Crazy Nezha

Xincheng is a small third- or fourth-tier city in China, known as the "Jiangnan of the North" and the "North of the South".

Li Tianbao rode a shared bicycle through the bustling streets, passing the well-known Baijiafu Supermarket in Xincheng, and headed west to the entrance of the pedestrian street.

There are many stalls here, including many vendors selling cats and dogs.

"Meow!" "Woof!" "Chirp chirp chirp chirp!" "Third Master! Woof! Third Master, save me!!"

It's the weekend, and the pedestrian street is bustling with adults and children, mostly looking at the cats and dogs, but not buying much.

Li Tianbao heard it! His gaze fell on a husky!

"Young man, want to buy a cat? All of them are 15 yuan each." The vendor, an old lady, greeted him with a smile as she introduced the cats to potential customers.

Li Tianbao parked the shared bicycle next to him. In the largest cage, there was a large adult dog licking its rear end.

"Is that a husky?"

Upon seeing this, the old lady quickly opened the cage. "Yes, this dog is very smart."

"Tsk tsk tsk." Li Tianbao stroked the dog's head. It was indeed of good quality, with three fires.

Husky: "It really is Nezha, the Third Prince! Third Master, it's me, Xiaotian! Take me back to Heaven! This world is too messed up, I don't want to stay here a minute longer!"

Did the Celestial Dog reincarnate as a Husky?

Li Tianbao remained calm and asked, "Boss, how much is this dog?"

"1200!"

"That's too expensive."

"This is a purebred husky. We also have cheaper ones; the local dogs here are 50 yuan each." The old lady kicked a cage next to her feet, inside which was a group of puppies.

Li Tianbao has over 2 yuan in his card! He can afford it!!

"Has this husky been vaccinated?"

The old lady took out the dog's license and vaccination certificate, and said with a smile, "Young man, this dog has been vaccinated and dewormed. It has a certificate. If you really want it, I'll give you 1000 yuan."

The husky, tongue lolling out, was very excited and nudged Li Tianbao's crotch with its head.

"Hey, you two are really destined to be together!" the old lady said with a smile.

A little girl, about eight or nine years old, took out a sausage and said, "Big brother, let me feed you this, it's the King of Kings."

The little girl handed over the sausage, which Li Tianbao took, peeled off, and fed to the dog.

The husky was munching on a sausage, and the little girl was watching with great interest, blinking her big eyes.

The old lady smiled and said, "Look how happily the dog is eating."

Li Tianbao: "This dog looks pretty good, can you give me a discount?"

The old lady said, "1000 yuan is really not expensive."

Li Tianbao: "Then I don't want it."

Old lady: "Then please pay for the sausages."

"..."

The little girl was adorable, and she smiled brightly. "Big brother, don't listen to my grandma's nonsense. This dog is called Harry. If you like it, you can buy it; if you don't, you don't have to pay for the sausage."

Li Tianbao asked curiously, "Is this dog yours?"

The little girl proudly said, "My family has many pets, and my dad owns a pet hospital."

Li Tianbao patted the dog's head, and the husky barked a few times. To Li Tianbao, it sounded like human language: "Third Master, our batch of puppies cost 400! Their bottom line is 600! Are you still willing to haggle?"

Li Tianbao casually asked, "Would 600 be okay?"

The old lady readily agreed, "Deal."

Li Tianbao hesitated for a moment, then changed his mind and asked, "Is 500 okay?"

The old lady gritted her teeth and said in a deep voice, "One price, 550! Post a picture of my stall on your WeChat Moments, saying you bought it for 1500!"

Li Tianbao hesitated; he didn't want to post on his WeChat Moments to scam people for 50 yuan.

The little girl raised her head and said to her grandmother in a deep voice, "Grandma, this isn't right! It's just 550! No need to post it on WeChat Moments! Big brother should stick to his principles!"

The old lady smiled with satisfaction, patted her granddaughter's head, and nodded: "Okay! We'll listen to our little Jixiang!"

