Crazy Nezha

It's 9:30 PM!

The rooftop of Xincheng Mental Hospital.

Under a bright moon and sparse stars, Li Tianbao carried half a dozen beers, with Sun Baoqiang following behind.

Li Tianbao sat down by the railing, pried open two bottles of beer, and handed one to Sun Baoqiang: "Drink!"

Sun Baoqiang took the beer, his eyes showing some hesitation: "Brother Tianbao, people with mental illnesses can't drink."

Do I have a mental illness?

"no."

Do you have it?

"no."

"drink."

Li Tianbao tilted his head back and took a swig. "Ask whatever you want."

Sun Baoqiang remained silent, tilted his head back, and gulped down the entire can of beer.

The two leaned against the railing, drinking in silence.

Sun Baoqiang's Adam's apple bobbed as he gazed at the city lights in the distance. "Brother Tianbao, what does your dad do for a living?"

Li Tianbao proudly said, "My dad is a hero. He works for the Public Security Bureau and is currently cracking down on drugs on the Yunnan-Myanmar border. He's really capable."

Sun Baoqiang: "Your dad is amazing, I really envy you."

For some reason, Li Tianbao suddenly felt like crying and asked seriously, "What does your father do?"

Sun Baoqiang smiled and said, "My dad used to be the manager of Xingyu Internet Cafe. When I was in fifth grade, my dad started playing League of Legends with me, and we played together."

Sun Baoqiang has a very low alcohol tolerance. After drinking a can of beer, his eyes remained glazed over. "Hehe, Brother Tianbao, when I was a kid, I was like a god!"

"My mom was 19 when she had me, and my dad was 16. Isn't that crazy?"

Sun Baoqiang smiled, but the smile was bitter. "When I was in the second year of junior high school, my dad was in a car accident and was paralyzed due to a spinal injury. On May 12th, my mom gave me 50 yuan, and then I didn't know where she went."

Sun Baoqiang's eyes reddened. "I was only fourteen years old then. Every day after school, I would go to the hospital to feed my dad and turn him over..."

The two talked for a long time...

……

Xincheng is famous not only for its Maojian tea, but also for the advanced treatment and management system of Xincheng Mental Hospital.

Dean Yang Yongshi personally oversaw the improvement of the electrotherapy system and invented "Faith-Based Correction of Electrospasm," which is quite famous in the industry.

The hospital has two main areas—the East Zone and the West Zone.

Li Tianbao lives in the East District, which has good facilities but higher hospitalization costs. The treatment mainly focuses on emotional support, with nurses acting as caring older sisters and doctors as gentle older brothers.

In the western district, hospitalization costs are lower, but conditions are worse. Security doors are always locked, and screams can often be heard. Treatment mainly involves electroconvulsive therapy.

12 points in the early hours.

In the east wing of the hospital, a nurse on the night shift was holding her rounds log when she reached the third-floor stairwell and was startled.

Yin Jianshe was live-streaming from the corner of the stairs, wearing a wig. He spoke softly, using a voice changer, and was chatting with a man about relationship issues.

The nurse frowned. "Bed 12, what are you doing?"

Yin Jianshe turned around and saw it was a nurse. He made a shushing gesture and continued the live broadcast.

In the next office, a doctor on duty was watching a drama on his phone when a nurse came in and asked, "Dr. Liu, the patients outside aren't sleeping according to the rules; they're livestreaming in the stairwell, and you're not doing anything about it?"

The doctor on duty said, "Dr. Wang has connections, so there's nothing we can do about it! Besides, this uncle isn't sick; he's just here to keep his nephew company."

Nurse: "He's pretending to be a woman! He's deceiving people's feelings!"

The on-duty doctor said calmly, "Those who watch his livestream are all old men, why are you worrying about it?"

The nurse was speechless for a moment, then said, "Dr. Wang just called and asked me to take a look at Li Tianbao."

The on-duty doctor yawned. "I just checked, and that new young master is meditating in his ward."

The nurse frowned as she walked to ward 307. Through the small window in the door, she saw a young man in a hospital gown sitting cross-legged on the bed, like an old monk in a movie.

