Honkai Impact 3rd, a simulator of lifelong regret!

The well-defined knuckles were less than five centimeters away from that fat, sagging face, yet it felt like an eternity.

No matter how much anger burned within her, no matter how dissatisfied she felt with everything, the only thing the girl could do was to control herself.

Or rather, right now, more than anger, more than this inexplicable burning of reason, I feel a sense of relief that I didn't continue the fight.

The belated arrival of rationality forcefully prevented the final, worst-case scenario from occurring, leaving room for redemption, even in the most humble manner and with the most clownish behavior.

I……

doing what?

Why would someone do such a thing?

If I really do that, my date with Jiang Cheng will be completely ruined, and the impression left by our first time together off-campus will definitely be terrible.

No, absolutely not. That kind of thing is absolutely forbidden. Leaving a bad impression on Jiangcheng is strictly prohibited and unacceptable.

The girl was certainly not a weak and incompetent good-for-nothing, but unfortunately, she had far too many things that were considered a burden in a universal sense.

If in the past I chose to endure because of numbness, now it's purely out of fear. I can't accept losing even this little bit I have. I'm desperately trying to hold onto the last glimmer of light, desperately trying to close my fingers, even if it means losing a lot in the process.

The fear of losing Jiangcheng was even more intense than the nameless rage rising in his heart, instantly replacing the raging flames.

I don't care about the insults, I don't care about the ridicule, I can even endure paying more money, but I absolutely cannot lose Jiangcheng.

In most cases, a kind of cowardly calmness replaced her anger, and Raiden Mei could only watch helplessly as the shopkeeper, who had just been terrified and made a fool of himself, began to smugly provoke her.

"—Disorderly conduct is punishable by detention."

……

"After all this time, you know the police officers here. Do you think the descendant of a financial fraudster is easier to bully, or the manager of the only souvenir shop on this street is more likely to be taken in for questioning?"

The store manager's ugly face was undisguised, and his smugness was portrayed with consummate skill, especially after the girl actually stopped.

Just now, he was caught up in the girl's pathetic display of fear and her resistance. But then, realizing what had happened, he resorted to his most habitual and frequently used tactic of kicking someone when they're down. In the end, the girl was just putting on an act; a single word could have stopped her.

Loud, thunderous snoring came from his slightly parted, thick lips, like a live wild boar. His greasy, disheveled hair hadn't been washed or trimmed in ages, and his dark skin was covered in thick, grimy sweat, creating a sweltering, almost blinding haze. The distinctive sour, pungent smell of a middle-aged man assaulted the delicate nose of the young girl before him.

"You don't want your date with him to fall through, do you?"

……

Only now could the girl realize more deeply her own weakness, incompetence, and worthlessness, and understand how intensely malicious this world was to her, to the point that she wanted to tear it apart and destroy her soul.

"it is good……"

"I'll buy."

……

There is no other choice left.

Raiden Mei was so clearly aware that it was a voice from the depths of her heart, like a divine decree, which could not be disobeyed or stopped.

It was as if a talkative myna bird was circling the girl, proclaiming the established facts: willpower, awareness, thoughts... those seemingly glamorous and dazzling things couldn't even last a second under the heavy pressure of reality.

They're nothing but bubbles in the sunlight, only able to exist in photographs or fairy tales; they couldn't even last a second in reality.

It has always been this way.

That's normal.

Her eyebrows drooped limply, and her face, which should have been filled with anger and humiliation, was instantly replaced by numbness and powerlessness. The delicate and lovely young lady, when alone, reverted to the state she had before being rescued by the boy.

After the store manager uttered those words, all the space seemed to be squeezed in an instant. There seemed to be countless smarter and more useful ways, countless other solutions, and you could even just turn around and leave instead of being a sucker. In the end, only the stupidest one was left.

Because that idiot named Raiden Mei would never allow anything to go wrong in Jiangcheng, including the date, because of her. Even the slightest possibility of ruining it would make the girl feel deeply inadequate.

Yes.

Perhaps we don't need to do it, or perhaps it's unnecessary.

Jiang Cheng is not the type of person who would leave a bad impression after just one date. Even if this one was ruined, even if it left Jiang Cheng with a very, very, very bad impression, he can still be invited again next time. After all, his dormitory address is clearly written on his student ID.

Even if I might be seen as a pervert, as long as someone comes to the dormitory, knocks on the door outside, and squats there like a dog without leaving the room, they will eventually have to open the door and listen to my request.

Losing so much money over such a trivial matter, being so easily manipulated by a disgusting store manager who has no sense of proportion and is not thrifty—if Jiang Cheng finds out, his opinion of him will only drop further.

She is clearly neither virtuous nor thrifty. If you brought someone like that home, they would definitely get a good scolding from your family first.

Oh, I'm sorry...

Really sorry.

If a person with low self-esteem can control their emotions, how can they be called someone with low self-esteem?

Those who can remain unmoved after their weaknesses are exposed, who can calmly assess the situation and offer solutions, are unlikely to become insecure people from the start.

"Seventy-two hundred thousand."

"Here is 120,000; the rest will be paid by bank card."

The wallet, so thin it was almost pitiful, had only a tiny bit left. Her slender fingers trembled, yet she handed over all the money with unwavering determination.

