Eternal madness

Chapter 35 Give Me Back My Bowl (High-energy content in this chapter)
The old helmsman picked up the jar, shook it near his ear, and a rustling sound came from inside.

"The quality isn't very good either..."

Zhang Laifu said, "Listen more carefully, I think the quality is quite good."

Is this the truth?

Zhang Laifu thought it counted; from the perspective of cremated remains, the quality should be quite good.

The old helmsman asked Zhang Laifu, "Why?"

Zhang Laifu was covered in sweat. He didn't know how to answer. The old helmsman could tell the truth from the lies. If you lied to him, he would easily see through it!
The old helmsman asked again, "Why is it kept in the jar?"

After thinking for a moment, Zhang Laifu simply lied: "The shop owner told me that high-quality snuff should be stored in jars."

"Is it?"

"Yes!"

"Didn't you lie to me?"

"With all my heart!"

"Nonsense! This isn't even top-grade snuff!" Old Tuozi kicked Zhang Laifu again. Zhang Laifu's voice hadn't been honest at all; it was clear he was lying.

“The senior is right, this is not high-quality snuff.” Zhang Laifu’s clothes were soaked with sweat, and he couldn’t think of a better explanation.

The old helmsman angrily retorted, "I don't smoke snuff, but I've seen snuff before. Good snuff is always kept in boxes; the stuff kept in jars is all inferior! You've been trying to embezzle from me again!"

Zhang Laifu did not deny it. You say he embezzled, so be it!

The old helmsman asked, "Did you buy enough this time?"

"I bought enough!" Zhang Laifu answered loudly. This was the truth. In Wanshengzhou, one jin was sixteen liang, and Zhang Laifu had indeed bought one jin. Whether he had been paid for or not was another matter.

Old Tuozi grabbed Zhang Laifu with his left hand and carried the porcelain jar with his right, walking towards the ancestral hall.

Zhang Laifu clutched the medicine in his hand, ready to fight to the death.

Old Tuozi smiled at Zhang Laifu: "Laifu, don't be afraid. It doesn't matter if the snuff is of slightly lower quality. We're not picky about this kind of snuff."

"Really? This bowl looks like a real, solid bowl." Zhang Laifu feigned surprise, but his voice still trembled slightly.

“Silly boy, you’re a very honest person. I can tell you’re scared. But that’s alright. Once the soil is filled in and the bowl is opened, we’ll have to plant the seeds. Guess what kind of seeds I’m going to plant?” The old helmsman’s smile grew even more benevolent.

Without hesitation, Zhang Laifu replied, "Skilled hands can grow amazing things!"

Old Tuozi carried Zhang Laifu into the ancestral hall: "I don't need to be skilled. I was a craftsman to begin with, and my skills are excellent."

“But I don’t have any skills!” Zhang Laifu looked at the oversized hat, which used to only fit on his head but could now hold two people.

Inside the hat, smoke and dust swirled like a pot of boiled porridge.

"It doesn't matter if you don't have any skills, my skills are your skills, Laifu. From now on, we're one person. With me here, no one can bully you!"

The old helmsman lifted Zhang Laifu next to the hat, the aroma of snuff wafting through the air. With just a little more force, the old helmsman could push Zhang Laifu into the hat.

"Senior, you have such a kind heart!" Zhang Laifu stood on the brim of his hat, reached into his pocket with his right hand, and twisted open the cap of the medicine bottle.

"Laifu, don't be afraid. From now on, we'll live together as father and son. That's not a bad thing!"

“Senior, I know it’s a good thing. You don’t need to hold on so tightly. If you keep holding on, this urn will never open!” Zhang Laifu kept staring at the urn.

"You care so much about this jar? Do you think I don't know what you're up to? Do you think I don't know you have something on you?" Old Master snatched the medicine from Zhang Laifu's hand, threw it on the ground, and smashed the bottle to pieces!

"Laifu, is there poison in this bottle? Are you trying to poison me?"

poison?

The old helmsman seems to have misunderstood something.

Zhang Laifu didn't speak. He tore off a piece of cloth from his clothes and tried to dip some medicine in the ground.

The old helmsman laughed and said, "Where did you get this poison? Which expert gave it to you? Do you think this stuff can kill me?"

Zhang Laifu touched the medicine with the cloth, but Lao Tuozi also heard the sound.

"Silly boy, try harder, get more medicine, see if you can poison me." The old helmsman released Zhang Laifu, snatched the cloth, and ate it.

"Zhang Laifu, look closely, I'm a ghost! Your poison won't work on me, not even the alarm clock's poison!"

What alarm clock did he say? Was it his wind-up alarm clock? Can that thing release poison?
Zhang Laifu didn't have time to think about this. Taking advantage of the old helmsman letting go, he took off running.

Old Helmsman appeared in a flash and grabbed Zhang Laifu back: "You silly boy, what's wrong with you? You dare to play tricks on me?"
"Let me tell you the truth, if you bought less snuff, you might live a couple more days. But once you buy enough snuff, you're done for!"

As he spoke, the old helmsman shook the urn again: "The appearance is a bit poor, but our bowl is good, we won't complain!"

As soon as he finished speaking, the old helmsman opened the urn with one hand and poured all the powder inside into his hat.

He fell down!