Sun Baoqiang was fast asleep next to him.

The on-duty doctor also came out and whispered, "He's been sitting here for over an hour."

The nurse hesitated for a moment, then took out her phone and dialed Dr. Wang's number.

It was already 1 a.m., but to everyone's surprise, Dr. Wang answered the phone immediately, "Speak!"

"Dr. Wang, Li Tianbao is meditating! He said he's been sitting for over an hour," the nurse said.

Dr. Wang: "I'll grant you remote authorization in a bit. Turn on the ward monitoring and send it to my phone."

The nurse looked somewhat embarrassed: "According to hospital regulations, the surveillance cameras in the east ward must be turned off after the lights are turned off; there are rules in the admission service..."

On the phone, Dr. Wang interrupted abruptly, "I moved aside!"

"it is good."

The nurse hung up the phone and shrugged.

……

……

The next day, at nine o'clock in the morning.

Li Tianbao, dressed in a hospital gown, strolled around the compound, heading towards the main canteen.

When the sun is shining, patients in the East Wing will organize themselves to sunbathe and move around freely outside.

As Li Tianbao walked along, many patients would greet him.

Good morning, Master Bao.

Good morning.

Li Tianbao arrived at the cafeteria, got his meal, and found a seat.

It was almost nine o'clock in the morning, and the cafeteria was empty except for a cleaning lady who was cleaning.

According to the rules, it was long past breakfast time, but Li Tianbao was different. It was his first day in the hospital, and he was not used to it. After finishing his cultivation yesterday, he slept until now, and no one woke him up.

On the stainless steel dining table was breakfast: several steamed buns, a fried dough stick, and a bowl of soy milk. Li Tianbao ate with relish, smacking his lips.

Dr. Wang pulled up a stool, sat opposite him, and said with a smile, "Little Li, you have a good appetite."

While eating, Li Tianbao mumbled, "Not bad, it's been a long time since I've eaten here."

Dr. Wang: "You can come and eat anytime you like."

Li Tianbao: "I lived here for a week when I was in the second year of junior high school, but it doesn't smell the same as before!"

Dr. Wang chuckled: "Back then, Dean Yang was your attending physician. I heard he was the one who helped you get rid of your internet addiction."

Li Tianbao: "My dad brought me here. He personally handed me over to Dean Yang. I got shocked four times in total. After that, I never played games again! I wasn't completely free until I went to university in Zhengzhou!"

Dr. Wang sighed. "Dean Yang's approach was a bit extreme. Don't hate him. And don't hate your father either. He's just worried you'll become addicted to games."

Li Tianbao laughed it off and buried his head in his food.

Dr. Wang's expression turned serious, and he asked solemnly, "Were you meditating last night?"

With a thud, Li Tianbao's chopsticks fell onto the table. He pulled out a tissue and elegantly wiped his mouth.

"You're using a security camera to monitor me while I sleep?!"

Dr. Wang leaned back and raised his chin. "I need to understand the situation to help you."

Li Tianbao said with slight anger, "If this is how your hospital operates, I'm not staying! I've read the admission regulations; you can't monitor the wards after lights out. What if my second uncle is masturbating in the middle of the night, and you see him? That would be so embarrassing!"

Dr. Wang's face turned ashen. "Xiao Li, don't get agitated."

Li Tianbao: "That's right, I'm meditating."

Dr. Wang looked on with curiosity, "Where did you learn all this? You can sit still for three hours."

Li Tianbao said casually, "I learned it from the movies. I'm practicing the Nine Yang Divine Skill. Dr. Wang, would you like to learn? I'll teach you."

Dr. Wang was speechless. This was a materialistic world, and in his worldview, there was no such thing as internal energy cultivation as depicted in novels and movies. However, Li Tianbao's situation was very special, and he was very curious about it.

"Take your time eating, I have a meeting." Dr. Wang stood up, put the chair back in its place, and left the cafeteria with his hands behind his back.

Li Tianbao silently watched Dr. Wang's retreating figure, pondering as he ate.

