From unemployment in crosstalk to top star in Chinese entertainment

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Dinner at the Mushroom House

In the courtyard, the setting sun slanted down from above the courtyard wall, bathing the entire dining table in a warm orange hue.

Braised pork ribs, sweet and sour pork, imitation crab, smoked fish, vegetarian tofu, braised green beans, stir-fried beef with fermented bean curd... ten dishes and a soup, laid out to the brim.

Yu Liang glanced at it and silently counted in his mind: Huang's Ten Famous Dishes, three of them were gathered tonight.

Yu Liang didn't dare ask whether the remaining seven dishes were due to insufficient ingredients or simply because Teacher Huang couldn't remember them all.

"Did Teacher Huang cook all of this?" Yang Mi exclaimed in surprise.

Tong Liya and Qi Wei exchanged a knowing glance.

They stayed there for two more days and had learned to say "Thank you for your hard work, Teacher Huang" in an amazed tone, while precisely avoiding the word "delicious".

"That's right, who else could it be but me?" Huang Lei sat on the bench and wiped the sweat from his forehead with a towel.

"Thank you for your hard work, Teacher Huang," Yang Mi said.

Yu Liang glanced at her. He didn't know how hard Teacher Huang worked, but soon Sister Mi would realize how miserable her life was.

After taking her seat, Reba looked at the table full of food, pursed her lips, and her eyes shone like a little glutton waiting for dinner.

"Hurry up and eat, stop looking around," Huang Lei said.

"Come on, let's eat!" He Jiong was the first to pick up a mouthful of shredded potatoes, and after just a couple of chews, he exclaimed, "My goodness, these potatoes are so delicious!"

Reba couldn't wait any longer and picked up a piece with her chopsticks. The moment the shredded potatoes entered her mouth, her expression faltered for a very subtle moment, about 0.3 seconds, before she quickly adjusted to a vigorous nod.

"tasty!"

He recalled how Dilraba had swallowed her saliva before she arrived, and seeing her "delicious" expression now, he found it strangely cute.

Yang Mi picked up a piece of pork rib. As she bit into it, her brow twitched almost imperceptibly.

Then she put down her chopsticks, wiped her mouth with a napkin, and when she looked up, she had regained a relatively calm smile.

"It's incredibly flavorful, Teacher Huang."

Yu Liang mentally gave her a thumbs up. No wonder she's the queen of controversy; using her acting skills for something as trivial as eating is a waste of her talent.

Yang Mi didn't give up and picked up another piece of sweet and sour pork. This time she was mentally prepared, but the moment the pork entered her mouth, a trace of inexplicable confusion still flashed across her face.

She chewed much slower, as if she was using all her willpower to figure out what the taste was.

"Isn't Teacher Huang going to eat?" Yu Liang asked.

"I'll rest for a bit, then I'll eat." Huang Lei waved his hand, his gaze falling on Yu Liang's bowl. "Yu Liang, why are you only eating rice and not any vegetables?"

Yu Liangmian remained unfazed: "I have a problem; I have to eat carbohydrates first when I eat, otherwise my stomach will feel uncomfortable."

As he spoke, he ladled out another bowl of noodles with soybean paste. The soybean paste was a ready-made sauce that Huang Lei had taken from the refrigerator; it was the only thing Yu Liang felt comfortable eating at the entire table.

He Jiong saw the atmosphere at the table turning cold, and that wouldn't do. This program was co-invested by him and Huang Lei, and Huang Lei's persona was the show's selling point.

He quickly ladled out a spoonful of soup, took a sip, and closed his eyes: "Mmm—this soup makes me feel so much better. It's amazing how delicious it is."

"You agree, Ya Ya?"

Tong Liya nodded: "Yes, it tastes especially good."

Qi Wei silently ate her rice without even looking up. She had only one thought in her mind: eat her fill quickly so she wouldn't have to touch her chopsticks anymore.

Huang Lei picked up a plate of stir-fried beef with fermented bean curd and handed it to Da Hua: "Da Hua, try this. It was supposed to be with fermented bean paste, but we were out of it. It should taste alright."

Da Hua stretched out his chopsticks. Yu Liang saw his hand, which was picking up food, pause in mid-air for a fraction of a second, as if he were mentally preparing himself.

The moment the beef entered his mouth, Da Hua's facial expression management system immediately crashed. His brow twitched, and the corner of his mouth twitched; this bite exposed Da Hua's mask of pain.

"Is it good, Dahua?" Huang Lei looked at him with a smile.

"It's delicious." Da Hua nodded vigorously, his voice rising a half-tone higher than usual. "It's really delicious."

Yu Liang silently looked away. He had figured out a pattern: you can't watch Huang Lei cook too closely.

