Puzzle Madness

Chapter 163 Rain Rust (Part Six)

DouDou pulled out the family's cassette player from the corner of the room. The player used size D batteries, which were quite large, and two batteries would last a long time; it could even work during a power outage.

I often see ads for Walkmans on TV, but I haven't bought one; they're expensive and delicate, and I always feel like they'd break if I weren't careful, which doesn't meet my needs.

"Haha, I've always wondered what people talk about on these forum tapes?"

The rumbling thunder outside the window sounded like a giant beast rolling, causing the entire building to tremble. He rubbed his hands together, then, in the dim light, inserted the cassette tape into the player and pressed the triangular play button.

With a click, the spool started spinning the tape, accompanied by a slight hissing noise, like someone coughing quietly next door.

To his surprise, the tape contained more than just strange tales or news about "new monsters being discovered."

A burst of "Erquan Yingyue" with added bass drum, gradually increasing in speed, sounded somewhat eerie amidst the torrential rain outside the window.

There was no introduction, no opening remarks, and no date; the tape introduction was straightforward.

However, the first thing DouDou heard was a request for help in finding business partnerships:

Subject: The possibility of [Salmonella Sulfate] surpassing Coca-Cola -- Seeking partners. Contributor: [Business Brain]

"I'm currently developing a beverage with a bright future, poised to replace Coca-Cola's market position. The tentative name is [Sulfuric Acid Sarsaparilla], and the advertising slogan will be something like this: [Don't spill the sulfuric acid, drink it!]"

"Sulfuric acid is cheaper than phosphoric acid, the acidity regulator in cola, and will not harm the human body when the concentration is right. It is also more adventurous and more suitable for the youth market, making it easy to launch complementary marketing."

The man had a very neurotic voice. Each syllable was short and abrupt, as if he couldn't hold his breath and was oxygen-deprived; there was also a hint of drowsiness from prolonged insomnia.

As DouDou listened, she wondered if the person was standing in a public restroom when they recorded the audio, as the echo had a hollow, undulating quality.
"Sulfate ions are difficult for the intestines to absorb, creating a hypertonic environment in the intestines; this causes water to permeate into the intestines, leading to diarrhea. This not only promotes the consumer's metabolism but also makes drinking beverages more fun. Even if it is not sold as a beverage, it is expected to seize the laxative market and compete with glycerin suppositories."

"Furthermore, copying my ideas is strictly prohibited! I may apply for patents at any time, so please do not break the law."

"Those interested in collaboration, please give us a call."

DouDou yawned, pressed the fast-forward button, and turned the unfinished phone number into a string of gibberish.

"--I feel like I've heard of something like [sulfuric acid soda] before? It's not that trendy."

He had never drunk sulfuric acid before: but DouDou felt that the most important thing about a beverage's sales was how it tasted—this [sulfuric acid sarsaparilla] sounded more like a weight-loss drug.

Although if the supermarket at the entrance of the community were to actually sell [sarcodone sulfate], he would probably buy a bottle to try it out; after all, it sounds quite stimulating.

I don't know if the A and B sides of the cassette tapes are all these strange investment promotions; I don't have any spare money in my pocket to invest.

"It's not going to be full of this kind of stuff, is it? That would be a bit boring." *Snap*

DouDou reopened the player's cassette slot and looked at the date label on the cassette tape casing.

This forum tape was recorded around the last week of summer vacation; at that time, he had just gotten into a fight with that section chief aunt in Shouzhu 151.

"The content isn't quite what I expected? It's not that it's bad, but I'd like to hear something more interesting."

DouDou scratched his nose, closed the cassette player again, and pressed the play button. He casually picked up the A4 sheet of paper that had been sent with the cassette tape, intending to listen to it while reading it.

The A4 paper didn't contain much special content. The front had a polite congratulatory message: congratulations to DouDou for his successful application to join the "Super Psychological Exploration" reader exchange group; thank you for his continued support of the magazine.

On the other side are the rules for joining the "forum" of the enthusiasts' exchange group; they are divided into many sections, all of which are rules.

If I want to post on this forum, what specifications should the submitted tapes be in? What is the maximum duration of a single post? How can I participate in discussions with other enthusiasts? How long is the delay and review period after each post before it appears on the next forum tape?
A long list was provided, but there were no restrictions on the topics to be submitted: theoretically, DouDou could very well hear complaints about disharmonious married life, noise from upstairs and downstairs renovations, or even answers to school final exams in these forum recordings.

However, the editors probably have their own preferences when it comes to reviewing submissions, since they can decide which submissions to include in the forum tapes—ultimately, this is still a forum for readers and enthusiasts of "Super Psychological Exploration".
-
DouDou listened half-heartedly, her eyes scanning the lines of text on the A4 paper; she was multitasking. The forum tape was quite substantial; including both sides, it was estimated to be over an hour long.

Why don't tape drives have a function that can directly locate the timeline? It's like listening to songs on imported CDs; you can't switch between songs one by one, you can only fast-forward, rewind, or flip the disc.
The readership of "Super Psychological Exploration" is quite extensive. In addition to submissions from the Autonomous Prefecture of Cochinchina, there are also many letters from mainland China and Southeast Asia; there are even readers from overseas who speak broken Chinese.

However, the location of most of the themes on the tape was unclear. Then, another strange and unusual submission appeared:

Subject: [Murder in outer space]. Contributor: [Mr. Zhou Xincheng, who runs a Thai milk tea shop in Penang].

"This is my first submission. Hello everyone."

"Don't you all think the [Future Destiny] mission is a complete hoax? I know many people will question me. But I'm quite certain that with humanity's current level of technology, we are still a long way from safely landing on Mars; let alone sending three astronauts to Mars on our first mission."

"This is absolutely a murder disguised as scientific exploration! Perhaps even more terrifying, it's a sacrifice."

"I wonder if anyone remembers the topic proposed by a fellow enthusiast last year, which was, uh, should be called [Pan-Solar System Land God Hypothesis]? Those who remember can look back at the previous tapes."

"I still remember it vividly. He seemed to have proposed something called 'cosmic enthusiasm,' which really shocked me."

"So, the three astronauts might also be offerings from various countries to the [Cosmic Land God], using their lives as tribute in exchange for the [God of Space] not invading Earth. What do you think?"

"I welcome everyone to discuss this with me. Also, could the editorial department please keep me anonymous? Thank you."

(End of this chapter)