I was just fishing, how did I become a Great Old One?

The night was deep and still, the moon was dark and the wind was high.

Outside Villa No. 13 in Yulong Bay, on the winding road, several armored personnel carriers, all black and without any license plates, silently stopped in the shadows of the woods.

The car door opened, and a group of fully armed soldiers filed out.

They wore streamlined exoskeleton powered armor, their faces were covered by full-face tactical helmets, and they held heavy energy rifles that emitted a faint blue glow.

This is the Black Tower organization's ace unit—the "Purgers" squad.

They are not ordinary mercenaries, but super soldiers who have undergone mechanical modification and genetic enhancement, specializing in retrieving forbidden technologies that have been scattered abroad, and... erasing all witnesses.

"Target confirmed: No. 13, Royal Dragon Bay".

Captain Zero's voice crackled through the communication channel, cold and mechanical: "Intelligence indicates the target is extremely dangerous, possessing the ability to manipulate lightning and some unknown spatial ability. Furthermore, high-energy reactions are detected around the target's residence, suggesting the deployment of a large-scale defensive array."

"Operation Plan: Group A will launch a feint attack from the front to draw enemy fire; Group B will activate the 'Phase Shuttle' to infiltrate the interior and retrieve the Mi-Go Technology Core (that brain); Group C will set up the 'Gravity Collapse Cannon,' which, in the event of uncontrollable resistance, will raze the entire villa to the ground!"

"receive!"

"action!"

The twenty cleaners dispersed like ghosts, taking advantage of the cover of night to sneak towards Villa No. 13.

……

Inside the villa at this moment.

Jiang Li did not sleep.

He was wearing his pajamas, sitting on the living room carpet, counting money with Big Yellow.

That's right, it's counting money.

Although most of his money was in his bank account, Jiang Li still habitually brought back a bag of cash (the change he had just received from Fatty Wang), enjoying the thrill of counting money until his hands cramped.

"Ten thousand, twenty thousand, thirty thousand..."

Jiang Li was counting with great interest when she said, "Big Yellow, stop messing around! You can't eat that coin!"

Big Yellow lay down beside him, listlessly fiddling with a gold coin with its paw.

Suddenly, its ears twitched.

"Woof?" (Someone's here? Lots of tin cans?)

Big Yellow raised its head and looked out the window, a hint of disdain flashing in its dog eyes.

A group of weaklings, encased in sheet metal, are sneaking around climbing over a wall, carrying some glowing fire sticks.

"Huh? Someone's here?"

Jiang Li stopped what she was doing. "Who could it be so late?"

He stood up, walked to the French windows, and looked outside.

Upon closer inspection, they saw several figures dressed in "high-tech gear" crouching and moving forward on the lawn in the courtyard.

"Holy crap? This outfit..."

Jiang Li was taken aback. "Is this... a Star Wars fan club? Or are they here to film a movie?"

In his eyes, the so-called exoskeleton armor was just a well-made cosplay costume, and the energy gun in his hand was just a toy gun with LED lights.

"Wait a minute, how did they film a movie in my yard? They didn't pay the location fee!"

Jiang Li frowned.

Moreover, this group of people were acting suspiciously and didn't seem like good people.

"Could it be... a thief?"

Jiang Li suddenly realized, "Good heavens! Are thieves these days so desperate? They even bought a special set of equipment just to steal things? Are they planning to disguise themselves as a futuristic soldier and say they've traveled from the future?"

"Are you taking advantage of my lack of education?"

Jiang Li was furious.

He had just bought a new house and had a new home when these thieves dared to come to his door. This was a slap in the face to him!

"Big Yellow! Stop counting the money! We have a job to do!"

Jiang Li grabbed a broom from behind the door (it was the broom he used to sweep the fallen leaves in the yard, but it was actually a branch of the Abyss Demon Tree) and was about to rush out aggressively.

……

yard.

The cleaning team A had just climbed over the wall and hadn't even taken two steps when they sensed something was wrong.

"Buzz buzz buzz—Warning! Gravity anomaly! Gravity anomaly!"

The alarm inside the helmet was blaring wildly.

They felt their exoskeleton armor suddenly become incredibly heavy, their once light steps became extremely arduous, and each step consumed a tremendous amount of energy.

"What happened? Is there a problem with the power system?"

"No! The gravity has changed! The gravity here... is ten times stronger than outside?!"

The team members were horrified to find that their knees were trembling and the joints of their armor were creaking under the strain.

