There are ways to speak and speak skills

Chapter 27 How to Control the Size of Things → The Law of Square and Circle (2)
This is a typical self-protection technique, and the so-called "it is ominous for those who see deep fish" is also true.Therefore, sometimes "the matter has nothing to do with oneself and hangs high", it also has its own rationality.Especially as a leader with a certain status, if he adopts a dangerous inspection technique on his subordinates, he must be scrutinized.

Once, Emperor Taizong of the Tang Dynasty secretly asked his confidants to take the treasury silk to try bribery in order to check whether there were corrupt officials among his civil servants.An official in charge of the palace gate didn't know, so he took a horse, and was immediately arrested by Emperor Taizong and said that he would be executed.So Pei Ju said to Emperor Taizong that this method of investigation was unrighteous and it was trapping people in the law.Obviously you asked someone to give it to him, but on the other hand, you said that he accepted bribes. Isn't this a scheme to harm people?If things go on like this, who will dare to be an official in court in the future?After hearing this, Emperor Taizong felt speechless, so he summoned civil and military officials to announce his fault to appease people's hearts.

That's why the ancients said: those who perceive light through insight often produce darkness because of light, which is the side effect of being good at observing people. A gentleman must be shrewd on the inside and honest on the outside, so that the ugly can be flattened, and the virtuous and the foolish can benefit from it, and this is a natural virtue." This can also be said to be the "active learning and application" of the ancients in dialectics.The so-called "great wisdom is like a fool" can be viewed in this way.

Psychological tips:

It is a very high cultivation for people to be stupid in small things and bright in big things.The so-called is not self-deception, or self-anesthesia, but intentional confusion.When you should be confused, don't worry about your own face, your knowledge, your status, and your power, you must be confused; when you should be smart and sober, you must be smart.If you turn from being smart to being stupid, and from being stupid to being smart, you will have both ways, and you will not be disturbed by troubles or burdened by human affairs. In this way, you will have a happy, joyful, and successful life.

Confused life, restrained wisdom, make people think you are insignificant and ignore your existence, but at the critical moment, calmly and preemptively, so that the other party does not know what is in the cloud, this is what a master of affairs does.

One should not care about everything in one's life, be confused when one should be confused, and be smart when one should be smart.There is an idiom "Lu Duan is not confused about big things", which means that he pretends to be confused about small things and does not play smart, but at critical moments, he shows great wisdom and great strategy.

Take advantage of the situation to actively build momentum
The method of "making the best use of the situation" means that in some critical events, if you want to agree or oppose a certain point of view, you should always pay attention to the emotions of the people around you, and try to mobilize the emotions of the people to support your point of view.Unknowingly, the opponent feels mental pressure, making him unable to fight back.Specifically, let's look at the following example.

When he was working as a lawyer in Lincoln, he once learned that his friend's son, Armstrong Jr., had been accused of murder and had been initially convicted.As the defendant's lawyer, he went to the court to check all the case files.The key to knowing the whole case lies in a witness for the plaintiff, Fulson, because he swore that on October 10, under the moonlight, he clearly witnessed Armstrong Jr. shooting the deceased.In response, Lincoln requested a review.

In this wonderful re-examination, there is the following dialogue:
Lincoln asked the witness: You swear that you saw Armstrong clearly?
Fulson: Yes.

Lincoln: You are behind the haystack, and little Armstrong is under the big tree. The distance between the two places is 30 meters. Can you recognize it?
Folsom: I can see it clearly because the moonlight is very bright.

Lincoln: Surely you didn't see him clearly from his clothes?
Fulson: No, I must have seen his face because the moonlight illuminated his face.

Lincoln: Are you sure it's eleven o'clock?

Fulson: Pretty sure, because I went back to the house and looked at the clock, and it was 11:15.

Lincoln asked here.Just turn around.delivered an amazing talk:

"I can't help but tell everyone. This witness is a total liar. He insisted that he saw the defendant's face clearly in the moonlight at 10:18 p.m. on October 11. Please think about it. At 10:18, the moon has already set, so where is the moonlight? Taking a step back, maybe he didn’t remember the time carefully enough, and the time was a little earlier. But at that time, the moonlight was shining from west to east, the haystacks were in the east, and the big trees were in the west. If the defendant's face was facing the haystack, there would be no moonlight on his face."

After listening to Lincoln's reasonable statement, the audience was silent for a while, followed by applause and shouts.Fulson was dumbfounded.