Woof! Woof! Woof! The husky circled around Li Tianbao, exclaiming "Holy crap!"

"Young man, 550 yuan! No need to post it on WeChat Moments. You and my granddaughter are both principled and good kids! By the way, cash or QR code?" The old lady took out a QR code payment card.

Li Tianbao felt it was alright, so he took out his phone to scan the QR code...

"Scan here, that's right, okay~" the old lady said with a smile, her eyes squinting.

The little girl also gave him a dog leash and a bag of dog food.

"Go ahead, Harry." The little girl handed the dog leash to the older boy and said, "My nickname is Jixiang. My dad owns a pet hospital. If you have any after-sales issues, go to Tianmei Pet Shop at the roundabout. We also offer pet bathing and grooming services..."

Xiao Jixiang then introduced the services offered by his pet hospital.

Li Tianbao listened quietly, sighing inwardly. Nowadays, eight- or nine-year-old children watch a lot of mobile phones and TV, their thinking is quick, and they understand the truth more.

"Okay, I'll be going now. I wish you great success in your business."

"Yes!" The little girl nodded emphatically.

Li Tianbao led the dog away, and after walking a dozen steps, he looked back and saw the little girl chasing after him with a smile.

"Is there anything else?"

The little girl took out a business card and handed it over: "You can contact my dad for after-sales issues."

Li Tianbao took the business card, glanced at it, and saw the words "Tianmei Pet Hospital" printed on it. He then casually put it in his pocket.

Thank you.

"Goodbye, big brother, I'm going back to do my homework." The little girl ran back to the stall with a joyful expression.

Watching her skip and hop away, Li Tianbao sighed, "What a happy elementary school student!"

The little girl returned to the stall and said in a condescending tone, "Grandma! I sold another one! Give me half an hour to play on my phone!"

……

[Walking on the bustling street, you no longer hold my hand...]

A clothing store by the roadside was playing an old song. The song was called "You're Happier Than Before."

A man and his dog strolled along the old street of Shengli Road in silence for a long time.

[There were things you were hiding from me, but you finally spoke up, saying simply, "We're still friends..."]

Finally, Li Tianbao spoke first: "Your name is Harry, and you're the Celestial Dog?"

The husky barked, "Yes, Third Master, we're old friends. We've even had dinner together before, remember?"

Li Tianbao smiled faintly. "Heh, is this some kind of hallucination?" This dog's voice was completely different from the bass's; it sounded much younger.

The husky sighed, "In my past life I was a divine dog, but now I've been reincarnated as a foreign dog. How pathetic."

Li Tianbao asked, "Do you know Leopard Head?"

"Leopard Head? The electric eel spirit from the East Sea. After being recruited by the Heavenly Court, he serves under the Goddess of Lightning on Penglai East Road. I know him quite well. Where is he?"

Li Tianbao followed up, saying, "Leopard Head is now a bass. He's at my house. He sent me to find you. What's going on? Why do you all say I'm Nezha?"

The husky said, "24 years ago, at the Peach Banquet! You got drunk and went berserk, and were banished to the mortal realm, reincarnated as you are now. You have to cultivate again before you can return to the heavens."

Li Tianbao pursed his lips. "I'm 24 years old this year. The logic makes sense."

Wait, something's not right. Li Tianbao seemed to have realized something and asked seriously:

"You are the Celestial Hound, you should possess magical powers!"

"No!"

"You descended to the mortal realm, so why don't you possess any magical powers?"

The husky was silent for about ten seconds before speaking, "Alas, I also made a mistake... just like you, I was banished to the mortal realm."

In other words, this is an ordinary husky.

"What mistake did you make?"

A tender look appeared in the husky's eyes, and his tone was somewhat sad. "Three years ago, during the Ullambana Festival, I was ordered to maintain stability! There was a Bodhisattva in the Western Paradise who rode a deer, a female deer. I had drunk Shen Gongbao's wine at the time, and I couldn't resist."

Li Tianbao's eyes widened. "What did you do?"

