"Don't worry, honey, I'll fix you up with our only red wine. We're known for our beer and the hard stuff, but we keep a bit of wine on hand. You stayin' at the Inn?"
I really needed that wine; it always added a small boost to my courage. "Yes, I am."
"Okay, pick what you want off the menu. I'll grab you a glass and be right back for your order."
She winked at me and I realized I needed to loosen up a bit more; the wine would help. I also needed to remember I had dreams of being a successful journalist. I needed to tough uncomfortable situations out and grow some balls. I took a sip of water, stiffened my spine, and looked around. More pictures of the local rugby teams lined the walls. Trophies and plaques too. The entire tavern paid homage to rugby.
Estella set my wine glass down. "What did you decide, hun?"
My smile was a bit wider this time. "I'll have the dinner salad."
She reached in front of me and opened the menu. "That's nothing but a few pieces of lettuce, a single cherry tomato, and two slices of cucumber. Try the chef salad and I'll have Dusty throw a little extra on it for you."
Of course my stomach picked this exact moment to gurgle, so how could I argue. "Umm, okay, with vinegar and oil please." Exercise and I didn't mix, so I had to settle for walking at a fast pace when I could and constantly watching calories.
"Taste that wine and tell me what you think."
Here goes nothing. I gave it a small test sniff and then under Estella's watchful eye, took a sip of the nastiest-tasting wine I'd ever had. It was a fight to control my facial muscles and not give my distaste away. Without choking, I managed to speak. "Good, thank you."
"If you're around tomorrow night we'll fix you up something that'll put some hair on your chest."
How could I answer that? Hair was already popping up here and there from the wine. "Umm, okay?"
Estella laughed full out again. "I like you, hun. How long you staying with us?"
"I'm not sure. A few days at least." If The Slam lost this week's game, my short exposé on rugby would come to an abrupt halt. That wishful thought had me doing a happy dance in my head.
"Will you be around for the big match Saturday?"
"Yes, I should be."
"Well if you are, let me know and I'll hold you a seat in the tavern. We start filling up as soon as the match ends."
"Thank you, I'll do that." Estella looked past my sloppy clothes and huge glasses, making me feel welcome. I was sure she never met anyone who wasn't an instant friend. I would give anything to have her confidence. She left to help a new customer, and I finished checking my email. There was one from Ted.
Sorry we didn't speak before you left. If I had your number, I'd have given you a heads up. Congratulations, and yes, this is my way of asking for your number.
Ted
Oh crap, my cheeks burned. I had no friends at work. I kept my head down and did my job while avoiding as much office conversation and gossip as possible. I brought my lunch and ate at my desk with a book opened in front of me. When I first started at the Journal, some of the women invited me out, but I shyly refused. They stopped asking and most of the time I think they forgot I was even there. When Ted spoke to me, I rarely looked up. He seemed like a nice guy, a little old for me, but he'd never been anything but professional. Had I somehow given him the wrong impression? Did he arrange this assignment because of it? I panicked over situations like this and it was the last thing I needed. I counted to twenty as I calmed my breathing.
On my third count to twenty, my salad arrived with a slice of apple pie. "I'll put it in a to-go box if you need me to. A little homemade apple pie never hurt anyone." Estella gave me a wink and strolled away.
I moved my iPad aside and tentatively took a bite of salad, refusing to look at the pie. The vinegar and oil was pre-applied and a little more than I liked, but it was good. I ate the turkey and the boiled egg, pushing the other meat to the side, managing to eat half the large salad.
Without me asking, Estella brought a small Styrofoam box with a wrapped plastic fork for the pie. After I left, I thought about slipping the box into the Inn's garbage dumpster, but the free pie was such a nice gesture. I'd save it in the small room fridge and maybe take a bite or two in the morning. I knew it would taste delicious because everything fattening always did.
I closed my hotel room door behind me with a sigh of relief. I'd faced my fears the entire day and survived. Now it was my time. I removed my clothes, taking off the tight bra and massaging my breasts. There was a full mirror on the small closet door. Indents lined my skin from the bra. I dropped my hands and stared at myself. My huge breasts made my waist appear smaller than it was. Though my nipples pointed straight out, my breasts sagged slightly. In a few years it would be much worse. I pulled a large nightshirt over my head. I slept with nothing beneath the cotton material. If my career took off after this, I would start saving more than a few coins here and there for the surgery that would make me normal. Exhaustion from no sleep the night before and a day of travel rolled over me. Once my head hit the pillow, I dreamed of apple pie.
