Under One Person: The Taoist Priest Descends the Mountain

Xia He swallowed hard, her gaze drifting back to the large wild boar: "Then... remember to roast it for a while longer, until it's crispy on the outside and tender on the inside. Also, when catching the baby wild boars... be quick, don't scare them too much."

Cheng Mo looked at her: "I'm not cruel now?"

Xia He immediately waved her hand, looking completely matter-of-fact: "Oh dear, a piglet can't survive without its mother, you're just being kind~"

Hmph~ Hmph~

Just then, a commotion came from the bushes nearby, and several round little wild boars emerged with grunts. Their small, beady eyes were initially puzzled, but then they saw Cheng Mo's mother, who was motionless in his arms.

The piglets paused for a moment, then let out a sharp squeal, lowered their heads to reveal their still-growing tusks, and desperately thrashed about on their four short legs, charging towards Cheng Mo.

Cheng Mo didn't move an inch, but simply swayed the arm holding the sow slightly, using the boar's body to meet the heads of each piglet.

Bang bang bang!

After a few muffled thuds, the piglets collapsed to the ground, reuniting with their mother.

"Now we have everything." Cheng Mo put the wild boars, big and small, on the ground and began to process them.

After finding a relatively open spot and clearing away the surrounding weeds, Cheng Mo started a fire to roast the pig.

Flames licked at the chunks of meat, dripping oil with a crackling sound, and the aroma quickly filled the air.

"Let me tell you, wild boars are the natural enemy of farmland and crops. We're doing this to rid the people of a scourge," Cheng Mo said while flipping the roasted meat.

"Stop making excuses for yourself. There are no farmlands or crops around here. You're just craving something." Xia He squatted by the fire, her eyes fixed on the pork that was gradually turning golden.

Cheng Mo nodded, readily admitting, "Yes, I'm craving it. This craving is essential for our survival, so for the sake of human survival, we have no choice but to make these pigs suffer."

"Hey, hey, hey, just say what you want to say, why are you sticking your mouth out like that!" Xia He saw Cheng Mo tear off a piece of fragrant, caramelized meat and was about to put it in his mouth, so she hurriedly reached out to snatch it away. "Can you finish this by yourself? Share some with me!"

Cheng Mo raised his hand, and Xia He missed.

She was not convinced and got up to grab it again, and the two began to chase and play around the fire.

……

From behind some bushes not far away, Ding Zihuan nudged Qiu Rang with his elbow: "These two guys probably aren't here for a picnic, are they?"

Qiu Rang stroked his chin, his gaze sweeping back and forth between Cheng Mo and Xia He: "They should be talking about love, they're practically kissing."

Ding Zihuan lowered his voice, his expression somewhat lewd: "Do you think they might do it in broad daylight?"

Qiu Rang rolled his eyes at Ding Zihuan: "Do you think everyone is as shameless as you? Didn't you see there's still a pig being roasted over there?" He sniffed, his Adam's apple bobbing, "Mmm...it smells so good."

Ding Zihuan's eyes lit up with an idea: "Burning trees in the woods is a disaster for the whole forest. Let's go and warn them, and ask for a few pounds of pork as a fine, no problem, right?"

Qiu Rang's eyes lit up, and he patted Ding Zihuan on the shoulder: "That's absolutely no problem. Damn, you're quick-witted, kid. Let's go!"

The two composed themselves and swaggered out from behind the bushes.

Qiu Rang cleared his throat and raised his voice, "Hey, you two young men over there! Don't you know you can't light fires in the forest?"

Cheng Mo and Xia He stopped playing around and turned to look at them at the same time.

Cheng Mo released the roasting stick he was holding, and Xia He immediately took it with delight, hugging the roasted suckling pig on the stick and starting to gnaw on it like a little animal guarding its food.

Ding Zihuan pointed at Xia He: "Hey beautiful, stop eating! Put out the fire first, or you'll have to pay a fine, you know?! I'm talking to you, stop eating!"

