I was just fishing, how did I become a Great Old One?

Spacetime rift, the thirteenth dimension, the outer edge of the abyss.

When the Treant (World Tree Ark), carrying the god-level [Perpetual Motion Core], roared into the stargate leading to the "Abyss Kitchen," everyone envisioned a scene of raging fire and inferno, or some indescribable horror.

But reality dealt them a heavy blow.

Or rather, it was a "greasy, blunt blow".

"Cough cough cough..."

As soon as he crossed the membrane, Er Gou began to cough violently, with tears and snot streaming down his face.

"Woof! This air...why does it feel so sticky?"

"And...it stinks! It smells like the stale grease from a range hood that hasn't been cleaned in centuries!"

Not only Er Gou, but even Sun Wukong frowned and waved his hand in the air.

"really."

Wukong opened his palm, and a thin layer of dark oil had condensed on his palm.

"The air here isn't filled with dust, it's filled with oil."

Jiang Li stood in front of the cockpit, looking out the window with a solemn expression.

The gravity here is incredibly strong, as if the entire world is enveloped in a thick layer of grease. The sky is a hazy yellow, with no sun, only a dark red halo peeking through the clouds, like a giant, rusty oven light bulb.

The land was a boundless black swamp.

Bubbles rose from the swamp, and each bursting bubble released a visible plume of yellow smoke.

There are no plants here.

Or rather, the plant grows in a very strange way.

In the distance were some huge, withered trees, their trunks resembling twisted intestines, and their leaves resembling greasy, black fungus-like objects.

[System notification: Arrived in the new world—Abyssal Kitchen (Outer Zone).]

[Current Environment: Heavily oily and polluted environment / Extremely high cholesterol level.]

[WARNING! Trace amounts of "lethal ingredient" are present in the air. Prolonged inhalation may lead to loss of taste, decreased sanity, and... becoming food.]

……

"Everyone be careful."

Jiang Li activated the [Scent Purification Field] of the Gluttony Godhood, isolating the suffocating smell of cooking oil outside the Ark.

"This is the lowest level of the Abyss Kitchen—the [Heavy Oil Swamp]."

"That is, the legendary... sewers."

"All the waste, dumped, and even leftover scraps from the abyssal feast flow here."

"This ecosystem was formed after hundreds of millions of years of fermentation."

"sewer?!"

Nezha disdainfully lifted his foot, looking at his brand-new Wind Fire Wheels (which had just been serviced).

"I knew it wouldn't be good!"

"What treasures could there be in a place like this? Nothing but garbage!"

"uncertain."

Tang Sanzang (the cyber monk) pushed up his data sunglasses, lines of analysis code flashing in his eyes.

"Amitabha."

"The lotus rises from the mud, yet remains unstained."

"In the dirtiest places, often grows the most exquisite... delicacies (though they may be poisonous)."

……

"Boom—"

Just as everyone was discussing, the engine of the Treant suddenly emitted a muffled, strange noise.

Immediately afterwards, the newly installed "Perpetual Motion Core"... froze.

The ark lost its levitation and began to slowly sink.

"What's going on?!" Jiang Li exclaimed in shock.

"Boss!"

Alice (in liquid metal form) sounded somewhat anxious.

"The air here is so viscous!"

"Oil particles in the air are clogging the air intake!"

"And...this swamp has suction! It's like...thickened soup!"

"Pfft—"

The Treant's massive hull crashed heavily into the black swamp below.

There was no explosion.

Instead, it emitted a tooth-grinding, sticky... "gurgling" sound.

Half of the boat was instantly swallowed up by black mud (old oil).

……

"Looks like this place is giving us a taste of our own medicine."

Jiang Li gave a bitter smile.

"Although perpetual motion machines have unlimited power, they are also susceptible to... oil clogging."

"Everyone get off the bus!"

"We need to tow the boat out first, and then find a place to clean the engine."

Left with no other choice, the group had to leave the comfort of the ark and step into this repulsive land.

The feel underfoot was terrible.

It's soft and slippery, and it takes a lot of effort to pull your feet out with each step, leaving behind a long trail of stringy black mud.