In the very center of the courtyard, the pitch-black Star Pillar (flagpole) emanated invisible black ripples, ruthlessly suppressing all intruders.

"Damn it! Is this the large-scale defensive formation mentioned in the intelligence?"

Zero gritted his teeth, "Full power output! Activate the anti-gravity engine! Force a charge!"

"Buzz—"

The thrusters behind the cleaners spewed blue flames in an attempt to counteract the terrifying gravity.

Just then.

"Click".

The villa's gate opened.

A young man wearing SpongeBob SquarePants pajamas and holding a broom came out.

"Hey! You guys in those metal suits! What are you doing?!"

Jiang Li stood on the steps and shouted loudly.

"Why are you out in my yard in the middle of the night, cosplaying instead of sleeping? And with a jetpack? Can you afford to pay for the damage to your lawn?"

The cleaners were stunned.

SpongeBob SquarePants pajamas? A broom?

Is this the extremely dangerous target?

"Target located! Confirmed to be codename 'Chef'!"

Zero's eyes turned cold. "Dead or alive! Open fire!"

"Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh!"

More than a dozen high-energy laser beams shot toward Jiang Li in an instant.

This laser is powerful enough to slice through a tank's armor in an instant, but in Jiang Li's eyes...

"Holy crap! Shining a laser pointer at me? Don't they know that can damage your retina?!"

Jiang Li subconsciously raised the broom in his hand to block it.

"Sizzle—"

The laser beam hitting the broom (the magic tree branch) was deflected like water from a water gun hitting an umbrella.

Several lasers shot into the sky, and several lasers struck the ground, burning several black holes in the lawn.

"My lawn!!!"

Jiang cried out in pain.

This is imported turf that he paid a lot of money to lay!

"You bunch of brats! You think I'm easy to bully if I don't teach you a lesson?!"

Jiang Li's anger level instantly reached its maximum.

He pushed off with his feet and rushed into the crowd as if he had teleported.

"Snapped!"

A broom struck a cleaner's helmet.

"when--!!!"

The seemingly indestructible titanium alloy tactical helmet was flattened by the broom, and the soldier inside was knocked unconscious without even uttering a sound, collapsing to the ground like an iron barrel.

"I'll let you take my picture!"

"Snapped!"

Another swipe of the broom sent another cleaner, who was about to launch a miniature missile, flying and hanging from a nearby tree.

"Serves you right for stepping on my lawn!"

Jiang Li was playing whack-a-mole, wiping them off one by one with a broom. Those so-called elite warriors were utterly powerless against him.

Their movements were as slow as snails in Jiang Li's eyes (due to the suppression of gravity), and their attacks were as soft as cotton in Jiang Li's eyes (due to rule immunity).

"Damn it! Melee team, hold on! Team C! Fire! Use the gravity collapse cannons!"

Seeing the situation was dire, Zero, who was in the distance, immediately issued a destruction order.

Outside the courtyard wall, two cleaners set up an exaggeratedly designed heavy cannon, with black orbs of light condensing at its muzzle.

"boom--"

A black gravity bomb was fired at Jiang Li.

"Oh? Fireworks?"

Jiang Li looked at the black ball flying towards him and thought it was some kind of new type of firework.

"Setting off fireworks so late at night is disturbing the neighbors!"

He stretched out his left hand and caught the gravity bomb, which was powerful enough to create a small black hole, as if catching a basketball.

"Squeak squeak squeak—"

The bomb spun wildly in his hand, attempting to release gravitational waves and suck in everything around it.

But in Jiang Li's palm, it was like a squeezed ball that couldn't be broken no matter what.

"These fireworks are subpar, a dud?"

Jiang Li shook the black ball in his hand. "The workmanship is quite solid, and it's quite heavy."

He looked at the two "accomplices" setting up cannons outside the wall.

"Since you like putting them away, then we'll give them back to you!"

Jiang Li swung his arm in a wide arc and threw the gravity bomb back like a shot put.

"Here comes the kicker! I'll give you a good one!"

"Oh no! Run!!!"

The two cleaners outside the wall were so terrified that they abandoned their cannons and ran away.

"BOOM—!!!"

The bomb exploded behind them.

There was no firelight, only a distortion of space.

The trees, walls, and even the expensive heavy cannon within a ten-meter radius were instantly sucked into a tiny dot and then completely disappeared.

"Wow! This firework... why isn't it making any noise? Or is it just a vacuum cleaner?"

Jiang Li stared blankly at the huge crater that had appeared out of nowhere.

