daddy long legs

Chapter 66

dear uncle:
I had a hard time writing this letter, not knowing how to write it.But I have made up my mind and I cannot go back on my word.You are so generous and kind of you to send me on a trip to Europe for the summer - I really want to go.But I think again and again, I still have to reject you.It is so illogical that I rejected your offer of tuition money and now spend it on fun.You shouldn't have gotten me into the bad habit of wanting to live a life of luxury.People don't think about things they've never had.But once those luxuries are taken for granted that he or she (another language is needed here) can never live without.Living in the same room as Sally and Julia challenged my simple life.They have it all from childhood and take it for granted.In their view, everything they want is deserved, or the world owes them.Maybe the world really owed them—at any rate, the world understood the debt and was ready to pay it.But to me, the world owes nothing, and I've understood that unequivocally from the start.I have no right to credit or debt, and if I do, the world may one day deny my claim.

I seem to be struggling with a bunch of metaphors - hope you get the gist.In any case, I have deeply realized that the most correct thing to do this summer is to teach and live on my own.

6/10

I just finished writing this - guess what happened?The maid brought Master Jervie's card.He was also going abroad this summer, not with Julia's family, but alone.I told him that you also invited me and a lady who would take care of the girls.He knows you, uncle.That is to say, he knew that my parents were dead, and that a kind old gentleman had sent me to college, but I didn't have the guts to tell him all about the John Gorier Orphanage.He thought you were some distant relation or family friend of mine.I didn't say I didn't know you - that would be strange!

All in all, he insisted that I go to Europe.He said, this is an indispensable part of my education and I should not refuse it.At the same time, he said that he would be in Paris, and we might slip away from the lady who accompanied me and take care of me, and go to some elegant and interesting places to eat.

Oh, Uncle, this really fascinates me!I'm a little shaken. If he wasn't so authoritarian, I might actually agree.I can take emotional advice, but I can't be forced to.He said I was a stupid, unreasonable, cranky, stubborn kid (that was just one of the words he called me, I can't remember many others), and that I didn't know what to do and should obey the elders advice.We almost got into an argument - I can't say for sure, but we did.

Anyway, I quickly packed my bags and headed here.Before I finish writing this letter, I hope you can see the bridge behind me.My escape routes are burning in flames, and by now they should be completely reduced to ashes.At the moment, I'm at Clifftop (the name of Mrs. Patterson's beach house), the clothes are unboxed and hung, and Florence (her young daughter) is learning to inflect nouns.She's a typical spoiled kid, and I had to teach her how to deal with reading first—before, she couldn't get her hands on anything but ice cream and soda.

We study in a quiet corner of Hilltop Gardens - Mrs. Paterson doesn't want me to take them outdoors - but, I have to say, it's hard to think seriously beside the blue sea and cruise ships !Especially when I think of myself sailing off to a foreign country on a ship—but I don't let myself keep thinking about things other than schoolwork.

Lo and behold!Uncle, I resolutely resisted the temptation and devoted myself to my work.Please don't be angry, don't think that I am ungrateful for your kindness, I will be grateful to you, always, always.The only thing I can repay you is to be a useful citizen (are women citizens? It seems not).All in all, a very useful person.You can say, "I've contributed a very useful person to the world."

Sounds pretty good, doesn't it, uncle?But I also don't want to give you the illusion.I often feel like I'm average, and I'm often overwhelmed by that feeling.It's fun planning for the future because I'm probably just as ordinary as everyone else.In the end, you can only marry and have a bunch of children.

your forever judy
mongronia

4 days later
(End of this chapter)