my old life

Chapter 761 Inner Abyss

I can understand some truths, and some things I can understand, but the sentence written by the dumb man made me fall into deep thought, and I felt flustered like never before!
"Longze, it's hard to imagine what you have experienced before." I sighed from the bottom of my heart, to be honest, I am more and more fascinated by him but also more and more vigilant!

A person who can see through my essence at a glance is definitely not a simple person!But it also represents his danger!

With such a powerful person around me as a helper, I really have no idea, I can't control it, I can't predict it, and I don't even have a handle in my hands... It's just a kind of rebirth, it may be nothing to me, but how much is it to him The meaning is only God knows...

The sentence that the dumb traded to me just now made me more convinced that my idea was correct... I am indeed not as good as him!He should take my place, he definitely has the strength to become the control of the gang!

Because what he said is better than second uncle!A thousand times more ruthless!But one sentence hit my inner weakness, and it hit the thing I didn't want to mention the last time.

"Who do you live for? Family affection is stronger than tigers, and one day you will be burdened by family affection..."

I think the mute should be able to see my current state of mind, and see through all my helplessness and choices. His eyes are like a sharp knife, piercing my heart instantly!

Just like most people are muddle-headed, working hard every day to live a life that remains the same. In fact, I have never thought about my own life... more like living for my second uncle.

I know that as long as I am in the rivers and lakes for a day, I will be in danger of being dragged down, but I have always been willing...

Because the second uncle has an irreplaceable love for me, and he has devoted all his efforts to me, but I seem to be living for the second uncle, even if I don’t want to apply the relationship between using and being used, but the reality is always so cold. ruthless!

Now, from my own point of view, is all this really what I want?Is all this really living for yourself?not...

His words are always plain but extremely sharp, like a sharp scalpel that can easily pierce people's hearts!
I think the mute wants to remind me after he sees it through, or it is an ordinary piece of advice, which is the advice he summed up in his life!It is the advice that he thinks can be worthy of Morse silent code!

A piece of nonsense that seems worthless to others, but it completely pierced my heart, making me have to think about who I live for and what I do everything for...

"I have to say that you are amazing, I admire it!" I took out a cigarette and handed it over, feeling as if I had knocked over a five-flavored bottle, it was extremely complicated!

He took the cigarette and didn't speak, but I can remember the look in his eyes. Except for the second uncle, no one has ever given me such advice before, let alone mentioned such a thing.

All my persistence and beliefs fell apart in an instant. This is the power of one sentence, and the power to face people's hearts directly!
I know that from this moment on I will live for myself, because I still have so many people worthy of love, so many unfinished things, and so many wonderful unknown worlds waiting for me to explore!

Find yourself and be self-centered, I think the second uncle would also like to see me like this, but he is destined not to give me such advice.

I remembered that on the operating table facing life and death, I encouraged myself time and time again, and told myself not to give up. At that time, I was the real self, and that was the real life for myself!

Everything turned into turbulent emotions, which instantly swallowed my heart. The simple sentence of being self-centered couldn't be simpler, but it completely broke me down at this moment!
I asked the mute to open a room to rest, lit a cigarette alone and quietly let the feelings swallow me up, fumbled for the Omega on my wrist, and fell into the endless abyss of thought willingly.

In this abyss, there are too many emotional entanglements, too much ruthlessness and coldness, and there is also a sense of innocence and kindness. I seem to see several different me...

Everyone in front of me is me, they all look exactly like me, but the expressions on their faces and eyes are different...

I know that each of them is a demon hidden in my heart. They argue with each other and try to occupy my body. They all want to control my consciousness and thinking. Greed and obsession are constantly causing trouble.

A voice told me: "I have done enough now, it's time to let go of my previous thoughts and vows, and start living for myself!"

Another voice told me: "The Jianghu world is cold and ruthless, you must be more ruthless than others, and always keep kindness to yourself!"

I calmly looked at the two myself in front of me. What they said was indeed reasonable, but there was another me with clear eyes beside me. I could see kindness and simplicity on this face.

"Xiong Sanming, don't forget your persistence and principles in your heart, and don't forget your love, hatred and friendship, which is the friendship of a lifetime."

I don't know when the cigarette in my hand has burned out, and in the abyss of my heart, I look at the several Xiong Sanming in front of me fighting together, each of them wants to control everything!Everyone wants to replace me!

This time I am not standing at the crossroads of life, but standing at the choice of who will be my own... This choice is really difficult, as long as you make a choice, you must let go.

The friendship and kindness in the past, the love and hatred and memories in the past, as well as the ruthlessness and kindness and innocence, all the qualities are forcing me to make a choice, like a multiple-choice question.

I saw the innocent and kind me who used to be, the cold and ruthless me, and the greedy and obsessive me... Finally, there was me hiding in a corner, bound by black chains and chains all over my body.

Seeing that he is already out of breath, I know that these shackles and iron chains represent friendship and vows, how to break free from this shackles and how to be self-centered?Everything is waiting for me to make my own choices.

Time passed slowly, standing in the depths of my heart, I wandered again and again, hesitation made me unable to make a choice, I knew in my heart that I couldn't get rid of this shackle, I could never be self-centered, but I could get rid of this shackle So ruthless again.

Everything about my second uncle flashed before my eyes. Without my second uncle, I would not be where I am today!The Morse silent code that the mute gave me appeared in front of my eyes. What he told me was correct, but this choice is really difficult...

When I was hesitating and unable to make a choice, I suddenly felt that someone was shooting me, and I suddenly woke up from my sleep!

Before he knew it, the sky was already bright, but it was a gray light, his whole body was drenched in cold sweat, and the big person in front of him was a soldier.

"Are you okay? You have been muttering all night, thinking you were talking in your sleep, maybe you are possessed by an evil spirit?" He reached out and touched my forehead, and I waved my hand to indicate that it was okay.

In fact, the words the mute gave me pierced into my heart like an evil Gu, making me struggle but it was difficult to make a choice.

"Seeing how weak you are, do you want to rest for two more days?" Da Bing looked at me worriedly, I knew I was fine.

"I'm fine, it's just a dream... What am I muttering about in my dream?" I took out a cigarette and lit it. A refreshing cigarette is essential every day.

"I muttered a lot in a mess, what ten 67, what second uncle's shackles, anyway, it's like chanting scriptures, and it hasn't stopped all night."

What Dabing said, I felt very emotional in my heart. I just fell into inner contemplation, but I didn't expect that I couldn't make a choice after struggling all night.

"It's okay, it's okay, let's get ready, let's go to Sioux City today, we can't live here for a day!" I know the strength of Changle Gate, and I know that time waits for no one, maybe the second uncle and the others have already left!
"Okay! Well...thank you, I received your money." Da Bing said coyly, it was rare for him to be so embarrassed.

"What are you talking about, we are brothers who have sworn oath to the lamp, so you should not take any less! In fact, I want to thank you."

Being able to accompany me from Shencheng to Shannan overnight, being able to accompany me to break into the dungeon, and being able to go to Changle Gate to pick me up, I will remember all the affection in my heart!

"As long as you can think highly of me, I will work with you! Men always want to create a world, and when I go back, I can brag to my comrades in arms!"

"Haha, no problem, it's just that I have a small request, and I don't know if I can agree to it." I changed the subject and had a plan in mind.

People don't kill for themselves, and now that the old thousand group has a powerful person like Dumb joining, I have to leave a way out for myself!

(End of this chapter)