"Ouch!"

Er Gou slipped and fell flat on his face.

"Ptooey! It's so bitter! So astringent! And why does this mud smell like...fish?"

……

"Be careful!"

Suddenly, Wukong's ears twitched, and the golden cudgel instantly appeared in his hand.

"There's movement!"

"Underneath the swamp!"

"Glug... Glug..."

Centered on a point 300 meters ahead, the surface of the swamp began to churn violently.

It's like a pot of boiling asphalt.

Followed by.

One by one, black, round, slime-like creatures emerged from the mud.

They are not large, only about the size of a basketball.

But their numbers are extremely large, densely packed, numbering in the tens of thousands.

They have no facial features, only a huge mouth.

Its body is made of translucent black grease, filled with all sorts of random things: broken bones, rusty iron pieces, and even... dentures.

[Monster: Waste Oil Slime]

[Rank: Minion-level (also food-level)]

[Description: Low-level monsters formed from kitchen waste oil and food scraps. They have no intelligence, only the instinct to devour.]

[Characteristics: Extremely viscous, flammable, disgusting but high in calories.]

……

"Slime again?"

Nezha pursed his lips.

"These newbie monsters in the starting village dare to block my way?"

"Watch the fire!"

Nezha opened his mouth and spat out a stream of Samadhi True Fire.

"call--"

Flames shot out, igniting the first few dozen slimes.

"Sizzle—BOOM!!!"

Something unexpected happened.

These slimes not only didn't die, but they also exploded when they came into contact with fire.

They are waste oil, and they ignite easily.

In an instant, the area in front of them turned into a sea of ​​fire.

Burning grease splattered everywhere, landing on Nezha's body, which he couldn't shake off no matter how hard he tried.

"Hot! Hot! Hot!"

Nezha was so anxious that he rolled around on the ground.

"How can I put out this fire?! It's even more persistent than my Samadhi True Fire!"

"Fool!"

Jiang Li quickly swung Occam's Razor, severing the burning patch of ground.

"This is recycled oil!"

"We cannot use water to extinguish it, nor can we use fire!"

"We need to use... blotting paper!"

"Huh? Blotting paper?"

Nezha was stunned.

"We don't have anything like that."

……

"I don't have blotting paper..."

Jiang Li looked at the ever-growing number of waste oil slimes around him.

They seemed to be drawn by the firelight and began to surge in like a tide.

"Then let's use... bread."

"bread?"

Wukong was also stunned.

"Cook, are you starving?"

"Bread crumbs can absorb oil."

Jiang Li's eyes narrowed.

"Nezha! Stop breathing fire!"

"Use your Qiankun Ring! Make it bigger! Use it as a millstone!"

"Great Sage! Pluck his feathers!"

"Conjure... a steamed bun!"

"Huh? Turned into steamed buns?"

Although Wukong was puzzled, he still plucked a handful of hairs and blew a breath of immortal energy into them.

"Change!"

Bang bang bang!

Hundreds of huge, white steamed buns fell from the sky and landed in the swamp.

"Nezha! Smash it!"

Although Nezha was completely confused, he still directed the Universe Ring to roll over like a road roller.

"Pfft! Pfft!"

The steamed buns were crushed, turning into crumbs that filled the air.

"Ergou! The wind is rising!"

Er Gou (Chaos Devouring Dog) opened its huge mouth and activated its innate divine power.

"call--"

The strong wind whipped up crumbs of steamed buns, covering the burning oil slimes.

A miraculous scene unfolded.

The originally fierce flames were quickly extinguished upon encountering the bread crumbs.

The sticky slime instantly lost its stickiness after being coated with dry breadcrumbs.

They turned into... [black balls covered in breadcrumbs].

……

"Done."

Jiang Li walked over and picked up a "meatball".

I smelled it.

"Hmm... even though it's waste oil."

"But coating them in breadcrumbs and frying them until golden brown... no, they're oil to begin with."

"It only requires a little treatment."

"It's the best... [fire starter briquettes]."

This minor crisis has been averted.

But it also made everyone realize.

