Cangmang Asks the Way 1: Guardian of the Lamp

It was already afternoon when the bus stopped on the dirt road at the entrance of Xiqiao Village. The July sun was blazing, and the dust on the road was baked white. As the wheels rolled over, a cloud of dust rose up.

Su Yumei helped Tianci off the bus. Cang Xiangyang followed behind, carrying the luggage. The doors closed, and the bus rumbled away, its exhaust fumes dissipating in the dust. Someone squatting in the sun by the wall at the village entrance saw them, quickly stood up, and came over, asking with concern about Tianci's situation. Then, they shook their heads and sighed before walking away.

Cang Zhenye was chopping firewood in the yard. He raised the axe halfway and stopped. He saw Su Yumei helping Tianci into the yard. Tianci's eyes were vacant, his face was pale, and he had lost a lot of weight.

He put down the axe and wiped his hands on his trousers. He walked forward, stopped in front of Tianci, and looked at him. Tianci stared at him, his eyes empty, revealing no emotion.

"A gift from heaven," he exclaimed.

Tianci didn't respond, but just stared at him intently. Su Yumei pointed at Cang Zhenye and said, "Tianci, this is your father, quickly call him Dad!"

Cang Tianci obediently called out, "Dad." But the "Dad" sounded empty, without any meaning.

Cang Zhenye already knew about Tianci's situation. Although he was prepared, seeing Tianci like this and remembering the sensible and pitiful child he once knew, a wave of sadness welled up in his eyes.

He fought back tears that threatened to spill over and whispered, "It's good that you're back."

Then he quickly turned around and wiped his eyes with his sleeve.

"I'll go boil some water," he said again, his voice trembling slightly.

After saying this, he walked towards the kitchen. He took a few steps, then stumbled and grabbed the doorframe for support. He straightened up and went into the kitchen. The fire in the stove was still burning. He squatted down and added some firewood. The firelight reflected on his face. Tears glistened on his face, dripping onto the firewood with a hiss, rising in a small puff of white steam before dissipating.

Footsteps echoed in the courtyard. Cang Houde, leaning on his cane, walked over from the old house. He walked slowly, tapping his cane on the ground, one tap, one tap.

Cang Yuanzhi followed behind him. He wore dark gray trousers, the cuffs covering his ankles. When he walked, his left foot landed heavier than his right—it was a prosthesis, the best kind available in 1994. It was Liu Qing who had taken him to Yanjing. He walked with a slight limp when he went fast, but his steps were steady and firm.

When Cang Houde entered the courtyard, Tianci was sitting on the wood-splitting stool. He had his head down, his pocket watch pressed to his ear. Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock. He didn't see Cang Houde.

Cang Houde walked over. The sound of his cane tapping the ground, thud, thud, thud. Tianci looked up at him. His gaze fell on the old man's face, his eyes blank. He didn't know who this kind old man was.

"A gift from heaven." Cang Houde's voice trembled.

Tianci looked at him, his eyes still blank.

Cang Houde stretched out his hand. The hand was withered and thin, with large knuckles and age spots all over the back. His hand stopped beside Tianci's cheek, not falling down, just hanging there, trembling slightly.

"You child..." he said.

He didn't finish speaking. His hand fell, landing on Tianci's face. His palm pressed against his cheek, his thumb gently stroking his cheekbone. The skin there was cool.

"Look at Grandpa," he said.

Tianci looked at him. Seeing the tears glistening in the old man's eyes, he felt a little strange, but mostly bewildered. He didn't understand what was wrong with the old man. He just felt a sense of familiarity and warmth towards him, like the person who had just called him "Dad."

He stared at the old man for a while, then looked away. He moved to the courtyard wall, to the clump of foxtail grass on the top of the wall. The foxtail grass swayed in the wind.

Cang Houde's hand was still pressed against Tianci's face. He didn't move. There seemed to be something glistening in his eyes. He didn't let it fall. He withdrew his hand, leaned on his cane, and sat down on the stone stool next to Tianci. The cane rested against his knees. He looked at Tianci. Tianci looked away.

Cang Yuanzhi and his wife, along with Cang Shouzheng and his son, stood aside silently watching this scene, their noses stinging with tears.

Soon after, Cang Jianguo and his family arrived. They put down their gifts and offered words of comfort to Cang Zhenye and Su Yumei.

After that, some villagers who were usually on good terms with us came over. They brought some gifts, said some words of comfort, and then left.

