Life is but a thought: Nan Huaijin's 15 Life Wisdom Lessons

Chapter 22
According to statistics, 40% of human troubles are for daily trivial matters, 20% are unfounded worries, 12% are fabricated in one's own heart, and do not exist at all; the remaining 18% are fait accompli facts, no matter how much you worry about troubles , will have no effect.

Around us, there are often people who express this emotion: "What makes me unhappy every day is often the little things that are bigger and bigger." We can avoid an elephant, but we cannot avoid a fly.On the road of life, we can avoid major crises, but we are often confused and miserable by some inexplicable trivial matters.Just like those ancient trees in the forest, even in the face of heavy wind and rain, they can stand upright, but they will inevitably be eaten away by small insects that can be crushed to death with an index finger.

Everyone will encounter many annoying things in life.For those who like to trouble themselves, worrying about small things has become a habit of their own, but a rational person will first ask himself when something happens: "Is what I'm worrying about worth? Is it worth it? What does it matter to me? When should I 'stop here' on this matter? What if I don't think about it?" Worrying about trivial things, wasting your time Time and energy, leading to depression, is indeed not worth the candle.

Dale Carnegie, a famous success tutor, often argued with others over some trivial matters when he was young.

One night, Carnegie attended a banquet.During the banquet, a gentleman sitting opposite him told a story and quoted a sentence. The talkative gentleman mentioned that the sentence he quoted came from the "Bible".Carnegie, however, knew he had made a mistake and remembered with certainty the source of that statement.The young and energetic Carnegie naturally would not let go of this opportunity to perform, so he corrected that mistake very seriously.Carnegie's words made the gentleman unable to step down for a moment. Anger appeared on the gentleman's face, and he immediately retorted: "What? From Shakespeare? Impossible! Absolutely impossible!"

Seeing that the gentleman did not believe him, Carnegie turned to his old friend Frank Garmond, who sat beside him and studied Shakespeare for many years.

Ge Meng kicked Carnegie under the table and said, "Dale, you are wrong, this gentleman is right. This sentence comes from the Bible." Seeing what his old friend said, Carnegie did not continue this topic.

After the banquet, Carnegie and Ge Meng went home together.On the way, Carnegie remembered the topic at the dinner table again, so he asked Ge Meng: "Frank, you know that sentence comes from Shakespeare." "Of course." Ge Meng replied, "in the fifth scene of "Hamlet" .We are all guests at the banquet. We just eat and chat together. He didn’t tell that story to ask for your opinion. Why do you have to prove him wrong and make him unable to step down? Even if you really made it , so what? Then he will like you more? What's more, is it worth fighting for such a small matter?"

"Is it worth it for such a small thing?" This is the question we should ask ourselves most.Because in our life, some very small and insignificant things often happen. If you often worry about these things, even if it is an unintentional look or a careless word from others, you will become very concerned. .It will be difficult for you to release yourself, and the irritability will be like a virus, occupying your heart all the time, driving away your happiness, and making you depressed every day.

In fact, many things that happen around us are not worth our attention.So as long as we can face the trivial matters in life with a peaceful mind, then we will enjoy the happiness and joy that we should have in life.Life is too short, stop worrying about the little things.Facing the troubles in life, we might as well wave our hands, smile, let it pass easily, and we will live happily and easily every day.

Jealousy of others is an injury to oneself

Jealousy of others is nothing more than fear that others are better than oneself, better than oneself.However, being afraid is useless. Jealousy can't make you better immediately, and it can't make good people worse.That being the case, why be jealous of others?
In "Huangdi Neijing Suwen", there is: "burning with jealousy can make people lose their minds, consume energy, lose energy, block kidney qi, stagnation and coagulation, invasion of external evils, insufficiency of essence and blood, kidney failure and loss of yang, Disease breeds."

Mr. Nan Huaijin clearly pointed out in "The Medicine Master's View of Helping the World": "The Buddha said that if all living beings go on the road of greed, greed, jealousy, self-praising and destroying others, they will fall into the three evil realms, go to hell, become animals, and become hungry ghosts. "

Modern medical research has proved that people with jealousy are often in anxiety, resentment and trouble.This kind of negative and unpleasant emotion will cause people's nervous function to be seriously out of balance, which will affect the cardiovascular function, and then lead to arrhythmia, high blood pressure, gastric and duodenal ulcers, coronary heart disease, neurosis and other psychosomatic diseases happened.Thus, jealousy is an unhealthy emotional state.If you are troubled by jealousy, it is difficult to get rid of it, and it is difficult to imagine what the consequences will be.

Once upon a time, there were two brothers. The older brother was named Cain, who was a farmer, and the younger brother was called Abel, who was a shepherd.

One day, his elder brother Cain offered God the produce of the field, and Abel also offered the fat of the firstborn sheep in the flock.God wanted to play a game, so he deliberately pretended not to look down on Cain's offering, but was pleased with Abel's offering.

Cain immediately felt very angry, and his face changed.He thought: God looks down on my offering because Abel's offering is too good.

Seeing the change on his face, God really didn't expect it, he just wanted to make a joke.Then, God said: "Cain, why are you angry? Why did you change your face? Although your offerings are different, the same heart is the same, I feel it."

Cain was already immersed in his "revenge", how could he listen to God's words.In a dark night, Cain brutally killed his brother.

"Now, you don't have any offerings!"

After God found out, it was too late.God said helplessly: "Envy is a cancer in the human body. It will get worse and worse as time goes on, and it will eventually die."

Not long after, Cain chose to end his life amidst self-blame and loneliness.

Envious people always see that others are better than themselves, and cannot see their own advantages.Just like Cain in the story, he only saw the bountiful offerings of his younger brother, but could not see his own hard work.Because of the different offerings, Cain developed a jealous, even distorted psychology.In the end, a catastrophe struck... It is embarrassing to see such a result.

There is a German proverb that is very apt: "Jealousy is a butcher's knife prepared for oneself." Looking through history, there are countless examples of murders caused by jealousy: Yang Xiuqing during the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom was obsessed with power, jealous of Hong Xiuquan and All the princes wanted to seize the throne of the Heavenly King, but were killed in the end; Emperor Yang of Sui was overthrown because of jealousy of talent and ability, which led to the renunciation of his officials; Wang Lun, the first village lord of Shuibo Liangshan, was jealous of Chao Gai and Wu Yong and died... Jealousy of others is nothing more than fear that others are better than oneself, better than oneself.However, being afraid is useless. Jealousy can't make you better immediately, and it can't make good people worse.That being the case, why be jealous of others?
In the face of the excellence of others, we need to use the positive motivating effect caused by jealousy to motivate ourselves to continue to improve, and strive to catch up with and surpass the other party.For example, turn pressure into motivation, turn dissatisfaction into ambition, let yourself have a sense of competition, and push yourself to work hard.You are better than me, and I will be better, even better than you.To surpass others through self-improvement is itself a kind of health awareness.If this kind of awareness is properly displayed, one's own thoughts will become the driving force to achieve the goal, and one's pursuit will have conscience and morality; consider issues from the standpoint of the other party.Everyone wants the moral support of others.When you are jealous of a person, you might as well stand on the other side's standpoint and praise him sincerely.Because trust and friendship will make you feel full, and you can also feel the psychological experience of "selflessness in the heart"; to see your own strengths and discover your own value is an effective way to cultivate self-esteem and eliminate inferiority complex and jealousy. method.

(End of this chapter)