The Republic is so violent

Chapter 151: Born to be a monstrous evildoer who disrupts China (4)
Wang Yitang turned around and said seriously: "Teacher, who do you think Yuan Shikai is?"He is the contemporary Cao Cao, the contemporary Jia Sidao, the contemporary Yan Song, the contemporary... that who, in short, all the treacherous officials throughout the ages are added together, and that is Yuan Shikai.Such a thief in troubled times, who do you think he is most afraid of?Is it Sun Wen of the Revolutionary Party?No!Is it the imperial powers?No!Is it Japanese?No!Is it his wife?No!Yuan Shikai, a traitor and traitor, is not afraid of heaven and earth. The only thing in the world that scares him is you, teacher.Teacher, do you know that Yuan Shikai was gnashing his teeth even when he was sleeping and dreaming at night, and he wanted to kill the teacher and then hurry up.But teacher, you are pedantic about heaven and man, and you are unique in the world. Yuan Shikai dare not do anything.

Speaking of this, Wang Yitang suddenly raised his voice: Teacher, Yuan Shikai wanted to kill you but didn't dare to kill you, just like Cao A concealed from you Zhengping, so those who dare not want to bear the name of killer for generations to come!That's why that traitor Yuan Shikai set up a sinister trap. He didn't personally order you to be killed, but deliberately put you under house arrest to stir up your anger and make you go on a hunger strike.The teacher died on a hunger strike. That is the teacher, you want to die yourself, and you are in the arms of the traitor Yuan Shikai.I'm crying, I'm crying that my teacher is so stupid, fell into Yuan Shikai's tricks, went on a hunger strike to seek death without knowing it, how sad it is... sad, really sad, woo...

Wang Yitang's words only made Zhang Taiyan cry and sweat profusely.He thought about it carefully, yes, Wang Yitang was right.If I starve myself to death, what does it have to do with Yuan Shikai?Why am I so careless?I should be alive. Only by being alive can I add trouble to Yuan Shikai, and make him cry when he thinks that there is such a person in the world.

Yes, just do it!

Immediately Zhang Taiyan yelled: "Come here, bring me an elbow, sir, I'm hungry!"
The gendarmes outside were in a hurry and ran to the kitchen to steam elbows for Mr. Zhang Taiyan.Wang Yi and Tang laughed loudly, and went back to meet Yuan Shikai on business.

12 He is crazier than his cousin

After Wang Yitang left, Huang Kan, Mr. Zhang Taiyan's most proud disciple, ran over.

Speaking of Huang Kan, he is really a natural born evildoer, making countless scholars in the world crazy about him.In the early years, Mr. Zhang Taiyan traveled east to Japan, determined to overthrow the Qing government and save China from peril. At that time, the living environment was extremely bad. The old man lived in a small room, with a single candle, a few broken books, and only a few mouthfuls of oatmeal in a few days Biscuit, but still keep fighting.

On this day, the old man was struggling in the small room, holding a book and eating oatmeal biscuits, when suddenly he heard a splash, a turbid yellow liquid fell from the sky and sprinkled on the old man's head.Old Mr. Zhang Taiyan put his finger between the wings of his nose and smelled it, um, it smells fishy, ​​it's human urine.

How did human urine spill from the sky?
Mr. Zhang Taiyan suddenly realized that there was that wicked person standing upstairs and urinating downstairs.The old man was furious, pointing upstairs and yelling.I saw a young man rushing down from upstairs, pointing at Zhang Taiyan's nose and cursing back, meaning that he is very learned, and it was really an honor for you, Zhang Taiyan, to urinate on Mr. Zhang Taiyan's head, and it is wrong for you to scold .

Old Mr. Taiyan was so angry that his eyes were on fire. He was known as a lunatic, but he met someone who was even crazier than him. The two immediately started to scold each other. Only by learning can we live up to the title of "Master of Chinese Studies".The two scolded to the end, the old Mr. Taiyan scolded more and more courageously, and the more he scolded, the more inspired he became, but because the other party was young, he finally lost the battle and said: "Mr., you are more knowledgeable than me, and you are better at cursing than I am. Huang Kan was convinced and would like to worship you as his teacher.