The egg mixture in the sweet and sour pork was mixed with hawthorn seeds, and the sauce for the stir-fried beef with fermented bean curd had been stirred with the spoon he had already tasted. As for the plate of braised green beans, Huang Lei had learned from the lesson of almost sending Song Dandan away in the first season, and he was particularly careful when making them, simmering and tasting them several times. However, he poured the sauce he had tasted back into the pot without batting an eye.

"It's hot, isn't it? Here, have a piece of sweet and sour pork."

Huang Lei got up and specifically brought the sweet and sour pork to Reba.

Dilraba hurriedly shook her head: "No, no, no, Mr. Huang Lei, I don't eat pork."

Huang Lei was stunned for a moment, then suddenly realized that Reba was Uyghur and had never eaten pork since she was a child.

He slapped his forehead: "Right, right, right, my memory."

The atmosphere at the table became somewhat awkward for a moment.

Just then, a cawing sound came from the pavilion.

They are colored lights. The little duckling that He Jiong accidentally picked up in the first season is lying in the shadow of the pavilion, tilting its head and watching the group of people eating.

He Jiong's eyes lit up, as if he had found a topic to talk about. "Hey, speaking of colored lights—you know what? It seems like the hens in the yard laid eggs today."

Huang Lei put down his chopsticks, and his eyes lit up.

"The thing about hens laying eggs—" he cleared his throat and sat up straight, "is actually quite painful."

Everyone at the table paused for a moment.

"Think about it, you can't just keep straining here," Huang Lei pointed to his lower abdomen, his tone serious. "You need to feel it in your lower back and abdomen. Because you're ovulating, you know? You need to do this—enjoy it a little."

When he said the word "enjoy," he leaned back slightly, half-closed his eyes, and made an indescribable demonstration gesture that was somewhere between a performance lesson and being possessed by a hen.

Yu Liang's chopsticks froze in mid-air.

He looked at Huang Lei's face with such natural seriousness; it was truly a rare sight to see a university professor giving career guidance to a hen.

He turned and glanced at Dahua and Pengpeng.

The two young people were looking down, picking at the rice in their bowls with their chopsticks, their faces showing a focused expression that said, "If I don't nod, I'm disrespecting my elders."

Da Hua noticed Yu Liang's gaze, looked up, and forced a smile at him.

That smile conveyed four words: You'll get used to it.

Yu Liang suddenly understood why Da Hua ran away with the bucket after filming the second season, and even almost abandoned the antidote for the green bean poisoning.

Teacher Huang's skill in training people is something that most people can't withstand.

Every meal is like accumulating credits; you can't graduate until you finish eating them all.

With Huang Lei supervising the meal as he ate, it finally came to an end.

Qiwei almost cried while trying to eat less, and said with red eyes, "Teacher Huang, this smoked fish is so delicious. The taste reminds me of my grandfather."

Yu Liang glanced at her. She thought to herself, "Is Qiwei's grandfather's cooking really this bad?"

Huang Lei took it seriously. He looked at Qi Wei with heartache and immediately decided, "Then we'll pack up the remaining half of the smoked fish for Qi Wei to take away tomorrow."

Qiwei sobbed a few times, a few tears sliding down her face, and then squeezed out a "Thank you, Teacher Huang".

"Dahua, Pengpeng, get ready." Huang Lei got up to take a shower.

He Jiong also helped clear the dishes.

Tong Liya, Qi Wei, Yang Mi, and Reba quickly stood up: "Teacher He, you rest, we'll do it."

The girls worked efficiently, and in no time they had cleared the table clean. The bowls and chopsticks were put back in their places, the tabletops were wiped, and even the bone fragments on the floor were swept away.

Night had completely fallen.

In the courtyard of the Mushroom House, warm yellow string lights illuminated the gazebo. The mountain night breeze, carrying the scent of earth and bamboo leaves, blew in from outside the courtyard wall, causing the string lights to sway gently.

Four girls sat in the pavilion, chatting idly.

At the other end of the courtyard, Dahua and Pengpeng pestered Yu Liang to teach them the essentials of chopping wood.

Yu Liang demonstrated twice, then leaned against the pavilion pillar to watch them practice, occasionally correcting their posture.

The girls' conversation drifted over faintly.

"Mimi, are you close to Yu Liang?" Qiwei asked in a low voice.

"It's alright." Yang Mi leaned back in her chair. "We just had more contact during the competition."

"What's he like in private?" Tong Liya asked curiously.

Yang Mi thought for a moment, then smiled slightly: "She's pretty much the same as on camera—witty and bold. Her most notable characteristic is that she's extremely meticulous with her accounts."

"What account?" Reba didn't react.

Yang Mi picked up her teacup and said casually, "It's a debt of gratitude."

She didn't elaborate.

But those three words, carried on the night wind, left the remaining three girls in a moment of silence, each lost in their own thoughts.

The topic of conversation unconsciously shifted to romantic love between men and women.

