In this cyberpunk era, why are you still playing the traditional villain?

Chapter 230 If I die, will you cry for me?

Going to sea is actually a very boring thing, and the longer you go, the more boring it becomes.

The main problem was that there wasn't much to do before finding the target, Poseidon. In fact, due to the nature of the sea, it wasn't safe to stay on the deck for long, so most of the time everyone had to stay in the cabin.

The royal family and the Papacy are subtly competing, both going all out to find the sea god first and claim the credit for themselves.

Unfortunately, the shipbuilding capabilities of the Hualan Empire were limited, and no matter how fast they tried, they couldn't match the speed of Xu Shi's two ships.

However, Xu Shi was happy to relax and deliberately slowed down his speed to keep up with them.

This kind of thing isn't about who gets there first and who gets rewarded; it's more likely that someone will snatch the reward from behind. Each of the three parties has their own agenda, and only by binding them together can he make better use of them.

So after giving his foolish apprentice a few assignments, he stayed in the captain's cabin, idly observing the situation on the sea.

"...Are you still angry?"

Just as I was feeling bored, Xie Qingyan's voice came from behind me, "You don't seem to be in a good mood."

The question was somewhat amusing, and it naturally referred to the time he angrily made a promise before setting sail.

"Isn't it all your fault that we had to do this?"

Xu Shi glanced back at her, feigning indignation. He hadn't forgotten that it was that bitch who had started the trouble.

"Then should I apologize to you?"

Xie Qingyan didn't deny it, but smiled and moved closer to him, her breath sweet as orchids, "Besides, I think Chairman Xu isn't really that petty, right?"

"You know again?"

Xu Shi snorted, "If you really want to apologize, then show me your true colors. A few words of apology are not enough for me."

"You really want to see it?"

Xie Qingyan wasn't annoyed that he was teasing her in return. She simply pulled her collar down a little to reveal a small patch of white skin. "Here, is that enough?"

"Oh? Such a nice attitude?"

Her humble attitude surprised Xu Shi a bit. This wasn't like you, the proud and arrogant Chairman Xie.

However, this person was always shameless. Since the other party made such a statement, he went along with it and reached out his groping hand, putting on a lecherous look, "Come on, let me see if you're developing normally."

"Humph, that's a nice thought."

The woman took a step back and quickly straightened her clothes, refusing to let him get away with it. "You're getting cocky just because I said you're fat... Don't think I don't know what you're thinking."

Anyway, she, or rather everyone knows, is very hypocritical. She always likes to have one thing in common, and if she really wants to win someone over, she usually won't say it outright. She prefers to hint at it to others before taking action.

When the time comes, he'll have something to say: "You forced me to do this, I had no choice, I'm so sorry..." You've figured everything out.

As for what he said, it might not have really been said in the heat of the moment—if it were anyone else, you could just take it as a warning, but if it were Xu Shi, Xie Qingyan really wouldn't doubt that he had the ability to say it.

He was so convinced that if he wanted to, it wouldn't be difficult for Qin Yiyan to kneel on the ground with her hands tied behind her back and beg him, since there were precedents for it.

The most obvious example is probably Xia Wuyou. Everyone could see how resistant she was at first, but now she's completely obedient and as docile as can be.

"...No matter what you say, I really don't like red hair."

Xu Shi paused for a moment, then stopped keeping a straight face, laughed and waved his hand.

Whether he was being smug or not is debatable, but he certainly wasn't angry.

Or perhaps he was just saying it on purpose to lighten the mood.

Anyway, he doesn't deny that since the matter of Night City was settled, he felt much more at ease and enjoyed spending time happily with the girls.

Whether they offered themselves willingly or were forced to change, they were all devoted to him. If you really want to talk about it, it wouldn't be an exaggeration to call them family. There's no need to scheme against them; there's nothing wrong with laughing and joking around.

Of course, it wouldn't be right to say he had no ulterior motives at all. For example, right now, it's obvious that he's deliberately putting on this act to set a trap for the girls. I'm very angry, come and coax me.

"It's best if you don't like her."

Xie Qingyan saw through it but didn't say anything. She was just here to coax you anyway. "Coincidentally, I don't like her either."

Or rather, she didn't like Xu Shi having anyone else around him, not even potential partners. After all, she wasn't as open-minded as others. This mindset stemmed from a sense of insecurity about her position. She knew that she and Xu Shi were at most lovers, mostly not quite lovers, far less than other people.

What, you mean Xia Ke'an?

That old man... that old cucumber painted green could follow Xu Shi around calling him "Dad" every day; that's something no one else could do.

However, while she thought this in her heart, she didn't show it on the surface. Instead, she magically produced a bottle of red wine and said, "Want to have a drink? I've never had a drink with you before."

"No way?"

Xu Shi, oblivious to the romance, corrected him, "Didn't we have a good drink together when we were discussing the 'Twins' collaboration? I remember Qingyan, you drank a bottle and a half in one go."

"...That was just business etiquette, it doesn't count."

