. From that day on... Kaji Ryoji gave up his plan to destroy NERV on his own and chose to place the final bet on Shinji Ikari.

"Idiot, I don't need a slave who only obeys orders... I need comrades who can exercise their own initiative."

Shinji Ikari rolled his eyes at Ryoji Kaji... To be honest, when it comes to playing power games and commanding battles... Shinji Ikari wouldn't dare say that he knows it better than Gendō Ikari... So it's impossible for him to follow Gendō Ikari's way of forcing everyone to follow his orders like a machine.

"That's a tall order... Boss. I understand—what do you need me to do?"

After listening to Shinji Ikari's instructions, Ryoji Kaji was silent for a while... and then nodded solemnly.

"...After we land at Matsushiro Base, I want you to secure a quick evacuation... Besides, Asuka, Ayanami Rei... Touji, Sakura, and the squad leader... In the worst-case scenario, there are too many people who would like you to take them with you and escape first."

"Is the situation so serious?"

From what Shinji Ikari said, Kaji Ryoji also realized the seriousness of the situation... and restrained his frivolous tone.

According to Shinji Ikari, the entire Matsushiro base might be in danger.

"I don't have any evidence... I just have this vague, ominous feeling... Anyway, in case anything unexpected happens, I hope you can help me relieve my worries. Remember, your mission is not to protect me... but to help me protect the people I'm worried about."

"I see...By the way, Shinji-kun. Are you free tonight?"

"Eh?"

The sudden change of address and the flirtatious tone, this guy... why is he talking to me like he's hitting on a woman?

"Time, indeed... nothing important to do before we leave the day after tomorrow. What are you going to do?"

"Well, don't go home yet... come on a date with me."

"what!?"

For a moment, Shinji Ikari really thought that Kaji Ryoji's sexual orientation had been distorted because his plan to explore the secrets of NERV headquarters failed and he was overly shocked...

If that were the case, I could only try to fix it physically with my fists—but seeing Kaji Ryoji's slightly dejected expression... and the hint of sadness hidden in those seemingly frivolous eyes...

Shinji Ikari realized that maybe this man wasn't just playing a trick on him... maybe he really had something important to say to him...

"So, you asked me if I had time! You wanted me to come with you to farm the fields?!"

Just above the NERV headquarters, Ryoji Kaji had actually cultivated a watermelon field... The huge, round watermelons were already lying on the ground one after another, looking very adorable.

"I'm not plowing the fields, I'm picking watermelons... Look, they're ripe and ready to eat."

Kaji Ryoji's movements were light and skillful. He first tapped the watermelon gently, and when he felt the satisfying touch, he immediately cut the vine with a knife. After taking the round watermelon off, he directly cut it into four parts with a knife.

“Come and eat…”

Obviously, asking Shinji Ikari to come over was not really intended to let him do farm work, and no melon knife was prepared for Shinji Ikari, but the watermelon was handed to him.

“…Did you plant it?”

I never thought Kaji Ryoji would have such a hobby... However, the sight of him busy and sweating in the fields... unexpectedly suits this man.

"Yeah... being able to create something with my own hands... that feeling is both unexpected and delightful."

Crunch—I took a bite without hesitation. Hmm… as expected, it tasted unpleasant. After all, I'm not a serious melon farmer… The taste wasn't sweet, but rather a thick… earthy flavor.

"Is it delicious?"

Looking at Shinji Ikari eating the melon without any hesitation, Ryoji Kaji asked with a smile.

"not at all."

"Hey hey——"

"But this low-quality melon with a hint of earth and grass is also a unique experience..."

After hearing Shinji's answer, Kaji Ryoji smiled with relief, and then... the atmosphere changed.

"Shinji-kun... I haven't told you the reason why I became a spy for NERV, the Japanese government, and SEELE."

"... "

Shinji Ikari didn't answer and continued to eat melons... As expected, the purpose of bringing me here... Kaji Ryoji's intention was to show Shinji Ikari everything about himself... Then, there was no reason for me to interrupt, I should just listen obediently.

"Fifteen years ago... the Second Impact. Everything in this world changed—the world was on the verge of destruction, the city's functions were completely paralyzed... there was no food or water... there was no safe place, people fought and even cannibalized each other for a piece of bread... My father and mother also died at that time."

The past that Ryoji Kaji recounted was even more serious than Shinji Ikari had expected...leaving him in no position to interrupt.

"Later... after the situation stabilized a little, my twelve-year-old brother and I depended on each other and were placed in a government-arranged care center. But in the second impact, there were more than millions of children who lost their parents... The government-arranged welfare homes were simply not enough. Crammed into a small room, we fought all the time over a piece of meat, a glass of water, a bed to sleep on." Shinji Ikari could guess the scene without even thinking - hell on earth.

When the morals and laws that we are so proud of are trampled upon...human beings return to their most primitive animal instincts...plundering and biting each other.

"Later on, we couldn't take it anymore... My brother, a few good friends, and I escaped from the orphanage. How stupid... Even the welfare institutions set up by the government for children were such a mess, how could the outside world be any kinder? It's a pity - we were too young to understand this."

Kaji Ryoji was smiling, but even though he was smiling…his heart was crying. That self-blaming smile was just a disguise for the numbness that had formed behind the countless wounds in his heart.

"We couldn't find food or water... To survive, we resorted to stealing and cheating... Then, one day, one of the children... discovered a military warehouse filled with emergency rations. Because of the chaos of the Second Impact and the lax management... we saw it as a lifeline. Because too many people acting together would be too conspicuous, we sent one person each day... to steal food for six people at a time."

