leave this sad place

Chapter 180 Bitterness
The next morning Ouyang woke up early, but he lay in bed and didn't want to get up. He still didn't know whether he should go to school today.

Although it was a very simple thing in itself, if there was no need, he really didn't want to go to that place again.But what if what she said is true?Thoughts became a little confused again.

I looked at the time, it was already 08:30, but I didn't see her busy figure.Maybe she waited to make her own decision too?With a faint sigh, he got up and opened the window, and a loud noise rushed towards him.

Some looked at an elementary school not far away with complicated expressions. Seven or eight-year-old children were chasing and running carefree, laughing like silver bells all over the ground, and their immature faces were full of innocence. laugh.His eyes became a little dazed. In fact, he didn't know whether he really hated that place in his heart, or he was just tired.

Even if I don't like the life I have been used to for more than ten years, I will still feel a little melancholy once I leave.

It has been two or three days since the official start of school, how is everything in the school?He couldn't help asking himself, but he clearly knew in his heart that everything in the school must be business as usual, but he felt as if he had been away for a long time.

The familiar broadcast came slowly, as if nothing had changed at all, but it felt a little far away inexplicably.In his mind, the scenes of running exercises together before, the lively and vigorous scenes, and the loud and passionate horns reappeared involuntarily.His vision gradually became a little blurred, looking north, he couldn't see anything in the white sky.

For a moment or several minutes, the familiar slogans in his mind sounded one after another, and he seemed to hear the vibration of his feet on the ground. He knew that they were running and practicing.

His heart became inexplicably disturbed, a trace of uneasiness, a trace of unspeakable eagerness lingered in his heart, and he kept pacing.Once, once, as if stepping on your own heart.The pace became faster and faster, but it became more and more messy.

He knows, he understands why he is like this now, but he still doesn't want to admit it.

A little lonely, I closed my eyes bitterly, recalling the emotion in my heart that has not really passed away for a long time, what is it?He didn't want to say it anymore.

"Now I can only stay here—" he murmured in a low voice, and there was a faint light of longing in his eyes.

Those former classmates, those familiar faces, they are still moving towards their goals day after day in that place.He didn't know if he really envied those simple, clear ideals and perseverance.

"Everyone has his own way to go, what about his own?" He asked himself, his eyes became more confused.

"Are you really like this?" He thought that if he went out to work elsewhere, wouldn't his education be just a junior high school level!It's ridiculous that I used to be so arrogant, but in the end it's just that!
He didn't know what else to do, he only knew that there was no possibility for him to study properly when he was staying at home.Do you want to continue?Do you really want to continue like this?Then, what is it for?

To get that high school diploma?When did I become so humble!So what else?Is it just for a walk?To draw an end to the cold window of more than ten years?Is it really just like this?Thinking about it, Ouyang's vision became more and more blurred.

"But good-not-willing-heart!" He gently stroked his chest with his right hand, and then held it tightly, a burst of inexplicable tingling suddenly gushed out, in the place closest to the soul - the heart superior!
Yes, how can the cold window of more than ten years be wasted like this?How can the glory of the past be forgotten and lost?How much bitterness and tears, how much wind and snow have passed, why choose to give up when this is approaching dawn?Can he live with peace of mind?
An inexplicable light flashed in his eyes, this time he knew clearly that he could no longer just carelessly, because time was running out!

I checked the time again, it was almost nine o'clock.

He changed his shoes and hurried towards the school, the door opened silently, she glanced at his disappearing back, after all, his face didn't seem to have changed at all, but there was a strange gleam in his eyes Pass.

Looking at the familiar streets and alleys in front of him gave him an inexplicable urge to cry.His pace was getting faster and faster, and his heart was getting more and more flustered, and he subconsciously looked at the time, it was already [-]:[-].Gritting her teeth, she couldn't care about so much anymore, and ran quickly towards the school.

He bent over and gasped heavily, but his eyes were fixed on the front - the door of the office, and he took a deep breath to calm his breathing.Ouyang looked into the office, but he didn't see the head teacher.

"How could it be? I must have not looked carefully." He comforted himself in his heart, looking for it over and over again.

No!No!Still haven't seen it!

His heart is full of frustration, why is this happening?Why can't I find it?He checked the time again, it was already ten past nine.

"Is it because I'm a few minutes late? It's only a few minutes, and he doesn't have the patience to wait for me?" His eyes looked at the sky with a bit of apathy. I don't like this feeling.

The rapid bell rang, his body trembled slightly, and his dull eyes regained some of their brilliance.Only then did he realize that he had just searched the office, and hadn't gone to the classroom to see Nan, maybe he was there!

He hurriedly ran to the door of the class taught by the head teacher, looking for one after another, telling himself again and again that he was inside, don't be discouraged, don't be depressed, don't give up!

But in the end he had to accept the reality - the head teacher was not at school at all!
Full of loneliness, he really couldn't figure out why this happened?Is it really because I was a few minutes late?Even if he was a few minutes late, it was impossible not to miss him!

Or——all of this is simply something created out of nothing!Then how should I feel?

He didn't know which one he should choose to believe, and which choice would not make him feel depressed?
The noise of carriages and horses passed by, and he walked on the street in a daze. He didn't care about the strange eyes of those passers-by.Now he just feels like a ghost, lost in the endless twilight.

"Maybe I'm just thinking wildly again." He comforted himself, feeling tired again.

Always hit yourself when you are determined to do something.He didn't know if this was fate, or God's joke?He looked at the sky, his heart full of bitterness.

(End of this chapter)