Qiwei, always outspoken, asked Reba directly, "Reba, do you have a boyfriend now?"

Dilraba is unwilling to discuss such privacy issues on the show.

She shook her head: "No, I just want to focus on filming right now, I don't want to be in a relationship."

"Why?" Tong Liya couldn't help but ask.

Dilraba frowned and organized her thoughts: "Because I feel that if you can't find someone who is a perfect match for you in a relationship, it becomes very complicated."

"How complicated is it?" Qiwei pressed.

Reba thought for a moment and gave an analogy: "For example, if I want to eat a small cake, and you date an older guy, he'll buy you a sponge cake. If you date a younger guy, he'll say he wants to eat one too."

"If you date a greasy guy, he'll say he's just a small cake. If you date someone your own age, he'll say, 'What should I do, baby?'"

As soon as she finished speaking, everyone burst into laughter. Qi Wei laughed so hard she slapped the table, Tong Liya covered her mouth with her hands, and Yang Mi, unusually, leaned back with a laugh.

The laughter didn't stop for quite a while.

Tong Liya wiped away the tears from the corners of her eyes, glanced at the other end of the yard, and asked in a low voice, "So, which type do you think Peng Peng is?"

Reba replied without hesitation: "Peng Peng is honest; he'll definitely say he wants to eat too."

"Where's Dahua?"

Qiwei quickly answered, "Do you even need to ask? He's so greasy, you'd definitely say he's a little cake."

The group burst into laughter again.

Yang Mi rarely spoke up, but she analyzed, "If that's the case, Teacher Huang won't buy you a cake, but he'll make you a fresh sponge cake."

"Teacher He—" Tong Liya chimed in, "You hadn't even said you wanted to eat it, and the cake was already bought and placed in front of you."

The four girls nodded in unison, agreeing that the conclusion was absolutely accurate.

"What about Yu Liang?"

Qi Wei blurted out the question.

The four of them were silent for a full second.

Then, without prior arrangement, they all looked towards the other end of the courtyard.

Yu Liang was holding Peng Peng's wrist, correcting the angle of his wood-chopping, his handsome profile revealed in the halo of the string lights.

"Him—" Qiwei, who was always straightforward, suddenly smiled meaningfully, "He would say that he has high testicles."

Tong Liya and Reba were both stunned for a moment, clearly they didn't understand.

Yang Mi was stunned for a moment, then realized what she meant and burst into laughter, covering her mouth.

"Qiwei!" Tong Liya finally realized what was happening, blushing as she playfully punched her. "We're filming a show right now!"

"What did I say?" Qiwei feigned innocence. "I only said cake."

Yang Mi smiled knowingly.

Just then, Huang Lei came out of the house wearing slippers and pajamas, his hair still dripping wet.

"Next, who's going to wash?" he called out into the yard.

He Jiong glanced at the girls and said, "How about ladies first?"

Qiwei waved her hand: "Let the boys go first, you guys wash faster."

He Jiong thought for a moment, then turned to look at Yu Liang, who was playing around with Peng Peng and Da Hua at the other end of the courtyard: "Yu Liang, you are a guest, you go first."

"Okay, Teacher He." Yu Liang patted the sawdust off his clothes and then went into the room.

Then she rummaged through her suitcase for a change of clothes and headed towards the bathroom.

Seeing that it was getting late and the evening breeze was quite cool, He Jiong suggested, "Why don't we go inside and play the counting horse game?"

Dahua and Pengpeng nodded.

This game is considered a classic from Mushroom House.

They could already imagine the bewildered look on the faces of the girls who couldn't count how many horses there were.

Seven or eight minutes later, Yu Liang came out.

He was wearing a clean white T-shirt and black sweatpants; his tall stature gave him a refreshing, boyish charm.

People who don't know Yu Liang might think he's a pure-hearted college boy who ran away from some university.

"Who's next to wash?" Yu Liang said as he dried his half-dry hair with a white towel.

The people playing the counting horse game in the living room all turned around.

"Wow, this guy is so handsome!"

Da Hua and Peng Peng were startled and couldn't help but exchange a glance.

This... how are we supposed to wash it off if we're wearing makeup?!

"Hey," Qiwei nudged Tong Liya with her elbow, lowering her voice to avoid being recorded by the production crew, "This guy looks even more handsome after taking a shower."

"Hey, Qiwei, do you think Yu Liang is even more handsome than your husband?" Tong Liya said with a mischievous grin.

Qiwei nodded, then quickly came to her senses and denied it.

She glanced at Tong Liya, whose evil scheme had succeeded.

She then pinched Tong Liya's slender waist and scolded playfully, "Sister Yaya, you're so naughty!"

"No, what are they doing?" Da Hua asked, puzzled, looking at Qi Wei and the other woman who were playing around.

Pengpeng shook his head. "I don't know. Maybe it got angry because it couldn't count many horses."