As evening fell, Wang Zhenkun's younger brother, Wang Zhikun, the current deputy mayor of Futian Township, entered the Cang family's mud-brick house. He was wearing a white polyester shirt, the collar neatly buttoned. He carried gifts such as malted milk powder and canned fruit.

The courtyard fell silent for a moment. Cang Yuanzhi, who was sitting next to Tianci, stood up when he saw him. Cang Houde did not move; he remained seated on the stone stool, his cane resting against his knees.

"Mayor Wang," Cang Yuanzhi greeted him.

"Brother Yuanzhi," Wang Zhikun extended his hand, "I've come to see the child."

Cang Yuanzhi grasped that hand, squeezed it briefly, and then released it. "You're too kind."

He ushered Wang Zhikun into the courtyard. Wang Zhikun walked up to Tianci. He looked at the boy—wearing ill-fitting sportswear, his hair freshly shaved, and an old pocket watch hanging around his neck. The watch ticked softly, but everyone in the quiet courtyard could hear it.

Tianci raised his head and looked at him. His gaze lingered on his face for a moment, then moved away.

Wang Zhikun stood there for a while. He put down what he was holding, next to the pile of red dates and eggs. Then he straightened up, turned to Cang Houde, and respectfully greeted him, "Uncle Cang."

Cang Houde looked at him and nodded. The cane remained resting against his knee, unmoved.

"It's good that the child is back," Wang Zhikun said. "The township is also very concerned. If there are any difficulties, you can talk to the township."

He paused, then looked at Cang Houde's face again and said sincerely, "Uncle Cang, about my brother's matter... I've come to apologize on his behalf."

Cang Houde looked at him and said, "It's all in the past."

Wang Zhikun nodded. He didn't say anything more. He glanced at Tianci again. Tianci had his head down, his pocket watch pressed to his ear. Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock. It was the most steady sound in the courtyard.

"Then I won't bother you any longer," Wang Zhikun said.

Cang Yuanzhi escorted him to the gate of the courtyard.

Cang Yuanzhi returned to the courtyard, picked up the bag of things from the stone stool, looked at it, and placed it under the table in the main room. Cang Houde didn't look at those things once from beginning to end.

As darkness fell, the people in the courtyard gradually dispersed. Cang Zhenye brought out dinner from the kitchen—a pot of sweet potato porridge and a dish of pickled vegetables. He served Tianci a bowl and placed it in front of him. Tianci looked at the bowl of porridge for a while, then picked up his chopsticks.

His hands trembled slightly. He picked up a piece of sweet potato with his chopsticks, brought it to his mouth, took a bite, chewed, and swallowed. Then he picked up another piece.

Cang Zhenye looked at him. Su Yumei looked at him. Cang Houde looked at him. Xiang Yang looked at him.

Tianci ate bite by bite. He was unaware that these people were watching him. He was simply eating a bowl of porridge. The sweet potato was sweet, and the porridge was hot. His body remembered all of that.

After dinner, Su Yumei helped him into the main room. The electric light in the main room was on, casting a yellowish glow on the wall and onto a yellowed old newspaper. On the newspaper was the character "人" (person), the strokes of which were faded but still visible.

Tianci walked past the newspaper. His gaze swept across the wall, then over the character for "person," and stopped. Just for a moment. Then he lowered his head and continued walking.

Su Yumei helped him into the bedroom and sat him down on the edge of the bed. She took off his shoes, lifted his legs onto the bed, and pulled a thin blanket over him. Tianci lay down, turned to his side, and held his pocket watch to his ear. Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock.

Su Yumei sat by the bed for a while. She reached out and touched his forehead. It wasn't hot. She withdrew her hand, stood up, walked to the door, and turned off the light.

The room darkened. Only the light in the main room remained on, its yellowish glow seeping in through the crack in the door, drawing a thin line on the floor.

Tianci lay on his side in bed, watching the ray of light. His pocket watch ticked beside his ear. Tick-tock, tick-tock, tick-tock.

He didn't know where he was.

He didn't know who those people who had been watching him were.

He didn't know what was written on the old newspaper on the wall of the main room.

All he knew was that the light was there, flickering on and off—the wind was blowing the curtains in the main room, and the light was swaying accordingly.

He looked at the beam of light.

Looked for a long time.

Then his body moved an inch toward the light. Just an inch. He didn't even realize it.

He gripped the pocket watch tighter and closed his eyes.

Outside the window, the shadow of the locust tree swayed gently in the moonlight. A dog barked once in the distance, then fell silent.