After all, Huang Kan knelt down and kowtowed, and became the eldest disciple of Mr. Zhang Taiyan, and also the most promising disciple.

However, knowledge is harmful, especially when encountering Mr. Huang Kan, a heterogeneous person whose knowledge is inversely proportional to character, it will kill people more than life.

In the early years, Huang Kan had a cousin named Huang Shaolan, who was a famous female talent at that time.Huang Kan ran to pursue her, Huang Shaolan said: Cousin, did you make a mistake?You have a wife, and you haven't divorced your wife now, how can you arrange me?

Huang Kan laughed and said: Don't be afraid, cousin, I have a trick.Let's go to apply for a marriage certificate together. On the marriage certificate, instead of my real name, write a pseudonym.That way, my wife won't know.When I divorce her, let's restore our real names, what do you think?

The little cousin Huang Shaolan was so stupid, she believed her cousin's words and asked Huang Kan to get a marriage certificate with her under a false name.After marriage, the two have a deep affection, which is easy to talk about.But one morning Huang Kan got up and said to his little cousin Huang Shaolan: Cousin, you wait on the bed, I will come when I go to the bathroom.Having said this he went out, and never returned.

When she was newly married, her husband disappeared, and Huang Shaolan was so puzzled that she searched everywhere.I finally heard that my husband had gone to Beijing Women's Normal University long ago and married a gentle Suzhou girl.Huang Shaolan chased after Beijing in surprise and asked Huang Kan to explain, but Huang Kan said: Cousin, did you make a mistake? Your marriage certificate says another person’s name, which has nothing to do with me. Why did you come to find me? And me?

Hearing what Huang Kan said, little cousin Huang Shaolan went crazy all of a sudden.

There is no way not to be crazy, do you think what Huang Kan did is a human matter?

But Huang Kan didn't think there was anything wrong with him. His cousin went crazy when he loved it. He was even more crazy than his cousin, so he came to his teacher Zhang Taiyan to set up a fight.When he arrived at the place, he found that Zhang Taiyan was extremely poor and bored, taking pleasure in teasing the gendarmerie guarding him.He ordered these gendarmerie policemen to address themselves as "Master" and to guests as "Master" and "Master".

Huang Kan was very happy when he saw this, but when he picked up the chopsticks to eat, he frowned.

It turns out that Mr. Huang Kan loves beauty first, and he will leave after sleeping with his pants up, and he will never be responsible.The second is that he likes to eat, but Mr. Zhang Taiyan's cook is too poor, so he asked the old man to go crazy immediately, and if he doesn't change to a Sichuan cook, this madness will not be cured.

In desperation, the martial law headquarters had to change the cook for Mr. Taiyan.

But the cook who was replaced was enraged, so he secretly played tricks and drove Huang Kan away.This incident triggered Mr. Taiyan's hunger strike again.

There are two lunatics Zhang Taiyan and Huang Kan lying in the capital. One can imagine how sad Yuan Shikai's life is.But there is an important characteristic of human nature, that is, unwillingness to learn lessons.Ordinarily, when Yuan Shikai met Zhang Taiyan and Huang Kan, he should know that these masters of Chinese studies should not be provoked.Regardless of men and women, regardless of age, if you encounter these masters of Chinese studies, your nerves will inevitably split and your mind will inevitably go out of order.However, Yuan Shikai's mind was filled with water, and he brought another master of Chinese studies of the same level, Wang Kaiyun, to Beijing.

13 His EQ is a bit off
Speaking of Wang Kaiyun, one cannot fail to mention one of the most mysterious and suspenseful incidents in the history of the late Qing Dynasty.