"This power... is a bit like a strong herbicide; it even wipes out the soil."

He shook his head, expressing his bewilderment at this "high-tech product."

By this time, the fighting in the courtyard had ended.

More than a dozen cleaners lay sprawled on the ground, some knocked unconscious by brooms, others paralyzed and unable to move after their power systems were damaged by the large yellow dog.

Captain Zero was currently being pinned down by Big Yellow's claws, his helmet cracked from being trampled.

"Woof!" (Boss, this canned meat is too tough and doesn't taste good, but I can smell batteries inside.)

Big Yellow was drooling over Zero's powered backpack.

"Don't eat indiscriminately! Beware of heavy metal poisoning!"

Jiang Li walked over and poked Zero with a broom.

"Hey, stop playing dead. Tell me, which circus are you from? Or which cosplay club? Coming to my house in the middle of the night and causing damage, you'd better pay up!"

Zero: "..."

Through the cracked mask, he looked at the man in the SpongeBob SquarePants pajamas, and his heart was filled with despair.

Is this the skill of the one codenamed "Chef"?

Catching a gravity bomb with bare hands? Destroying an exoskeleton with a broom?

This isn't human! This is a humanoid Gundam!

"We...we are..." Zero gritted his teeth, trying to activate the self-destruct program.

"Snapped!"

Jiang Li slapped him on the back of the head.

"Why are you stammering? I'm asking you a question! Are you trying to renege on your promise?"

This slap directly short-circuited the self-destruct chip in Zero's brain.

"I...I'm from the Black Tower..."

"Black Tower? What Black Tower? A coal-selling tower?"

Jiang Li frowned. "Are all coal mine owners this arrogant nowadays? Organizing team building activities for their employees in the middle of the night and even trespassing on private property?"

He glanced at the equipment these people were wearing.

Although he saw it as a prop costume, it definitely felt like metal and was well-made.

"Looks like you guys spent a lot of money on these props. No wonder you're out stealing to recoup your costs."

Jiang Li sighed, with an expression that said, "I understand you all."

"Alright, now that I've caught you, you're not getting away. Perfect, I need a few more security guards here."

He pointed at the group, "Look at your physiques. You might be a bit clumsy in your metal suits, but at least you're tough enough to take a beating. From today onwards, you're the security team for my 'Deep Blue Seafood'!"

"Hey you, you're the team leader, right? From now on, you're the security team leader! Employee number 007!"

Zero: "..."

Security guard? 007?

They are the Black Tower's elite purgers! A killing machine that makes the world tremble!

How did I become a security guard?!

"What? You don't want to?"

Jiang Li's eyes turned cold, and he slightly raised the broom in his hand, which still had a few withered leaves stuck to it, but in Zero's eyes, it was simply the Grim Reaper's scythe.

"I'm willing...I'm willing..."

Zero nodded in humiliation.

Only by staying alive can one have the opportunity to transmit intelligence and... seek revenge (or switch sides).

"That's more like it! Er Gou! Come out and greet the customer... no, I mean, greet the new colleague!"

Jiang Li shouted into the house.

……

The next day, at Deep Blue Seafood Restaurant.

Two rows of security guards in strange uniforms appeared at the entrance.

They were wearing tattered exoskeleton armor (damaged by Jiang Li and not yet repaired), oversized security guard uniforms, and carrying modified energy guns (forcibly converted into stun guns by Jiang Li).

Although it looks a bit comical, the chilling aura it exudes is undeniable.

Welcome!

Whenever a guest enters, this group of former super soldiers bows in unison, their voices booming.

The guests were all stunned.

"Is this the kind of prestige Shenlan Seafood Restaurant has? Even the security guards are so cyberpunk?"

"I heard this is the latest performance art, called 'Wasteland-Style Security'."

"That's so cool! I want to hire security guards like that someday!"

Business is booming.

In the kitchen.

Jiang Li is trying to persuade the "smart speaker" (Mi-Go Brain) to change its mindset.

"Xiaodu, look, we have more people now and our business has grown bigger, so we need to pay more attention to security issues."

Jiang Li patted the glass cylinder. "Since you're a high-tech product, could you upgrade our front door? Like, add facial recognition or an automatic alarm?"

brain:"……"

Looking at the group of Black Tower warriors outside, who were being treated as security guards, it felt a deep sense of sorrow, like the plight of a rabbit mourning the death of a fox.

Even the people of the Black Tower have been captured and forced into hard labor, so what reason does this alien scientist have to refuse?