"That bastard Shen Gongbao! He drugged me with aphrodisiacs! I took that doe into the forest..."

Li Tianbao's face stiffened. "Stop talking, I'm begging you."

The husky sighed, "I only found out later that the doe was Manjushri Bodhisattva's new mount. I made a mistake..."

"Three years ago, I was entrusted by the Immortal Taiyi to descend to the mortal realm to help you regain your magical powers. Your master felt sorry for you and feared you would suffer in the mortal world, so he planted a seed in your mind. Once the seed sprouts, you will be able to cultivate magical powers!"

"Third Master, you are different from us. You can cultivate. Once you have magical power, we won't have to suffer anymore."

To passersby, the dog kept barking, which was annoying, but to Li Tianbao, it sounded like human speech.

Li Tianbao raised an eyebrow. "How do I cultivate magical power?"

The husky explained, and it was no different from what the leopard head had said: believe that you are Nezha, and there is a method of cultivation in your mind. But when Li Tianbao tried to believe it, there was still no reaction.

Seeing the complicated expression on his face, the husky roughly guessed the reason and sighed, "I have another way to restore my magic power!"

"What method?"

"Eat spirit beasts!"

"Where are the spirit beasts?"

The husky tilted its head back and said, "Yesterday, a seafood delivery tricycle passed by the pedestrian street entrance. I saw a lot of seafood on the tricycle, including a huge king crab that was glowing white. It's a reincarnated spirit beast; if you eat it, you might regain some of your magical power!"

Li Tianbao was shocked. "If I were really Nezha, with magical powers, what a sight that would be!"

That's illogical. If a king crab could glow, would it be sold in a supermarket? It would be on the news long ago; that would be a biological miracle!

"King crabs glowing white? Aren't people scared?"

The husky explained, "Ordinary people can't see that light, but you can, Prince! I can see it too!"

Li Tianbao nodded, and everything made sense again. "Do you know where that tricycle delivers goods?"

The husky asserted confidently, "There's a 'Baijiafu Delivery' sign on the back of the tricycle!"

Li Tianbao had never eaten king crab before, only seen some mukbang videos of people eating it on his phone, and they always seemed to enjoy it! Well, now that things have come to this, he had to buy some and try it!

"King crabs are very expensive, and few people buy them! They're probably still in supermarkets."

The husky, stirring things up, said, "This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! If we buy it and eat it, you'll have magic powers, and with magic powers, we'll be awesome!"

Why is the Celestial Hound speaking so frivolously? Think about it from another angle: the Heavenly Peach Banquet now serves red wine; times have changed, which makes perfect sense.

Li Tianbao interrupted, "Besides eating spirit beasts, what other way do I have to restore my magical power?"

The husky said, "The best way is for you to believe that you are Nezha! There is a method of cultivation within your mind! Unfortunately, you still don't believe it deep down, so there's nothing I can do."

Li Tianbao arrived at the crossroads and remained silent.

Because there were passersby nearby, Li Tianbao, being a man of principle, was concerned about his reputation! After all, talking to a dog is quite unusual.

The green light was on, and people were coming and going at the zebra crossing. Li Tianbao was leading his dog, and the big dog was running wildly.

"Charge—" The husky was as excited as a wild horse.

As Li Tianbao was being pulled along, he quickly shouted, "Slow down!"

"The light's about to turn red!" the husky complained.

There are seven seconds left on the green light countdown. Does this dog even know how to read traffic lights? Is it real? Or am I just imagining things?

Reaching the other side of the road, Li Tianbao stopped, looked up at the sky, and murmured to himself, "My name is Li Tianbao, my father's name is Li Liqing, put together, it's Li Jing! My mother's name is Yin Guizhi... Nezha's mother was called Lady Yin."

The husky tilted its head back, its eyes sparkling.

Li Tianbao said in a deep voice, "Therefore, I am not mentally ill at all! Your voices are not my hallucinations!"

The husky said firmly, "Third Master, are you mentally ill or Nezha reincarnated? Only you can decide!"