As early as the tenth year of Xianfeng, that is, in 1860 AD, when Hong Xiuquan launched the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom Movement, the mountains and rivers of the Qing Dynasty were broken and the wind and rain were precarious.In order to settle Hong Xiuquan, Emperor Xianfeng appointed Zeng Guofan as governor of Liangjiang and imperial envoy, stationed in Qimen, Anhui, as a backup.

In this year, Wang Kaiyun, who was still handsome at the time, came to Zeng Guofan sincerely and stayed in his barracks for three months.

So two weird records appeared in Zeng Guofan's diary.

The first record was recorded on July [-]: I had a long talk with Wang Renqiu in the evening, and I couldn't sleep at night.

The second record was recorded on the fourth day of August: Wang Renqiu came, had a long talk with him, and was very tired at night.

In Zeng Guofan's diary, the Wang Renqiu mentioned was Wang Kaiyun who was 22 years younger than Zeng Guofan.Before that, countless historians squatted in this position, clutching their hair and bare feet, not thinking about food and tea, thinking hard about it: this Wang Kaiyun, what did he say to Zeng Guofan, and he talked about Zeng Guofan all night Insomnia?

But this question cannot be solved by historians alone.This question must be solved by... miscellaneous experts, because the answer is not in Zeng Guofan's diary, and Wang Kaiyun also secretly destroyed all written materials.To find out, you have to go somewhere else, a place you didn't expect.

Where is it?

The moaning place where poets get together.

If you happen to be a poet, or have a bad habit of reading ancient poems, then sooner or later you will read such a strange poem called "Song of Hunan Youth", and the song says:

……

There is even Mr. Wang from Xiangtan, who learned fencing as a young man.

Lobby the princes to form a separatist regime, and the southeast belt armor is Lianheng.

Zeng Hu wanted to thank Gu Xian, but Mr. laughed and put on his clothes.

……

This poem was written by Yang Du, the number one eccentric in the Republic of China and a disciple of Wang Kaiyun.In the poem, Yang Du indulged in praising the extraordinary learning of his teacher Wang Kaiyun, and pointed out that Wang Kaiyun used vertical and horizontal techniques to lobby Zeng Guofan.

What is called a vertical and horizontal technique?
The vertical and horizontal technique has been said for a long time.As early as the Warring States Period, there were ten schools of thought, among which the top ten schools of thought were on the list.The vertical and horizontal technique, expressed in today's language, is planning, which is called flickering at worst.But flickering also has to have the capital of flickering.During the Warring States period, Su Qin, a great political strategist, was empty-handed. With just one mouth, he made all the countries nod and handed over all the seals. Therefore, Su Qin, as a commoner, wore the seals of the six countries and became a legend in Chinese history. , And let countless nerds sit in the room in a daze, alas, if everyone is so easy to be fooled, it would be great.

There is a story in an ancient book, it is said that a person from the vertical and horizontal circles went out to fool people, but instead of succeeding in fooling people, he was beaten half to death and sent back home.When others were sympathizing with him, this old man stuck out his tongue and asked people: Is my tongue there?The other party replied: still there.The strategist laughed loudly: As long as the tongue is still there, if the tongue is here, you don't have to worry about fooling them.

Therefore, all ancient strategists must have extraordinary EQ, coupled with extraordinary IQ, coupled with extraordinary thinking and knowledge, even if one of these things is missing.Just imagine, you are empty-handed, talking nonsense to others, and immediately ask someone to give you his money. In the process, EQ, IQ, thinking and knowledge, even if there is less, people will not buy it.

In this way, since Wang Kaiyun specializes in vertical and horizontal techniques, his emotional intelligence should be super high?

This... seems to be the exact opposite.

In fact, Wang Kaiyun's EQ is not suitable to be expressed by the concept of high or low.His EQ has to be measured either narrowly or broadly.That is to say, Wang Kaiyun's personal emotional intelligence is not on the same track as the public's perception, and it's not right to say that it deviates.

Wang Kai, a political strategist, came to Beijing with his old lady, Mother Zhou.

