Some little things
These past two days, I've felt anxious every time I click to publish, then I check to see if the familiar IDs are still there. Reading this far, I feel incredibly grateful to every one of my dear readers.
Some readers really want Zhaozhao to just say it directly and reveal her identity as soon as possible. I feel the same way, but I'm afraid it will create a bad reading experience for everyone, and I'm wondering if the later plot is necessary.
(I also wavered at one point, thinking that revealing one's identity was the goal. But Zhao Zhao is not like that. She doesn't live just to reveal her gender, but to find herself.)
The mother, too, is going through a very difficult time. Losing her child has been a profound blow to her.
Every character here has their own story. Their significance isn't simply to discover, "Oh, Zhao Zhao is a girl."
This afternoon I saw a comment from a girl who said she was very worried about Zhao Zhao. But because of her own experience, she quickly understood Zhao Zhao's behavior and saw a reflection of reality in some of the characters. At that moment, I truly felt like I saw a ray of light.
On the timeline, only one day had passed since she hesitated before finally confessing. If it could be resolved in a single sentence, it certainly could. But is that all people really want to see?
Being honest about her identity is important to her; it's the mark of her becoming "me." But her transformation is equally important. When she first met her cousin Wanhua, she would never have confronted her so openly, but now she will. She gets angry when Lin Shi is "bullied," and she proactively calls her mother; she is changing.
Her feigned sarcasm towards Lin Wanhua, her keen observation of the atmosphere, and her answer regarding the reason for renting the apartment all reflect her personality and growth.
From the beginning of this article until now, I haven't really analyzed her inner thoughts in detail. Everyone's impression of her is their own perception. What one perceives, and how much, is all a matter of fate.
I have so much to say, including expressions of gratitude, that I wanted to put in the epilogue, but the urge to write it has reached its peak these past two days. I'm afraid that some of my most important words, those of the people who have given me so much, won't see them.
In any case, thank you so much!
(End of this chapter)
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