There are ways to speak and speak skills

Chapter 7 Talking to Subordinates → Expectation Strategies (2)
On one occasion, she discovered that a manager was using a compact and lip balm from another company.She took the opportunity to walk to the manager's desk and said with a smile, "God, what are you doing? You don't use other company's products in the company, do you?" Her tone was very relaxed, with a smile on her face.The manager's face flushed slightly.A few days later, Mary Kay gave the manager a set of the company's lipstick and eyeshadow and said to her: "If you feel any discomfort during use, you are welcome to tell me in time. Thank you in advance." Later, all the new and old employees of the company have a complete set of cosmetics and skin care products produced by the company that are suitable for them.Ms. Mary Kay personally made a detailed demonstration.She also told employees that in the future, employees can get discounts when they buy company cosmetics.

Mary Kay's friendly attitude and friendly oral expression made her blend with the employees naturally and successfully instilled her correct business philosophy.

Psychological tips:

The above story further shows us the practical significance of affinity, and also tells us that affinity is not flattery and flattery, but a kind of equality and reciprocity between hearts.Facts have proved that in an enterprise with fine division of labor, if the boss and subordinates unite as one and cooperate tacitly, they will often get twice the result with half the effort. To do this, you must first be friendly to your subordinates.Only in this way can you win the trust of your subordinates.

So how to cooperate with more stubborn partners at work so that such people can act according to their own intentions?The best way to do this is to use the word "we" when speaking so that they feel that they have something in common.Because all such subordinates are very sensitive to their superiors and their sense of belonging is relatively weak, so "we" should be used skillfully in order to remove the subordinate's psychological defense line, and then make them consistent with the superior's attitude.

Lower your posture to get closer

If the boss wants to establish an image and reputation in front of his subordinates, he must keep his word when he speaks, set an example, treat others fairly, and be approachable.Only in this way, subordinates will obey the leadership, cooperate with the work, and actively make suggestions.

A leader who shows off his power is tantamount to selling his ignorance; a leader who shows off his wealth is tantamount to selling his personality.People who put on airs not only can't do well with the leadership, but also can't do well with the masses.

The following example may inspire you to deal with the relationship between superiors and subordinates:

There is a president of the United States who opened the White House to "talk" with more than 100 children when celebrating his re-election.

10-year-old John asked the president which subject was the worst when he was a child, and whether he was also criticized by the teacher.The president told him: "My moral class is not very good, because I love to talk and often interfere with other people's learning. Of course the teacher must often criticize."

His answer made the atmosphere very lively.

Then there was a girl named Mary who came from a poor neighborhood in Chicago.She told the president that she was terrified going to school every day because she didn't know what was going to happen and was afraid of meeting bad people on the road.

At this time, the president put away his smile and said solemnly: "I know that the life of the children is not very satisfactory now, because the government has not handled the problems related to drugs, guns and kidnapping satisfactorily-I hope you will study hard and have the opportunity in the future Participate in the just cause of the country. Only when we unite to fight against the bad guys can our lives be better."

Psychological tips:

The president in the above story's research on the psychology of the interviewee and the low profile he adopts are worth learning in our life and work.

The president's words firmly grasped the children's hearts, making the children think that the president and them are good friends from the bottom of their hearts.Even adults outside the court will feel that the president is a kind person when they see such a dialogue scene.From a psychological point of view, what the president showed is not only friendly speech and actions, but also the trait of "empathy" in interpersonal relationships.He used this trait to reveal to the children that his past was just like them, and he was often criticized by the teacher, but as long as he worked hard, he would grow into a useful person.When the President agrees that children are worried about social security, he also encourages children to participate in the cause of justice, so that the power of the righteous will be greater.Such conversations made the children discover that the president lives in the same country as them and thinks about issues from the same standpoint.

When talking with subordinates as a leader, it is very popular to show affinity or adopt an appropriate low profile to meet the self-esteem psychological needs of subordinates.A good leader can only get the support of his subordinates and do a better job if he gets along well with his subordinates.Not putting on airs means not being superior. This is an art of leadership. It can bring the leader and the led closer to each other, and make the subordinates feel that the leader is approachable, so they respect the leader more.

win over people's hearts and take responsibility
The most worrying thing for a subordinate is to do something wrong, especially if you still get into a catastrophe after spending a lot of effort, because there will be problems of punishment and responsibility; but life is a series of events. No matter how careful and clever people are, there will be times when the gutter capsizes.But if you overturn your own small boat, it’s all right, but once you accidentally leak the big boat where many people make a living together, it is really possible to end up "walking around without eating".Therefore, there is no one who is not afraid of taking responsibility.

On January 1977, 1, President Jimmy Carter unexpectedly walked back to his home in the White House after being sworn in and delivering a speech.In a city where safety is always on the line, the sight of the new president roaming freely down Pennsylvania Avenue, accompanied by his wife, Rosalynn, and daughter, Amy, was remarkable.The president's walk added to the drama of his inaugural address.By walking the streets, Carter was determined to restore a sense of trust to the American people.

Carter achieved a series of domestic and diplomatic achievements during his term of office, but he suffered a disastrous failure when he rashly ordered the special forces to launch "Operation Blue Light" to rescue American hostages in Iran, which caused his popularity among voters to plummet.But then, the incumbent President of the United States, Carter, immediately made a TV statement on the TV that "I am responsible for everything."