The Bad People of the History Museum of 14 Countries
But Wang Kaiyun, after lobbying Zeng Guofan to no avail, suddenly became discouraged and said: "With a useful body, I have been involved in endless realms, and I have worked hard to serve things, which is ridiculed by the masters; I am boasting, which is really absurd!"So Wang Kaiyun, who was in the prime of his life, retired to seclusion as soon as he thought of Bodhi.

This concealment lasted for nearly 60 years. At this time, Wang Kaiyun's pursuit of knowledge has been getting deeper and deeper.With knowledge, what do you do?Wang Kaiyun thought, why not give the old lady Zhou Ma who was serving tea and water to that... So Wang Kaiyun rushed forward, and without any explanation, pushed down Zhou Ma who was serving tea and pouring water. The good stories about my heart spread so depressingly.

Being an old lady, Wang Kaiyun had a great sense of accomplishment, so he spread the word everywhere, for fear that others would not know.From then on, no matter where he goes, Mother Zhou must take him with him.Others felt awkward, so Wang Kaiyun explained: This Zhou Mama is my cotton-padded quilt, how can there be a reason to leave the body?
This time in Beijing, Zhou's mother is naturally inseparable.Along the way, local military and political officials greeted them, and invited the great Confucian Wang Kaiyun to the table. Wang Kaiyun came with Zhou Ma. The two sat next to each other at the wine table. The military and political officials on the opposite side couldn't laugh or cry.

In this way, I swaggered all the way and finally came to Beijing.Yuan Shikai sent a car to take Wang Kaiyun to the Presidential Palace for an interview.When entering the Xinhua Gate, Wang Kaiyun pointed to the word "Xinhua Gate" and asked in a voice: "Is Shumo the Xinmang Gate?"

Mang, Wang Mang's mang.What Wang Kaiyun meant was, Yuan Shikai, you want to be emperor like Wang Mang, right?
Then Wang Kaiyun drew up a couplet for the presidential palace.

The first couplet is: the people are still the same, and the country is still the same.

The second line is: in a word, in a nutshell.

Horizontal batch: Bystanders are clear.

This couplet means that Yuan Shikai, the president of the Republic of China, is not a thing.

No, no, no one can do anything about it.So after Wang Kaiyun chatted with Yuan Shikai, he became the head of the embassy of the Republic of China.The National History Museum opened, and everyone discussed writing the history of the Republic of China.Wang Kaiyun felt awkward listening, so he put his arms around the cotton-padded shoes and quilt Zhou Ma, and asked: The Republic of China has only been established for two years, so there is a fart history to write?

However, if you don't write history, what are you doing in the National History Museum?

Therefore, the researchers of the National History Museum held a meeting to discuss this matter. There is no history to write, so what should everyone do?In the end, it was Wang Kaiyun's best disciple, Song Yuren, editor of the National History Museum, who researched this issue.He said: This is wrong. We are writing history, but the Republic of China is too short to write about. If we want to write, we can only write about the former Qing Dynasty, but the Qing Dynasty has perished, unless we immediately restore the imperial system and return to the Qing Dynasty. , let the Aixinjueluo family come out to be the emperor again, then we will have history to write.Dear teachers, do you think my research idea is correct?
Right, right, so right.The researchers of the National History Museum woke up like a dream: It really is the way of thinking that determines the way out. Hurry up, don't delay, and write a letter to the government immediately, demanding that the government be returned to the Qing Dynasty and the monarchy be restored.

After the open letter was written, everyone signed it one after another. Wang Kaiyun's signature was on the front, and the following was the proud disciple Song Yuren.Unexpectedly, when this letter was handed in, it immediately caused an uproar among the people.It is generally believed that the old pedants of the National History Museum have lost their minds, how much blood they shed, how many people died, and finally overthrew the imperial system. The National History Museum is so good that they actually want to restore it.

The group discussed fiercely and demanded severe punishment for those rotten people from the National History Museum.