He used his own ashes as snuff and poured them into his hat.

The hat trembled, and the powder inside churned, almost knocking Zhang Laifu over.

"Silly boy, you're on your way. From now on, when you mention my name in Wansheng Prefecture, you'll have to be included too. You're just sneaking around..."

Old Helmsman pulled hard, trying to pull Zhang Laifu into the hat, but he couldn't budge him.

He suddenly felt his hands lose strength. "This...this isn't right," the old helmsman said, his smile fading.

“Isn’t that right?” Zhang Laifu grabbed a handful of sawdust from his pocket and slapped it onto the old helmsman’s face.

The sawdust was scraped off from the waterwheel outside the door. Zhang Laifu couldn't bear to throw it away and kept it in his pocket.

Wood chips stuck to his face, and the old helmsman felt a long-lost, sharp pain.

It hurt, it really hurt this time. It felt like thousands of tiny knives were gouging at his face, cutting through the skin and then burrowing into the flesh. The pain made Old Tuozi feel like his sense of touch, which he had lost for many years, was almost back.

Old Helmsman was trembling with pain and could no longer hold onto Zhang Laifu. Zhang Laifu took the opportunity to break free from Old Helmsman and jumped to a distance.

The old helmsman endured the excruciating pain, listening to the voice from inside the top hat: "Was what I just poured into the bowl snuff?"

"Do you think so?" Zhang Laifu asked in return.

"You're lying to me? You dare to lie to me about something this big? What was that thing just now?" Old Tuozi reached out to grab Zhang Laifu, but he missed.

There was a strong gravitational pull from inside the hat, which held his body and made him move much slower than before.

This gravitational pull felt remarkably similar to the sensation of his body collapsing before he died.

The old helmsman was terrified.

"I'm not lying to you, I've bought all the snuff, I just haven't had time to give it to you yet!" Zhang Laifu stepped forward and kicked the old helmsman. He tried to kick the old helmsman into his hat, but the old helmsman grabbed the brim and climbed out of the hat.

“This is my body, and you put my body into the bowl…” The old helmsman’s voice trembled.

“You put your body in there yourself, you’ve finally found your body, that’s a good thing!” Zhang Laifu kicked the old helmsman again.

"You really are a fucking idiot!" The old helmsman grabbed the brim of his hat with one hand and pulled an alarm clock from his pocket with the other, starting to wind it up.

"What right do you have to bully an idiot?" Zhang Laifu stepped forward, snatched the alarm clock, and kicked the old helmsman.

Old Tuozi reached out, trying to grab Zhang Laifu's leg.

Zhang Laifu quickly pulled his leg back; if he were pulled, he would have to go inside the hat as well.

Old Helmsman continued to climb out, gripping the brim of his hat. Although the ashes had entered the hat, they had not been completely refined, and he still had the strength to fight against the hat.

He slowly extended his right hand and patted his chest.

boom!
The drum maker's skill is unparalleled; a single strike determines the tone.

The drums sounded, but the old helmsman wasn't strong enough, and the sound wasn't loud enough. Zhang Laifu wasn't in the ancestral hall, so the attack failed.

Where did Zhang Laifu go?

Did he run away in fright?

Where did they run off to?

Let's ignore him for now and find the seeds first.

The old helmsman is insightful; even in this predicament, he can still find a way to respond.

If suitable seeds are found and placed inside the cap, allowing the cap and seeds to interact, it might be possible to preserve the ashes.

There were two skilled craftsmen under the table, and these were the right seeds. The old helmsman resisted the pull of the hat and struggled to stand up. Just as he was about to walk toward the offering table, he suddenly heard a noise outside the door.

Clang!

Zhang Laifu, wearing a short jacket covered in talismans, rushed over pushing his cart.

He gets dressed quickly; that's the skill of an extra.

Originally, the waterwheel couldn't have entered the ancestral hall through the main gate, but the old helmsman pushed down half of the wall near the gate, and Zhang Laifu pushed the waterwheel into the ancestral hall with all his might.

"Zhang Laifu, I'll take your life!" The old helmsman pounded his chest with his fist.

Bang! Bang! Two muffled thuds.

Zhang Laifu felt a resonance in his chest cavity, and his heart felt like it was about to explode.

"If you want my life, I won't give it to you!" Zhang Laifu gritted his teeth and endured, his body trembling.

"You little bastard, you must die here today!" The old helmsman roared, pounding his head.

Bang! Bang! Two more muffled thuds!

Zhang Laifu suffered a cracked forehead and blurred vision, nearly falling over.

"You old bastard, you'll definitely die before me!" Zhang Laifu, his face covered in blood, gritted his teeth, pushed the cart, and continued to rush forward.

"Laifu, listen to me..." The old helmsman panicked, not knowing how Zhang Laifu had managed to block out his drumbeats.

He tried to buy some time, but Zhang Laifu kept going and charged forward with all his might.

The old helmsman swung his fist wide and slammed it into his own cheek; this was his last gamble.

Bang!

Zhang Laifu rushed ahead, pushing the waterwheel and crashing it into the old helmsman. The old helmsman and the waterwheel, along with the waterwheel, all crashed into the hat.

P.S.: Zhang Laifu never said those four words in the title, but I heard Laifu shout them.

(End of this chapter)