Jake's POV

"I am bisexual" I finally breathed out.

My parents who were looking at me with anticipation, hoping for me to announce some kind of award I won sat there, shocked. My mom's reaction was more apparent than my Dad. My Dad simply stared at me coldly.

"No," my father declared.

"What do you mean no"! I protested. 

"You are not to be some faggot! You are to find yourself some girlfriend and settle". He ordered. "This is just a phase, there is no way you like girls. You are confused". He huffed.

"Dad, don't you think I'd know if I was confused"! I scoffed.

"You are young. You are confused. And now go to your room and stop this nonsense" his father's tone changed which meant if Jake disobeyed his father anymore, he'll face dire consequences.

I bit my inner lip, almost making it bleed before I felt my cheeks wet. I stormed off to my room and stuffed my face into the mattress and cried. Who would say that I am a fourteen year old boy?  I cried like a four year one. I couldn't believe that I agreed to this. Roger Kendrik, my current boyfriend, convinced me to come out to my parents. Now I don't think they'll even allow me to see him. 

He used to come by often, under the impression that he was my friend. Which he was, back in those days. I remember we were watching a horror movie one night, my parents were at some fancy dinner party and how adorably he panicked and jumped right into my lap… and well things happened.

It's been two months since we were dating. Turns out, he always had some sort of crush on me, but he hid it under the impression that I was straight. To be fair even I didn't know at that time. I have dated my fair share of girls, never realised that I would like guys as well… but I did.

He was out and proud and I was… not so much. I kind of assumed my parents would not be okay with this, and boy was I right. They belonged to high society, the perfect family people looked upto, the one people envied.How can that family have someone 'imperfect' like me? I am that one dent in that otherwise perfect car. 

As I cried, regretting my decision, I wondered if I should go back. Maybe admit that I am not bisexual, that yes I was confused. It's not like I told them that I had a boyfriend. I can simply lie about my crush. But then again, this whole thing would be pointless. I know my Dad said that these are just hormones and some feelings I will eventually get over... That I am confused, but deep down inside he believes what I said. I doubt he will ever be able to trust my friendship with any other guy, let alone Roger.

It was late in the evening, but…. Why did it feel like only a few minutes passed? I remember it was midday a while ago. I know sleep makes time pass away fast, but is it the same for crying as well? I heard a clunking noise coming from the door. It was none other than my beautiful mother bringing me a glass of milk. "Hey baby, you hungry" She asked me nicely.

"No mum" I looked away. I was, I really was… my stomach screamed that I was, but I was also too stubborn to admit that. 

"Nevertheless, you should have this. You are growing, you need nutrition." said my mother. She sat down next to me and gently patted my head, "Is it really that much of a big deal?" She asked. "Why anger your father"?

"It's important to me. It's who I am. What if I suddenly ask you to date a girl" I argued.

She chuckled, "That's ridiculous. How can a woman date another woman? That's illogical."

"How can a man date a woman? Who made it a rule"? I argued back.

"Nature. Isn't that why a male and a female are always paired together"? My mother asked.

"Is a relationship just about producing babies. If so, then why marry? Just keep producing babies like some factory. Sell 'em to the highest bidders maybe, like one of your auctions. Sell me too, cause I wanna be who I am"! I argued intensively.

"Jake! Don't you ever say things like that!" She scolded me. "You are my baby, and you will stay with me" She glared at me. "I love you son"

"Then why can't you accept me"? I asked her.

"Because it's wrong," She pressed.

"So, you would rather me be miserable, than me being 'wrong'." I scoffed.

"Why would you be miserable? You like girls too right? Isn't that what bisexual means? You can keep dating girls and keep blending into the society" She countered.

"Yes… maybe. But that would be a lie" I mumbled. "I don't want to lie about who I am. It doesn't matter if I am dating a boy, or a girl. I will always be bisexual. That's who I am. It's not about who I date. It's who I am. That's the whole point". I explained.

"Son-" She was about to say something but I cut her off.

"Leave it mom. We can keep arguing, and neither of us will convince the other of their point. Just because you are being nice about it, doesn't mean what you are implying is nice. It hurts me, to see that my mother can't accept my happiness. It is another thing that makes me unhappy.

"I am thinking about your happiness, son. I am just trying to make things less complicated for you" she sighed. 

"Life is messy mom. I don't want you to make it easy for me. I just want you to support me no matter how complicated it gets. To stand by me. But… Why bother. Deep down you'll always loathe me for who I am" I mumbled.

"That's not true son, I'll always love you" She whispered. 

"Even if I bring home a guy and tell you I'll be marrying him"

".." She opened her mouth but nothing came out. She took a deep breath and said, "Look son, I don't understand this. Relationships between the same sex is something I never understood. But if you do something that makes you happy, go for it, ``"my mother nodded. "I will not be comfortable, but I won't be against you either" mumbled my mother.

"Really?" I blinked at her. Did she just.. Say she might accept me eventually?

"Of course. I love you son, and I'll always have your back. That's how love works" She smiled at me. I reciprocated her smile and jumped at her with a multitude of excitement. "When someday, you love someone. Boy or girl, friend, lover or your own kid… make sure to do the same" She rubbed her hand on my back.

I loved my mom, and I have had numerous happy memories of her throughout the years, but this one was my absolute favourite. Who knew that this would not last for long. 

A few weeks later my mom passed away from an accident. My parents were en route to my nana's house when they met with a terrible accident. My dad barely survived, but he lost one of his kidneys in the impact. My mother however succumbed to death on the spot before they could be salvaged.

Imagine me, a young boy who just lost his mother is also on the verge of losing his father. I didn't know what to feel. I was gonna be an orphan soon.

I was happy, when he survived, until I saw his cold expression towards me. He seldom smiled at me, which seemed appropriate as always being a constant absence from my life. But that cold expression, that was about to be my whole life. The way he looked at me as if he regretted having me for his son. Soon I realised that even though he did make it back. I did lose everything in that accident.

I remember when we had a parent teacher meeting at school. My mother was the one to attend, but being a child without his mom. I turned to Dad. Guess who showed up? Mr Thompson. Ever since then he kind of became my surrogate parent. The substitute for a Dad who was as good as dead.

I guess somehow he too felt the same towards me. Like I was dead to him. He only talked to me with purpose, and it was always something that was imposing on me. Like an order. And I had no other option, no other choice than to believe him. 

Never had I ever had the guts to stand up to him. Deep down I was afraid to be more of a disappointment than I already was. Maybe that's why I had a charming personality, a deep down hunger to be liked. I have always been like that, for as long as I can remember… until I met Linda.