First Love Never Dies

“Mistress?”

I shrank in surprise. When I was lost in my thoughts, Louise’s voice brought me back to reality.

“Oh, yes, I’m tired. I want to get some rest.”

I beckoned her to come closer with an euphemistic look on my face.

For some reason, Louise couldn’t control her expression and showed a nervous look. I was worried about what she was thinking inside.

Louise is a spy that was planted by the Emperor. It wasn’t surprising since it was a plausible thought. Rather, it’d be a surprise to think she wasn’t one. It wasn’t so strange that she was suspicious of everyone around her, except for Alyssa, the one who solely relied on her.

‘The Emperor is trying to keep the Duke in check and in his control.’

It means that he indeed cares about Rashid’s existence. It seems that my marriage with Rashid is worthwhile that even the Emperor himself checks and gets himself involved with it.

‘He (Rashid) probably thinks that I’m the Emperor’s snitch, someone who tells him Rashid’s every single move.’

The thought reminded me of Rashid’s hostility and wariness towards me. Now that I think about it, it’d be reasonable to doubt me from his point of view.

I stared at Louise who was cleaning up the tea.

I had never seen Louise’s name when I read the novel. She was probably just a Maid 1, or she left the mansion after Alyssa died.

I don’t know what to do with her. I think I’ll have to let her go once I know her true colors behind that polite facade. Is that what I should call it? Is it even possible to do that?

I’ll have to get Louise out of the room first. So many things had happened all of a sudden that my mind was exhausted. I needed some time to pick my own thoughts up and relax.

“Louise, I want to rest. Can you leave me alone?”

“Oh my God, Mistress…”

“Quickly.”

I strictly cut Louise off. She looked at me for a moment and lowered her head without further ado. She took cautious steps out of the room.

***

That night…

Back in her room, Louise bit her nails. It was a habit that came out whenever she was embarrassed.

Somehow, what Alyssa Fenvernon had said during the day bothered her.

Of course, it was natural for Alyssa to worry about her lack of qualifications as a Duchess. In fact, Louise made sure that Alyssa was aware of it by carefully choosing her words to give that implication. However, if you think about it, the timing of what Alyssa said and what Louise thought wasn’t so strange.

‘But…’

Louise still felt uncomfortable.

After her near-death experience, Alyssa acted different from before. It was just like when someone had a fever, their words and actions were inconsistent with how they usually were. (tl: it means that Alyssa’s actions now aren’t consistent with how she usually is)

But what if Alyssa dies because of this illness? (tl: Louise considers her different personality as an “illness”)

Anxiety crept up from the bottom of Louise’s heart.

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If Alyssa dies, the position as the wife of Duke Fenvernon will be vacant again. Then the plan to use Alyssa as a bridge to make connections with other noble families will go down the drain. (tl: Louise won’t be able to do her plan without Alyssa anymore)

To make it easy as it is now, the next Duchess needs to be a mess like Alyssa, but what would happen then?

How nice it would be if the Duke and Louise were to meet in the meantime.

Louise had a dreamlike imagination. Even having a government position is enough for her. But being in the position as Duchess guaranteed that you could never feel unhappy. And it’s not like Louise can’t do what Alyssa does. But in the first place, she and Alyssa were already so different.

Louise is an illegitimate child of a local baron. The baron didn’t recognize her as his blood because she was the child from a maid he spent the night with.