I am not a literary giant

Mei Rucheng's words contained an element of intimidation. The high-ranking leader wouldn't make him kneel. Because if the high-ranking leader really lost his temper, kneeling wouldn't help.

In the past, an education bureau chief here made a huge blunder. To the astonishment of everyone, he knelt down before Shen Jianqiu. Shen Jianqiu replied, "What's the use of kneeling? If kneeling were useful, the Qing Dynasty wouldn't have fallen! I don't want to kneel. I want an explanation from you to me and the students' parents!"

Shen Jianqiu was such an extremely twisted person. He was very talented, and he used his talent to torment those around him to the point of near death. He held himself and others to abnormally high standards.

When Gou Yingbiao was still working in the government office, he once handed a document to Shen Jianqiu's secretary at three in the morning. At that time, he asked with a hint of heartache, "Being a secretary to a big leader must be very hard."

The secretary lit a cigarette. In the hazy moonlight, amidst the swirling smoke, he said, "What's so hard about it? I'm used to it. It's the same every day, every night!"

He sensed a deep unease in this guy's words. The scary thing was, because of that unease, he was telling the truth.

Every year, outstanding individuals are selected. The list of those selected each year is never less than sixteen pages long. This list, containing over a thousand names, only briefly lists the names, units, and positions of the selected candidates. Shen Jianqiu reviews it every year.

He would circle the names he thought were problematic on the list in red pen, and next to them, in a beautiful yet menacing handwriting, write, "Wasn't this person given a warning talk last year? What's the reason for choosing him? Let Bureau X tell me!"

During meetings, if a new face appeared, Shen Jianqiu would try to recall the person's name and mention that they had received excellent evaluations at a certain unit in a certain year. He was almost always right. This memory was astonishing, but it also created an immense, inescapable pressure.

Therefore, Gou Yingbiao had no doubt that if the top leader really knew Wang Zixu's name, the scene Mei Rucheng had just fabricated would actually happen. He just didn't know where the top leader had learned Wang Zixu's name.

Wang Zixu remained standing straight, as upright as a flagpole, appearing simple and unassuming, yet Gou Yingbiao found him increasingly unfathomable. His expression changed with astonishing speed; he pulled out the highest-grade cigarette he could find and said with a fawning smile:

"Comrade Wang Zixu, what makes you say such a thing!"

Gou Yingbiao smiled broadly, his smile as warm as spring, but Wang Zixu found it absurd. He held out his hand in refusal: "I don't smoke."

Gou Yingbiao casually put away his cigarette: "What are you talking about resigning for? If you didn't know better, you'd think I forced you to resign! Haha."

He chuckled twice, but no one echoed his words. The silence created an awkward atmosphere. Mei Rucheng and Section Chief Liu offered each other cigarettes, lit them together, and puffed away. Soon, the office was filled with smoke, like a fairyland.

"Gou Yingbiao, some things are nothing until they are weighed, but once they are weighed, they are worth thousands of pounds. I heard what Comrade Wang Zixu just mentioned, such as the gas station and the 'use it where you don't need to run or deliver' policy."

Sweat dripped down Gou Yingbiao's forehead. Mei Rucheng calmly exhaled a puff of smoke, smiling with a mix of self-deprecation and disdain.

"I'm not from the Discipline Inspection Commission, these kinds of things aren't my responsibility. I can't be bothered with your mess. I just want to warn you that some petty corruption cases eventually escalate into serious punishments. I did mentor you, after all, and I don't want to see you on my anti-corruption report."

Although Mei Rucheng's words were unpleasant, they were the most reassuring thing Gou Yingbiao had heard since he entered the office. He finally understood Mei Rucheng's attitude. He was so moved that tears welled up in his eyes.

Wang Zixu felt somewhat detached. He began to feel that things were gradually becoming irrelevant to him. Director Mei wasn't a divine intervention, nor was he a Bao Zheng (a legendary upright judge). He wasn't an Euripides-like savior who had come to uphold justice.

"Director Mei, rest assured, I will definitely handle this matter well." Gou Yingbiao patted his chest and made a promise.

Xu Shichao brought in an ashtray, placed it respectfully on the table, and then respectfully withdrew, gently closing the door behind him before leaving.

Mei Rucheng said, "Keep the door open. It's too stuffy to smoke in the office."

Section Chief Liu then opened the door.