"Sizzle... It works..."

The brain emitted an electronic voice, "I can hack... no, I can connect to their armored systems and transform them into... a smart security network."

"Furthermore... I can utilize the energy field (lightning domain) here to construct a... biometric defense system."

"Wow! So professional?"

Jiang Li chuckled, "Alright! It's up to you then! If you do a good job, I'll get you a bigger fish tank and add a couple of colored lights!"

Brain: "...Thank...thank you, boss."

……

So, in the following days...

Some subtle changes have occurred at Villa No. 13 in Royal Bay.

Those surveillance cameras, which were originally just for decoration, suddenly lit up with red lights, like living eyes, staring intently at everyone who approached.

The electronic lock on the gate has been modified into a biomass structure that can only be opened by people whose genetic information has been recorded. Anyone who tries to force the gate open will be instantly carbonized by high-voltage electricity.

Even under the lawn in the yard, there were induction mines (actually plasma mines).

The entire villa was transformed into a heavily armed fortress.

The core controller of this system is the "Mi-Go Brain," which is placed on the coffee table in the living room and forced to listen to Jiang Xiaoyu's stories every day.

"Beep—Unidentified creature detected approaching."

Late at night, my brain suddenly sounded an alarm.

"Scanning... Target energy level: S-class... Identity confirmed: Black Tower Supreme Executive Officer"

Threat Level: Extremely High

"Calculating response plans..."

"Option A: Activate all defensive weapons (30% win rate)."

"Option B: Wake up Big Yellow (99% success rate)."

"Option C: Wake up that terrifying man (1000% win rate)"

My mind went blank for a moment.

"Implementation Plan C".

"Beep beep beep! Wake up! Wake up! The sun's already high in the sky!"

A piercing alarm clock rang out beside Jiang Li's bed.

Jiang Li sat up abruptly, looking grumpy from just waking up.

"Damn it! This crappy speaker is acting up again? What time is it?!"

He grabbed a pillow, intending to smash it.

"Beep—Someone's delivering a package to the door! It's a large item!"

The brain cleverly changed the wording.

"express delivery?"

Upon hearing this, Jiang Li's anger subsided by half.

"A package being delivered in the middle of the night? Could it be that the 'fully automatic fish-killing machine' I ordered has arrived?"

He jumped out of bed, put on his clothes, and ran downstairs excitedly.

……

At the entrance of the villa.

A middle-aged man in a black trench coat and gold-rimmed glasses, with a refined and scholarly air, was standing there.

His name is "Doctor," the number two figure in the Black Tower organization, and an S-class mechanical ascendant.

He's here today to investigate the reason for the disappearance of the Cleaners team, and incidentally... to retrieve that Mi Goh brain.

"The defense system here... is quite interesting."

The doctor pushed up his glasses, looking at the cannons that were automatically aiming at him, a hint of disdain flashing in his eyes.

"A trivial skill."

He raised his hand, his fingers transforming into sophisticated mechanical interfaces, ready to hack directly into the system.

Just then, the door opened.

Jiang Li came out wearing pajamas and flip-flops.

"Hey? Deliveryman? What are you doing here?"

Jiang Li stared at the refined-looking man for a moment, then paused, stunned.

"Where's my fish-killing machine? I can't find it!"

PhD:"……"

Fish-killing machine?

He stared at Jiang Li, his eyes flashing with data as he tried to analyze the man's combat prowess.

[Target: Unknown. Energy response: 0. Threat level: Incalculable.]

[Warning! Warning! Intuition module alert! Immediate evacuation recommended!]

The doctor's mechanical heart suddenly stopped beating for a beat.

As an S-class powerhouse, he trusted his intuition.

This man... is dangerous!

"Ahem, excuse me, wrong door."

The doctor withdrew his hand with a perfectly professional smile.

"I'm...an insurance salesman."

"Insurance?"

Jiang Li's face darkened.

"Selling insurance in the middle of the night? Are you crazy? Get lost!"

"Okay."

The doctor turned and left, so decisively and cleanly, without even looking back.

He stopped after walking several hundred meters and wiped the oil (cold sweat) seeping from his forehead.

"That was terrifying... Just a moment ago, I felt like if I dared to move even slightly, I would be torn to pieces."

"This mission... must be reassessed! No, it must be abandoned!"

"The Cleaners squad... let's just consider them as his security guards."

The doctor made the most rational decision: he bought a standing ticket and fled Jianghai City overnight.