If this way, she and Jiang Cheng can avoid any trouble that day, enjoy their weekend to the fullest, and leave a good impression on the boy on their first date...

It's understandable and acceptable. As long as it's for Jiangcheng, even if we have to pay a higher price in the future, it's still acceptable, right?

……

In the end, the gift that should have belonged to the young girl was finally returned to her, even though she paid a heavy price for it, and even though the ribbon and outer casing of this precious gift had been tainted and defiled by others.

Fortunately, this style of silk was readily available, and the shop manager, perhaps seeing that the girl was on the verge of a breakdown, did not dare to add insult to injury and instead refrained from making any further threats.

The box, stained by someone else's dirty fingers, was thrown away, and the gift was rewrapped carefully, with even the corners and edges decorated perfectly.

Perhaps because of what happened before, this time the outfit is more elaborate than the last, with even the flower petals made of soft silk.

"All right……"

"Finally, the gift for Jiangcheng is ready."

"That way... I'll definitely get more attention."

Raiden Mei bit her lip lightly, carrying the wish she had held since the beginning of the date, and carefully tucked the exquisite gift box into her handbag.

No matter how bumpy the road was, no matter how much we had to pay the price, at least we got back on track in the end. As long as we can achieve our goal, it doesn't matter how much we have to pay—until that greasy voice, like a fat pig grunting and pointing, deliberately offered its usual greeting.

"Come again next time, Mei-chan."

"Even though I would agree to such a request, doing business with you once means I can not work for several months. Mei-chan is truly my lucky star."

……

Perhaps emboldened by the brief moment of peace, Raiden Mei was utterly terrified by the disgusting greeting. Forcibly suppressing her thoughts resulted in her appearing like a walking corpse, with no trace of thunderous brilliance in her deep purple eyes.

Even if you try to warm up when you return to the dessert shop, it's hard for your body to recover quickly after being exposed to the cold wind outside for half a day.

Reason cannot dictate emotion, and thoughts cannot completely control the body. No matter how much you try to pretend everything is fine, you can never suppress your disappointment.

The final step into the room was still too light, so much so that even Jiang Cheng didn't notice at first. It wasn't until the shadow approached and stepped into the third layer of the power of the Star Sea Oblique Law that he looked up to offer his condolences.

"You're back."

"Um……"

"Thing is settled."

Raiden Mei nodded gently, her clenched teeth parted, and as she returned to her seat, the delicate lines of her lips softened and turned upward.

At least the gift has been prepared.

All you need to do is keep some pictures of the date.

As for life... we'll think about the rest later. Even if it was a momentary impulse, it's a realization I've made after calming down. I'm sure my future self won't regret this now.

Overthinking about how to live in the future will only make you miss the present moment. If you make Jiang Cheng dislike you because of your sour face, then you'll really only have one way out: death.

……

She hid all her emotions and troubles behind her back, burying them deep in the soil, leaving only the most normal and flawless side. Her smile seemed polite and normal, and all the acting skills she had used when socializing with her classmates were displayed here, but she could not escape the wisdom of Vervière.

Even the Queen of Thunder's acting skills are ultimately only at a high school student level, unable to conceal the turbulent emotions beneath her gentle demeanor.

It's even a little creepy; she deliberately hides her emotions, only revealing a gentle side, as if she could turn into a yandere at any moment.

Jiang Cheng frowned, tightening his grip on the silver spoon. The drink in his hand inexplicably became bland and tasteless, and even the cake lost some of its sweetness—his concern for the girl was subconsciously expressed, without any pretense or perfunctoriness, genuinely and earnestly raising his question.

"Are you OK?"

"What just happened?"

what……

Gazing into those deep blue eyes so close to hers, the boy, who was so serious for the first time today, his face etched with concern, touched her rosy lips with her pearly white teeth, as if trying to distract himself—Raiden Mei's expression instantly turned somewhat embarrassed.

Will they still be able to see through it after all?

As expected of Jiangcheng.

With my mediocre acting skills, which are probably comparable to being naked, it would be impossible for me to perform successfully in front of someone as capable as Jiang Cheng.

Even knowing she would be seen through, after a brief silence, what came out of her rosy lips was still an excessively sweet gentleness.

"without……"

"nothing."

Things like this...

Jiangcheng must never find out.

……

This is undoubtedly a perfunctory response.

Even without relying on the wisdom and experience passed down from Wilvie, Jiang Cheng could tell at a glance that she possessed the talent of a Herrscher's body. If left unchecked, she would immediately transform into a Herrscher's body. He could even see the girl's subtle movements, even her slender fingers were intertwined.

If Raiden Mei hadn't revealed everything she was hiding without any emotional intelligence, the girl might have fallen into a very desperate situation before being saved, and Kiana might not have even had a chance to appear.

Is it because you're afraid of seeing yourself being bullied?

Thinking about it carefully, Raiden Mei had never actually told me anything about being bullied or anything related to the bullying she had suffered.

In most cases, even when Raiden Mei complains about those people or is implicated in Dianlongma's financial fraud case and imprisonment, it's usually her own idea. During casual conversations, she intentionally steers the conversation towards that topic—in order to help Raiden Mei relieve some stress through words. The girl herself is very averse to this kind of thing and doesn't want to talk about it.