"...Tsk."

Hearing this... Shinji Ikari couldn't help but click his tongue and frowned... In the chaotic apocalypse where there are no rules and controls... they actually stole supplies from a violent organization - Shinji Ikari had already seen the end of Kaji Ryoji and his group.

"You are indeed very perceptive...Shinji-kun."

Ryoji Kaji gave a smile that was uglier than crying.

"...That day, it was my turn to steal supplies. Then... I accidentally dropped a can while trying to grab one... The noise attracted the guards. They beat me, kicked me, pointed guns at my head... They said they knew I was part of a gang... and demanded I tell them where the others were hiding."

"...!"

Realizing that the ending of this story might be even more disgusting than he had imagined, Shinji Ikari stood up.

"Okay! I already know... no need to say more."

Seeing Shinji Ikari's reaction, Kaji Ryoji's already dim eyes showed a hint of gratitude... but he ignored Shinji Ikari's attempts to stop him and continued talking to himself.

"I'm afraid of death, really... I'm really afraid of death. Just feeling the cold muzzle of a gun... I don't know anything anymore... So... I told them my location... Even though I knew everyone was waiting for me to return. Even though I knew... my brother was still hungry, waiting for me to bring him food..."

Shinji Ikari roughly grabbed Ryoji Kaji's collar and pulled him in front of him, forcibly interrupting this sad story, staring into Ryoji Kaji's eyes, and roaring word by word.

"I told you to stop saying that! It's not your fault!"

When he heard the words "It's not your fault," Kaji Ryoji's body trembled as if he had received an electric shock, and he answered with a voice that was almost about to cry.

"Haha... I'm so happy, Shinji-kun... I... I dreamt that someone would say this to me... But, no - because... I killed them - I killed everyone... I killed my only remaining... family."

There is no greater sorrow than a dead heart... As Kaji Ryoji recounted his past... he could no longer cry. With a smile of numb despair, he explained everything to Ikari Shinji.

"...I'll say this one last time, it's not your fault...If you keep saying it, I'll punch you. One punch for every word you say."

Unbuttoning Kaji Ryoji's collar, Shinji Ikari sat side by side in the melon field with Kaji, who had collapsed to the ground, feeling the soft, damp soil beneath them.

"Later, I regretted it to death... I even considered suicide. But—I realized... if it hadn't been for the Second Impact... nothing would have turned out like this. My brother, my parents, and I would have been able to live together in health... When I realized this, I vowed... to get to the bottom of the Second Impact."

After hearing this, Shinji Ikari could understand why Ryoji Kaji was so heartbroken when he found out during the power outage that the information he had was not leading to "Lilith's room" in the deepest part of the Final Dogma area, but to Rei Ayanami's room.

Because... he only had that one chance, and now he must have been guarded against by Ikari Gendo... He hasn't been liquidated yet only because he still has value, but another chance is impossible.

He could no longer...find out the truth about the second impact by himself.

"So you became a spy?"

"Ah... yes, the Japanese government, NERV, and SEELE... To get closer to the truth about the Second Impact, I can climb up at any cost... even if it means breaking up with Katsuragi. I have to give up my own happiness... This is to atone for my brother. I was the one who killed them... Gugua!"

A powerful right straight punch knocked Kaji Ryoji into the watermelon field and kissed the watermelons - Tiga Compound Punch.jpg.

"...?"

After a long pause, Kaji Ryoji finally got up from the field in a daze. Obviously, he didn't expect that Ikari Shinji would really beat him up, and beat him so violently... In an instant, Kaji Ryoji saw stars and his brain went blank.

However... thanks to this punch, all the guilt and self-blame that had been clinging to Ryoji Kaji's heart like a thorn in his flesh were wiped out, leaving only a clear and confused look on his face.

"...Oh my god...my molars are loose...Boss, your fist is ten times more terrifying than Katsuragi's..."

"I mean what I said. If you continue, I'll beat you up. If you dare to continue, I'll definitely beat you up."

Seeing that Kaji Ryoji's tone and address had returned to normal after his punch, Ikari Shinji reached out his hand towards Kaji with satisfaction.

"Get up, we've talked long enough, it's time to go back."

"…it is good."

Putting aside the nostalgia for the past...Ryoji Kaji has returned to being the frivolous and greasy man he used to be.

But——I still can’t help but fantasize…

"Boss, if... you were there at that time, you would definitely—"

"Fool…"

He cursed with a smile, interrupting Kaji Ryoji's fantasy.

"What has already happened...there are no ifs or what-ifs. Don't be bound by the past—what has happened cannot be changed, and those who have passed away cannot return...What we need to do now is to protect the present and use it to create a better future."

Shinji Ikari's words were beautiful and full of will, and even Ryoji Kaji, who was just wrapped in grief, was infected by his spirit.

"It's truly poetic... beautiful words that I can't help but repeat... Boss, if I had met you ten years earlier... surely... something... would have changed."

"Ha—what nonsense are you talking about... Mr. Kaji? What do you mean by ten years earlier? It's not too late now. And... it's not that something will change, but... you will change something with your own hands."

“…!!”

This time, Kaji Ryoji really made up his mind - as long as he followed this boy... something crucial would really change... no, he could really - change something with his own hands!
[Author’s words:
Why would I write a 4000-word two-in-one for the second time in a day? (It’s messy!!!)]

(End of this chapter)