George Bernard Shaw's play "Arms and Men" was a huge success for the first time.At the end of the play, many audiences asked George Bernard Shaw to step onto the stage to accept the audience's congratulations. When George Bernard Shaw stepped onto the stage and was about to greet the audience, someone suddenly shouted at him: "George Bernard Shaw, your script sucks." No, who wants to see it! Take it back, stop the show!"

The audience was taken aback, expecting Bernard Shaw to answer the man's provocation with loud protests, trembling with rage.Who knew that Bernard Shaw was not angry, but bowed deeply to that person with a smile on his face, and said politely: "My friend, you are well said, and I completely agree with your opinion." Pointing to other audience members in the arena, he said, "But it's a pity, what's the use of the two of us opposing so many audience members? Can we ban this script from being performed?" These two sentences caused loud laughter from the audience. Immediately afterwards, there was a storm of warm applause.Amid the applause, the deliberately provocative person walked out of the theater despondently.

Psychological tips:

Asking about the situation at the time and explaining the truth to guide them is the common sense of doing things. Lincoln took every step to create a situation that is conducive to his own proof, and finally came to the fact that Fulson was committing perjury.Therefore, using the method of making the best use of the situation can sometimes simplify complex issues and provide convenience for communication between people.

In the second case, Bernard Shaw fully demonstrated his adaptability, borrowed the strength of the audience, and supported himself with the help of the audience's echo, applause, and applause, and strongly refuted the Man's deliberate provocation leads him to the opposite of the masses, thus making him untenable.

Using the tactics of making the most of the situation is to take the initiative to build momentum, so as to create a situation that is conducive to persuading the other party, and make the other party enter the thinking mode set by oneself.

Forbearance in small things, shrewd in big things
Confucius said: "If you can't bear it small, you can make big plans." If you want to do big things, you must look at the overall situation, and you can't get entangled in small things, and you can't get rid of them.

Duke Huan of Qi, one of the Five Overlords in the Spring and Autumn Period, boldly used such a person who had "enemies" against him but could indeed assist him-Guan Zhong.It was during the Spring and Autumn Period and the Warring States Period that Duke Huan of Qi was the first to dominate, and Duke Huan of Qi relied on his adviser Guan Zhong to dominate.

Duke Huan's name is Xiaobai, and he was originally the son of the state of Qi.Guan Zhong was originally the teacher of Xiaobai's brother, Prince Jiu.After the death of Duke Xi, the monarch of Qi, the princes competed with each other for the throne, and finally the prince Xiaobai was left to fight with the prince.In order to fight for the throne for his son, Guan Zhong shot his son Xiaobai with an arrow.The result of the struggle was that Xiaobai returned to Qi State to inherit the throne, that is, Duke Huan of Qi.The state of Lu, which helped the son fight for the throne, was defeated in the war with the state of Qi and had to seek peace.Duke Huan demanded that the state of Lu execute Jiu and hand over Guan Zhong.

After the news came out, everyone sympathized with Guan Zhong, because being sent to the enemy would undoubtedly be tortured to death.Someone suggested: "Guan Zhong! Instead of being sent to the enemy with the cheek, it is better to commit suicide first." But Guan Zhong just laughed it off.He said: "If you want to kill me, you should be killed together with the lord. If you still look for me now, you won't kill me." In this way, Guan Zhong was escorted back to Qi State.

Unexpectedly, Duke Huan immediately appointed Guan Zhong as prime minister, which even Guan Zhong himself did not expect.

Qi State ruled the area around the Shandong Peninsula. From the point of view of China as a whole, it was just a small country in the east.How to make this small country ascend to the position of the world's hegemony, this is the problem that Guan Zhong thinks about day and night.

He was determined to rectify the "legal system" first, and pursue a centralized policy of strengthening the country and enriching the people.Human nature is to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages, so it is necessary to implement politics based on the law and with clear rewards and punishments to achieve strict rule of the monarch and the people.And enriching the people's livelihood and winning people's hearts is the way to become a wise king.In addition, it is also necessary to devote ourselves to the work of spreading the reputation far and wide.These ideologies are not small country ideology, but also the ruling ideology to dominate the world.

The state of Qi and the state of Lu are adjacent to each other. Due to the continuous borders, armed conflicts continue.In the fifth year of Duke Huan of Qi, Qi State defeated Lu State, and Lu State had to cede a piece of land to seek peace.King Lu and his general Cao Mo went to Qi to negotiate peace.During the discussion, Cao Mo suddenly stood up and raised his dagger to Duke Huan of Qi's chest. He looked at Duke Huan with a fatal gaze and said, "Our country of Lu is a small country. Now due to the king's aggression, the land is getting smaller and smaller. Anyway, please come together." The king returned the land he had taken."