The woman rolled her eyes at him. "Isn't it said that drinking is for heart-to-heart talks? Have we ever had a heart-to-heart talk like that? No, we haven't."

"Oh~~"

Xu Shi drew out the last syllable, looking as if he had suddenly realized something.

Xie Qingyan then realized that he had been led by the nose again...

She filled the glass to the brim with a disgruntled tone. "Just tell me, are you going to drink or not? I'll punish you with a glass!"

"Drink, drink, drink."

Xu laughed heartily, raised his hands in a gesture of surrender, and then picked up his wine glass and drank it all in one gulp.

I was just kidding, why are you getting so worked up?

The wine was fine; before setting off from Night City, no one intended to skimp on themselves, and the supplies they brought on the ship were all high-quality.

But he was more curious about something else: "Why did you suddenly decide to have a heart-to-heart talk with me?"

As we all know, having a heart-to-heart talk with Xu Shi is often a dangerous thing; you might end up falling into a ditch if you're not careful.

"...I can't explain it either."

Hearing his question, Xie Qingyan suddenly felt a little disappointed. "Maybe it's because of... what you said before we left?"

Which part are you referring to?

Xu Shi blinked. "The part where I asked Wuyou to change clothes?"

"It's the part where you say who you want to miss."

The woman, unusually, didn't argue with him, and her tone became increasingly melancholy, "When you were talking, I thought about it too, but when I turned around, I realized... I don't have anyone to care about."

“My father passed away long ago. As for the other veterans and key figures in ‘Prism’… I won’t lie to you, in my eyes, they are nothing more than pawns.”

She poured herself a full glass, saying, "It's the same with everyone else. Everyone's just using relationships. How much of it is genuine?"

"When I think about it, it seems that Shanshan is the only person I can truly be close to. That little girl still loves to argue with me and is not well-behaved at all."

"so?"

Xu Shi pressed on with great interest.

"So I was thinking, if I have no one to care about, then conversely, does that mean no one will care about me?"

Xie Qingyan sighed and traced circles on the side of the wine glass with her finger.

Seeing her like this, Xu Shi also toned down his frivolousness and his tone became more serious, "Don't be so arbitrary, there are still people who care about you."

"Who?"

"me."

Xu Shi laughed and said, "My fiancée is as beautiful as a flower, of course I don't want to see anything happen to her."

"...Is this considered a consolation?"

"Not entirely."

"I'll take it."

Xie Qingyan smiled, but her smile carried a bitter taste.

The phrase "not entirely" perfectly encapsulates the relationship between her and Xu Shi.

He could confide in her like anyone else, and she could banter with him every now and then, but the rift between them remained, impossible to bridge.

That's why she's jealous—jealous that other girls can joke around with him without any burden, because they all have a clear conscience, right?

She was even jealous of Xu Shi. This bastard had people who cared about him, and others who cared about him too, such as those people in Night City of Sin. They were probably all praying for his safe return.

Xie Qingyan was the only exception. No matter what, she could never fully integrate into the relationship. Her feelings towards Xu Shishi were always like a rollercoaster. Sometimes they were wonderful, but as soon as someone stirred things up, they would plummet.

For example, when Jiang Chengcheng retorted last time, no one else would have been angry, because they wouldn't have worried that Xu Shi might discard them like trash one day. That would never happen.

But she will. She has always had this worry because she just lied and said that there was no one she could care about, but isn't this man in front of her the one she can care about?

At least she couldn't hide it from herself; she simply couldn't live without him, or was unwilling to give him up again. She couldn't put on airs in front of him, and she would be happy to hear him say he wanted to watch the stars with her. She would even feel jealous and envious of him.

But that barrier stood between them, preventing her and Xu Shi from ever being completely honest with each other. This limbo stuck in her heart, making it hard for her to breathe.

For a moment, she really wanted to get herself completely drunk, and then, fueled by the alcohol, grab this bastard by the collar and demand an explanation: what exactly do you want?

However, she ultimately dismissed the idea, because she knew that she had created the crack herself, and the answer to this question was the same as what Xu Shi had said before: he didn't know.

She herself didn't know, and nobody else did.

"I doubt anyone would care if I died, right?"

Thinking this way, she felt relieved. "I know how many people call me a she-devil behind my back."

"Don't say things like that, it's bad luck."

Xu Shi blinked. Goodness, everyone else's emo just now was just a reaction to the scene, but you've gotten so caught up in it that you can't get out?

But he wasn't unaware of the reason behind the other party's mentality; it was just a pity that he truly couldn't answer it.

Maybe sex would help? The saying "one shot solves all your problems" isn't just a joke... but it only works temporarily and doesn't solve the problem at its root. In the long run, it might even backfire.

He himself couldn't deny that his relationship with Xie Qingyan was too strange. He could bully this dog of a woman without any burden, and he could also say, "Let this rose remove all its thorns."

But looking at her now, he suddenly felt a little uncertain. Even if she really changed as he wanted, could he completely let go of the past conflicts?

He used to think it was definitely possible, but now... Xu Shi is not so sure.