"I couldn't help your maternal family back then, and I didn't bring your mother back safely. It's understandable that you resent me."
Hearing Wang Laocai bring up the old story again, Wang Yanning paused in her soup-drinking motion, her fingers gripping the spoon slightly tighter. Madam Wang's face also paled, her hand holding the food hovering in mid-air.
That old man is really something. Ning'er came back today, and we finally had a happy meal together, but after he took a couple of sips of his drink, he had to bring up this old story. Why is he looking for trouble?
But Wang Laocai was completely oblivious and continued, "But Ning'er, I have no choice. So many people in the clan are watching, and I can't ignore what my uncles and elders say."
Your mother is the most reasonable person. She knows your father's difficulties. Later, we thought of secretly sending some money, but who would have thought that...
He couldn't continue; his eyes were red-rimmed and his voice choked with emotion.
"Master," Madam Wang hurriedly interrupted him, her voice pleading, "It's all in the past. Today is a joyous day, let's not talk about it anymore, let's not talk about it anymore..."
Wang Yanning slowly put down his spoon. "I understand Father's difficulties, and I have already let them go."
When Wang Laocai heard his son say, "Your son has already let it go," he was first stunned, then his eyes lit up with disbelief, like a drowning person grabbing onto a piece of driftwood.
In the past two years, he felt that his son had become increasingly silent and distant from his family. He rarely came home, and even when he did, he was only polite and answered questions with a few words.
He always believed that the thorn in his son's heart was the matter between his mother and his maternal grandparents back then, caused by his incompetence and compromise as a father.
He tried carefully to make amends and show concern, but he could never quite find the right way. Instead, the father and son became more and more like separated by frosted glass—visible but untouchable, unable to feel warmth.
So, listening to Wang Yanning's words, he pressed her urgently, his voice trembling, "Since you've already let go, why can't you just take what your father gave you? Do you think your father would want anything from you? Why are you..."
Why have we remained so distant all these years? Why is he so resistant to his family? Why did you suddenly settle all his previous expenses, give him a large sum of money, and then refuse to accept a single penny from his family?
Judging from his resolute attitude, it was as if he wanted to sever ties with his family.
Wang Yanning did not answer immediately. He raised his eyes, his gaze passing over his father, as if piercing through time, returning to that afternoon two years ago.
At that time, he had just passed the county and prefectural examinations and become a student of the imperial examinations. He was full of vigor and ready to take the provincial examination in one go.
Several elders in the clan, showing concern for his future, hosted a banquet for him. At first, the banquet was filled with congratulations and praise, creating a harmonious atmosphere.
But after a few rounds of drinks, the conversation gradually took a different turn.
Wang Shouye held a wine glass, patted his shoulder, and said earnestly, "Yan Ning, you are the most promising member of our Wang family this generation. The whole clan is looking to you."
When you pass the imperial examinations and become a Xiucai, or even a Juren or Jinshi, it will be a great honor for your family.
"At that time, our Wang family's land and shops may still need your protection, and the future of our clan's children will also depend on your help."
Another uncle chimed in, "That's right. We Wang family members have always valued family unity the most. You haven't been very close to the family all these years, and I have to have a good talk with you about that."
Some things back then were done out of necessity, and the overall situation had to be prioritized.
You're almost of marriageable age now. When the time comes, you should find a virtuous and understanding woman who considers the bigger picture. Once you marry into the Wang family, you must prioritize the interests of your husband's family and the Wang family. Don't be like your mother, back then... cough."
As he spoke, he seemed to realize he had said the wrong thing. He paused, glanced at Wang Laocai, and then vaguely brushed it off.
However, with a soft "clunk," the base of the wine glass in Wang Yanning's hand hit the table, and the smile on his face faded.
Old Wang's expression immediately changed, and he said urgently, "Uncle, why are you saying all this? Let's drink, let's drink!"
But once the conversation started, it was hard to stop.
Another elder stroked his beard and said slowly, "Shouye is right. Yan Ning, I know you've always had some thoughts about this matter, but you are a descendant of the Wang family, connected by blood. Even if the bones are broken, the tendons are still connected."
Your family supports your education and provides you with a place to live. It is only right and your responsibility to repay your family and help your relatives when you achieve something in the future.
Never emulate those who are short-sighted, only concerned with their own future and forgetting their roots; how is that any different from ingratitude?
The words "ungrateful" were like poisoned needles, piercing Wang Yanning's heart.
He looked at these faces, some shrewd, some hypocritical, some arrogant and condescending, and listened to their eloquent pronouncements of family righteousness and responsibility. He then recalled how they had coldly blocked his maternal grandfather's last path to survival under the pretext of the overall interests of the Wang family.
He knew that everyone was just trying to protect themselves back then, so he had gradually let it go over the years. He never expected that they would think this way.
She didn't feel selfish at all; instead, she blamed her mother.
The anger and chill that had been suppressed in his chest for many years, mixed with his self-blame and endless longing and heartache for his mother, suddenly surged up.
The banquet ended unhappily.
Wang Yanning said nothing, but got up to say goodbye, her back stiff.
After returning home, he fell ill with a persistent high fever. In his delirium, he saw his mother's gentle smile and her pale face, and heard the elders' words about prioritizing the greater good and repaying the family.
This illness lasted for nearly two months, causing me to miss the college entrance examination that year.
After recovering from his illness, the first thing he did was to sell the few valuable dowry items left by his mother, carefully calculate the proceeds, including principal and interest, and place them in front of his father.
"Father, this is the proceeds from the sale of Mother's belongings. Over the years, my food, clothing, daily necessities, and education have all come from this. From now on, I owe the Wang family no more debts."
His voice was eerily calm, his face was pale, but his eyes were unusually firm. "From now on, I will walk my own path. There is no need for the family to worry about me, and I ask my father not to make things difficult for me any further."
Looking at her father's completely bewildered and even somewhat aggrieved expression, Wang Yanning felt that the resentment she felt for the past had long been replaced by a deeper weariness.
What's the point of such an argument? He doesn't understand what that seemingly ordinary argument two years ago, those words that were supposed to be about family righteousness and his own well-being, meant to him.
He might have just thought it was a disagreement, but little did he know that those words were like poisoned nails, completely extinguishing the last bit of warmth he had in his heart for his family.
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