"I promise." Duke Huan had to obey.

"Then, let's make a covenant to return the land here!"

Since the dagger was on Duke Huan's chest, no one dared to intervene, so an agreement was signed to return the land.

Duke Huan returned the land in order to save his life, but he didn't really want to return it. So after King Lu left, he immediately said to the officials: "The covenant will be written separately, and the occupied land will never be given up. The original covenant is invalid." At this time, Guan Zhong advised Duke Huan said: "I understand the feelings of the lord, but if you do that, you will lose the big. If you easily break the established laws and lose the trust of the princes, you will lose the most important backing in the world. Don't be obsessed with such a small land."

Duke Huan immediately calmed down, accepted Guan Zhong's suggestion, and withdrew his troops and returned.This incident soon spread to the ears of the neighboring princes. Everyone praised King Qi's decisiveness and awe of Duke Huan's bravery. Qi's reputation was greatly improved.

Yan State in the north of Qi State was attacked by a foreign nation—Shanrong, so it asked for help from Qi State.Duke Huan of Qi sent troops to conquer Shan Rong, and the King of Yan personally sent Duke Huan back to the territory of Qi to thank him.This was a violation of etiquette at the time, because the cross-border farewell was limited to treating the son.Duke Huan dug a gap between himself and the king of Yan, and gave the state of Yan all the lands that the king of Yan visited.

Duke Huan donated a part of the territory to the King of Yan, but he received great benefits from a small favor. When the princes heard that Duke Huan had done it, they all submitted to Qi State, and Duke Huan of Qi became hegemony.

"A plan for one year is like planting grain. A plan for ten years is like planting trees. A plan for a lifetime is like planting people."

"One point of sowing and one point of harvest is for grain, one point of hard work and ten points of harvest is for power, and one point of hard work for one hundred percent of reaping is talent."

This is a section in the book "Guan Zi" left by Guan Zhong to later generations.

Duke Huan reigned for 43 years, and Guan Zhong died two years after Duke Huan's death. During this period, Guan Zhong had always shouldered important responsibilities.

"You don't have to take any responsibility, but you realize your ideals through me. You can realize your ideals without worrying about your life. But you should have no regrets if you can do something for the world." Guan Zhong said to his best friend when he was dying Bao Shuya said.

"I thank you for everything you have done, because you made me realize my ideal without worrying about my life!" Bao Shuya replied.

Therefore, it must be known that gold is never pure, and no one is perfect. What we need to use is a person's ability, not his fault, so why do we always focus on that fault?Forbearance means not to get entangled in small details and small problems, treat others with forgiveness, and use people's strengths.

"Hundred Proverbs of Persuading Forbearance" holds that: people who take the overall situation into consideration, don't stick to small details; people who want to do big things, don't pursue small things; People don't feel unhappy because of the moths on them.If you throw away the jade jade because of a little flaw, you will never get a perfect jade; if you throw away the wood because of a little moth corrosion, there will be no perfect good material in the world.

Psychological tips:

Bao Shuya didn't look down on Guan Zhong because he was greedy for petty wealth. He knew that he was a man of great ability, and Duke Huan of Qi also wanted to use people to govern the country, regardless of the small enmity he once shot himself.It was in this way that Guan Zhong gave full play to his talents, and Qi was also governed and became a powerful country.

If you just blindly consider this person's minor flaws, then how can there be a perfect person in this world?Employing people is to use their great talents, not to dwell on small mistakes, otherwise there will be no truly capable people in the world.

When dealing with things, if you blindly emphasize the minutiae and make generalizations, you will miss the key issues to do the work. There is no focus, the clues are messy, and you don’t know where to start is the right thing to do.Therefore, no matter whether you are employing people or doing things, you should pay attention to the mainstream, and don't hinder the development of your career because of a small matter.

Funny and humorous
French writer Alain said when discussing how to use the wisdom of happiness to fight against troubles in various ways: troubles are a kind of spiritual myopia we suffer from. We should look far away and maintain a positive and optimistic attitude, so that we Your footsteps will be firmer, and your heart will be more calm.

John Rockefeller is a famous rich man in the world, but he is very economical in daily expenses.One day, he went to a hotel in New York and asked to rent one of the cheapest rooms.

The manager of the hotel said, "Why did you choose such a small and cheap room? When your son comes to stay, he always chooses the most expensive room."

"Yes," said Rockefeller, "my son's father was a millionaire and mine was not."

(End of this chapter)