Even the outermost sewers of this Abyss Kitchen follow completely different rules than the outside world.

The monsters here are themselves a kind of... failed dish.

To defeat them, you have to use... the logic of cooking.

……

After clearing out the slimes, the group dragged the Dryad to a slightly drier high ground (which was actually a huge hill made of expired flour).

"Alice, check the engine."

"Ergou, you're in charge of keeping watch."

"The rest of you, come with me to explore the surrounding area."

Jiang Li led Wukong and Tang Sanzang cautiously into the depths of the swamp.

Since there are living organisms (slimes) here, it means there must be an ecosystem nearby.

Or perhaps... a scavenger.

I walked for about a few kilometers.

A dilapidated camp appeared in the black fog ahead.

The camp was surrounded by a fence made of huge fish bones.

Inside were several crooked houses built from huge eggshells and rotten vegetable leaves.

"Is anyone there?"

Wukong lowered his voice.

"It looks like a monster's lair."

"Amitabha."

Tang Sanzang glanced at it.

"This humble monk cannot sense any demonic aura."

"Only...poverty and shabby."

……

The three entered the camp.

The residents here... have very distinctive features.

There were onion-headed creatures with legs, potato-men with forks, and several moldy cheese dwarfs.

They saw Jiang Li and the others, but did not attack.

Instead, they were so frightened that they scattered and fled, hiding inside the eggshell houses.

"Don't be afraid."

Jiang Li raised his hand, trying his best to appear friendly.

"We're just passing through...diners."

"I'd like to ask for directions."

Upon hearing the word "diners".

An older man with a slightly bolder onion-shaped head (who looked like the village chief) timidly poked his head out of the hole.

Its eyes were constantly watering (because it was an onion).

"A...diner?"

"You...aren't you going to eat us?"

"I won't eat it."

Jiang Li shook his head.

"I'm not interested in onions unless I'm using them to stir-fry eggs."

Hearing this, Old Onion Head breathed a sigh of relief and crawled out.

It handed Jiang Li a dirty, foul-smelling parchment.

"If it were a diner..."

"So you must have come for...that, right?"

……

Jiang Li took the parchment.

This is a poster.

It depicts a black, burning skull stove.

And several large, bloody words (written in the language of the Abyss):

The 666th Abyss Dark Cuisine Competition (Preliminary Rounds)

【The Dark Cuisine Tournament】

[Organizer: Unnamed Chef Harpy.]

[Champion's Reward:]

1. The title of "Master Chef of the Abyss" (allows one to command all demons).

2. [A legendary kitchen utensil] One piece.

3. One "All-Purpose Ingredient Wish Coupon".

[Registration Location: 500 li ahead, Iron Wok City.]

[Note: Participants are solely responsible for their own survival. The fate of the losers... will become ingredients for the next round.]

……

"A bizarre cooking competition?"

Jiang Li's eyes lit up.

It was terrifyingly bright.

He has participated in countless competitions throughout his life (including his previous life).

Fishing competitions, racing competitions, even competitions to save the world.

The only thing I've never participated in...

A proper cooking competition.

"interesting."

Jiang Li licked his lips.

"Legendary kitchen utensils...all-purpose ingredients..."

"It seems this place is a bit dirty."

"But there are plenty of opportunities."

He looked at the old onion-headed man.

"Old man."

"How do I get to this Black Iron Pot City?"

Old Onion Head pointed to the even denser black clouds to the north.

"Follow the oil river."

"but……"

It hesitated for a moment, but still gave the reminder.

"That's... where the great demons reside."

"You guys look so healthy and fair-skinned..."

"If I go, I'm afraid I'll get... cooked."

……

"Put it in the pot?"

Jiang Li smiled.

He glanced back at Wukong and Tang Sanzang behind him.

"In this world."

"A cook who can put us in the pot..."

"Not even born yet."

Jiang Li put away the poster that reeked of a foul odor.

"Walk."

"Go back and repair the ship."

"We need to... register."

"Starting today."

"We need to give this abyssal kitchen..."

"A tiny bit... a culinary sensation on Earth."