Prior to this, Americans did not think very highly of Carter.Some people even commented that he was "the worst president in history who entered the White House by mistake", but just because of the sentence "I am responsible for everything.", the number of people supporting Carter unexpectedly increased by more than 10%. He lost re-election to Reagan in 1980, but he never gave up his efforts to rescue the hostages. Iran finally released all the hostages on the day Carter left the White House.

Psychological tips:

The example of President Carter fully demonstrates that the evaluation of a superior by subordinates and the public often depends on whether he has a sense of responsibility.Just imagine that one day you accidentally ran into a catastrophe, and after reporting to your superiors like a frightened bird, you waited until the next day with anxiety, sitting in the venue like a "public trial conference" and "waiting to be dealt with", the superior was like President Carter. Under the watchful eyes of everyone, he said loudly: "I am responsible for everything!" What kind of state of mind should that be?

Therefore, a superior who knows how to win people's hearts, after a subordinate makes trouble, will first calmly review his words and deeds, then call the subordinate, analyze the whole incident calmly, tell the subordinate what is wrong, and finally reiterate the purpose of being a subordinate : That is to say, every subordinate should go all out in doing things, and he will be punished if he is careless and coping with errands.Of course, let your subordinates understand that no matter what, you will always be their backing.Only a superior who has the courage to take responsibility can convince his subordinates and admire him.

The kind of superiors who are indiscriminate, regardless of whether the subordinates' faults are related to themselves or not, are furious, and from time to time they emphasize words such as "I told you what to do" or "I can't control so much". In the face of the fact of inheritance, there is a dissatisfied mentality of resistance, which creates irreparable psychological contradictions and barriers between the upper and lower levels.Therefore, when subordinates make omissions in important matters, as a superior, you must have the courage to take responsibility. Only in this way can your subordinates appreciate you and face up to their mistakes.

Compassionate verbal teaser of subordinates

No matter who they are, they are willing to work and live in a team full of human touch.The injection of human touch is firstly the responsibility of the team leader, because whether the leader is empathetic, sympathetic and caring for his subordinates directly determines the concentration of the team's human atmosphere.For the new generation of employees, what they care most about is how others treat them.And behind the empathy, it is the most precious respect that the boss has for his subordinates.

Emperor Yongzheng was relatively open-minded on the issue of employing people. He took "talented talents" as his standard and never "only relatives".The merits and demerits of the courtiers are also clearly rewarded and punished, and they are considerate.

At the beginning of the founding of the Qing Dynasty, the princes and princes made great contributions, and Emperor Shunzhi rewarded them very generously. Those who flew down the Five Banners were all classified as servants of the palace.With the passing of peace, the princes and princes have not changed their arrogance and arrogance, and they are often very cruel and mean to their subordinates.

Yang Lin, governor of Guangdong and Guangxi, is a subject of King Dunjun.Once, I don't know what offended King Dunjun.King Dunjun immediately sent an eunuch to Guangzhou to search around Yang Lin's governor's mansion, which made the governor ashamed.

Yongzheng hated this kind of evil behavior very much.After he ascended the throne, he ordered the vassals not to have contact with foreign officials. Except for meeting with foreign officials every year, foreign officials were generally not allowed to pay homage to the princes' mansions privately;In this way, the princes no longer dare to disturb, and become law-abiding.

Although Yongzheng was so strict with the kings, he was very friendly to the ministers.Moreover, he has his own unique perspective when appointing ministers.

Yongzheng's reuse of E Wenduan is an example.When E Wenduan was the official of the Ministry of Internal Affairs, Yongzheng was still living in the mansion as a prince.Once, Yongzheng summoned Ewenduan for something, but Ewenduan refused, and said: "As a prince, you should pay attention to your own virtue. How can you communicate with foreign ministers?" Yongzheng was deeply touched by his words. , think what he said is very reasonable.Later, after Yongzheng ascended the throne, he immediately summoned E Wenduan.People who cared about E Wenduan were very worried about him, fearing that Yongzheng would give him little shoes to wear.Unexpectedly, after meeting Yongzheng, he told him: "In the past, you dared to refuse the prince's request with the humble position of a langguan. It is not unreasonable to abide by the law. If you are a minister, you must be loyal to the emperor. I will give you a Jiangsu envoy!" Ten A year later, E Wenduan was promoted to prime minister again, which shows that Yongzheng attached great importance to him.

Yongzheng knew that the salaries of the ministers were very meager and not enough to meet the expenses.Therefore, the item of "raising honesty and silver" was set up, and every festival, many rewards were given to the ministers.When Ewenduan was called in, Yongzheng specially ordered Haiwang Sikong to build a mansion for Ewenduan in the north of Dashi Street, and prepare all the utensils and utensils for him.

Zhang Wenhe once had a minor illness, and when he recovered, Yongzheng told the left and right: "My thigh and arm are uncomfortable, and it took several days to recover." As soon as they heard that the emperor had a minor illness, everyone rushed to greet him. Yongzheng laughed and pointed at Zhang Wenhe. Said: "Isn't this my thigh?"

Psychological tips:

It is not difficult to see from the above allusions that as a boss, you must know how to use warm words to melt the cold hearts of your subordinates.Just like Yongzheng treated E Wenduan, he should be cared for psychologically and materially, and be considerate.

An enlightened leader who wants his subordinates to truly work for him should think carefully about what his subordinates need most and what difficulties his subordinates need help with, and express his concern for his subordinates in words , In this way, subordinates can thank you from the heart and work for you.

(End of this chapter)