Reflecting on my experience during my cultivation at midnight last night, just like last time, the rosy mass in my spiritual center pulsated with my breath and slowly grew during cultivation.

Li Tianbao felt that his strength seemed to have increased, and his five senses were also more acute.

Li Tianbao's phone rang. He discovered that the Nezha costume he ordered yesterday had arrived at the courier station near his second uncle's house.

Back in the ward, the second uncle lay on the bed playing on his phone and asked, "Nephew, was it fun?"

"I have to go back; no one will feed my dog."

The second uncle said, "I've already told your mother that the husky won't go hungry; she'll feed it in the morning."

Li Tianbao: "Second Uncle, shall we go out for lunch?"

Yin Jianshe shifted to a more comfortable lying position and continued playing on his phone. He seemed to be enjoying himself. "I'm not going. The money your mom paid for me includes food expenses. It would be a waste if I didn't eat! I'll eat at the hospital."

"Do you like living in a mental hospital?" Li Tianbao asked.

Yin Jianshe nodded: "I love it! Don't you think it's wonderful here? There's food and drink, and no housework! Plus, there are other patients to play with. There's a Go tournament in the multimedia room at 10 o'clock, and I've already signed up."

Li Tianbao suddenly realized that his second uncle's words made a lot of sense. "Where's Baoqiang?"

"A few police officers came and took me to the next room to give a statement."

After waiting for about half an hour,

After much deliberation, Li Tianbao decided he still had to go back!

He swaggered all the way to the front gate.

When the gatekeeper saw Li Tianbao coming, he let him through without even asking any questions.

Li Tianbao sensed something was wrong and asked suspiciously, "Aren't you going to stop me?"

The security guard smiled and said, "Dr. Wang has already spoken to you; you're free."

Li Tianbao felt something was off, but he still rode a shared bicycle through the alleys to the old neighborhood where his second uncle's house was located.

The wind blew in from the alley entrance, making Li Tianbao's neck tingle; he always felt like a pair of eyes were pressed against his back.

Dr. Wang is acting strangely. Something's really wrong. Why is he letting me come and go as I please? I'm a critically ill patient! Even if it's for my mother's sake, he shouldn't be doing this. Isn't he afraid something will happen to me?

Li Tianbao went to the express delivery station to pick up his package. He then went to his second uncle's courtyard.

Before the large iron gate was even opened, the urgent howling of the dog could be heard coming from inside the courtyard, its paws scrambling against the gate with a loud bang.

"Third Master! You're back?" The voice of the Howling Celestial Dog was filled with barely suppressed excitement.

Li Tianbao opened the large iron gate to the courtyard, and Xiaotian Dog immediately pounced over, circling around him.

"Third Master, are we going to the sheep farm in Luoshi County today?"

There was more than half a bowl of dog food left in the dog bowl in the corner, with a few pieces of jerky on top. "Did my mom feed you?"

"Yes, your mother arrived early this morning, around 6 a.m. She poured out dog food and water, tidied up your room, and then left."

Li Tianbao: "My Nezha costume arrived. I'll try out the acting method."

"Okay!" The celestial dog followed behind, hopping along happily.

Li Tianbao walked into his small bedroom and closed the door behind him.

I opened the package and took out the Nezha costume.

A red silk bodice trimmed with gold, a lotus-shaped skirt sprayed with gold powder, chainmail made of pieced-together plastic, and a plastic fire-tipped spear. It all exudes a cheap feel.

Li Tianbao complained: "Buyer's show and seller's show are two different things."

"Damn it, where are the Wind Fire Wheels and the Universe Ring?!"

After taking off her clothes, she changed into a bodice, chainmail, and a lotus-patterned skirt...

Li Tianbao looked at himself in the mirror, a faint smile playing on his lips, and said softly, "I am Nezha."

One second, two seconds, three seconds.

The red fleshy mass in the mind's eye showed no reaction.

"No effect?" Li Tianbao frowned, took off his shoes, and stood barefoot. He then tied his hair into two pigtails sticking up in the air.