Seeing that Xia He ignored him and was only focused on eating meat, he took two steps forward and reached out to snatch the meat stick from Xia He's hand.

Xia He suddenly looked up, glaring angrily. Without thinking, she raised a long leg like lightning and kicked straight at Ding Zihuan's groin!

Ding Ziheng felt a chill run down his spine, a cold sensation shooting from the soles of his feet to the top of his head, and cold sweat instantly broke out.

Cheng Mo reacted quickly, gently pressing down on Xia He's long legs: "Although these two are acting suspiciously and don't seem like good people, and they're eyeing our pork, you can't just leave them without an heir right away."

Xia He's mouth was stuffed full of meat, her cheeks bulging, and she protested indistinctly, "Mmm...&*%￥#!"

Cheng Mo nodded and translated seriously, "Yes, yes, I know they're awful. But you can kick him in the chest, or kick his butt, or slap him, but how could you kick him there? That's so uncivilized."

Qiu Rang and Ding Zihuan looked at each other, wondering how they could understand what was being said.

Ding Zihuan swallowed hard, still shaken, and calmly pulled Qiu Rang to his side, saying, "You two, stop your charade! Tell my brother what's going on!"

Qiu Rang froze, forcing out a sentence through gritted teeth: "You just wait..."

He took a deep breath, regained his composure, and looked at Cheng Mo and the other man: "Who exactly are you two? Why have you come to our Biyou Village territory?"

Cheng Mo's expression shifted to one of sudden realization: "There's a village here? Hey, perfect!"

He pointed to his and Xia He's somewhat dirty clothes, "We've been sleeping in this forest for two nights without showering, we're filthy. Do you two have a bathhouse where you're staying? Can we borrow a place so my classmate and I can take a shower, change our clothes, and get a good night's sleep?"

Pointing to the piglets on the ground, he said, "Consider this pork as payment for the room and board, okay?"

Qiu Rang and Ding Zihuan exchanged a glance, both unsure whether Cheng Mo's words were true or false.

However, upon smelling the fragrant pork, the two of them swallowed hard.

Once they're in the village, these two won't be able to cause any trouble.

Qiu Rang nodded: "Okay. You put out the fire first, and we'll take care of the meat."

Xia He finally finished the roast suckling pig in her hand, swallowed it forcefully, wiped her mouth with her greasy hands, and shouted, "Little Taoist, don't listen to them! These two guys just want to steal our pork!"

Cheng Mo secretly gave Xia He a thumbs up; she acted well in this scene.

Qiu Rang's face hardened: "Hey, how dare you talk like that, little girl? What do you mean by 'stealing pork'? This is a normal transaction!"

Xia He snorted coldly and started counting on her fingers: "Then let me do the math for you. Normal pork is 6.5 yuan per jin (500g), and there are about 250 jin left, which is over 1600 yuan. Let's say 100 yuan per night for lodging, so you still owe me 1500 yuan!"

Qiu Rang was stunned for a moment by this calculation: "..."

Ding Zihuan immediately retorted, "You're not calculating it that way! Our village is the only one within a hundred miles; charging you five hundred yuan for lodging isn't unreasonable, is it?"

Xia He blinked: "...If you're going to try to extort me like this, I have nothing to say, but we're still a little over a thousand yuan short."

Ding Zihuan's mind raced: "Outsiders aren't allowed in our village, so you have to compensate the other villagers, right? Besides, selling a whole pig is different from calculating by weight; a whole pig is only worth a thousand yuan!"

Xia He turned to Cheng Mo, looking aggrieved, "Little Taoist priest, shall we not go in? Let's go back to the city now, they're too greedy!"

Cheng Mo thought to himself, "..." Sis, this part is over.

He looked troubled. "Um... isn't it too far? It's almost dark."

On the other side, Qiu Rang nudged Ding Zihuan with his elbow and whispered, "How about... we give them some more money?"

Ding Zihuan: "..."