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Chapter 69: Know Your Enemy, Understand Yourself: Be an Intentional, Highly Skilled Communicator 2
Volume 5 Chapter 2 Know Your Enemy and Understand Yourself: Be a Highly Skilled Communicator with Heart [-]
The best way to impress others is sincerity
When you are in a bad mood, you need an empathetic and good listener most. If you can play this role at the right time, you will be surprised at how unreserved the other party is.But the premise is that you must be sincere and considerate of the other party, without selfishness.

-- "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People"

In front of the language full of sincerity, all sweet words will be eclipsed, obviously, the former can impress others better.

In 1915, Rockefeller Jr. was an obscure figure in Colorado.At that time, the most violent strike in the history of American industry occurred in the United States, and it lasted for two years.Angry miners demanded higher wages from the Colorado Fuel Steel Company, which Rockefeller Jr. was running.Due to the excitement, the company's property was destroyed, and the army came to suppress it, resulting in bloodshed, and many strikers were shot to death.

At that time, it could be described as "popular resentment", but Rockefeller Jr. later won the conviction of the strikers.How did he do it?
It turned out that after the bloody conflict, Rockefeller Jr. spent a long time making friends and delivering a heartfelt speech to the representatives of the strikers.That speech not only quelled the outrage, but also won him a lot of praise for himself.In his speech there is this passage:
"This is the most memorable day of my life because it was the first time I had the privilege of meeting the representatives of the employees of this large company, as well as the executives and managers of the company. I can tell you that I am very happy to stand on the Here, I will never forget this meeting as long as I live. If this meeting had been held two weeks earlier, I would be a stranger to you, and I would know only a few faces. Since last week, I have Opportunity to visit camps throughout the nearby South Zone mines, have spoken privately with most of the representatives, and I have visited and met your families, so that I am now not a stranger but a friend. Based on this I am very happy to have this opportunity to discuss our mutual interests with you. Since this meeting is composed of management and labor representatives, I am grateful to you for being able to sit here. Although I am not a shareholder or a laborer, I I feel deeply connected to you. In a sense, I also represent management and labor."

What touched people's hearts in these words was the sincerity of Rockefeller Jr. He did not evade his identity as a representative of the management, and at the same time formed a relationship similar to friends with the laborers through his sincere visits.Such a sincere discourse may be the best way to turn an enemy into a friend.If Rockefeller Jr. got into a fight with the miners, cursed them with vicious words, or used words to imply that the workers were at fault, and used various reasons to prove the miners' mistakes, the result would only lead to more resentment and atrocities.

In dealing with people, sincerity is very important. Whether it is to express apology, understanding, concern, encouragement or best wishes to the other party, as long as you have a sincere heart, it is easy to get the other party's understanding, or let the other party understand accurately. Soothe your mind, thereby enhancing the relationship between the two parties.

In addition, you should also pay attention to the skills of expression.Talking with people is like playing a piano. When the other party feels bored or disgusted, you must hold down the strings in time, or change a page of music.Mr. Covey believes that expressing oneself skillfully is also an important rule for seeking a win-win situation and achieving high performance.We should not only take the initiative to understand others, but also have the obligation to let others understand ourselves.When expressing sincerely and supplementing it with appropriate expression skills, it will achieve twice the result with half the effort.

(End of this chapter)