I really needed that wine; it always added a small boost to my courage. "Yes, I am."
"Okay, pick what you want off the menu. I'll grab you a glass and be right back for your order."
She winked at me and I realized I needed to loosen up a bit more; the wine would help. I also needed to remember I had dreams of being a successful journalist. I needed to tough uncomfortable situations out and grow some balls. I took a sip of water, stiffened my spine, and looked around. More pictures of the local rugby teams lined the walls. Trophies and plaques too. The entire tavern paid homage to rugby.
Estella set my wine glass down. "What did you decide, hun?"
My smile was a bit wider this time. "I'll have the dinner salad."
She reached in front of me and opened the menu. "That's nothing but a few pieces of lettuce, a single cherry tomato, and two slices of cucumber. Try the chef salad and I'll have Dusty throw a little extra on it for you."
Of course my stomach picked this exact moment to gurgle, so how could I argue. "Umm, okay, with vinegar and oil please." Exercise and I didn't mix, so I had to settle for walking at a fast pace when I could and constantly watching calories.
"Taste that wine and tell me what you think."
Here goes nothing. I gave it a small test sniff and then under Estella's watchful eye, took a sip of the nastiest-tasting wine I'd ever had. It was a fight to control my facial muscles and not give my distaste away. Without choking, I managed to speak. "Good, thank you."
"If you're around tomorrow night we'll fix you up something that'll put some hair on your chest."
How could I answer that? Hair was already popping up here and there from the wine. "Umm, okay?"
Estella laughed full out again. "I like you, hun. How long you staying with us?"
"I'm not sure. A few days at least." If The Slam lost this week's game, my short exposé on rugby would come to an abrupt halt. That wishful thought had me doing a happy dance in my head.
"Will you be around for the big match Saturday?"
"Yes, I should be."
"Well if you are, let me know and I'll hold you a seat in the tavern. We start filling up as soon as the match ends."
"Thank you, I'll do that." Estella looked past my sloppy clothes and huge glasses, making me feel welcome. I was sure she never met anyone who wasn't an instant friend. I would give anything to have her confidence. She left to help a new customer, and I finished checking my email. There was one from Ted.
Sorry we didn't speak before you left. If I had your number, I'd have given you a heads up. Congratulations, and yes, this is my way of asking for your number.
Ted
Oh crap, my cheeks burned. I had no friends at work. I kept my head down and did my job while avoiding as much office conversation and gossip as possible. I brought my lunch and ate at my desk with a book opened in front of me. When I first started at the Journal, some of the women invited me out, but I shyly refused. They stopped asking and most of the time I think they forgot I was even there. When Ted spoke to me, I rarely looked up. He seemed like a nice guy, a little old for me, but he'd never been anything but professional. Had I somehow given him the wrong impression? Did he arrange this assignment because of it? I panicked over situations like this and it was the last thing I needed. I counted to twenty as I calmed my breathing.
On my third count to twenty, my salad arrived with a slice of apple pie. "I'll put it in a to-go box if you need me to. A little homemade apple pie never hurt anyone." Estella gave me a wink and strolled away.
I moved my iPad aside and tentatively took a bite of salad, refusing to look at the pie. The vinegar and oil was pre-applied and a little more than I liked, but it was good. I ate the turkey and the boiled egg, pushing the other meat to the side, managing to eat half the large salad.
Without me asking, Estella brought a small Styrofoam box with a wrapped plastic fork for the pie. After I left, I thought about slipping the box into the Inn's garbage dumpster, but the free pie was such a nice gesture. I'd save it in the small room fridge and maybe take a bite or two in the morning. I knew it would taste delicious because everything fattening always did.
I closed my hotel room door behind me with a sigh of relief. I'd faced my fears the entire day and survived. Now it was my time. I removed my clothes, taking off the tight bra and massaging my breasts. There was a full mirror on the small closet door. Indents lined my skin from the bra. I dropped my hands and stared at myself. My huge breasts made my waist appear smaller than it was. Though my nipples pointed straight out, my breasts sagged slightly. In a few years it would be much worse. I pulled a large nightshirt over my head. I slept with nothing beneath the cotton material. If my career took off after this, I would start saving more than a few coins here and there for the surgery that would make me normal. Exhaustion from no sleep the night before and a day of travel rolled over me. Once my head hit the pillow, I dreamed of apple pie.
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