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and the image of Nezha riding on his Wind Fire Wheels and holding his Fire-Tipped Spear appeared in his mind, completely immersing himself in it.

When he opened his eyes again, the person in the mirror had a sharper look in them, and he said in a deep voice, "I am Nezha!"

Still no response.

"Something's not right." Li Tianbao was completely baffled. "Last time on the rooftop, I just casually changed into Chen Rui's red underwear. The look was nowhere near as good as it is now, and my mind reacted!"

Howling Celestial Dog: "Third Master, don't you feel anything?"

"Why is it that acting more convincingly doesn't work?" Li Tianbao sat on the bed, dejected. He rummaged through the closet and discovered Chen Rui's underwear was missing. Turning around, he asked, "Where's Chen Rui's underwear?!"

Xiaotian: "When your mother came to clean the room this morning, she took it away. You didn't see her expression at the time; I can't describe it."

Li Tianbao pondered for a moment, then said, "Why was it that last time on the rooftop, when I wore Chen Rui's clothes... even though it was the same impersonation technique, I could feel the restlessness in my spiritual center? Should we go to her rooftop and steal a couple more clothes to try?"

Howling Celestial Dog: "Third Master, your intentions were pure when you were saving Leopard Head! It has nothing to do with wearing women's underwear! Besides, those were washed, they don't smell good, what's the point of stealing them!"

Li Tianbao: "You mean, it would be useful to steal something that hasn't been washed?"

Howling Celestial Dog: "Third Master, that's a perverted act. You weren't like this when you were in Heaven."

Li Tianbao: "Hey, I thought practicing the impersonation method was a shortcut that could directly restore magical power!"

The Celestial Dog comforted him, saying, "Acting is just a formality, like a monk wearing a robe to chant scriptures. He has to abide by the rules and regulations! Only after leaving the monastic life and taking off the robe can he be a hooligan. Do you understand what I mean?"

Li Tianbao smirked. "You've never seen someone who can act like a thug even while wearing a monk's robe."

The Celestial Hound said, "Focus on your cultivation. You've only been cultivating for two days, but you've already made rapid progress."

"Still exercises are like adding water to a water tank; they only become full over time. But dynamic exercises require real combat experience, ideally involving life-or-death battles! It's like boiling the water in the tank with fire."

"By alternating between movement and stillness, one refines the spiritual platform. After achieving minor success, one can attempt to cultivate the Samadhi True Fire, and thus gain magical power!"

"My current level is still within the realm of physics, which isn't surprising!" Li Tianbao said. "Meditation is no problem; I can just meditate every night! But dynamic exercises are difficult. Where are the opportunities for real combat? How about I try being an athlete?"

Howling Celestial Dog: "Simply exercising isn't very meaningful; it can only improve physical fitness! Real combat is essential, like yesterday's fight between you and that lunatic!"

Li Tianbao nodded seriously, "Indeed, I fought Han Dazhuang yesterday, and in that critical moment, I truly felt it!"

Xiaotian said, "Chen Rui works at the Public Security Bureau. Are there any violent cases, gangsters, drug lords, or anything like that?"

"These days, who in the underworld dares to fight? They're all playing the economic game! Back in my second uncle's generation, the underworld was all about fighting."

Li Tianbao took out his phone and searched for boxing matches, mixed martial arts matches, and the like. He found the Wulin Feng preliminary rounds, sat up straight, and looked at them carefully.

"Xiaotian, I'm going to fight Wulin Feng!"

Li Tianbao clicked on a promotional video from the organizer, and a loud song began to play: "With boundless ambition, who can rival me..."

The video features group photos of boxers from all over the world, representing various ethnicities, and includes clips of numerous live fight matches.

The Celestial Dog craned its neck to look, then nodded, "I think it's a good idea."

"The audition for Xincheng next week will be right in front of the Baijiafu Supermarket, it's like heaven is helping me out!"

Howling Celestial Dog said, "Aren't we going to the sheep farm to find the spirit beast? We need to revive Leopard Head first."

Li Tianbao: "Dr. Wang didn't restrict my freedom, but I always felt like he was secretly monitoring me."