He flicked the ash into the bin: "Before I came here, Xiao Liu told me everything. We're here to support Xiao Wang. Xiao Wang, if you have any thoughts, just tell Director Gou right here. It'll be easier to handle things face to face."

Wang Zixu shook his head: "I still want to resign."

Mei Rucheng glared at him: "Resign from what position? What, are you getting stubborn? Trying to be like Hai Rui who resigned from office?"

The prince opened his mouth slightly, but didn't speak. He really wasn't Hai Rui. He owned 20% of Wen Ai's shares, and his resignation would allow for a seamless takeover, saving him headaches when filing personal documents later.

But this can't be said.

Mei Rucheng looked pained and indignant, as if he were scolding his own nephews and nieces:

"Doing literature isn't about making yourself weak; it's about making yourself stronger. How can you give up when you encounter some darkness? Where isn't there darkness? Do you think the outside world is clean? You think you're Tao Yuanming or Hai Rui? In other people's eyes, you're just running away!"

Section Chief Liu said, "Yes, Brother Wang, if you can make demands, then make them openly. Director Mei has influence here, right? And think about it, when you submit your resignation letter to the Organization Department, the top leaders will read it. If they see your name and ask questions, it might even cause a political storm."

Gou Yingbiao, covered in sweat, said, "Xiao Wang, let's not talk about resigning anymore. I'll do my best to help you get the 'Outstanding' award this year, and I'll also put next year's promotion on the agenda immediately."

He spoke these words through gritted teeth, as if he had bled profusely. When he finally heard these words after so many years, Prince Xu felt a sudden sense of relief.

"I don't want to be outstanding," Wang Zixu said.

Mei Rucheng frowned, turned around and went to the side to smoke.

Gou Yingbiao lowered his voice and said, "Stop throwing a tantrum and making things awkward for everyone in front of Director Mei."

Wang Zixu saw the impatience in Gou Yingbiao's eyes. Gou Yingbiao had never understood him. He thought Wang Zixu's stubbornness was just an attempt to embarrass him.

Over the years, he had given up trying to explain himself to others. People who are not the same kind of people can never understand each other, just as he could not understand how Gou Yingbiao could change his attitude so quickly.

He took a deep breath and said:

"I really don't want to be outstanding. What good will it do me? I'll be 31 next year, a level nine staff member. Even if everything goes smoothly, it will take another 6 years to be promoted to deputy section chief, and another 6 years to become a section chief. By then I'll be 43."

"How much is the salary of a section chief in Xihe? More than six thousand or seven thousand? How much will the housing prices in Xihe be by then? What can this salary do?"

"I've been waiting for this 'excellent' award, not because I wanted a promotion. When I meet my old classmates, they just say to me, 'Why are you still working as a clerk? What can you do with a monthly salary of four thousand yuan?'"

"Even if I get this excellent grade now, when I'm in my forties and run into my old classmates, they'll still say, 'Why are you still only a section chief? What can you do with a monthly salary of seven thousand yuan? Has anything changed? Nothing has changed.'"

"I'm waiting for this 'excellence' not because I want a promotion. I just want to put a beautiful end to my past life, to use this ending to comfort my past self, and to tell him, 'Wang Zixu, your past choices were not wrong. You are actually very excellent.'"

"But I waited nine years for this ending. It's too late. I can't console myself that I failed to live up to the sacrifices of the past. I'm not a good person; I'm a stubborn, persistent person. But thankfully, I like myself."

Gou Yingbiao was stunned for a long time, then gritted his teeth and asked, "Then just tell me, what do you want in order to stop threatening to resign? Do we really have to make things worse?"

Prince Xu said, "I want you to apologize to me."

Mei Rucheng exhaled a long puff of smoke, the bluish smoke rings drifting and rising to the ceiling. His eyes were slightly moved, as if he felt a sense of resonance, but in the end he said nothing.

As a man in his fifties, Wang Zixu is like a mirror in some ways. He sees himself reflected in him and finds it difficult to judge his behavior and character, just as he doesn't know what kind of life he would lead if he took a different path.

He made a judgment in his heart: someone like Wang Zixu would either fall into obscurity and be forgotten, or suddenly soar to great heights and become known to all. All he could do was squat by the roadside, smoking and silently watching his fate unfold.

Regardless of the ending, it will certainly be highly artistic.