After investigation, it was found that the editor Song Yuren's brain was flooded and fiddled with this matter.So a department submitted the punishment plan to Yuan Shikai for approval. The plan said: ... (Song Yuren)'s remarks are absurd and his mind is in disorder. He should be sent back to his original place and handed over to the local officials for inspection.

Yuan Shikai changed "should be sent back to his original place" to "persuaded to return to his original place for recuperation", and sent three thousand oceans to Song Yuren.So Song Yuren rode out of Beijing in a carriage in a majestic manner.Before reaching Hankou, Duan Zhigui, a Beiyang general, sent eight sedan chairs to carry Song Yuren back to his residence.

15 cotton shoes big quilt old lady

Although Song Yuren messed things up, he turned out to be very famous and stole the limelight, which made his teacher Wang Kaiyun envious and jealous.

As the so-called celebrity is romantic, when it comes to Wang Kaiyun, the reason why he publicizes the cotton shoes so much that Zhou's mother is so popular is that his purpose is really simple, just to make some topics come out and make himself show off.In today's words, it is called topic marketing, vicious hype.In those days, there were too many capable people, and without adding some malicious hype materials, no matter how powerful they were, it would be difficult to become the focus of the news.

So Song Yuren became famous in the first battle, and his fame spread to the world, which made Wang Kaiyun feel very comforted, thinking that after all, he is his disciple, who has a way and a skill.Then Wang Kaiyun fell into a state of depression and depression. The students had already shown enough limelight. When it was his turn as a teacher, did he need more creativity?

Yes, Wang Kaiyun had a flash of inspiration in his mind, and he came up with a trick, so he wrote a resignation letter and published it publicly. Then he hugged Zhou Ma, brushed his clothes, and walked back.

Sure enough, after Wang Kaiyun's resignation was published, there was an uproar all over the world, and the people rushed to tell each other. When they talked about it, their faces were full of horror, and then they burst into laughter.

So how did Wang Kaiyun write his resignation?Why did it cause such a sensational effect?

...It is proposed that the curtain book is not repaired, that women are involved in politics, that it will not benefit the history museum, and that they have tarnished the official motto.

Wang Kaiyun's words mean: I can't take it anymore, I really can't take it anymore, you know that my cotton shoes were ravaged by Zhou Mama, right?Have you heard of her?That woman is really not easy to mess with, it's too shameful.Since I became the curator of the National History Museum, she has been the director of human resources of the National History Museum.All the fellow villagers she knew, no matter what kind of illiterate and mentally retarded, counted as one, she arranged to be a researcher at the National History Museum.If I don't agree, she won't treat me as my cotton-padded shoes. She won't let me wear them or let me cover them up. If I don't let me wear them, I can't cover them. If this doesn't work, I have to wear them.But if you overwhelm her, she will mess with you.Now I am really worried about whether to cover or not, family affairs and state affairs, a dilemma.So I thought, why don't I just resign, and if I resign, can Mama Zhou arrange for illiterates in the National History Museum?I guess it's unlikely...

All in all, in the history of human resignation, Wang Kaiyun's resignation letter finally reached a peak, completely stealing the limelight from the old Mr. Zhang Taiyan who was under house arrest in Beijing, so that Zhang Taiyan had to put aside his own affairs to pursue Wang Kaiyun. As a super fan, he stated:

Xiangqi presents this appearance, laughing and scolding on the surface, but intrigues on the inside.Unexpectedly, the [-]-year-old man is so cunning.Like Zhou's mother, it is also the amulet of Zhenxiangqi old man.

Zhou Ma, a kind and simple working woman, entered history in this way.

All these bizarre things were piled up on Yuan Shikai's desk.At that time, Yuan Shikai shook his head again and again, saying: What is this? There is no way to do it. What about a constitutional monarchy?

Under the spoof of Zhang Taiyan and Wang Kaiyun, two evil figures, the imperial train had to brake suddenly.

(End of this chapter)