I'll kill you after I finish this game!

Perhaps Lei Zhe lacks the loftiness of the Dao, but his purity is undeniable.

His things, even if ugly, cannot be purified.

A perfect thing is just trash, because it can never improve.

It is precisely because of my own imperfections that that emptiness will keep me moving forward.

I have understood the true meaning of Tai Chi, and I acknowledge and accept it!

The dazzling light of the Heavenly Dao, as radiant as the dawn, became less blinding in Lei Zhe's consciousness; its sacred form was now perceptible and controllable to him.

This deity, which is dedicated to evil and possesses a fastidious nature, has an extraordinary bactericidal effect against all evil.

To avoid being affected, there must be unexpected events outside of this completely mechanical calculation.

P.S.: Please vote and recommend. A god can't lack prestige, after all, its essence is already no weaker than Kirby's power. Also, please don't argue or start any discussions.

Chapter Thirty-Two: The Conflict of Inner Desires

"Om-"

The primordial holy light within his body began to automatically approach the Heavenly Dao's Sorrowful Thoughts Light, but it stopped halfway there and moved towards another gentle and loving light.

However, it stopped halfway through, seemingly attracted and resonating with two forces.

"Oh my, I was surprised to find that Sheng Hui resonated with these two deities."

Although he said he was interested, when Lei Zhe delved into his mind to carefully perceive the third divine spark, his face revealed a resistance that was neither joyful nor happy.

After being amazed by the blessing and love that extends to all living beings, Lei Zhe felt a strange resistance.

Although it was a comforting fluctuation without any threat, it was warm and gentle.

This principle called reincarnation is devoid of any aggression or arrogance, nor does it exude any arrogance that suggests submission to me.

Upon closer examination, all that remains is a comfortable tranquility.

It is full of compassion, and I long to embrace all beings!

Beautiful, sacred, and sensual!

This divine essence seemed to be gently blessing Rezer:

"Be happy, be happy, it's okay, I'll hug you, you'll definitely cheer up, don't look down on the future."

No matter how unreasonable or painful your life may be, happiness will surely come one day!

This divine essence, overflowing with love, is incredibly beautiful, profound, and noble, like a dream!

Just like a gentle mother, she is full of love.

No matter how tough and domineering a man is, there is a soft spot in his heart. The maternal instinct within his divinity is something even the battle maniac Reinhardt of the Day of Wrath of the Gods acknowledges, and he shows a smile of approval.

If... if Rez hadn't attained enlightenment before, he would definitely have loved this divine status...

"...Gentle deity, I don't hate you, but I can't fully accept you, because I am a selfish person..."

A sublime and sacred nature of compassion ignited in Lei Zhe's eyes as he resisted the subconscious influence of reincarnation and rebirth.

But after feeling that loving kindness, tears uncontrollably streamed from his cold, indifferent, and desireless eyes, and he couldn't stop them.

The love within this divinity is so radiant, yet not at all dazzling, for she is the epitome of all-encompassing compassion.

But it's too much of a cheat; this kind of love is simply too hard to refuse.

But Lei Zhe's contradictory and ferocious heart was rebelling, and the desires deep within him were resisting, roaring and howling!

I don't need this kind of equal and undifferentiated love; all I want is a unique love that belongs to me!

The reason I call myself selfish is because I deeply resist this kind of love. My awkward possessiveness prevents me from sharing the love that belongs to me with others.

For example.

Lei Zhe has now realized that he has fallen in love with Xiao You, and he has a strong protective and possessive desire towards girls.

If Xiaoyou shows Lei Zhe a genuine smile and treats him with kindness and gentleness, he will be very happy and pleased.

But if Xiaoyou smiled at others and treated them with kindness and gentleness, Lei Zhe would be jealous, to be honest.

He, who loves Xiaoyou, wouldn't do or say anything to her, but that might not be the case with others.

He himself was like someone huddled up in a world full of mud, filth, and riddled with holes, shivering and holding onto the only source of warmth in the darkness before him with a dazed look in his eyes.

He was surrounded by weapons, armed to the teeth, and constantly on guard against the scumbag who would steal his warmth from the darkness.

Even if someone poses no threat to him, Lei Zhe would never share his warmth with others.

Whether you're an enemy or a harmless nobody, stay away! Don't come near me! I won't share with you!

This is all I have; no one can take even a single bit of it away!

In essence, Lei Zhe is quite like a silly child who is afraid of loneliness and also afraid that the love that belongs to him will be taken away.

After all, children are an extreme and willful form of innocent evil.

In the dark and broken world, clinging to the only warmth that belongs to oneself, one sees that indiscriminate love that shines equally on all beings, illuminating one's own broken and dark world.

Although there may be a moment of heart-stirring feeling, there is a price to pay for receiving this loving light: you must share the warmth with others.

This price made Rezhe's "desire" suddenly turn violent, and he lost all interest in this light of compassion. Now, deep down, he only felt discomfort and disgust.

Give it to others? Are you kidding me? Why should he indiscriminately give it to others?!

I can tolerate guys I find agreeable, but you expect me to share with scum like them who are like excrement?!

No! Get away! Don't touch me! I don't need you!!

I'd rather not have light that doesn't belong to me alone!

You want me to share my precious love with that scumbag? You're dreaming!

So, Razer's "desire" clicked its tongue in disdain and disgust, and he tightly embraced the only warm light that belonged to him. Even if it couldn't shine as brightly as that light, what he held in his arms was undoubtedly his.

The reason why Lei Zhe felt disgusted and resistant to this love becomes clear from this perspective.

This divine power is not as domineering as the previous two. If Lei Zhe were to merge with it, he would only need to open his heart; no tests would be required.

This divine inclusiveness is outrageously high, and the concepts of expulsion and resistance do not exist.

This gentle deity, on the contrary, took the initiative to embrace him and merge with him.

It was Reiji himself who was resisting.

So his current situation with this logic is both laughable and pathetic.

The simple-minded child, locked in a dilapidated little dark room, leaned against his small fire, looking at the beautiful flowers in his potted plant, peacefully enjoying this unique warmth, and wanting to protect this beauty.

I don't want anyone to interfere; I'll just keep things as they are and let them change slowly. I'll just stay isolated like this; that's all that matters...

Outside the dilapidated little dark house, a gentle and loving mother patiently persuades her child to come out. There is no coldness or darkness around her; she will still love him and give this light to the child without expecting anything in return.

However, this love must be shared with someone you dislike; it cannot belong solely to yourself.

The foolish child listened to the gentle whispers outside the house and glanced impatiently at the deadly weapon beside him.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't directed at that gentle mother.

He would waver from time to time because of the other person's gentleness, but the thought that that love would be given to a disgusting scumbag like Zai Zai made it impossible for him to get rid of the disgust and resistance in his heart.

"Although I understand the true meaning of Tai Chi, there are some things I just can't accept!"

Lei Zhe's face showed a hint of irritation, and he raised his hand to scratch his hair in annoyance.

Honestly, why did I have to draw this divine title? Although it's a very gentle one, I just can't deceive my own conscience.

Discomfort is discomfort, and resistance is resistance.

Just imagining yourself showing kindness and redemption to those disgusting scumbags makes Reiz feel nauseous!

He couldn't be so compassionate; his heart couldn't accommodate so many people. Xiaoyou and the others were enough to show him kindness.

It's okay to show kindness occasionally to people you don't dislike, but it should never be unlimited!

"Ugh! This is so annoying!!"

The more Lei Zhe thought about it, the more agitated he became. After letting out a low growl of displeasure, he stood up and hurriedly left the room.

Right now, only Xiao Sheng and Xiao You are in the living room. Chun Nai and Ai Sha are probably doing something in another dimension, so they haven't appeared yet.

Lei Zhe's shadow clone was making breakfast, while Xiao You and Xiao Sheng were somewhat surprised to see Lei Zhe looking irritable and impatient.

What's going on so early in the morning?

Zhe, what's wrong with you...?

Before Xiaoyou could fully display her notebook, Lei Zhe had already come up to her in front of her, much to Xiaoyou's puzzlement.

"Xiaoyou, let me hug you."

Saying this so capriciously, Lei Zhe sat down next to Xiao You and hugged the bewildered silver-haired girl.

Seeing this, Xiao Sheng, who was playing games on the other side of the sofa, immediately lost his laziness and glared angrily at Lei Zhe.

Lei Zhe couldn't care less about anything else. He gently placed his nose against Xiao You's head, inhaling the captivating fragrance of the girl's silver hair, which gradually calmed the rage within him.

Ah~~, the love that belongs to me is right here in my arms, so I don't need an equal love that can't belong to me alone.

It's wishful thinking to expect him to share his gentleness with others!

[What are you doing all of a sudden? Let me go! I'm so embarrassed! (≧▽≦)]

When Xiaoyou, who was in Lei Zhe's arms, saw Xiaosheng's eyes, she held the notebook above her head in front of Lei Zhe and immediately began to resist shyly.

Xiaoyou doesn't dislike Lei Zhe's affectionate behavior, after all, their fates are already tied together, but could he consider her shy feelings?

She can't bring herself to be affectionate in front of others.

"You're no longer going to hide anything, Zhe?!"

Xiao Sheng glared angrily at the man and woman in front of him, and said in a low voice with a forced smile.

Damn it! While I was away, this necromancer actually raided my house, though I managed to salvage the situation a little.

But in reality, she had already fallen behind this necromancer. Xiao Sheng could sense that in terms of Lei Zhe's spiritual status, this necromancer had already surpassed her by a little bit.

"I'm sorry, I was so confused and agitated. I'm so grateful to Xiaoyou for calming me down."